Twist Of Fate Chapter8 Pg 118 27/07 NEW! - Page 66

Old...sexy Arnav, my imagination is running wild.

Not here, but THERE, hoga appearance, *soon*?

Write down whatever you are imagining. ;) :D

And dunno...I have a cold and dont really feel like writing. :p

I'm writing MH and TOF side by side :P

Oooh!

And Get Well Soon! :)

"Sometimes when I look at you, I feel I'm gazing at a distant star," I said. "It's dazzling but the light is from tens of thousands of years ago. Maybe the star doesn't even exist anymore. Yet sometimes the light seems more real to me than anything."

-Haruki Murakami, South of the Border, West of the Sun

---

Khushi traversed along the edges of the clogged streets, tugging the hem of her saree above her ankles, trying to avoid the mud. Moments later, as she stumbled over the stairs to a crumbling building, a hand enveloped her own, effortlessly lifting her from the last slippery step, and making her land, softly on the grubby floorboards.

"What are you doing here?" Arnav asked his voice a little hoarse, surprised by her sudden appearance at the construction site.

Khushi looked up at Arnav, as his blazing gaze roved over her face, before finally coming to rest on her eyes. "You hadn't eaten anything…so…I got you food…," Khushi stuttered, looking at his almost dishevelled appearance, soiled hands and a thin layer of dust sprinkled over the black mop of his hair.

"Oh…you can keep it there, I'll have it after sometime," Arnav said, softly, a little overwhelmed by her gesture, pointing to the top of a large cardboard box. "You are eating, and now," Khushi said, so admonishingly, that he didn't dare refuse. But even before he could take the box from Khushi, she eyed his murky hands in disgust, opening the dabba herself, and seconds later a little piece of crisp golden puri wrapping in it a light yellow subzi, stood right in front of his lips.

Arnav gawked at Khushi for one whole minute, before his lips edged forward, moving a breath more over her fingers before gulping the golden morsel hurriedly. Khushi tried to ignore the tiny gasp that had threatened to come out, as soon as his teeth had barely grazed over her skin, leaving in its wake a scorching trail of tingling pin points of fire. There were a few accidental licks, that made Khushi's fingers curl up beautifully, his lips would at times skim over her nails, causing Khushi's eyes to dart hesitantly, but she couldn't bring herself to look at him. No one, however, knew if his actions were fortuitous or purposely done.

Khushi promptly got up from the creaking stool, as soon as the puris had finished, and within a second she found Arnav tugging at her hand. She turned, and saw her fingers placed right on his lips, as he placed a tiny, lingering kiss on her palm. He then, didn't let go of her hands, they stayed there for a minute or more, as Khushi wallowed in gratitude of the sudden intimate gesture that had sent her heart beating a little louder than before. A soft Thanks was whispered moments later. She gave him a curt nod that failed to be anything even close to formal, as she scuttled out of the crumbling construction site.

---

The second Khushi entered the apartment; she sought the company of the clattering plates and the overwhelming scents of cardamom and turmeric emanating from her kitchen. She could have went and locked herself in her room, cried her heart out, but she didn't trust herself to think. At least, not yet. Her hands shook, as she put the milk to boil, watching it slowly turn into shades a light, mellow brown. Taking the cup of tea, she went and sat down on the lone wicker chair of the veranda to the back of the apartment. She stared hard at the liquid hues of the tea, long enough for her eyes to tear up. Then she finally, laid back her head, closed her eyes, and let herself think.

She could still feel the lingering touch of his lips on the insides of her palm that somehow seemed exceedingly fleeting to her. She wanted this, didn't she? Wanted him to react, to love her like he once did, before. But then, she knew, completely that the love was very much there. Only the man had changed. Leaving in its wake someone, whose stance screamed of defeat, whose eyes, that had earlier, much earlier held every emotion ranging from blinding rage, to concern, and at times, playful mischief, now only held deafening guilt.

She had tried, hard, years before she had left, to make him understand that none of it mattered. All the wrong that had happened, was easily, naturally overshadowed in her eyes, the second he had told her that he loved her. People might say she was too forgiving. But then, that's how it was. That's how it had exactly been, always. His presence in her life, in any way, changed the dynamics of her being. His presence, made her feel protected, yet wantonly alive. But this time, it wasn't completely about her, this time Aashna was the reason.

Khushi saw a rickshaw pull up on the road in front of the apartment, and watched a visibly exhausted Arnav get off it and briskly walk towards the house. She sighed. It was a sigh that spelled of disappointment. Years earlier, Arnav would have always known when she would be secretly gazing at him. He would have turned, looked straight at her with that quizzical look, and something else, she hadn't been able to fathom ever. But maybe it had been too long, too late and maybe Arnav might have changed. Maybe he was no longer aware, or effected by her presence. A small voice in her mind tried to protest, but she swiftly turned away from the veranda and went back inside the apartment, effectively drowning that voice of reason into pools of resignation.

However if she had stayed a minute longer, she would have seen Arnav retreating his footsteps, and standing right below the veranda and trying to find the face that had seconds before looking down at him.

---

"So, Aashna will be a little late. She said she would be back by four. She mentioned something about dropping in at Rizu's place for some project. You know Rizu…her friend" Khushi told a slightly bemused NK, who seemed to be wallowing in silent laughter.

"Err, Khushi, I know clearly, who Rizu is. And…Aashna told me her entire schedule for the day, before she left. And if I remember, you were attacking her with your parantha at that time, during breakfast I guess."

Khushi wanted someone to magically scoop her from the dining area and lock her up in the privacy of her bedroom. But alas, magic and she didn't get along well, especially in the surroundings of a certain Raizada, sitting a seat away from NK, comfortably on her favourite couch. Looking anything but relaxed, and a little…happy.

Khushi didn't know why she said that. It was that very same voice from earlier, gnawing at the back of her mind to inform him as to why their daughter would be late. She half-expected him to spring up that question on her, but that would of course be foolish of her. It was way too early for any such reaction. But he did react, didn't he? Khushi's earlier embarrassment was mellowed down by heights when she saw that faint glimmer of acknowledgement, clouding his face, as she made her way back to her room. And then suddenly, he gave her a small smile, halting her in her tracks, way too abruptly. That smallest of smiles spoke to her of a silent promise, one she couldn't discern right then. She would though, many years later.

---

"Aashu…you're back early! Project finished?" Khushi asked Aashna, caressing her hair softly. She was slightly taken aback, when she just tugged her forward with her hands, and hugged her fiercely, burying her head into Khushi's saree. Khushi was startled, not because she wasn't used to her daughter's abrupt mood drifts but mainly because she felt her shake, slightly, but it was still there, and she thought she heard a muffled sob. "Aashu …Kya hua? What's wrong?" Aashna didn't answer for a minute before she got up swiftly and brushed away the moistness of her cheeks.

"Aashna…what's wrong? Why are you crying?" Khushi turned Aashna to face her, cupping her face and suddenly she felt frightened. Fright, because there were those days, like that moment, when Aashna entered into these isolated alcoves of her mind, refusing to let anyone enter through. She would cry for one, two days and the next day she would be as happy, as carefree as nothing had ever happened before. That moment, Khushi realized what the term helpless truly meant.

"Aashu, please talk to me beta…tell me what happened, please?" And the second Aashna looked up into Khushi's eyes; Khushi was struck by that look of immense hurt hovering on her daughter's face. A second later Aashna turned away from Khushi yet again, but only to let out whatever had been accumulating in her heart over the past few years. "It was Rajeev uncle's birthday today. You know…Rizu's dad," Aashna didn't stop this time. She let out her tears and the words she had never dared to ask till then. "Where's my dad Ma?" The question was uttered in a matter of a nanosecond, but it reverberated through the room, through Khushi's senses and also, through the mind, the very being of the one man, who was then standing right at the door that led to his daughter's room.

Aashna watched the very familiar tormented look cloud her mother's face, giving way to a sheer sense of vulnerability. And that moment, she stamped down her curiosity, her desperation and mentally berated herself for asking her mother, at all. She simply went and hugged Khushi, as tightly as she could.

---

They say, in the end, it's not the changes that would break your heart; it's that tug of familiarity.* Khushi felt tired. Exhausted by trying to hold things together, that couldn't be held. Tired of trying to control things that could never, be controlled. She was tired of denying herself what she wanted for the fear of breaking things that she could never fix. She alas, didn't know that they would break, no matter what she did.

Much later, at about eleven in the night, when she was walking through the garden on the backside of the apartment, Khushi found herself face to face with the one man she knew who had the innate ability to comfort her frazzled nerves.

And the second she looked into those eyes she was revisited with every moment that they had ever spent together. Those flashes of the past, tortured her, their intensity increasing with every passing day. It was like this train, that never ceased to stop, only paused briefly some times, to be triggered off with magnificent strength moments later. The air around them smelled of dried roses, and cinnamon. The scent of the damp earth, the raindrops still lingering on to the peepal leaves still hung on to the air. There was a burning in her, she felt on fire, combustible, acknowledging each step he took towards her. She felt her heart stop, no, not stop, but slow down, taking in the sight, absorbing in the feeling, the familiar shivers it had been denied for so long. And after a long time, she had that very familiar feeling seep through her, the millisecond, during which Arnav's lips brushed over hers. She felt the world, the whole of it, moving all around her, inside her, overwhelming her senses, making her feel as if she was floating. And the only thing that kept her from drifting away were his eyes, that were looking at her with a tangible tenderness, as his lips moved over hers, in a slow, deliberate pace, cherishing every touch, every caress, as her own hands raked through his hair. An invisible force connected them, holding them close, even as the rest of the world swirled and fell away, completely.

---

Much later, when they broke away from the kiss, Khushi didn't let go of his shoulders. She still held on to them, scared that her knees would betray her. And then he asked her that question he had asked her many, many times before. The question, which lay bare the evidence of his concern.

"Theek ho tum?"

Khushi nodded, meekly, not trusting herself to speak. They stood in silence, not knowing what to say to each other, letting the faint buzz of the cicadas fill up their ears. Much later when Arnav told her that they should go to sleep, Khushi still rattled by the kiss, with the blood still pounding in her ears, mutely shook her head and went towards her room. But then hours later a highly peculiar thing happened. Khushi simple got off her bed, and very discreetly entered the room adjacent to hers. Letting her ears get used to the drugging sound of his shallow breathing, she quietly sat beside him, her hand caressing his hair. And amidst her trance like endeavour, she slid down next to him, and letting her hands slide down along his waist, resting her face over his back, she promptly fell asleep beside Arnav.

---

*Jennifer E. Smith, The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight

*Edited

You start the chapter with a quote from my favourite book by one of my favourite authors! So yay for that. :)

I dont know why but this para is just stunning!

Specially that bit about her fingers 'curling beautifully'...the imagery they create! WOW! I love your writing precisely for that reason - the images they create with each sentence and phrase and paragraph! :)

And to answer the last part - I think he did it purposefully. ;) :D

Why, you ask? Well, he did kiss her fingers, didnt he? And she realizes the above too because the nod was far from 'formal'...YAY! :D

The whole part where she finally allows herself to assess Arnav and what just happened is heartbreaking and the reader in me just wants to shake Arnav and show him how his guilt is not making her feel any better, just worse! She needs her old Arnavji back, not this defeated person!

And why should he just continue to be selfish of a different kind now?! Earlier he was selfish because of what he thought he wanted and now because of what he thinks she wants! WHY NOT LET SOMETHING ELSE THINK WHAT THEY WANT FOR A CHANGE?!

*Rant over...maybe*

*Scowls* :p

Why do they not wait for the other ever?! Ek second wait kar leti Khushi jab itne saal kiya hai toh dekh leti ki he still is affected by you, you sill girl! GAH! :/

This was so much written in such a tiny paragraph! The emotions, the silent words, the promise not only of the present but of a future too (last line)...beautifully done!

The part with Ashna was heartbreaking as well as heartwarming. Heartbreaking for obvious reasons - she deserves to know about her father but Khushi cant be to blame and also because Arnav witnessed it all and heartwarming because she is so much of an amalgam of her parents - crying one second, comforting the next - strong and focused, willing to let go of her own pain so as to comfort someone else.

And then the kiss...wow. No words.

*Wipes away tear*

Remember that talk we had about how this chapter was going to be heartbreaking but then I said it was going to be heartbreaking but a path to a life together...the kiss made me feel that may just come true. :)

Beautiful chapter, Sona. Great job.

PS - Really sorry for the late edit.

Wow Sona what an amazing update!

No words can describe how much I loved this update! The fact I read it twice made me cry, I feel for Khushi she can't help but cry and the fact Arnav was there and he kissed her fingers! Sigh!

I wonder if it would be all okay between them

It was nice to read Khushi consciously walking to Arnav's room and falling asleep there!

I loved it and I'm glad I got the second place ;)