From a paradise called mumma's arms
03 May 2013
Dear Papa,
I am hurt...very hurt. No, don't get me wrong, I am super happy to be back home and back in mumma's lap with you right beside her. But it isn't the same, is it papa? I dreamt of this moment for one month...that I'll be back in your arms one day and you and and mumma and I will have the tightest group hug ever. I am still waiting...because it isn't the same, is it papa? I was very well taken care of by that nice lady and the kids there, yet I would keep my eyes reverted to the door for your steps. Then Chachi/chachu came and got me back...and then I saw both of you running out. I saw you smiling and being happy for chachi/chachu and I kept waiting for either of you to take me, yet when it happened, there was something missing...that look you had only for me isn't the same, is it papa? You didn't know it was me...your Superboy...your buddy...right?
Yet it was not because you didn't take me and hug me and kiss me that hurt me...what hurt me was the look in yours and mumma's eyes. I have been inside mumma, riding her heartbeats for seven months...I can safely say that I know her inside out. That spark is missing...that glow is missing...that warmth is missing. Your love for each other is the same I can sense that...but you two are no more the same with each other. I have seen you both in a world of your own in the middle of this kind of family hullaballoo...but today you stood alone and apart. And that hurt me...badly.
Papa, how do you think I survived the past month without both of you? I survived because you and ma taught me to survive. You remember those early says of my stay in mumma's tummy? So many times I gave up, but mumma didn't...you didn't. Even when the doctors were against my existence, you nurtured me, loved me, gave me the strength to live. I found the will...the strength...the desire to see this world only because I saw you and mumma together...loving each other, caring for each other, comforting each other in low times and laughing together in happier moments, and most importantly, being there for each other. That's what made me fight to live...I took pride in the fact that I was the symbol of your love...that I was the only witness to your beautiful and sacred moments of love...that I was one of the main reasons that you both loved each other so much. The memory of this love got me going during the kidnapping and later in that orphanage. Whenever I missed you, all I had to do was close my eyes and picture you and mumma together...and bhaiya and didis running in to talk to me across mumma's tummy. This beautiful vision was my strength.
Where has that love gone papa? Why are you so angry with mumma? You know how sad she gets without you, yet you kept yourself away from her...I know you did papa. I can see and gauge the distance in your eyes. Don't do this to her papa. Don't do this to yourself. You both look like a ghost of your selves...that's cause you are not complete without each other. If I can see that, why can't you? How can I come to you if you don't go to each other first. Your first union saw me step into mumma's tummy...and now till your hearts let go of all the sad thoughts and reunite, I cannot be in your arms as your son...even though I'll be in the house, being called chachu's son. If you are distanced from each other, I'll be distanced from you...Find each other and you shall find me.
Love each other again, papa. Forgive her...understand her...try to find out whether she really was in the wrong. You know her more than anyone else in the world...You are her strength and you are her weakness. She can't lose you. I saw how scared she was on the day of the kidnapping when she thought she had lost you in that accident. If she erred that day, it's because she loves you. Step forward...hug her like you used to...and you will see your Aayu in front of you.
You are still and you shall always be the best papa in the world. I love you now...and forever.
Yours and only your son
Aayu
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Note on Page 4.
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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