Resurgence | Arshi FF | Thread 3 | Thread 4 link updated on Page 150 - Page 41

Maybe that’s an incentive for Arpita to give us the update faster 😂.

But I must say you guys are incredible. Every time I come back there are several pages to go through. It’s like reading several updates together. Now I’m worried. I’m going to have a houseful of guests (my husband’s friend traveling from India) so we play host and tour guide and I will be having major FOMO.

Try to restrain yourselves a bit guys 🤣. Atleast for my sake 😜 or God knows what I will do. Forget Maggie I might make inedible food the next two days 😂😂

Akansha, I am very familiar with depression, it’s symptoms and feelings. I have a rather large family and my nuclear family has not escaped depression, PTSD and the consequences. It is hard and can be devastating. In fact my family has lived through a lot of life’s trials and tribulations because there are a lot of us. Remember, the US fought a senseless war in Iraq and Afghanistan. But sometimes tough love needs to come into play. Sometimes, a black and white approach has to be taken to snap someone out of the spiraling bad decisions that is tearing them and their families apart.

What I am saying, is yes be sympathetic to their illness, but enough is enough. He is dragging people down with him and he is not willing to help himself. Treating symptoms is only going to be a bandaid. The root cause needs to be addressed.

It’s not a matter of loving enough, it’s a matter of choosing what I would call darkness over light. And I feel that is what he is doing by choosing to let go of people he loves instead of addressing why he is so willing to let them go. He is choosing to hurt himself and others rather than face his demons.

He is an intelligent man that functions well in society so he is masking it well. But his friends and family can see he is spiraling. A few bad decisions I can excuse but when he runs away from his feelings and refuses to get the help he knows he needs I can’t excuse that. Yes, he is engaging in reckless behavior and on the verge of self harm, symptoms of depression and PTSD.

Well I guess now that he has destroyed his life, his marriage, alienated his family and gutted his wife it will possibly be the wake up call he needs to get the help he should have gotten earlier. And, I am not saying others didn’t make mistakes too so it isn’t that simple but his not facing things is the root cause of a lot of avoidable misery. What a shame.

My patience with him is pretty much gone. I think he is pretty self aware of his actions by his reactions to Khushi’s letter. If he was so ill that it made no difference to him then I might be a little less harsh. Like I said, God helps those who help themselves.

Originally posted by: BollyBabe75

Akansha, I am very familiar with depression, it’s symptoms and feelings. I have a rather large family and my nuclear family has not escaped depression, PTSD and the consequences. It is hard and can be devastating. In fact my family has lived through a lot of life’s trials and tribulations because there are a lot of us. Remember, the US fought a senseless war in Iraq and Afghanistan. But sometimes tough love needs to come into play. Sometimes, a black and white approach has to be taken to snap someone out of the spiraling bad decisions that is tearing them and their families apart.

What I am saying, is yes be sympathetic to their illness, but enough is enough. He is dragging people down with him and he is not willing to help himself. Treating symptoms is only going to be a bandaid. The root cause needs to be addressed.

It’s not a matter of loving enough, it’s a matter of choosing what I would call darkness over light. And I feel that is what he is doing by choosing to let go of people he loves instead of addressing why he is so willing to let them go. He is choosing to hurt himself and others rather than face his demons.

He is an intelligent man that functions well in society so he is masking it well. But his friends and family can see he is spiraling. A few bad decisions I can excuse but when he runs away from his feelings and refuses to get the obvious help he knows he needs I can’t excuse that. Yes, he is engaging in reckless behavior and on the verge of self harm, symptoms of depression and PTSD.

Well I guess now that he has destroyed his life, his marriage, alienated his family and gutted his wife it will possibly be the wake up call he needs to get the help he should have gotten earlier. What a shame.

My patience with him is pretty much gone. Like I said, God helps those who helps themselves.

You also need people to administer tough love to such people. Clearly Khushi did not do that. I had mentioned that in one of my earlier comments as well: that I feel immense pity for him because he is unable to employ the support system he has. I guess, Payal's frustrated message from back in 2006 time frame : "Why don't you talk Arnie?" comes ringing back to me!

Also, I think rock bottom means different things to different people. Like you said, perhaps his rock bottom is seeing how much he has broken Khushi. That sentence he said to Khushi after he brought her back home has been quoted over and over again. He was running around like a headless chicken not waiting for a moment of introspection, going from one task to another, convincing himself that divorce will probably assuage his guilt a little? That maybe he will feel a bit better if he sees Khushi eventually move on and be happy. But, he was trying a bandaid fix, which he *was* thoroughly convinced was the right fix. Once again, we forget that sitting at the sidelines and watching him with all the hindsight and guessing what he could have done is different from being the one taking the decisions and being right smack dab in the middle of it....

But, I have faith that he will eventually find the help he needs.

Congratulations on thread 3 Arpita. I think at the rate this is going, it will be a new thread for every update ❤️😊

Akansha, I edited and added a little at the end of my last post to clarify a little why I am so harsh on him. I feel he was self aware enough to know his actions were wrong and in that awareness he could have reached out and sought help but didn’t. At a certain point coddling and excusing just doesn’t work anymore. I think that is what many responders are doing for Arnav and it doesn’t help in the end. Yes understanding and sympathy is needed but enough is enough.

I believe, as Arpita has said, now we’ll see what he is willing to do for Khushi.

Wow! Maybe that’s why his statement of never starting the divorce if he knew it would devastate her so much got me so riled up. It all could have been avoided if if had faced up to his demons and sought help from Khushi, Payal, Akash, whomever, but most especially a professional. What a shame and a lot of senseless misery.

Originally posted by: You-Know-Who

You also need people to administer tough love to such people. Clearly Khushi did not do that. I had mentioned that in one of my earlier comments as well: that I feel immense pity for him because he is unable to employ the support system he has. I guess, Payal's frustrated message from back in 2006 time frame : "Why don't you talk Arnie?" comes ringing back to me!

Also, I think rock bottom means different things to different people. Like you said, perhaps his rock bottom is seeing how much he has broken Khushi. That sentence he said to Khushi after he brought her back home has been quoted over and over again. He was running around like a headless chicken not waiting for a moment of introspection, going from one task to another, convincing himself that divorce will probably assuage his guilt a little? That maybe he will feel a bit better if he sees Khushi eventually move on and be happy. But, he was trying a bandaid fix, which he *was* thoroughly convinced was the right fix. Once again, we forget that sitting at the sidelines and watching him with all the hindsight and guessing what he could have done is different from being the one taking the decisions and being right smack dab in the middle of it....

But, I have faith that he will eventually find the help he needs.

I am no expert but whatever I have seen and understood in life, depression is not something you can diagnose that easily, some people live with it without ever understanding why they behave in a certain way for some specific situations.

Not even their closed ones can understand. Poole with ADHD actually are most of the times left untreated.

Khushi knew Arnav was troubled so thought she will get his father to Mumbai and may be that will eventually solve his problems.

If there was no baby talk, Arnav might have never understood why he was driving himself mad with work, wanted adrenaline rush from dangerous trips.

At its is never one instance, this guy has been dealing with lot of issues since his college days, giving up his option of better college for family, and many other things.

Originally posted by: tashi26

which sentence? I can’t seem to recall.

I am no expert but whatever I have seen and understood in life, depression is not something you can diagnose that easily, some people live with it without ever understanding why they behave in a certain way for some specific situations.

Not even their closed ones can understand. Poole with ADHD actually are most of the times left untreated.

Khushi knew Arnav was troubled so thought she will get his father to Mumbai and may be that will eventually solve his problems.

If there was no baby talk, Arnav might have never understood why he was driving himself mad with work, wanted adrenaline rush from dangerous trips.

At its is never one instance, this guy has been dealing with lot of issues since his college days, giving up his option of better college for family, and many other things.

A 100% agree!⭐️

Sentence:

“Khushi I’m sorry!” The words he had been carrying around in his heart since months, left his mouth and he immediately felt lighter. “I’m so sorry. Don’t say things like these. Pathetic? You?” He halted and pulled her close again, making her gasp and look at him finally. “This was never my intention Khushi. If I knew I’d break you to such an extent, I would never even think of divorce, let alone go through with it. Please don’t do this to yourself… I” his words trailed off at the sight of her tear-stricken face.

Originally posted by: BollyBabe75

Akansha, I edited and added a little at the end of my last post to clarify a little why I am so harsh on him. I feel he was self aware enough to know his actions were wrong and in that awareness he could have reached out and sought help but didn’t. At a certain point coddling and excusing just doesn’t work anymore. I think that is what many responders are doing for Arnav and it doesn’t help in the end. Yes understanding and sympathy is needed but enough is enough.

I believe, as Arpita has said, now we’ll see what he is willing to do for Khushi.

Wow! Maybe that’s why his statement of never starting the divorce if he knew it would devastate her so much got me so riled up. It all could have been avoided if if had faced up to his demons and sought help from Khushi, Payal, Akash, whomever, but most especially a professional. What a shame and a lot of senseless misery.

What makes you think he is self aware? Self aware enough to know that whatever he is feeling would need external help to solve? A man like Arnav? Who has solved all that life threw at him and others single-handedly. Who couldn't confess to Khushi he had lost his job before he got another one? You think this man would ever think that he couldn't solve his own problems? Oh, I respectfully disagree.

The part about never starting the divorce if he knew it would break her or words to that affect. To me it shows that he is not so depressed that he doesn’t have self awareness of his actions.

Yes, he has dealt with a lot but he runs away from his feelings, doesn’t reach out and tries to handle it alone. He has an irrational fear of having a child for some probably traumatic reason, and refuses to discuss it with his wife. Finally, it’s all catching up to him.

He functions well outwardly so others don’t suspect his out of control feelings. But the point is he knows he is spiraling, thinks about going for counseling and as his habit runs away from confronting and thinks he can handle it on his own and the bad decisions start and pile up. He himself realizes he could use help and doesn’t act on it. Now that he has rendered devastation it looks like he may be willing to seek councilling.

Originally posted by: dair10arshi

Hi,

Happy to say I have read all of them except, "Letter box". Could you share the link, I don't think its on IF, is it?

Also Unexpectedly Expected, is a laughter riot. I had a hard time controlling ROFLing when I was secretly reading it in the middle of the night. Its the bummer that Saucechips hasnt completed the other FF that she was working on. She is so damn good.

This story is on Tumblr. You don't need to sign in to read the story.

I can't add external links here.

Search for Letter Box, Arshi FF in google and you will find a link which takes you to Prologue: The Bigger Price

Some chapters have working links to the next chapter and some have non working links. Nothing to worry.

Just go to the bottom of the page and use Right arrow until you get to the next chapter. Some pages have comments only. Hence you need to hit right arrow few times to get to the page with the next chapter.

Hope you enjoy the story.

Cheers..