His pain has no bounds

And when at last you find someone to whom you feel you can pour out your soul, you stop in shock at the words you utter' they are so rusty, so ugly, so meaningless and feeble from being kept in the small cramped dark inside you so long." -- Sylvia Plath, The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath

Today Saras had the two people right before him who would have shared his pain, if he had let them. Dukhbaa, whose motherly instincts knows how deep his hurt is and wishes she could take him in her lap, cuddle him and drive away all his pain like when he was a child.

A moment she says "Mein hu na" and his eyes lite up with hope that there is someone to love him but then he sees her hesitate, think and he is hit back to the truth. "mein ne akele rahna seek liya hai", yes he tells her I don't need your sympathy, nor your love, he has learned to live alone.

Kumud, who unknowingly hurt him kneels before him asking for his forgiveness. Her heart aches for the pain he carries, her eyes plead with him to share it with her and the tears flow down feeling his pain.

But HIS pain is too deep, buried inside for years with no soul around to share it with. A lonely life he had led, he didn't know how to bridge the gap with someone he used to love, he can't forgive anyone who stands in his path of pain and he can't love someone without feeling the pain. Every time Kumud tries to do something for him, he tries to hurt her, push her away but in truth he is actually scratching his own pain. He crushed her tears saying I have to live with this pain, I have learned to live with it and you will also learn. He told Dukhbaa the same and he tells her as well that he doesn't need anyone. He can't let anyone near him to agin break his heart and leave him alone.

But he doesn't know still that it is this pain that has bonded them, binds them unknownigly in a strange way. They hurt each other and they themselves are the medicine for each other's pain.

Precap - the fight for the survival of heart continues until one heart will reign over the other. 😉