I'm coming off my rant devi mode for a while to wear the cap of a devil's advocate.
Here's a disclaimer - this post is in no way a justification for Arnav's actions. This is me merely trying to look into Arnav's (and the writers') mindset.
Disclaimer 2- This is long. When I start writing, I write. A lot.
If I had been writing a fiction revolving around Arnav, I would have developed his character better. But having said that, Arnav is the most intriguing and alluring character I had come across a television show and had been remarkably well sketched for a television hero.
The story writers have tried to make Arnav come off as a man with a lot of issues, insecurities and abnormalities. That's the starting point of his character portrayal. He's far from being the typical quintessential hero and him being in love with you will not make your life easy. It's just the way he is. You'll have to deal with it.
Right now he's resembling Heathcliff of Wuthering Heights; a man so crazily and destructively in love that he's managing to hurt the woman he's in love with.
I was reminded of a line of Mr. Rochester of Jane Eyre when he asks Jane, "Am I cruel in my love?"
The truth is he is. But it's springing from deeply etched personality deficits residing in him. Does he mean to hurt her? I don't think he does. If not, well then he's definitely not a man in love.
But I'm going to go with the assumption that he loves Khushi.
I feel that the writers are trying to show a man who has a very warped, twisted sense of showing his love. It could be because of the fact that he doesn't know how to love a woman (I'm not talking about the sisterly affection he displays on Anjali. That's a different kind of emotion and he's well versed to it because he had loved his sister all his life. But loving a woman on a more primitive scale is different and he had never been accustomed to it before).
And he never came off as an empathic man. He cannot (or rather, don't know how to) put himself into Khushi's shoes until she spells it out. Until she tells him that she's hurt, he'll not understand it. Again, it's just the way he is.
Now, we have all seen that Arnav is domineering and he likes to be the one calling the shots.
He's also very emotional (yes he is. Watch a few episodes after he comes across that infamous terrace scene) and coupled with his dominating nature and his emotional insecurities; the fact that he might loose the woman he loves makes him almost savage.
From what I have grasped, his actions are of a man who's desperate and terrified that she'll leave her. Right now, he's going by the line 'Desperate times calls for desperate measures'. He's like a wild beast trapped in a cage (or rather snared by the new overwhelming feelings he has for a woman).
He puts up smug, over confident front, but it's not the case. He's actions are of a man with his head on fire.
At this instance, his better judgment of sitting her down, talking to her and explaining his position is left forgotten. His fundamental characteristics of the dominating, insecure self takes over to make her bind to him no matter what. It's a very primitive feeling. It's a possessive love.
No, he's not thinking of her or how she might feel right now. That much is obvious. One can almost say to some extent that he's selfish in his love. He's desperate to have her and he's forgetting the fact that he might be hurting her.
But that's just the way he is. It's ingrained in his character and it would take many years for him to come off this almost beast-like mind set.
If this is what the writers are trying to establish, then I must say I appreciate their efforts on trying to show a slightly psychologically imbalanced, grey shaded man in love. This is not said in a derogatory manner and most of the heroes we adore come off as slightly mentally imbalanced men, be it Heathcliff or Darcy or Mr Rochester.
Iss pyar Ko Kyaa naam doon? What do you call this love? Is this love? I don't know. But then we can't use parameters to define love or judge someone else's definition of love.
Looking forward to your opinions of Arnav, the man in love.
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