Posted:
Jail wala Love! Which is 100% Full on Gutter
A Wild Idea strikes my mind at the hour of 4am as I hum mechanically to 'Pal Pal Dil Ke Pass Tum Rehti hoo' and idea, here's it in proper words. But not proofed. 🤣
Acknowledgement: Sohini aka Bunny of the Forum (sophiya_92)! Thank you for being patient enough for more than an hour in that drowsy state just to hear my gutter, just like the Producers do to the scriptwriters! 🤗
A\n : Read it aloud to yourself! The Gutter-panti lies in its Audible-ness🤣
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Ankie Gutter Presents
Jail wala Love! Which is 100% Full on Gutter 🤣 🤣 🤣
Starring
Karan Singh Grover as Mr Asad Ahmed Khan
Surbhi Jyoti as Zoya Farooqui
Shalini Kapoor Sagar as Dilshaad Ahmed Khan
Karan Wahi as Ayaan Ahmed Khan
Ketki Kadam as Humeira Siddiqui
Archana Taide as Nikhat Ahmed Khan
Alka Kaushal as Razia Siddiqui
Vaqaur Shiek as Rashid Ahmed Khan
Shabnam as Shirin Ahmed Khan
Tej Sapru as Gaffur Siddiqui
Imagine this. What if QH was a movie, movie of the century tracing back to the golden eras of 1960s and 1970s! Yeah you read right! Impala in place of SUV, Lush green gardens and small housing complexes, Bullet bikes and most of all Bellbottom trousers with Floral Print Shirts and Long skirts with Frilled blouses.
Smell of Desi Gheee mein tale huye Pakode with Garam Garam Cutting chai flaring up the nostrils? Good Job Ankie! 🤣
So I take you directly to the scene that starts from where Asad Ahmed Khan as killed Razia Siddique in an act of Self Defense! Don't go into details as that's not important as how Razia is killed or not! But then the scene starts as :
Asad wearing Sunflower Print Shirt and wearing loosely white trousers, His hands drenched in blood.
Zoya, wearing a white Salwar Kameez. Hair open. Kajal smuggled.
In the scene also present Dilshad, Rashid, And Zingo Hotties. All are proud but crying. Cause Asad will now be sent to jail.
Siren of the police *tiidaa tiddaa tiidaa* coming in a Blue color ka van. Policemen are wearing khaki colored shirts and half pants!
Dilshad : *crying silently* 'Asad! Tumhe aap jana hoga kya?'
Asad : 'Ammi! Mujhe toh saza katna hoi padega! Yea toh kuch dino ka waqt hai, yun dekhte dekhte kat jayengey! Ammi app please Mat rooiye! Yea toh hona hi tha!'
Zoya : *shocked* *crying silently* *puppy dog eyes*
The commissioner comes and says 'You have done a very good job Asad, magar kanoon ko apne haathon lene ke jurm mein apko 3 hafte ki saza guzarni padegi!'
Zoya is looking at Asad and crying. She clutches Asad's elbow tightly and doesn't want to leave him. Big tears roll down her eyes and her eyes are red.
Scene II
Focus on Asad and Zoya. Everybody go into the background.
Asad : *hugging Zoya* *drying Zoya's tears* 'Roo mat Zoya! Yea 3 hafte dekhte dekhte katt jayengey!' Tum mujhe zyada miss nahi karne wali! Roo mat Zoya Roo mat tumhare akhon mein Noo Tears noo noo noo Tears!'
Zoya : *crying* 'Naahii Mr Khan app aise kaise jaa sakte hai?! App sachii mein mentally challenged hai!'
Asad : *facepalm* 'Main jaldi aajaunga Zoya! Tum mujhe zyada miss nahi karogi!'
A constable barges in : 'Haam babhi sir jaldi ghar ajayegey!'
Zoya : *angry* 'Abbey chup kar! Hamara Mitwaa moment naa kharab kar! Bhag yahan se!'
*looking into Asad's eyes* *puppy dog eyes* 'Aisa nahi hota Mr Khan!'
Asad : *caressing her cheeks* 'Zoya tum apna khayal rakhna! Khana pani time pe khana! Dhere dhere chalna aur akhen khuli rakh kar chalna! Aur Ayaan ke saath bilkul baatein mat karna!'
Zoya : *resting her head on Asad's shoulders* 'Mr Khan aap zyada gussa mat hona! Aur gusse mein aake matka mat phodna!Matka photo gaya toh apko pani nahi milega! Pani nahi milega toh aap ko aur gussa ayegaa! Apko aur gussa ayegaa toh-'
*everybody asleep in the background snoring loudly*
Zoya : *screaming* 'Mitwaa moment abhi aayegaa!'
*everyone wakes up with a startle*
Asad : *teary* 'Zoya! Tum mujhse milne aaoogi naa?'
Zoya : *crying* 'Haan Mr Khan! Hum thay inke sahare. . . Woh huye naa hamaree. . .'
*everyone crying in the back ground*
Zoya : *sniffing* 'Jaldi ayeega Mr Khan! Apke Chunnu Munnu apka intezaar kar rahe hongey!'
Everyone in chorus : CHUNNU MUNNU???
Asad : *startled* 'Zoya?? Chunnu Munnu?'
Zoya : 'Allah! Miyaa! What is wrong with you Mr Khan? App nahi ayengey toh hamari Nikaah nahi hogi1 Nikhaah nahi hogi toh Chuunnu Muunnu kahan se hongey?'
Everybody : 'Ohh!'
Zoya : *crying* 'Mr Khan!!! Mujhe chor ke mat jayee please!!'
Asad : *crying* 'Naahii Zoyaa! Mujhee jana hi hogaa!'
Commissioner : 'Miss Farooqi, apki mohobaat missal hai! Issiliye main Mr Khan ko baa izzat bali karta hoon!'
Zoya : *screaming* 'What the flying turkey? Apka deemag toh kharab nahi hogaya hai?'
Asad : *growling* 'Yes Commissioner Shahab! Apka dimag thikane hai naa?'
Commissioner: *confused* 'Naahii! Kyun??'
Zoya : *hugging Asad* 'Kyunki mujhe Jail wala Love bachpan se enact karna tha! Aur jab itna aacha mauka mila hai tab apko aise issko ruin karne ki padi hai?!'
*Commissioner and everyone confused*
Zoya : *lovey dovey* 'Main Safed saariee pehenkar tiffin box lekaar Mr Khan se milne jaungi, Mr Khan pathhar kaat rahe hongey! Main Jail ke bahar unka itejaar karungi! Woh daute daute un chains mein lipte huye halat mein mere pass ayengey! Aur hum gale milgey! Aur ap logo ko isse aacha Mitwaa Moment kahan mil sakta hai Commissioner ke Man?'
Asad : 'You forgot my sweaty six packs Zoya!'
Zoya : ' Haan aur woh bhi!'
Commissioner : 'Le jaaoo inhe jaldi jaldi! I don't want to waste any Mitwaa Moments!'
Zoya : *to herself* 'Abhi aayii Akal thikane!'
*they take Asad away*
Zoya : 'Please Mr Khan! Main aap se jaldi milne aaungi!'
Asad : 'Zoo-Yaaa!'
Zoya ' Mr Khaan!'
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Well that was something! Now tell me what was it? 🤣
In Short Full on Gutter issey kehtey hai! 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣
🤣 Ankie
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