Senorita presents,
~* Confessions of a CV *~
Note: The CV in the bellow piece is completely fictional; any resemblance to any other CV is purely intentional and not coincidental!
Senorita: Hello Sir!
CV: Hi!
S: Thank you for letting us in your office.
CV: *smiles*
S: So Sir, what do you feel about the success of the show?
CV: It feels great!
S: What do you have to say to the audience of your show?
CV: Keep watching.
S: Considering you write the dialogues for the show, you talk very less!
CV: *smiles*
S: Sir, what are those?
CV: *turns back*
S: I mean a lot of books!
*CV sips coffee*
CV: Haven't you watched our show lady? Those are M&B books! We are paid to read one book every week!
S: Can you give us more insight into the creative process? How do you come up with the scripts?
CV: We watch romantic movies in the day while the shooting is going on and write the dialogues in the night! Sometimes we run out of DVDs we write the script in the day too!
S: That explains the glimpses of brilliance in the show!
CV: May be!
S: Can you tell us about the kind of research you do?
CV: You mean surfing on the net? The only site we log on to is IF.
S: Why is that sir?
CV: See, there are three of us, one person to make sure that no OS/SS gets copied from IF, one person to twist some of the OS/SS and I am responsible for making sure that the serial never has any twist the viewers are expecting
S: Oh! Quite a job sir!
CV: Yes! It becomes very difficult to come up with a twist that all the members on the forum haven't thought of!
S: So, that's why you came up with the brilliant idea of contract marriage?
CV: Yes! No one predicted it!
S: May be that's why you felt the need of bringing in a "mature" 9 year old who is jealous of Payal?
CV: You are smart!
S: Wow! Sir! What logic?
CV: Logic! Don't you dare pollute our office with such a word, we don't even utter it! Ye jagah apavitra ho jayega!
S: Sir, what about continuity? Once you say Arnav was naughty as a kid and the other time you say he was arrogant!
CV: We are still deciding on that, and we never watch the show ourselves so we tend to forget!
S: But sir, there are people who watch each episode more than 100 times & find bloopers!
CV: God Bless them!
S: Why are there so many bloopers?
CV: Our editors are under paid, they vent out their frustrations like this!
S: Sir, don't you think you are banking upon the lead pair's chemistry too much?
CV: That's why we are ruining it now!
S: Oh! What about Shyam's truth sir? When it will be out?
CV: When all the fans give up watching the show!
S: Then what's the point sir?
CV: They will come back! We are showing only what the audience wants!
S: First you make people go away by stretching a plot and then you suddenly break the plot so that the audience comes back?
CV: Exactly!
S: How do you know what the audience wants?
CV: We log on to IF
S: Sir, there is another world apart from IF
CV: Yes! That is what you need to know. Pauses! *on phone*
CV: Hello?
CV: What? They are predicting that Shashi will wake up?
CV: Okay, I will change it!
CV: What were you saying?
S: So the members in the forum need to start predicting what they don't want to see, then you will write what they want to see?
CV: What?
S: Nothing Sir, why don't Arnav and Khushi confess?
CV: Even we have no idea!
S: Till when you plan to stretch it?
CV: Till SP says its time!
S: Sir, people are not happy with the current track, what do you have to say to that?
CV: We don't care if people are happy or unhappy; our job is to come up with scripts which deteriorate everyday.
S: Sir, do you understand your show has a different kind of audience? We are smart intelligent working women, we know what we want and don't you think you are underestimating our intelligence?
CV: No. We are not underestimating your intelligence! You are still watching the show!
S: So you mean I am stupid?
CV: *drowsy* nimboo ka acchar dedo!
*Senorita runs away*
PS: You guessed it right; I did slip in a little bit of bhang in the coffee 😉
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