***Part 13***
The door creaked open and I heard Virat's voice. He was shouting obscenities. "I helped you when you needed it the most. I trusted you implicitly but you, you..." I heard him scream. It all fades into the background for me. He must have seen and heard everything. He had mentioned that there was a central surveillance room with video and audio feeds from every room in the house.
I am not going to let him do this to her. Meredith was standing in front of him with her head down. Blanco was standing in the corner and Virat looks like he might murder her. "Leave her alone Virat" I walk upto her and stop him.
"Blanco, please escort Meredith outside." I request.
I felt his piercing gaze on me. I look at him. There was only one emotion riding his face- fear.
We look at each other, our eyes locking in the most grueling battle. He was asking a lot of things from me. I was not willing to give him anything, I refuse to even understand what he was trying to communicate. I hear the door lock behind Blanco and Meredith. They were gone. It was only us both in the room. I don't know what to do. No, correction, I don't know what to do with Virat. All this confrontation has strangely brought upon me a sense of closure. I know what to do exactly. I have never felt clearer in my head. I summon upon all my strengths.
"I want a divorce." I spell it out loud and clear.
He closes his eyes shut tightly. "No, no, no." he held his head and started walking away from me hurriedly. He was fidgeting nervously. He came back and stood right in front of me. "You promised you wouldn't leave." His voice was shaking. He was pacing again. "No, no, no." It was all cries, desperate cries. "Let's talk baby, let's figure this out. Please don't believe her, it's a bunch of bull...pleaaase." He pleads.
"Virat, I have had enough of this drama. Frankly, I have nothing to tell you and nothing to listen from you. I couldn't be more done with you. We don't have a marriage anymore. I would like that stated officially. I will move out of the house shortly, once I figure out things."
"NO!!!" he screamed.
"YES!!! STOP IT WITH THE FREAK SHOW ALREADY! YOU f**kED YOUR SECRETARY. THAT'S THE TRUTH. ACCEPT IT!!" I cannot believe my own voice and the belligerence in it but I wasn't nearly done.
He was silent, shocked.
"You repeatedly, blatantly and shamelessly lied to my face. You made me question my judgment and common-sense. I f**king caught you in bed with her and I still believed that you might be innocent. That's how stupid I am!!!!!!!! That's how-stupidly-much I loved you, you bas***d! But you, YOU deserve none of that. And for the last time, leave me to my plight. It's OVER." It was like I had a forest fire inside me and I spat out everything at him, leaving him in flames.
"It's not like that." It was a whisper, he could barely speak. After a minute, he spoke again "Manvi, I never ever lied to you. I don't remember even touching her. God! I don't know how to convince you. Yes, I was drunk at the party. Yes, I remember missing you like crazy and yes, I remember Karan bringing me home in his car. But the next thing I remember is waking up in my bed, by myself and calling you, and worrying about why you hadn't called me at all, on such a big day. I remember calling your camp manager and asking about you and rushing to the camp only to find you missing. And since then, I remember my life fall apart right in front of my eyes. Please believe me Manvi, I do not remember Meredith or anybody else for that matter."
"Ohh poor thing, you were drugged and raped??? Is that it??" my voice was dripping with caustic sarcasm.
"Arghhh! How do I explain it? What she said is not believable on so many levels. Do you know how I was these last few years? I was always drunk dammit, I was always buzzing high, to try and forget you. I searched for you in so many girls but they never even remotely resembled you. Me being sedated doesn't matter Manvi, I can recognize you with my eyes closed, my hands bound, in a heart-beat. I can never ever mistake someone else to be you."
"Oh puhleaseee, stop it with the twisted crap Virat!! So you are saying, not only me, Meredith is also lying!! No girl would ever own upto something like that Virat. Show some respect towards a girl if not anything else. Can you tell me that you are one hundred percent positive than nothing happened that day, even after hearing to Meredith?"
"It's extremely unlikely that something happened between us. If it did, then god save me because I don't know shit. All this is so unbelievable. I need time to figure things out." I said calmly.
"Whatever. I don't want to hear this anymore. I am sick and tired of all this. I am taking the kids and moving out. You can come and meet with the kids whenever you want but I don't want to see you anymore." I opened the door to leave the study.
"You are not going anywhere." He said.
"Watch me." I challenge. I am very angry right now. You better not mess with me!!
Before, I could even take a step out, he banged the door shut from behind me. I turn around furious at him. "You are not stepping out of this house without protection and until we know who shot at you, I am not letting you stay anywhere else." He said. There was no argument, it had a tone of finality. Well, screw you!
"I'd rather die than stay with you in this house." I snapped at him.
He stared at me, into my eyes directly, and I remembered what I told him last night, in this very room. I had assured him that I wouldn't be safer anywhere in this world other than here, with him. I know he is thinking the same thing. But, I have zero sympathy for him. His expressions quickly changed, his eyes were starting to go red and he looked like he was in pain, like I had cut out his limb out or something. He tore his gaze away and it seemed like he was gathering as much conviction as he could into his voice. "You don't have an option Manvi. I can't risk the life of my kids." He said.
"We will go back to India." I explained totally stunned. He cannot be serious.
"They could follow you." His tone was indifferent. He is all CEO-ish now. Well, I am not his freaking employee. I am a free citizen and I can do whatever the hell I please to do.
"There's got to be another way. I will request police protection." Frankly, this whole thing had gone out of hand. I didn't think I would be jailed inside the four walls of this house because of that incident.
"I don't trust them." He continued with the same tone. I stared at him. He wasn't looking at me.
I thought for a second. Rationally speaking, he did have a point. I don't think I should take any step that will endanger the life of Nikki and Ria. "How long is this going to take?" I ask, considering his majesty's orders. I should probably stay until he resolves the issue.
"All I can say is I can't wait to lay my hands of that son-of-a-bitch who wants to harm my family. After that, you can go. I won't stop you. Frankly, I don't think our relationship will work until you trust me." He said. He wasn't looking at me anymore while saying this. He moved away and walked out of the study leaving me in deep thought.
Wait a minute. He is the one angry with me!!!?!!!!?!!!?!!!! He is the one hurt? He is the one in pain!? This is the mother of the all ridiculous things in the world put together.
~~~
I was looking outside the window from the kids room. I didn't want to go inside that room with Virat. The entire sky-line was visible from the window, tall buildings lined up. Night time each floor appeared as a tiny speck of light. There must be thousands of people living in those buildings. Is everybody's life this complicated?
I had this image in my head from when I was young, from before my parents died. I think it was winter time and me and my mom were sitting around a bon-fire in the backyard of my house. My dad was making sandwiches for us on the grill. We were chattering away, laughing and eating the sandwiches my dad made and when it became colder, we went inside and snuggled up listening to my mom's stories. I felt so safe, so happy and so loved. We weren't rich, we had a small little house and both my parents worked. But those few memories I did have, there was so much love, understanding and trust between my parents. I didn't want anything more than that.
When I married Virat, I didn't aspire for money or luxury, he did. I just wanted a sense of belonging, like I had with my parents. I thought that we would be this crazily-in-love couple, no matter how old we get. We would have two kids and our own little bubble and nothing could enter our lives, the love that we shared with each other would be our shield. Virat would come home and I would be waiting with our kids, we would have dinner together, old-fashioned way, talk and laugh about our day. Is that too much to ask?
Frankly, I never thought I would ever see Virat again. He would have moved on, I figured. But, seeing him after all these years, seeing his anguish and pain, somewhere deep in my heart, a small hope had crept up; that maybe I was mistaken, maybe all of this was a horrible nightmare. How can this Virat, who sees nothing but me, who wants nothing else other than me, betray me? How can he even think about touching someone else?
It was so hurtful when he said he had used women for sex. I tried my level best to reason for him. I put myself in his place. They told him that I died, that he had to move on in life and that was what he was trying to do. But, he couldn't. For godsakes, I couldn't even move-on in life, even though I knew that my love had broken and I had with me two beautiful kids whose future I could look forward to. How can I expect him to be all okay and go about his life sane and stable?
My mom once told me: when someone suffers from an extreme emotional distress, they resort to extreme methods to cope with that pain. I tried to convince myself that that's what has probably happened with him. I made excuses and argued with my conscience- he loved me to bits, he couldn't handle my loss, he walked over to the dark side of life. It is not like he had married someone else or was trying to get to know other women. He was burning in desolation. He was trying to smolder the pain, decrease it somehow. He didn't know how to. He was hurting himself.
Why, oh why did I keep making excuses for him? Why did I convince myself that things are not always perfect and that the most important thing is that we still love each other?
This is so dysfunctional!
Why am I hit at the same sore spot again and again? Right now, I wish I never survived that car-crash that night, it would have been the end of everything.. of me and also my never ending heart-ache. I am drained, I feel like how I felt that night- exhausted and blank. I saw everything with my own eyes, how can it not have been true?
I cannot be with him anymore, it would be a disrespect to the person I am. I need to move away from all these thoughts. These are nothing but hurtful and an effing waste of my time. I need to bury them permanently. I cannot let Virat see how broken I am. If I have to distance myself from him, I need to appear strong and in-control. I so need a friend right now. I feel like talking with Swetha but then she is going to say I told you so.
I pull myself together, all the million bits and pieces of my broken self and I look at the kids.
"Momma, when is dad going to come home?" Nikki asks me. It is 9 in the night and I haven't heard anything from Virat. I think he had left for work soon after we talked in the morning.
"I don't know sweety. Come on you both, let's have dinner." I walk towards the door and turn around. They were still sitting at their small table.
"What's wrong?" I ask.
"But we are grounded." Ria says sadly.
Ohh god, they have to be the most innocent kids in the whole world. I don't know why, but my resolve breaks down and I have this sudden uncontrollable urge to hug them and cry my heart out. No Manvi no, you cannot cry in front of the kids. I go to them and kneel in front of them.
"You promise to be good from now?" I ask sweetly.
"Yes momma." They reply together.
"Ohhh, I am sorry my babies, I don't want to punish you. Momma loves you so much." I pull them close and hug them tightly. No matter how hard I tried a lone tear escapes my eyes. I really need to learn to vent some other way. I tell myself that I cannot go weak in front of them.
"How much?" Ria asks me. I stare at her for a second and then realize that she was asking how much I love her. I smile at her.
"I love you more than all the stars in the sky bunny." I tell her wiping my eyes without them noticing. She beams and her eyes are sparkling brighter than all those stars put together.
"Me?" Nikki asks me, eyeing Ria in envy. I smile shaking my head. My little cutie pies!! They always manage to brighten my mood.
"More than all the shells in the ocean buddy." I tell him and he claps his hands grinning widely jumping around the room. He loves picking shells in the beach and he is always amazed and keeps asking me as to how many shells does the ocean exactly hide inside it. Infinite, I had told them once.
I take them out to the dining table. Liz was waiting for us with warm food. I couldn't be more appreciative of her as I didn't have the energy or heart to cook anything right now.
~~~
We are at the dinner table and I am serving them food.
"Where is daddy?" Nikki asks me.
I am annoyed. "I don't know Nikki. Eat your food." I tell him.
"I am right here buddy." I hear him coming from the living room. I avoid looking at him. Nikki gets up on his chair and holds his hands out for him "Dayddy!" he shouts.
"I missed your yelling and shrieking all day" He lifts him up in his arms laughing.
"Nikki, sit and finish eating." I tell him. He is too busy with his dad. "Momma loves me more than all the shells in the ocean." He tells Virat excitedly throwing his hands out as far as he can.
"Wooow!!" Virat mirrors his excitement. But his voice is unusually low.
"My turn..." Ria gets up on her chair holding her hands up for him. Great! Yes, don't eat. It's a freaking hugging fest.
"I missed you too my little princess." She wraps her hands and legs around him and he hugs her tightly, more than usual, closing his eyes. I flinch, without realizing I am clutching the arm of the chair tightly. When he opens his eyes, I look at him, his expression- it is making me so weak. It is pain, pure unadulterated pain. We cannot tear our gaze away from each other. "Ria, dinner first." I remind her, finally getting a grip over myself.
"Nooo" she sulks clinging onto Virat. And I know she is doing it to avoid eating.
"Sir, Mr.Shekawath is waiting for you." Randy announces.
"Yes. I know." He says.
"Karan is here for some work. Will be back in a bit." He tells me. I look nonchalant. He hands Ria into my arms to her much disappointment. His hands brush past mine briefly. I could feel him burning. I immediately clasp his hand without thinking. "Shit! Virat you have fever."
He looks at me, studying my reaction briefly. He smiles a little. "I am fine Manvi. I won't be long." And he is gone, again.
I am standing there looking at the kids eat and all I can think about is Virat. He is sick. I call Liz and ask her to stay with the kids. I fetch some medicine for him and walk to the study.
The door wasn't completely shut, I am about to walk in but I stop as I can hear the conversation.
"You are a very hard man to find these days Virat!" This is clearly Karan's voice.
"I wouldn't have it any other way with you." Said Virat. His voice was very cold. I am suddenly very curious. I have never been interested in Virat's work but his behavior with Karan seemed very strange to me.
"Ok, straight to the point, why have you cut funds to Shekawath holdings??"
Virat laughs loudly. "You don't want to act nave with me Karan. It doesn't suit your style."
"You f**king bas***d I have invested all my money in it." Karan shouts at him. I am thunder-struck. What the hell is going on?
"I wish I could say I am very sorry about your loss but honestly, I am not." Virat voice was beaming with arrogance and contempt.
"You don't want to mess with me Virat. You don't even know the kind of dirt I have on you. I am fully capable to derailing your life. Think before you talk to me like this." Karan was warning.
Ohh my!
"I get to know of another move from you, you scheming son-of-a-bitch, I promise I will crush you so badly that you would want to hang yourself to escape from the pain." Virat retorts angrily.
Holy shit!!
"This meeting is over. Blanco! Throw him out." Virat is furious.
"Virat, I thought you were my friend." Karan's voice is suddenly soft.
"Friend??" I heard Virat laugh again, very loudly, in an evil sort of way. His voice was laced with hurt. "So did I Karan, I considered you like my own brother, until I discovered that you were planning to transfer all my assets to your new company and freeze me out of my own bank!! You thought I wouldn't notice, didn't you? You though Virat Vadhera is so sunk in his own misery that he will not notice embezzlement from right under his nose. Anyway, no point talking about all this stuff. It's all history now, so before I change my mind and file a fraud case against you, I would suggest you get the f**k out of my company."
"Our company." Karan corrects him.
"Not any more. I am going to oust you out in the coming board meeting." Virat is laughing.
"You cannot do that, I have given this company my heart and blood. I have nurtured it like my own baby." Karan's voice is so palliative.
"Yes, for that, you will have enough money to last you a life-time. But, you are out."
I decide I shouldn't be here anymore, this is all way over my head. Karan and Virat have a falling out, that much I could gather. I knock the door and step in.
"Manvi? you okay?" Virat looked at me surprised. He was sitting in chair before this large table and Karan was sitting in front of him looking furious. Virat gets up on his feet and walks upto me.
"Virat, I think you should take some rest, I brought you some medicine." I tell him.
He narrows his eyebrows and turns to Karan. "I think we are done here, I need to get back to my family. Blanco, please show him out." Virat says.
I nod at Karan politely and noticing this, Virat puts his hand around my waist from the side and pulls me close to him tightly. I feel the tension. I want to move away but there seems to be a kind of power battle going on between Karan and him. They were staring at each other implying god-knows-what. Virat soon leads me out of the study and into our bedroom.
~~~
"Thank you. But, I am fine. I don't need any medicine." His voice is cold towards me too.
"I don't care, just take the medicine, I will be out of here." I reply. I have a lot of questions about Karan. But, it's not my place to ask him.
"Please Manvi. You know how much I detest taking medicines. They make me puke. And I thought you weren't talking to me." he eyed me curiously.
"I am not. I just don't want you sick because of me." I fold my hands, but I don't back-off.
"I am not sick because of you. Whatever gave you that idea?" He asks.
"Well you were acting victimized and hurt in the morning. When in reality I am one supposed to feel all those things. You act so weird and out of context." I reply.
"Out of context?? Ohh, now you are going to tell me how to behave in a particular context?" He asks me, acting all taken-aback.
"No, that's not what I mean." I try to ditch the topic but I couldn't think about anything else. I don't want to debate, I just want to shove the medicine in him and get out.
"Well, I don't care what you mean. Firstly, I wasn't acting hurt. I am hurt, terribly. You don't trust me. That is very disappointing." He states.
What the f**k!!!
"For crying out loud Virat, what would you have done if you were in my place. When you had seen and heard the things I did." I ask. I mean he is a pretty smart guy, how can he not understand my point-of-view??
"Manvi, I would be very angry ofcourse, but I would talk to you, and if you said you didn't do it..then you didn't do it. I would trust you blindly one hundred percent." He says matter-of-factly.
"It's easier said than done Virat. I am not that magnanimous." My voice has a clear shock-factor!! He cannot expect that from me. Nobody can expect that from any sane person.
"No, you are not and you don't have to be. You only have to love me unconditionally, if you do, all this will not matter. It hurts me that you don't trust me Manvi. Somebody is trying to hurt my family life, I don't know who. It's a fact. I have been framed, ruthlessly framed. And I will find the culprit and break his gut but these kinds of things will happen to me again, and again. I cannot beg and plead for you to trust me all the time. And until you trust me completely, I think we need to stay apart."
"You are telling me to stay apart?" my jaw drops open.
"Yes, I don't want you out of the house ofcourse, but I will move to the bedroom beside my study. You can stay here."
"YOU ARE ANGRY WITH ME?? AND 'YOU' WANT TO STAY APART FROM 'ME'?? AND I NEED A LESSON IN TRUST????"
"Yes. I would like you to believe me, inspite of everything." He tells me all authoritatively.
"Eat the tablet." I scowl at him.
"No." he pleads.
"Eat the f**king tablet Virat!!!!" My voice blowing the roof of the house.
He looks at me like I just knocked out the wind from his lungs. He takes the tablet and gulps a glass of water without taking his eyes off me. I am so angry I can literally snap his neck but I control, I will wait until he gets better.
I throw his t-shirt and pyjamas on the bed. "Change. You are sleeping here today. I don't care which wh**e's bed you sleep in from tomorrow but you are resting here today and I am looking over you until you get better." I tell him continuing the same tone.
He doesn't argue. I wonder if he is quiet because he is scared of me or because he getting worse. I step upto him and he is doesn't move. "Virat.." I touch his shoulder and he slumps down on the bed.
"Hey, you alright? Should I get a doctor?" I ask. I start to panic.
"No, I am going to lie down." He says.
"Ok." I change his clothes and decrease the temperature in the room.
"Virat.." I sit down beside him. "Did you eat anything? Are you hungry?"
"No." he mumbles.
"No, you didn't eat or no you are not hungry?"
"Nooo." He replies. He doesn't want to talk about food. Period.
I go and get a bowl of soup and feed him. He ate a little bit. He must not have had any lunch. I am suddenly all saddened. I hate to see Virat like this. I can live with a crazy Virat, a dominating Virat, a frustrating Virat, an unreasonable Virat but a weak Virat is something I just can't see.
He fell asleep soon after. I wake him up to give him medicine every three hours and I keep wiping his face with a cold cloth to reduce his temperature. He was murmuring something all night. I think I understood a few things. "don't leave me..love you so much baby.." and the other works, designated to melt my heart, but none of them leave any impact on me. However, I was glad that the temperature was coming down slowly.
~~~
Its morning time and Nikki and Ria are up, playing in the room, waiting for their dad to wake up. They wouldn't leave without talking to him. I gave up trying to convince them.
Virat slowly opens his eyes, I had just checked his temperature and it was back to normal. "Hello.." he whispers to me.
I don't reply. "How are you feeling?" I ask.
"Drugged" he says. Talk about gratitude!!!
"Last one." I hand him another tablet. He looks at it with a disgusted face. Ria and Nikki climb up and join him and they commiserate with their looks. "I am going to take this one for you munchkins." He tells them and gulps it down.
"Nikki, Ria, what did I say about not disturbing daddy?" I warn them but Virat was nodding to them, signaling them to ignore me. Alright, before I flip out, I think I need to leave from here considering that my job here is done.
"Momma said you have an ouch-ie.." Ria asks him. I am clearing up the room.
Virat is laughing "That's the understatement of the year sweetheart but yes, daddy has a big gigantic ouch-ie.."
"Where??" Nikki asks him.
"Right here kiddos, right here..." He is places their tiny hands on his heart and looks at me with a freaking puppy face.
I am aghast! He was fine and bearable when he was unwell and unconscious. Now that he is all better, illogical and frustrating Virat is back in action. And I feel like landing a big ginormous ouch-ie right on his ass. I glare at him and walk out of the room
~~~
ok..i decided to take the story a little slow. Is that ok?
Please do 'like' and 'comment'
And happy birthday to our rockstar ❤️
Edited by bluebolt - 12 years ago
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