~~--jokes ki duniya--~~

Friend2: Kyu?

Friend1: Baar baar dikhaata hai "Battery Low" ab tak 56 battery badal chuka hoon!

friends Rahul and Rohan talking on the topic of the married woman,

Rahul: Wife ko begum kyun kehte hai?

Rohan: Kyuki shaadi ke baad uske saare gum husband ke hisse mein chale jaate hai aur wife begum ho jaati hai…

bahut milne wale dost rahte thay. Lekin ek din ek dost ka maut ho gaya aur policeinvestigate karne ke liye aaya aur uske dost ko sawal poochne laga…

Police: "Tumhara dost kaise mara?"

Sardar: "Pata nahi sahab, woh bola mere pet mein chuhe kud rahe hai toh maine usko chuha marne ki dawa khila di."

Teacher: Zameen par rehne wali janwer bacche deti hai, Hawa mein urne wali andey deti hai!
Woh konsi cheez hai jo hawa mai bhi urti hai or bacche bhi deti hai??

Student: "Air Hostess!"

Santa : I tried your number so many times, it always said 'Switched Off'!

Banta : Nahi Pape, it's my HELLO TUNE!

A family was puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother arrived from the US . It was sent by one of the daughters.

The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it when they opened the lid they found a letter on top addressed to her brothers and sisters:

Dear Chandrakantbhai, Arvindbhai, Smitaben and Varsha,

I am sending mothers body to you, since it was her wish that she should be cremated in the compound of our ancestral home.

Sorry, I could not come along as all of my paid leave is consumed.

You will find inside the coffin, under her body, cans of cheese, 10 packets of Tobler chocolates and 8 packets of Badam (peanuts) please divide these among all of you.

On her feet you will find a new pair of Reebok shoes (size 10) for Mohan. There are also 2 pairs of shoes for Radha's and Lakshmi's sons. Hope the sizes are correct.

She(dead mother) is wearing 6 American T-Shirts. The large size is for Mohan.

Just distribute the rest among yourselves.

The 2 new Jeans that she is wearing are for the boys. The Swiss watch that Reema wanted is on her left wrist.

Shanta masi, she is wearing the necklace, earrings and ring that you asked for. Please take them off her.

The 6 white cotton socks she is wearing must be divided among my nephews. Please distribute all these fairly.

Biwi: "Aap ne pichle saal meri birthday pe mujhe lohay ka bed banwa ke diya tha, Iss dafa aapka kya iraada hai?"

Shohar: "Iss saal uss mein current chorne ka iraada hai."

Sardar : What is the name of your car?

Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.