wrong way of telling the family

At the breakfast toasty told the family that some one told her friend that she has only 10 years to live and now her family is worried and sad. that's why everyone said they dont want to know if someone in the family is dieing. I think istead of that she should have said tha friend is suffering from cancer. Because if the family knew that person is sick, no matter how bad the situation is they will go for treatment no matter what. but toasty;s reluctance towards treatment is beyond my understanding.

Originally posted by: Chitrashi

My cousin is suffering from Cancer 4th stage and is only alive because of the continued treatment. When the doctors first diagnosed her, it was a typical filmy scene "you are too late blah, blah, blah".

I was so outraged that how can a doctor talk of giving up so long as the patient is alive and kicking. It's been 3 years since her disease was first diagnosed and the stupid doctors had given her only one month when we first went to them.

My thoughts, those who resist treatment are the worst enemies of their families. The person who is suffering will go after a few days, the rest will be left with a lifetime of guilt and regret.

On the other hand, the treatment itself is so hard on the body. It destroys all healthy cells in the body, the body bloats up, skin turn dark as though roasted over a slow fire, loss of hair, loss of nails and teeth. Digestive system goes for a toss, the bones become brittle, hands and feet have huge bruises due to puncture holes. After a while the patient can't stand up unassisted.

In any case immediately after a chemo session - there is huge dip in the health with excruciating stomach cramps, nausea, indigestion, general weakness. Risk of catching the smallest infection is extremely high, since the chemo has just destroyed the body's immunity cells.

The treatment itself is extremely expensive and after all this it takes 45 days after a chemo session to find out, if that session worked or not and how many more would be required. In addition to all this is the regular injections and medications one needs to take for assisting the drugs given during the chemo.

She has two teenage daughters and is the sole earning member of the family. And she goes to the school she teaches in immediately after the chemo session so she mark her attendance and still be eligible to be on the rolls of the school in order to draw her salary and medical aid.

Why I shared this story - if Cancer is a killing disease, the treatment for cancer is equally if not more terrible on the patient. It is like damned if you do and damned if you don't.

Chitrashi: thanks for sharing your story. It takes immense courage to talk about such personal stuff with strangers. I, myself have a few close friends/relatives who have suffered or are suffering from cancer (one friend actually dealing with brain tumor) but it is hard for me to discuss there struggle stories. This is the reason why this track made me very mad when it started and I now have least interest in Toasty's way of dealing with it because every aspect of this track is meaningless and however hard we try to make sense out of it, it just won't.

Wishing many more years of healthy and beautiful life to your strong cousin.