Nosy, Interfering In-Laws: A Bane or a Boon?

elle45 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#1
If there is one thing that MKAP has taught me, it's that I should be afraid, very very afraid... not of something scary, but I should be afraid of what sort of In-laws I shall have? 😆

Both the Thakurs and the Saxenas are very nosy families. They love knowing each and every personal matter between a couple, and they love interfering, demanding to know what's going on, and offering their own solutions. I didn't like what the Saxenas were doing today, but however, this interference will be beneficial for Komal.

Seriously, the only part I saw in today's episode was the last scene, where Pratigya is wondering why Komal had the ink on her thumb, then the whole family questioning Komal about it, and Arushi practically ordering Komal to tell the story behind the secret papers!

Now while this whole exercise will in a way prove to be beneficial for Komal (she'll find the truth out)... but it kind of made me angry, why was Komal being questioned like that by the Saxenas? If you live in a joint family system, MUST you share every little detail of your life with you in-laws? Does living together entitle them to interfere so much in your life? What if Adarsh really had bought a house for Komal? What if he had opened a bank account with her? Do a husband and wife have no privacy if they live with in-laws? Is this the reason why many couples chose to move out and live alone?

The Thakurs also love to interfere. They want to know all the test results, they want to get second marriages done, they want to know when the couple is together and when it is not. In short, whenever they interfere, it seems to be harmful for the couple.

I couldn't make up my mind. When you live with in-laws, it inevitably seems that they will be nosy and interfering. But is it a bane or is it a boon for the couple? What do you guys think?

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pooja-menon thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#2
Personally for me..I would prefer to live alone with my husband...meaning keep a good, cordial relationship with your in-laws but have a life of your own...

Maybe I feel this coz I have lived only with my parents...even my parents live separately from my grandparents..but as both my parents were working so everyday my dad used to drop me there in the morning and from there I used to go to school etc...and then take me back during the evening. ...This way we got our privacy as well as I got the love of my grandparents and our relationships were never strained.

Unless you have a very very understanding in-laws...which is very rare now-a-days...it can be problematic...I am not saying they always will...but a fair chance ...
Edited by ....Poojie.... - 13 years ago
hussainramso thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#3
Great topic Elle!
I've waited 1 1/2 yrs for someone to make this post.
It's never a boon!!
elle45 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#4

Originally posted by: ...Poojie...

Personally for me..I would prefer to live alone with my husband...meaning keep a good, cordial relationship with your in-laws but have a life of your own...

Maybe I feel this coz I have lived only with my parents...even my parents live separately from my grandparents..but as both my parents were working so everyday my dad used to drop me there in the morning and from there I used to go to school etc...and then take me back during the evening. ...This way we got our privacy as well as I got the love of my grandparents and our relationships were never strained.

Unless you have a very very understanding in-laws...which is very rare now-a-days...it can be problematic...I am not saying they always will...but a fair chance ...



We always lived separately as well, but I don't know what I would like. There are sets of ppl who claim that joint family is the best, and there are those who strongly advocate a nuclear family. I think I'd like an experience of both 😊

But all MKAP has done is scare me, 😆 seems like many disagreements/rifts between a couple stem from the in-laws and their meddling ways. It feels like a couple is happy in their own life till someone starts poking around in your affairs. I don't think I would like to live like that 😕
elle45 thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: Atticus

Great topic Elle!
I've waited 1 1/2 yrs for someone to make this post.
It's never a boon!!



Haye, you should have made this topic then 😆

@bold: Many ppl say that. I've seen a few marriages break-up in real life because one partner was way too influenced by a family member who poked their nose in every matter between the couple. But then again, wasn't it a boon for Komal today? Her marriage will probably be saved by Pratigya's interference. However, what use is it saving this marriage when Adarsh doesn't love her at all?
pooja-menon thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#6

Originally posted by: elle45



We always lived separately as well, but I don't know what I would like. There are sets of ppl who claim that joint family is the best, and there are those who strongly advocate a nuclear family. I think I'd like an experience of both 😊

But all MKAP has done is scare me, 😆 seems like many disagreements/rifts between a couple stem from the in-laws and their meddling ways. It feels like a couple is happy in their own life till someone starts poking around in your affairs. I don't think I would like to live like that 😕



I personally wouldn't want to live in a joint family...
It all depends on the in-laws...if one is un-lucky ..then it might be very hard to live together..😆
Snigdha_Khanam thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#7
good post😊prats was wondering about komal's thumb .there was some logic.prats know it komal is not educative that's why she was tensed about it.but if komal said that it's their husband-wife matter then she didn't interfere i think😊but arushi's behaviour was undigestablejoint family or nuclear family both has some facilities but problems will be there also for sure.The most important thing is ur bonding with ur husband.In komarsh case we can see that adarsh doesn't love komal at all so maybe prats will save their marriage for now but adarsh will leave her one day.
Edited by Snigdhakhanam - 13 years ago
Yemi-IF thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#8

Originally posted by: Atticus

Great topic Elle!
I've waited 1 1/2 yrs for someone to make this post.
It's never a boon!!

😆 😆
Yemi-IF thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#9
From my experience... nuclear wins out coz on the long run its much better for the BP 😛
MERARAI thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#10
Hmmm... I got lucky from day one👏. A weekend visit once a year both ways has finally come down to our visit for half a week once a year.

I've noticed among extended familes...the nosy ones find a way to stick their heads in and ask 20 questions periodically. They swallow their dissent like a bitter pill and vent their displeasure with relatives who will listen to them. The son or daughter who doesn't tell their parent (mostly sasuma) to give them space early on are the ones who end up letting their parents meddling in their lives beyond the average curiosity.

The rare good ones, live and let him and treat their bahus better than they do their daughters. They are few and far between.

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