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How to imagine a better future for yourself
Feeling unclear or pessimistic about what’s ahead? Your ‘best possible self’ is a tool for seeing things differently
by Dan Tomasulo, positive psychologist
Have you ever been asked about what you want and realised you weren’t sure? I’m not talking about dinner menus or plans for the weekend, but about life: where you’re headed, what you want to do, who you want to become. So many of us are going through the motions, showing up to our assigned roles, managing relationships, checking off tasks. The bigger picture might be blurry.
I see this all the time in my work, and I have felt it myself. What I’ve found helps, and what research backs up, is the act of deliberately constructing a vision of where you want to go. Some people would do this by jumping right to goals or to-do lists, but I’m talking about starting with something simpler, which is imagining what you would consider your ‘best possible self’.
The best possible self (or BPS) exercise was introduced by Laura King in the early 2000s, and researchers have found that it produces significant boosts in positive mood and optimism. It has become one of positive psychology’s most replicated interventions. It’s one that I’ve used, with some adaptation, in my own counselling work. I’ll get into the details below, but the core practice involves writing about your life in the near future, when things have gone remarkably well. The focus is not on someone else’s vision of success or what you think you should want, but your best possible life as you imagine it.
One of the things this exercise does is focus your attention. Many of us spend a lot of mental energy scanning for problems or replaying failures or disappointments. When you practise the best possible self exercise, you’re deliberately redirecting your attention. You’re giving your brain practice at envisioning things going well. People report feeling more optimistic as a result of doing this.
When you imagine your best possible self, you’re likely to generate some positive emotions, and research indicates that, aside from feeling good, these can broaden your thinking and increase cognitive flexibility. The positive emotions that flow from imagining a positive future could make it easier to spot pathways you would otherwise overlook and increase the motivation to pursue them.
Thinking about the future in this way can also crystallise what you value. It’s surprisingly hard to articulate what you actually want until you’re forced to describe it in detail. What does a fulfilling day look like? Who are you with? How do you behave? The specificity required by the exercise cuts through the fog.
My sense is that all these effects work together. You’re building a coherent, emotionally resonant vision of a future that you value. As that vision starts to take shape, decisions become clearer. I’ve worked with many clients using the best possible self exercise, and witnessed powerful changes in how they live. Someone who is offered a high-profile but misaligned project at work is able to ask: ‘Does this move me toward my best possible self?’ – and the answer is likely to come quickly. A teacher who wants to become a principal can move from ‘I wish I could lead a school’ to outlining several specific steps for getting there, spurred on by a concrete vision of the future.
Now, it’s your turn. Give this approach a try with the guidance that follows, and see whether it sharpens your thoughts and feelings about your own future.
Key points
Writing your ‘best possible self’ is a way to see the future anew. It focuses your attention on positive possibilities and what you value, and it’s been found to boost optimism.
Picture your future. Imagine what a remarkably good next chapter would look like – including specific moments and the character strengths you would show – and describe it in writing.
Reflect on what you’ve envisioned. Consider what stood out or made you feel something, and why that might be. Pick one piece of the vision and think about how you can make it more real.
Consider talking to this future self. An approach from psychodrama – switching chairs and speaking alternately as your present and as your future self – can unlock unexpected insights.
Refer back to your vision. Use it to inform what you do next, and notice when you’re being like your best possible self. You can always rewrite it as you evolve.
Picture your future
Start by choosing when and how to do this writing exercise. Some people like the ritual of spending a set amount of time with a journal on Sunday mornings. Others might prefer to visualise during their commute. The specific format matters less than how engaged you are. Setting a timer for 20 minutes may help you maintain focus as you write.
While a single session can boost optimism and wellbeing, the real power comes from repetition. Studies find that people who repeat the exercise regularly – each day for a week, then monthly or quarterly as a check-in – show sustained improvements in positive emotions and life satisfaction. Each session is a chance to hone your vision.
Set a time horizon for the future you’ll be envisioning. I’d suggest five years: far away enough to imagine real change, but close enough to feel relevant. You’re not planning out your distant future, just imagining the next chapter, a version of it where things have gone really well.
When you’re ready to start imagining and writing, get specific about who you’ve become. Don’t just write ‘I have a great job’, for example. Instead, you might write things like: ‘I wake up excited to work with a team focused on [a challenge that’s important]. I’m the kind of person who listens, celebrates other people’s wins, and admits mistakes…’
Here are some other suggestions about what to focus on:
Cover multiple domains, such as work, relationships, health, personal growth, contributions or joyful experiences.
Imagine specific moments in this positive future of yours. What does a fulfilling Tuesday look like? Who are you with? What are you doing that matters to you?
Consider character strengths. Ask yourself: what strengths do I imagine my best possible self expressing: curiosity? Kindness? Perseverance? Hope? This is important, because you can’t practise ‘being promoted’ today, but you can practise the strength of leadership. You might not be able to rehearse ‘having a great relationship’, but you can practise kindness and patience. Character strengths are the bridge between your vision and daily action.
Don’t edit yourself while you’re writing. As you think about this best possible self, your inner critic might want to interrupt with thoughts like That’s unrealistic, or Who do you think you are? Thank your inner critic for their concern, and keep writing. Realism can wait until later. Right now, you’re building a vision, and that requires permission to explore freely.
Here’s an example of what the result of this exercise might look like. A 30-something project manager might write:
It’s 2030. I lead a team of 12 at a company building climate-tech solutions – work that lets me sleep at night. When my team struggles, I ask questions instead of jumping in to fix everything (practising patience and curiosity, not my old pattern of control). I run three mornings a week, not to punish my body into compliance but because I genuinely like how I feel after. My daughter sees me set boundaries – I close my laptop at 6pm, even when there’s more to do. My partner and I have monthly check-ins where we talk about what’s working and what isn’t before resentment builds. I’ve stopped apologising for taking up space in meetings. I mentor two women from non-traditional backgrounds because someone did that for me. When projects fail, I ask ‘What did we learn?’ instead of ‘Who screwed up?’ I’ve built a life where my work expresses my values instead of conflicting with them. I finally believe I deserve the success I’ve worked for – the old imposter syndrome voice is still there sometimes, but it doesn’t run the show anymore.
Notice the specificity, and the character strengths woven throughout: curiosity, patience, leadership, bravery (in setting boundaries), kindness (in mentoring). It’s about who this person has become rather than just what she’s achieved.
Advice for overcoming blocks
Here are some other thoughts or concerns that might interfere with you getting started:
I don’t know what I want yet. That’s why this practice helps. You’re not supposed to know before you start; the writing reveals it. If you’re getting stuck, you could start with what you know you don’t want, and then explore the opposite.
This feels selfish. Think of gaining clarity about your direction as a way of taking responsibility. You can’t steer toward something you haven’t envisioned. And when you are clearer about your desired path forward, you might be better able to support others on theirs.
The gap between my vision and reality feels crushing. The point of this exercise isn’t to measure the distance between your current self and your best possible self. It’s a way of establishing direction. You might not end up realising this vision of yourself in its entirety, and that’s OK. What it does is present a constellation of qualities, practices and values that you want to weave into your life, starting now.
Reflect on what you’ve envisioned
After you’ve finished writing, sit with what you wrote for at least a few minutes. What surprised you? What felt obvious? What made you feel something, such as excitement, grief, longing or fear? These reactions could be informative. For example, if writing about running a team energises you more than writing about the promotion that comes with it, that might hint at how you feel about leadership versus status. Maybe something you wrote felt embarrassingly simple (‘I have plants and I remember to water them’), but your best possible future doesn’t have to be grandiose. Sometimes it’s just… saner.
When I’ve facilitated this exercise in groups, about a third of participants finish writing and immediately say some version of: ‘This is nice, but I could never actually have this life.’ If that’s you, try this: don’t ask ‘Could I have this whole life?’ Ask instead: ‘What’s one element from this vision that I could practise this week?’ Again, you don’t have to believe you’ll become an executive officer to practise leadership in your current role. You don’t have to be certain you’ll write a book to start writing for half an hour. Pick one piece of the picture and think about how you can make it more real. Belief often follows action, rather than the other way around.
Consider sharing what you wrote with someone who knows you well and wants good things for you. They might see connections you missed or remind you that you’re already living parts of your vision. Saying it out loud to another person can also make it more real, less like a fantasy you can dismiss.
Consider talking to this future self
Some people find it helpful to go beyond writing and actually have a kind of conversation with their future self. This draws from psychodrama, where you use an empty chair to externalise different aspects of yourself. I’ve been a trained psychodramatist for more than 30 years, and I’ve seen this technique unlock insights that pure mental imagery can’t reach. When clients do this, they often report that their future self ‘said’ things they hadn’t consciously planned, or that sitting in the future self’s chair gave them a sense of confidence or peace.
Here’s how to do it: after you’ve written your best possible self, place an empty chair across from you. Imagine your future self, the person you just described, sitting in that chair. Speak to this person out loud. Ask questions: ‘What did it take to get here?’ ‘What should I know?’ ‘What matters most to you now?’
Then switch chairs. Sit in the ‘future self’ chair and respond as that version of you. What would they say? What wisdom would they offer? What encouragement?
You might feel self-conscious at first. That’s normal. The power comes from embodying both perspectives. Literally changing positions helps you access different ways of seeing. This isn’t required; the writing alone works. But if you’re drawn to it, the dialogue can reveal insights that the writing might not. Based on my work with clients, this could include things like discovering that the future self is much less concerned about a career milestone than about who was brought along on the journey, or that doing what you want doesn’t require any further permission from others.
Refer back to your vision
Once you’ve written and reflected on (and, optionally, ‘talked’ with) your best possible self, don’t just discard the results. Return to what you’ve written down. You might do this before big decisions, for example, such as when you’re choosing between job pathways, or deciding whether to move or stay where you are. You can pull out your description and ask: ‘Which option moves me closer to that version of myself?’
Treat what you wrote about your best possible self as a living document. Your vision will evolve as you do, and what feels essential for you at one age might not feel the same a few years later. As I mentioned before, you can periodically revisit what you wrote and write a fresh version. You might find yourself making small revisions. Or you might realise you need to replace whole sections because your values or circumstances have changed. You may even want to add entirely new domains that you hadn’t considered before.
Also notice moments when you are being like your imagined best self, even briefly, and celebrate them. When you’ve articulated your vision of this self, it’s easier to notice when you’re already living it. This might happen during a moment of courage, for instance, or when you’ve made a decision that’s aligned with your core values. Instead of seeing your best possible self only as someone you might become someday, you can start accumulating evidence that you already are that person in some ways. Each time you notice ‘I just did what my best possible self would do’, you’re reinforcing that version of yourself in the present.
Final notes
Your brain might not naturally default to optimism. Humans are wired to focus on the negative, to scan for threats and to guard against pain in the quest to survive.
Envisioning your best possible self is a way to start developing a more balanced psychological landscape: one that includes the habit of scanning for possibilities instead of only threats, the expectation that effort can lead somewhere good, and the motivation that comes from moving toward something rather than just avoiding pain.
So take that 20 minutes. It won’t magically solve your problems or speed you effortlessly toward your goals, but it could clarify which problems and goals are worth working on, and what a better future would actually look like for you.
Dan Tomasulo is professor of teaching and academic director of the Spirituality Mind Body Institute at Teachers College, Columbia University in New York City. He is the author of Learned Hopefulness (2020) and The Positivity Effect (2023). Named the 2025 Outstanding Practitioner by the International Positive Psychology Association, he is currently working on a book of evidence-based practices for spiritual transformation. He lives in Asbury Park, New Jersey.
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