FF : " My Stalker/ Uncontrollable Feelings" Chapter 20 : That's why I hated men ..
Part 1 :He decided to talk to catch her attention ..Arnav cleared his throat before he said : " Miss Khushi Kumari Gupta .. I will be the happiest man, if you accept to be ... Mrs . Arnav Singh Raizada .. my wife " He said with all love and honest in his eyes ..
and he was waiting for her response ..
She was static in her place even after 2 minutes ..He already was nervous, and her silence made him more nervous .. he didn't know what he should do or say now..
he toke her hand, and put the ring's box on her palm , and he stood up ..
Arnav: " I.. I know you are surprised Khushi , but I just realize that I only have one month , and I don't want to back to Delhi without you .. I want to take you with me and live with you you forever ... "
He smiled and continued : " I also know that marriage is a big decision to take, and our families should be involved in this matter .. so don't worry Khushi .. After accepting the ring, I will know that you want to be with me forever .. then, we will talk about it in more details, and My family will came her and will ask for your hand from your family .. "
He walked away from her to the lake's fence, .. he continued : " You cannot imagine how happy Di and Nani will be when I will inform them that I decide to marry .. Specially Di .."
He grinned at him self as he felt that he was talking too much, and he knew that this too-much-talking was due to his both nervousness and excitement .. he toke a deep breath before turning to face her ..
His smile faded as he saw Khushi several meters away; walking away from him .. he was about to call her when the thrown ring in front of him catch his attention ..
***
She reached her house and rushed to her room, and closed the door behind her ..
She sat in the floor, her leg pulled up to her chest, and she folded her arms around her knees .. and recalled how Arnav proposed her, and how she threw the ring and " runaway" with out saying any word ..
in that moment , She didn't realize what he said to her, and what he want .. The only thing she could see was the " Ring " .. The ring in her mother hand, still mean the world to her even after 10 years of what happened .. and when she imagined her self in her mother place, she couldn't tolerate it , and she runaway ..
" Isn't I'm the one who insulated him when I thought that he will leave me ?! Isn't I'm the one who couldn't digest the idea of him leaving me .. And , When he gave me the solution of being with him forever .. I reacted in that disgusting way ?! I threw the ring!!, and runaway from there without saying anything ?! .. "
Khushi cried more .. She didn't know why all this things happened to her today ..it was for her a " Fateful day " ..
She wished if he didn't return back today , if she didn't see her mother today in that status , if he didn't proposed today , or if she resist her unreasonable fears and shouted in her loudest of her voice " Yes .. I want to be you wife " ..
She felt a pinch in her heart when she remembered how happy Arnav was when he proposed her .. His eyes which was full of love, his warm smile that showed how much he was happy , and his speech which indicated that he have a lot of hopes and plans associated with her acceptance ..
And what she did ?! She left him there wondering what is the wrong, without giving him any response, without telling him why she threw the ring , and without know why she left like that .. She ruined every thing .. every thing ..
She toke her phone and dialed his number wanting to reassure about him, but in the last moment, she threw his phone as she felt that its not the right time to talk him ..
She wished if she could go back in time, and recover her mistakes .. She wished if she could go back in time to make her and his dreams true .. but she know, she couldn't ..
***
He entered his apartment , he sat in the nearest sofa .. He was unable to describe his feeling after what had happen ..
he was confused, disappointed, angry, and hurt ..
He did a lot of things, that he never imagine him self doing, just for her ..but all what he did , was a vain ..
When finally she accepted his love, and show her love for him .. She run away
When finally he knew that she too cannot live without him .. she refuse the only option of living together forever ..
When finally he wanted a relationship with a commitment .. she didn't wanted that ..
In fact, he didn't know what she want ..
" Isn't she got mad when I told her that I'm leaving permanently ?! .. Isn't she thought I'm like what she was thinking about men, when she knew that I'm leaving ?! .. Then why the hell she runaway when I proposed !? .."
"Every things were going nice , till I showed to her the ring .. What was she expecting from me ?! to be like this forever ?! to be in undefined relationship forever ?!"
He hated that when every time they came closer, she depart her self away from him .. It happened after their trip to Vegas , and again it happened today .. Every time he saw a ray of hope, it vanished , without knowing why !
He hated this feeling that he is feeling now .. he is feeling that whatever he will do to make her accept him and his love, it will crash with something and they will back to the squire one ..
***
Part 2 2 days later ..
They didn't saw each other, nor talk to each other .. Khushi wanted to talk to him, and explain to him why she did that , but she didn't know how to start with him after what she did ..
She cannot call him because she didn't know how he was feeling toward her after what she did, and how he will react .. And she cannot see him since its spring break which means no university .. She went to AR group in a wish to see him there, but also, she couldn't find him there ..
So, she decided to wait till see him again in the university or in the company, and she will talk to him face to face..
Arnav decided that its better to stay away from her .. he is already going back to Delhi after a month , and she refused his proposal ...
He didn't know how he will be able to live without her, but after all, he cannot force her to marry him ..
During these 2 days , he had a hope that she will call him and tell him why she did that ?! why she runaway?! and why she don't want to marry him ?! .. every few minutes on these tough 2 days , he was checking his phone continuously , in hope that she will call him and answer his question .. but unfortunately, she did not ..
With each day passing with her trying to talk or see him, his hope decreased, his anger increased , and his feeling s and doubts that Khushi don't love and want him increased ..
***
Khushi was Ishu house with Liza .. both Liza and Khushi were exited .. Ishu told her that she should come because she have a great news to tell them, and she cannot say it via phone .. she should meet them face to face ..
She told them that she is getting engaged this weekend .. Liza was very happy , she jumped in joy and hugged Ishu , while Khushi didn't said any word. She looked sad and absent minded .. Ishu noticed that ,and she walked toward Khushi and sat next to him .. She asked Khushi : " Why you looks sad ?! .. aren't you happy for me?! " .. Khushi smiled and hugged Ishu .. She congrats her and wished her a happy life ..
When Ishu told them about her engagement.. Khushi remembered Arnav's proposal .. He proposed in a way that any girl dream of .. If she accepted , she would be in Ishu place sharing the most beautiful news with her friends .. If she accepted , she would be as happy as Ishu was now , and even more.. but , she ruined the most beautiful moments in her life, by herself ..
The three girls sat and talked about Ishu engagement .. and Khushi knew that Ishu fiance is Aman, Arnav's assistance and friend ..
She smiled , and she hoped that Ishu engagement party will be a good opportunity to see Arnav and talk to him since he is Aman's friends and for sure will attend the engagement party .. she was very exited both for her friend, and to see Arnav ..
***
Khushi was in her room , preparing her self for Ishu and Aman's engagement party .. She wore an pink lehenga , and she opened her black long hair ..
She was very exited yet nervous .. exited because she will see Arnav after long time .. and nervous because she didn't know how he will act with her .. will he ignore her ?! Is he angry with her ?! will accept to talk to her ?! and will he forgive her ?!
She went to the party with her mother and sister .. As she reached , she started looking for Arnav by her eyes , she couldn't find him , but she continued her search till Liza came , and toke her to Ishu's room ..
After spending some time with her friend ,teasing and comforting her .. She return back to the party ..
She behold her mother and sister talking with a man .. She only could see the man back form, but she felt that she know who is this man, he was " Arnav" .. Her heart's beats increased with each step she toke toward them ..
When She was few inches away from them .. She heard Sonu calling her
Sonu smiling : " Khushi .. come and see who is here "
She saw him turning to see her .. He was smiling, and his eyes showed yearning for her for few moment , but then , his smile faded, and soon, his face showed anger and disappointment ..
She walked slowly to him .. while he turned again to her sister and mother ..
She reached to them and stood next him .. she asked him : "H .. How are you .. Arnav"
He turned to her, and answered firmly: " I'm fine ... and you ?!"
Khushi : " I.. I'm fine too "
He turned to her mother : " Excuse me aunty , I have an important call .. "
Garima smiled: " Its Ok beta .. Thanks again "
Arnav smiled to Garima and Sonu, then walked away from them .. Khushi eyes were fixed on him when he walked away .. it was very clear that he is angry and didn't want to see her ; and actually she cannot blame him ..
her mother interrupted her thought when she commented : " He is a good man .. Isn't he ?! "
Khushi smiled and nodded in agreement on what her mother said .. then she asked her mother what he was doing with them, and her mother told her that she saw and recognized him ..Then she , and Sonu went to him, to thank him for the scholarship ..
***
The engagement ceremony started .. Ishu and Aman wore the rings, the girls sang and danced ..
Arnav was trying his best to avoid looking at Khushi .. Seeing her cluttered his feeling , again ..
However, He was very angry , because what she did that day, and because she didn't try to contact him after that, as if she didn't care about him ..
Khushi eyes didn't leave Arnav a second .. She was waiting for any chance to talk to him..
Finally she saw him answering his phone, and walking away from the noise .. Khushi immediately followed him ..
***
He was in the terrace .. He was negotiating with one of the businessmen about some deals .. when he finished the call , he turned and he saw Khushi standing behind him .. he stared at this beautiful face that he missed a lot during the last few days .. and she too was staring at him with all regret, timidity, and love in her eyes ..
After few minutes .. he tried to walk away and return back to the party hall .. but Khushi prevented him by moving and standing in front of him .. He walked to the other side but Khushi again walked and stood in his way ..
He toke a deep breath and Said angrily: " Move away from my way "
Khsuhi : " I will not .. I want to talk with you "
Arnav clenched his jaw: " I said move away ?! you don't understand ?! .. I don't want to waste my time anymore with a hopeless case .. I already wasted more than 2 months .. Now , MOVE AWAY "
Khushi felt of insult as he said that .. but she was insist to explain why she did that .. she looked at him with a teary eyes : " Whatever you will say, I will not move away till you listen to what I will say "
Arnav angrily: " You could say whatever you want that day or the days after, I was waiting for you .. but now, Its too late Khushi .. ..and .. and you don't have to justify anything .. After all its your life, and also, I don't care about you any more , I hate you .."
Khushi closed her eyes tightly and she let the tears flow form her eyes, she know that he didn't mean what he said, but hearing these words from him, hurt her ..
He hated himself for saying that, he couldn't see her crying like that, but he also, couldn't do anything to comfort her .. he too was injured..
He walked away , leaving her with her tears .. but he froze when he heard her saying "
But I love you !"
He turned to her while she still didn't turned to him ..
She toke a few steps to the terrace's fence and said : " I know you hate me now.. and I cannot blame you .. "
She tried wiped her tears : "But.. but I want you to know ... that day when you .. proposed , I saw my mother staring at her engagement ring .. her engagement ring to the person who ruined her life .. to the person who after taking what he want from my mother, left her with out thinking about her , or his own daughters .. "
***
Part 3 She didn't know if he was listening to her, or he left her alone, but she continued with tremulous voice :
" My father was a perfect husband and father .. we were a happy family .. All the problems starts that day, when my father told us that he has a problem in his kidney, so he cannot work anymore ... My mother supported him; she sold all her jeweleries expect her mangalsurt and engagement ring , and she work as a tailor and servant just to make him rest and provide us with money to live ...
He was taking all the money and said that it was for his Kidney's treatment .. we had spend many days without any food, but we never complained since his health was more important for us than anything else ... after that , he told us that he need a kidney to survive , or he will die ..
My mother didn't give it a second thought ; She said that she is ready to donate her kidney for him ... The next day he took her to a strange place doesn't look like a hospital; and they didn't do the common check-ups before transferring her kidney , but at that moment she couldn't think about anything expect his health ...
They toke on of her kidney, and when she woke up .. she found her self in a different hospital .. she asked the nurses what she is doing here , and they told her that they found her lying unconscious in front of the hospital , and her health was in very critical status... She asked about my father, and they told her that no one came to visit her ...
Me and Sonu spent three days in our house alone .. without our father mother .. we didn't what happened to them ... we didn't find anything to eat ,and we didn't know anything about our parents .. we were scared , and we cried a lot .. in that days I thought that it was the worst days of my life and I cannot face anything worst .. but I was wrong .. it was just the starting "
She toke a deep breath and continued :
" My mother returned back to us in a very bad status ; she escaped from the hospital because she didn't have a money to bay the bill ... she didn't care about her self, she was concerned only about my father and where he is , She was thinking that my father was kidnapped or in some trouble , and that why he didn't came till now ...... her health became worse with every passing day ; no medical caring , no proper food to eat, nothing ... She didn't have anything sold and earn money to buy the basic thing to live , expect her engagement ring .. when I suggested to her to sold it, she slapped me .. she said that she will die before selling it .. we couldn't pay our house rent so my mother asked her brother for a help , he came and toke us with him to his house .. and from the first day, he treated my mother as a servant .. he didn't care about my mother health and bad condition; he only obeyed his mean wife demands ..
My mother was facing a difficulty to do basic thing such as going to the bathroom, then how will she be able to do all housework!! .. he didn't care, and he threaten her that if she didn't, he will expel us from his house ..
I was 12 years, and I insist to my mother to rest herself and I will do the house work .. I was doing the house work , I was very active and full of energy , and when my unlace saw me .. he started to send me to different houses to work as a servant in specific time of the day to get some money; without my mother knowledge .. and "She cried more and continued :
" When I was working in some houses .. some men were .. harassing and touching me in a way that I wished if I was dead before facing these disgusting things .. I hated my self , I cried , and I decided to tell my mother ... when I informed her , she resist her illness ,and she toke us and we escaped from my uncle's house ... we went to her sister house which was in another town .. when my aunt know what happened to us, she and her husband helped us .. they toke my mother to the hospital, she get the treatment of her illness .. and they treated us as they treated their own daughter ..""After my mother recovered .. she went to the place that my father toke her to , she asked the people about that place and one of them told her that it was organ trafficking organization ... My mother was shocked, and she thought that they fooled my father and did with him as what they did with her ... she searched for my father in all hospitals and police stations in our town .. but there were no sign about him ...
After a month .. we heard that police arrested some members of this organ trafficking , and my father ... was .. was one of them .. My mother couldn't believe that, and she was sure that he was innocent, She went to meet them in the jail, and there she heard him pleading another woman to support him, and he said to that women that he did all these because of her ... My mother broke down, she became lifeless after knowing that...
Most of people there scorned us because of my father crimes ... We were outcasts in our country !..They treated as if we were the criminals , though we were the real victim of his greed ...
People also started hurting my aunt and her husband for housed a criminal's family.. My aunt and her husband didn't care and they were insist to support is, but my mother didn't like them to suffer in any way because of us .."
"My mother gathered her courage .. she asked my Aunt for a loan .. she wanted to start a new life, in a new place .. We came her to US .. at first, my mother worked as cook in an Indian restaurant , beside working as a tailor when she return back from the restaurant ..Our life start to back to normal, finally we felt that we are normal human, finally we felt that we are not criminals .."
" After a year .. my mother decided to study nursing to ensure the future ... She studied, worked as a tailor, and cared about me and Sonu in the same time ... She did all her best to make our life as other children; she became out mother and our father in the same time .. She tried to make us forget all what happened .. but .. but " She wiped her tears and continued :
" Sonu was very young when all this happened , so she could live her life normally, she didn't remember what happened to us , and we never told her about that .. she only know that My father left us and divorced our mother, but she didn't know how and why , she is lucky to not remember all that ...
But me .. I .. I lived each of these moments with my mother .. Many times I wished if anything happened to me so I can loss my memory and start again , but I couldn't ..
I hated men .. I hated them because of my villain father who didn't think of any one except him self and his want , who ruined our life and many other people's life , and who was the reason of all our suffer and torture .. because of my cruel uncle who forget the blood relationship , forget that she was his sister, and exploited her needs ...I hated man because of these men harassed me without considering that I was a child , an innocent child, they only cared about animistic lust ... "She didn't know how, but she was in his warm embrace, and between his soft , securing arms .. she cried , her tears were not sadness tears .. it was happiness tears .. she was happy that she finally shared her past,the past that she couldn't share with any one, even her best friends .. She shared this with one of the important people in her life ,she shared it with her love ..
Arnav softly, while fondling her back and her hair : " I'm sorry Khushi .. for what I said earlier .. and I'm sorry for reminding you with all that "
Khushi hugged him more tightly : " You don't have to apologize .. Actually , I'm feeling much better now , after telling you .. "
She stayed like that a lot of minutes .. and she wished if she can stay like that forever ..
***
She felt Arnav putting one arm around her waist , and the other arm behind her knees .. He lifted her and put her in the terrace's thick, soiled fence .. She was surprised and scared.. She stapled her hand around his neck .. while he leaned toward her, his elbow resting on the fence and he was rounding her back with his arms ..
she looked at his face , he saw him smirking .. She noticed his almost puffy and red eyes, which indicated that he cried while she was telling him about her past, .. She didn't want to embarrass him by commenting on that ..
She asked him while pulling herself closer to him : " A .. Arnav .. W .. What you are doing .. let me come down "
Arnav smirking : " I will .. but after saying it again "
Khushi opened her eyes and moth and said in pleading voice : "don't tell me that you want me to repeat my life story again ?! "
Arnav laughed at her expression : " No .. I don't mean that "
Khushi relaxed: "So what you mean ?"
Arnav neared his face to hers' and he rested his forehead against hers' : " Say the three words that you said , when I was about to leave the terrace "
Khushi was trying to remember what she said , and when she remembered , she blushed and looked down ..
Arnav in his husky voice: " I'm waiting Khushi "
Khushi was silent for few moments and finally she decided to say it ... She whispered : " I love you Arnav ... I love you "
***
Chapter 21 : Blind Trust - Pg 43 ====
* Sorry for mistakes Thanks a lot for all your comments & likes in the previous Chapter..
Sorry for the late update ,, and I hope that you liked this Chapter ..
Waiting for your opinions, comments, and likes ..
for PM of further update, Buddy me after liking & commenting Edited by .A.l.i.a. - 12 years ago
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