Forgiving who and by whom

Originally posted by: delhigirl

DISCLAIMER: please do not come to bash me. This is what i feel and if you do not like it, ignore my post. I will really appreciate it

I wanted to see who needs to ask forgiveness and who needs to give it -

1) Yes maan said harsh words to geet. but then geet also forgave dev without even talking to maan about it and then allowed him to put color on her. Both hurt each other and each others self-respect - EQUAL footing for both

2) Both geet and maan lost the baby. They both had equal involvement with the baby, so the pain is also same - EQUAL

3) moving ahead in life after the baby was a logical step and both wanted it - nothing to do with dev - EQUAL

4)Geet forgave dev but maan never asked for it - DISCREPANCY

5) Geet wanted to start a new life by forgiving dev, maan does not think it was required. Infact both moved ahead in life when they married each other - so it was of no importance whether dev was forgiven or not - DISCREPANCY

6) According to geet, she forgave Dev because she did not want past to be there in her present. however, dev living under the same roof will only keep her past 24 hours in their face. maan always wanted dev to be out of geet's face - DISCREPANCY

7) Geet being able to forgive her rapist but not her loving husband - huge DISCREPANCY. i also do not buy the argument that she is unable to forgive because harsh words were said by the one person who mattered to her - I simply don't understand that. I will forgive any harsh words or hurt that the person who loves me the most in an instant, because he matters. I will never be able to forgive a person who did a crime against me esp. because he does not matter to me. he is not important.

8) Maan realising his mistake and going to all these lenghts to apologise - for me now he is in the clear. I do not think he needs to do anything more - BONUS

9) Geet not even admitting her mistake and not apologising for it😕

so in the end i will say that both made mistakes, who made bigger is anyone's POV. so both need to apologise and maan has done that. Now it is geet's turn to do so and then it will bring her on an equal footing with maan.

Yes geet has been a victim but she cannot live like one all her life and in the process victimize the only person who matters to her

Originally posted by: delhigirl

DISCLAIMER: please do not come to bash me. This is what i feel and if you do not like it, ignore my post. I will really appreciate it

I wanted to see who needs to ask forgiveness and who needs to give it -

1) Yes maan said harsh words to geet. but then geet also forgave dev without even talking to maan about it and then allowed him to put color on her. Both hurt each other and each others self-respect - EQUAL footing for both
Why does Geet need to discuss this with Maan? Maan took so many decisions without consulting her and that is fine because he is a man? I disagree. In a relationship what goes for the goose has to go for the gander.....meaning if one partner does something the other partner too much have the freedom to do the same thing.

Agreed that Maan helped her and went against his own brother for her. But the fact of the matter is he is Geet's culprit and what she wants to do with him is her call. Did she make the right call? Probably not considering she was suffering from depression following the miscarriage. Can you blame her for it? Heck no.

Dev wanted to apply color on her in front of Daadi and Geet has always respected daadi. Was she supposed to say no? Yes she was wrong to smile at him and I would have been happier if they showed daadi forcing her or encouraging her. But that was the fault of the CVs. STOP BLAMING GEET FOR THAT. THE TRUTH IS THAT THE CVs DROPPED THE BALL AND BUTCHERED GEET'S CHARACTER TO SUIT THEIR PURPOSES.

Maan has always had anger management issues and shoots his mouth before thinking of the consequences. He has hurt Geet many times because of this. Remember the time he tells her she is after his money when she first moves into the outhouse, he insults her in front of people so many times, he shoved her knowing she was pregnant, he said unkind words to her during the IP track, even recently he asked her if she married him for his wealth and comforts and then this was the final straw. Remember a woman who has lost a baby is not in the frame of mind to take the best of decisions. Maan should have taken that into account. But Maan has always reacted in a knee jerk fashion and ended up running his mouth. Geet has always been the one to get hurt. However, she has always forgiven him. But this time he went too far and she could not take it anymore. Would she have walked out at another time? Probably not. But coming so close on the heels of the miscarriage especially when she herself was very fragile, she decided enough is enough. Maan has never really respected Geet as an individual and he needs to start doing that.

2) Both geet and maan lost the baby. They both had equal involvement with the baby, so the pain is also same - EQUAL Agreed and I have been saying this from day one

3) moving ahead in life after the baby was a logical step and both wanted it - nothing to do with dev - EQUAL
Yeah but unfortunately no one gave Dev and daadi this memo. These two needed to come together and grieve their loss. But stoopid daadi sent Maan to work and stoopid Dev interfered between them. 😡

4)Geet forgave dev but maan never asked for it - DISCREPANCY
Huh? You mean Maan never asked Geet to forgive Dev? Why would he? Usko paagal kuthe ne nahin kaata hai 🤣 🤣 🤣......ok jokes aside Maan would never do that and Geet respects him for that. But Geet also expected Maan to respect her decision and therein came the problem. Paying lip service and saying "I will do whatever I need to do for your happiness" and actually following through with it and two different things. This is true in real life also.

5) Geet wanted to start a new life by forgiving dev, maan does not think it was required. Infact both moved ahead in life when they married each other - so it was of no importance whether dev was forgiven or not - DISCREPANCY
I disagree their relationship always had this Damocles sword of Dev hanging over it. Dev was always the elephant in the room that no one talked about. So they cannot build a true relationship until they move past him. He may not matter to them but Geet always felt that she was responsible for the break up of his family and has said that several times.

They had never discussed Dev after he was arrested. They never showed Maan taking any steps to get him punished. It is difficult to reconcile the character of the girl who wanted Dev punished to the one who happily settled down after marriage and was least bothered about him and worst of all with the one who forgave him. This is a royal screw up by the CVs who butchered Geet's character.

6) According to geet, she forgave Dev because she did not want past to be there in her present. however, dev living under the same roof will only keep her past 24 hours in their face. maan always wanted dev to be out of geet's face - DISCREPANCY

The CVs screwed up BIGGGG TIME. BLAME THEM AND NOT GEET.😡 😡 😡

7) Geet being able to forgive her rapist but not her loving husband - huge DISCREPANCY. i also do not buy the argument that she is unable to forgive because harsh words were said by the one person who mattered to her - I simply don't understand that. I will forgive any harsh words or hurt that the person who loves me the most in an instant, because he matters. I will never be able to forgive a person who did a crime against me esp. because he does not matter to me. he is not important.
Think about this - supposed someone who did not matte to you told you - "You are a good for nothing". You will feel bad but the very next instant you will be like "Who the heck is this person to tell me this. I will ignore them." 😡 On the other hand suppose someone very close to you, whom you love and respect says this to you - will you not atleast for one moment stop and think - "Is this person really telling the truth. Am I really like this 😭" So yes Maan's actions hurt Geet more because he is all she has. 😭 She does not care about Dev. Even if he dies tomorrow she will not be too bothered. 😆

8) Maan realising his mistake and going to all these lenghts to apologise - for me now he is in the clear. I do not think he needs to do anything more - BONUS
Sometimes you make a mess so big that just saying sorry does not cut it. Maan has hurt Geet many times in the past and yes Geet is guilty but of letting him off too easy. She always forgave him and he never had to work too hard to get her back. This time he has really hurt her deeply and he has realized but. But he needs to make up for all the pain he caused her. Just apologizing sometimes is not enough for forgiveness. He needs to convince Geet that he will not go back to his old ways of taking her for granted and will respect her and treat her as an individual. Her decisions will be given the same level of importance as his. Geet is scared of getting hurt by Maan and that is the bottomline. So she is hiding her heart which is already severely wounded. 😭

9) Geet not even admitting her mistake and not apologising for it😕
Yikes, I missed this point. More on this later. I am tired of all this typing and you are tired of all this reading. Both you and I need a break 😆 😆 😆

so in the end i will say that both made mistakes, who made bigger is anyone's POV. so both need to apologise and maan has done that. Now it is geet's turn to do so and then it will bring her on an equal footing with maan.

Yes geet has been a victim but she cannot live like one all her life and in the process victimize the only person who matters to her

Originally posted by: delhigirl