Is Arnav capable of loyalty? - Page 5

Originally posted by: Marybarton

Yes, yes women love the bad boys and in the Fan Fics we like imagining Arnav being more rakish (casual encounters, etc) that I frankly think he is portrayed in the show. I have evidence. He says to Di that he has a girlfriend now, so what? It sounds like something new to Di and the family, as if he never had a girlfriend before. La says in her first scene that she met him five months ago, so it is a relatively young relationship too. Both dialogues hint at this being his only attempt at a relationship. Whether he had casual encouters before is a matter of debate. But one thing is sure, it takes a whole lot of effort to make a business successful by the age of 26 and does not leave you a lot of time for relationships.

So I would say Arnav is not as much of a player but we as readers like imagining so. He's just a normal guy more used to getting his way. He indulged in a relationship that he thought he could dominate but soon realized that is not what he wanted as he fell hard for Khushi. This is my interpretation of course. Whether he is a rake or not is not the debate I want to raise here. My question is about reformed rakes as loyal husbands. I have this problem of thinking from too many different angles when wondering about any topic and rakes are top in my mind right now 😆. So...do you think it is possible? Is is a huge trip to win a rake but how about keeping him? Here are some conflicting possibilities I have been thinking about:

1. If said rake had numerous meaningless sexual encounters before, what makes you (generally speaking, the girl he marries) so special that he won't stray? Say he has a few more meaningless encounters after marriage but says he really loves you and with you it is different.

I don't think that having meaningless sexual encounters has anything to do with how faithful a person is. Most people have meaningless sexual encounters because their lack of ability to connect with someone without this act, or they haven't met the right person yet. 

But I also would be wary of cheaters. Especially husbands who cheat on wives. But again, I don't think that is always correlated to if the guy has had multiple relationships or not. 

2. Do people really change? Why would a serial monogam-er suddenly before constant for his wife? Yes, love. But what about all these studs (think famous examples Jude Law, Brad Pitt, non-stars too) who stray after love? Clearly, I am having a hard time balancing out how loyalty would work here because he would have to change his attitude toward relationships for the wife. Say the wife was not a serial monogram-er herself in which case I could see more compatibility and understanding. Say she was Khushi and the rake Arnav.

I think people change in certain circumstances. However, I think people's core personalities rarely ever change unless something drastic has happened in their lives, especially when you're an adult. Again, serial monogam-er doesn't mean the guy was unfaithful to the girl he was with at the time. Many people date frequently - 5 or 6 different dates within a week, but that doesn't mean they'd cheat after they find a steady gf because for a lot of people that's how they figure out who they want. Or, even if he dated girl A for one week then girl B the next week, that has nothing to do with his loyalty or faithfulness.  Those issues would come into play if he's dating them both (more than casually) at the same time.  I don't think loyalty in a relationship has anything to do with having multiple past girlfriends. You can only be loyal to a person while your still in that relationship. If the relationship is broken, then both parties have free reign to move on. 

3. Alternate possibility: Rakes sometimes fall hard in love and do stay dedicated, it is not the bad boy who finally settles who strays, but the nice guy who looks for a new adventure. Same thing can happen with women too, but given that I am straight woman, I am talking about the men. 

The most best of husbands & fathers (speaking from being someone who knows a girl in this situation) can turn out to be cheaters. I think its worse when its the supposed good guy that turns out to be horrible. Same goes for women. It's not about their past or how many girlfriends they've had, etc etc. It's really about their character & values, & how dedicated they are to the relationship.  I for one don't think that having multiple past relationships means that you're flawed in character (as in you're a cheater, you're going to stray, etc) 

Not all bad boys are necessarily bad in relationships too & if they have soo many girlfriends, it just means they're quite talented with the ladies, loll. But I think there's a difference between that and cheaters. 

So at the end of the day. Is it all about putting faith in the other person and putting your trust on the line? A rake/bad boy has a lot of incentives typically being charming or good looking to women, so would you personally settle for one? Can you trust? These are questions I am wondering about now that I am writing about a rake and Anjali (part of my FF Avenging Angel). No one is making judgments, so please just answer from your own point of view without hesitation. If you have personal stories, even better. 😃

I could definitely trust a rake/bad boy, lol, it honestly depends on how he treats me. Just because he's a rake/bad boy doesn't mean he's a liar either. But I agree, it's all about faith, trust, and dedication to your partner. If you have that it doesn't matter if you're guy is a reformed man-s**t, a reformed bad boy or rake or just a good guy. lol.

I hope I was able to get my thoughts out clearly! Congrats on your 2000th post!! =D

2000th post!
Mary.