Do you agree w/ Jyoti's views on adoption?

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Is adopting out one's own baby a sin?

Vrish

@Vr15h

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 15 years ago

In last night's episode, as well as previous ones, Jyoti & her family had been prevailing on Sushma not to give her baby away. Last night, when Sushma mentioned her promise to the other couple, Jyoti told her that giving that baby away would have been a greater sin.

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B4KdkShu9Ms[/YOUTUBE]

What a turn-around. When Jyoti was working @ Sushu-mangal, it's role was taking care of orphans. But does Jyoti believe that parents who don't love their kids - unthinkable as it may be to her - should be forced to keep them? During her sishu mangal days, there was one episode where she persuaded parents of a baby girl not to adopt it out simply due to gender reasons, and she's been persistent in insisting that kids should be kept w/ their parents.

Do you agree w/ her that adoption is something only orphans deserve, and even dysfunctional genetical parents are preferrable to fully wholesome adoptive parents?

What say you?

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Mulan08

@Mulan08

Navigator

Posted: 15 years ago

Well, I have always held that it is indeed better for kids to stay with their parents unless the genetic parents are capable of harming the kid.

It is always better if the kid and his/her family know that they are genetically related. Yet exceptions occour all the time and I have myself seen instances where genetic parents have been terrible to their own kids..treating them as just an unwanted result of routine casual sex.

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Samirah Hossenbux

@samirah23

Inactive

Posted: 15 years ago

I know too many people who were adopted and have emotional scars when they find out that that they were given away - no matter what reason. A child is always better with his/her own parent.

Not to mention that I know a few women who have had to give up or who have lot their children, and the emotional scars are no less than the child they lost.

The only reason for adoption in my mind is if the parents have died.

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KajolKohl

@KajolKohl

Explorer

Posted: 15 years ago

Sushma should have aborted the child.This is harsh but at the time it would have been better because she's too young.Sushma was in tears, begged the doctor in that episode.I think more problems have been caused because shes decided to keep it.

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Felsbar20

@Felsbar20

Inactive

Posted: 15 years ago

No, giving up ur child is not a sin because if you think you cannot provide them a life that they deserve or there could be million other reasons such as u r way too young...etc.! But jyoti is soo capable of providing for her baby and she would be a great parent so i am hoping that she doesn't give her baby to that couple that sushi promised her baby !!😔

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Megha

@MeghaSRKLover

Sparkler

Posted: 15 years ago

i think a child is always better with their own parents too

all adopted children go in search of their real parents regardless of the reason why they were left for adoption in the first place once they realise they were adopted

so even if the parents who adopted the child were really loving, caring, supportive & basically what any parent should be like the adopted child will still want to know and find their real parents. its just like a natural thing

& that could hurt the parents who adopted the child at times

i knew this girl when i was in school way back who did the same and the parents who adopted her were heart broken becos she was set on finding her real mom even though she found out her real mom willingly got rid of her, wanted nothing to do with her

she even went to live with her real mom for a bit when she offered without giving a second thought to the other parents who felt their daughter betrayed them

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Megha

@MeghaSRKLover

Sparkler

Posted: 15 years ago

back to the story in Jyoti

sushma as already promised the adoptive parents the baby and they have been looking after her, doing things for her and the baby to show their gratitude

and they've also got their hopes up so it will be a little hard for them to take it in if sushi suddenly decides to keep the baby

they will end up feeling betrayed 😆

so its a tough one to go around, lets see what they unfold

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Vrish

@Vr15h

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 15 years ago

Depending on whether the adopted kid is a minor or not, I'd say that their decision to hunt down their birth parents is justified or not. If it is a kid, I can understand its desire. If it is an adult, not only is it ungrateful to its adoptive parents, but it's also disrespectful of the birth parents as well.

Not all birth parents adopt out their kids due to necessity - some do it b'cos they just don't want a kid, and in some cases, even considering abortion. If the kid in question was aborted, it would have been dead. Instead, its mother chose to carry it to term, and then hand it over to someone who'd really love it and care for it. These birth parents too have rights - and that includes the right to conceal their identity from their kid. There may be any number of reasons - mom had baby out of wedlock, adopted it away, and then went on to marry someone and concealed it, and is happily married w/ a family of her own. It would be nothing but cruel to her to forcibly 'out' her, potentially destroy her family and the adopted kid is not going to win her love that way.

The above is one legitimate reason birth parents wouldn't want their adopted-out kids anywhere near them. There are several others, including, say, the birth parents being dysfunctional, simply not wanting the kid in question, et al. Once a kid finds out that it's adopted, it should be thankful to the adoptive parent, and not try to hunt down the birth parent. After all, had the birth mom wanted, s/he could have ended up being flushed down a toilet.

Originally posted by: MeghaSRKLover
i think a child is always better with their own parents too

all adopted children go in search of their real parents regardless of the reason why they were left for adoption in the first place once they realise they were adopted

so even if the parents who adopted the child were really loving, caring, supportive & basically what any parent should be like the adopted child will still want to know and find their real parents. its just like a natural thing

& that could hurt the parents who adopted the child at times

i knew this girl when i was in school way back who did the same and the parents who adopted her were heart broken becos she was set on finding her real mom even though she found out her real mom willingly got rid of her, wanted nothing to do with her

she even went to live with her real mom for a bit when she offered without giving a second thought to the other parents who felt their daughter betrayed them

In Sushma's case, I think it's a major betrayal if she goes back on her word. Even if she marries Brij, she should go ahead and adopt it out, b'cos even as married, Sushma & Brij cannot take care of it the way Sarika & her hubby can. Once Brij is fully stable financially, and Sushma has completed her studies - which she should not drop just b'cos she's now married - they can resume having children in a more healthy environment.

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