ArHi FF! Gravity - Thread 1 - [Completed] - Page 24

I am sorry to be late, read this last night but was too tired to comment. Now it is becoming clear Khushi walked into the plan laid by Shyam and that may have forced her to act in that manner. It is also becoming clear, she has realized her mistake and wants to correct it. Now why it took her these many years to do that is a little difficult for me to understand. Then again different people handle matters differently and even if I cannot understand it, have to accept the fact for all her pragmatism, Khushi acted hastily and did not check the facts first. I hope she is not too late to fix things as she intends to do.

Chapter 10: Paradigm of waiting

Her eyes opened automatically as if her body was her own personal alarm clock. She turned her head to look at the clock besides her bed table and smiled when she saw the time: 04:56. She willed her body to move and so it did. Living alone had taught her one important thing: discipline tamed the inexplicable horrors of her own mind. Loneliness tend to throw you out into a cantankerous world filled with dejection and surrounded by gazillions of what-if scenarios so a routine of sorts was needed to channel the mind in a single direction. Running, yoga, meditation had helped her overcome the gut wrenching disappointment she saw whenever she looked in the mirror.

Back home, she decided a similar routine was in order given how her loneliness now seemed more pronounced and sharper around the edges. She didn't want to dig and read between the lines to find out the reason; it would probably alienate her even more. In fifteen minutes she was out of the house and on the street running as if her sanity depended on it. As her calf muscles stretched and burned, her thoughts flew automatically to the night when she met Arnav.

It was a week since she was home and she was yet to have the 'talk' with Arnav. He had politely told her that he would be the one to initiate the talk and would do so when he pleased. She hadn't contested it and accepted the offered deal expressionlessly. She knew he needed time to adjust to the idea of her being around before he could hear about the things of past so she curbed her restlessness. Her heart had danced a little when she came to know that Arnav wasn't married. She rarely received any updates from her family when she phoned or emailed so she had automatically presumed that Arnav had moved on. The selfish part of her wanted him to reach out to her but that part was immediately crushed and discarded in the bin. She didn't deserve that kind of kindness.

She didn't deserve him anymore.

The last time she had seen him was on the morning of their wedding breaking about fifty traditional rules in the process. In wee hours of morning, he had called her standing below the balcony of the farmhouse which was rented out for their wedding. It was probably the most clichd way to meet in the world and she couldn't help but sigh at the irony when she stood in the balcony and motioned him to come in. Tragedy was wrapped in clichs and she was being a mute participant. She couldn't even muster a smile when he had laughed merrily after stumbling into her room. She had started to talk about the things she had found out about their families when he simply slid a plain gold ring to her ring finger babbling nervously about happily ever after. Her mouth had clamped shut when he kissed the ring and made her promise to never remove it. She couldn't bring herself to tell him about the private detectives she had hired to find out about her mother. She couldn't show the incriminating photos the detectives had unearthed. Selfishly she had hung on to his kindness and endless love and basked in his presence.

She stopped running and collapsed under a tree when her lungs screamed for oxygen and her calf muscles burned in pain. If only she had told him then...if only...

You are a f**king coward, her mind sobbed in relentless torture.

She closed her eyes and took deep breaths to satiate her lungs. She lifted her left hand saw the gold ring; it was a bit faded and had lost the luster it had once possessed but it was a talisman representing everything she had once lived.

It gave her hope.

She jogged back home steering her mind away from her past, her family and concentrated on what she would do now that she was back. She was looking for a job similar to that she had before and wasn't too keen in accepting mainstream job profiles.

She walked home slowly thinking about jobs, NGOs when she noticed that the front gate of the house was open and a car was parked in front of it. Not paying heed to warning bells around her head, she walked inside with her head bent.

"How are you Khushi?" She heard the husky-soft tone of Anjali who had arrived with her husband, Shyam.

She felt her mouth go dry when she saw the two. She was honestly scared of meeting Anjali knowing how the older woman loved her little brother. There was an absolute bias when it came to Anjali's decision when it involved Arnav or Shyam.

"I am okay," she mumbled. She refused to look at Shyam and she could see that he was as uncomfortable as she was feeling. Good, she thought snidely.

"I came here to request you to stay out of my brother's life." Anjali said serenely. Garima and Pankaj looked horrified at Anjali while Shyam was the ever uxorious man in midst of company. Khushi simply met the older woman's gaze with equal fervour. When Khushi replied, her voice had lost the markers of acquiescence which she had been displaying since she was back.

"No." The monosyllabic answer said it all.

*****

"I found out what you asked for," Lavanya said walking inside Arnav's cabin. She slid a file towards him and sat on chair opposite to him.

Couple of days ago Arnav had asked Lavanya to check if Shyam's problem was genuine or was there a sullied plan in motion. Lavanya had spoken to her contacts and found the information Arnav needed.

"So, the problem is genuine," Arnav said feeling a bit let down. He felt a wrenching in his stomach for unnecessarily hurting her sister in this process.

"Read further," Lavanya said flatly. Arnav nodded and continued to read the file. Three minutes later, he slammed it on the table and started pacing.

"He is getting enough funds to deliver the promises he has made as a part of his agenda yet the funds are insufficient when it comes to paying off the bills," Arnav breathed heavily, anger rising in his throat.

"This is not the most original plan of making money Arnav and also that it's the most common one. But what is appalling is the brazen way he goes about it." Lavanya replied.

"What is he doing with the money?" Arnav, in all honesty, didn't want to know. It would only irritate him more and would rile up the next time Anjali spoke in her husband's defense.

"He is buying jewellery, expensive dinners, holidays, electronics and some really dumb investments," Lavanya said. "I don't have detailed report yet but that's the summary."

"I am only hoping that Anjali is on the receiving side of all this expenditures," Arnav said sardonically.

When Lavanya didn't reply, he whirled around. "Don't tell me she is not," He asked in sheer disbelief.

"I can't be sure yet. You will know when I know," she said standing up.

"Thanks a lot for this Lavanya," Arnav thanked genuinely. Lavanya shrugged.

"Why aren't you talking to Khushi?" Lavanya asked standing by the door, her back to him. She waited for a response but when she didn't receive any, she opened the door. "Waiting is a painful thing Arnav. It's like having one's life in suspended animation and not knowing the direction it would take. It's a paradigm of uncertainty and it's the worst possible place to be." He knew she was talking about him and her. She hadn't made her affection to him hidden and asked him how long it would take for him to move on from Khushi. His woolly answer hadn't deflected her and had continued to be his friend. He hated himself for doing that to her.

"I'll make a decision soon Lavanya," he said. He could see a slight drop of her shoulders and she nodded.

He had no idea what he wanted. And that was the worst possible place to be.