I finally saw TJMM yesterday on Netflix. I had my expectations low, considering it is a Luv Ranjan film. I was pleasantly surprised that the woman is not shown as the scheming villain. I mean, it's a low bar. The film does have its problems. There is a significant amount of time the woman appears to be callous and heartless until she finally gets to explain her decisions.
The initial love story was also super cringe. The guy is super clingy even after the girl wants to keep things casual. I mean, he pretty much guilts her into a relationship. It is reminiscent of 500 Days of Summer, where the guy creates a fantasy true love relationship with a girl who wants to keep it casual and doesn't see long-term potential. There were many better ways to do a summer/vacation fling turned into a romance-type narrative that wasn't so cringe. Also, the breakup service business is a super cringe plot device.
But I digress.
*spoilers ahead*
I face-palmed for the majority of the movie because I was like, just be honest. Tinni is rightly overwhelmed by his family, who doesn't give their relationship space. It's always a big hangout without any intimate date nights as a couple. They're making big decisions like changing her gynecologist, telling her to quit work, and her future living space after marriage. This sudden loss of intimacy, privacy, and autonomy would take aback most people.
I understand and appreciate that she didn't want him to choose between her and his family. But that was a false dichotomy, to begin with. Why not just be honest with your partner? What is the point of a committed relationship if you cannot honestly share your concerns when something goes wrong? Most of the issues she had could have been resolved with an honest conversation. Everyone was oblivious to crossing the line and willing to make changes when they realized the issues. More importantly, the biggest issue was a doofus boyfriend who didn't realize that a romantic relationship requires balancing family time and couple time - and she just needed to tell him that.
Relationships are not a zero-sum game where one wins and the other loses. It's usually a compromise where if each partner gives the right amount, both feel better. How can you assume it's one or another without opening the discussion? And if your partner is unwilling to compromise or the terms are dealbreakers, you break up and move on.
Similarly, when he finds out that she wants to break up with him - he doubles down into a childish tit-for-tat instead of confronting her. He dares to call her a liar when he completely hides his side hustle from her. As a matter of fact, the only reason he is unwilling to confront her is because he doesn't want to expose his side hustle. You claim to love and want to marry this person but don't dare to be honest - wtf? If he had been honest about his breakup side hustle when he started dating her, she would have had no choice but to be honest with him instead of using the service. And he had a golden opportunity to be the bigger person and start a conversation, but he squanders it in childishness.
I get that it's a movie for fun, and the whole thing is a plot device for misunderstandings. It's just exasperating, though. It lets people think that relationship problems can fall in place without honest communication - which is just not true.
With sharper writing, the movie could have been much better. The romance could have been less cringe. And it would have been just as amusing to see a couple struggle through communicating their needs and compromises. Because who said honest conversations are smooth sailing? I mean think of all the sitcoms where couples have to navigate problems and misunderstandings in their relationships.
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