Wired Hearts (8) Updated Ch:61, Pg:37 |August 9th - Page 7

Hi Mariam

Trust that you are fine

would love an update

Hello! Yes, I'm fine. Sorry for going MIA. Will be updating this week, In Sha Allah!

loved the update Mari. going to reread before posting a better comment😊 hope you are well

Can't wait for your review! ❤

Hi dr .

Hope u r doing fine 

Eagerly waiting for update 

Update soon.

Waiting 

Waiting eagerly 

57. Abysm

It felt like I was spiralling downwards. Little by little, step by step, my morale slid lower and lower on the scale. The following few days were a stark difference from the previous few. They were colourless, monochrome. I confined myself to and from work. I avoided chatting with Raya or Anaya or anyone to be particular for fear of exposing the current state of my mind. I pitied myself. I was destined to be without people I loved and wanted in my life. My mind kept whispering that I was the reason I was alone. If I hadn’t rejected Maan in the first place... if I hadn’t forced my parents for a drive in that weather... if only... Such thoughts were naturally taking a toll on me and I just couldn’t bring myself to see anything positive in life at the moment.

Dodging Maan was one of the harder things to do. I couldn’t completely steer clear of his way, although I did distance myself from him. He tried talking to me and inquiring what went wrong the very next day after my trip to his house but I didn’t budge. It wasn’t easy to stay uptight in his presence.

It took a little hardness from my side to make Maan understand I wasn’t going to open up. Once he did, he retracted and gave me my space. I had probably hurt him again and I could hate myself forever for it. Such was the contradiction of emotions within me that I thought Maan had no business knowing what I was going through but I couldn’t help but wonder if things would be any different if he knew my feelings. Would it matter? Would he understand? Would he care? All the unanswered questions kept me awake at night and I considered opening up to Maan and telling him how I really felt for him. You can’t just give up without trying at least once, my heart would try to convince my unbudgeable mind every night as I lay staring at my ceiling. My heart longed for his support, his warmth and yet I couldn’t give in to pursue him. He wasn’t mine; my mind would shut all the softer feelings out. It was a constant struggle, a constant war between what I knew was right and what I wanted to be right.

Subconsciously, I kept counting the days. Zara had said they were finalising the details next week. I wondered what day it would be when I would hear of it, of Maan officially having a name attached to his for the rest of his life. That day came soon enough.

I was at home, listlessly staring at the TV screen when my phone rang to life. Looking over to see Anaya calling, I deliberated whether to answer the call or not. Sighing, I braced myself and put the phone to my ear, only to hear Anaya's worriedly frustrated voice.

“Geet!” I heard her saying. “Where have you been?! I’ve been so worried about you!”

“What’s there to worry about me?” I spoke as normally as I could.

“What is there to not worry? You haven’t been answering my calls lately. Raya said you seemed distant. And even Maan -"

She broke off midsentence. Hearing his name made me curious.

“Maan what?” I questioned with some interest.

“Well...” She seemingly contemplated. “He called me to check on you.”

Deep inside, my heart fluttered. “Why?”

“I don’t know.” She heaved a sigh. “He wouldn’t explain or answer any question. He just told me to check if you’re fine.”

“Hmm.” It was all I could respond with. My heart, however, was in a bittersweet whirlpool of emotions. On one hand, it wanted to be happy that Maan hadn’t given up and that he’d still kept my privacy by not telling Anaya. On the other hand, it was angered because I didn’t want to be thinking about him anymore. Such an act of his would only make it harder for me to move on and accept the harsh realities of my life.

 “And... I have something to tell you...” The hesitation in her voice made me wary yet I had a fair idea what she was about to say.

“What is it?”

“Maan... umm...” Anaya sputtered, looking for words as I waited, knowing fully well the reason for it yet the ache in my heart started making itself known again. “Aunty has found a girl for him...”

I remained silent, not knowing how to respond. “The family were over to Khurana Mansion yesterday and they’ve finalised it...” I squeezed my eyes shut. I had known this was coming yet I could not have prepared myself for how much that would affect me after so many days of trying to feel detached to this situation. There was a deep ache in my chest, my eyes were stinging like I had just cut an onion, and my head felt too heavy for my body so I let it fall back to hit the wall behind the couch.

“Geet?” Anaya called out. “Are you there?”

I tried to breathe deeply, to muster up a mature, sane response and a strong voice. “Yes.” My voice broke.

“I’m so sorry...” She sounded like she was on the verge of tears herself. “I can’t believe how Maan can do this to you!” Anger laced her voice. “I can’t believe he would agree to marry someone else knowing what you feel for him and -"

“No!” I interrupted instantly. “He didn’t know my feelings.”

Even if I was hurting, I couldn’t let her be upset with Maan because I didn’t really hold him responsible for the mess I was.

“What?” She asked in disbelief. “You did not even tell him? Why?!”

I remained silent.

“How can you just let him be someone else’s, Geet?!”

Now her anger was directed towards me.

“I won’t be able to bear his rejection...” My voice was merely a whisper but she heard it.

“So, what are you going to do now? Hide from him or run away?” Her scathing tone made me wince. “Are you giving up without even trying?”

“I just couldn’t tell him after I found out he is going to get engaged to someone else!” I cried.

“Going to!” Her voice was much softer. Impassioned, instead of angry now. “You can’t back off. Not this time. Even if it isn’t meant to be, at least you won’t be regretting not trying!”

“I won’t be able to take it if he looks down upon me or rejects my feelings.” I confessed in a small voice.

Anaya sighed. “Geet, you can’t know what is in his heart without even asking him. Likewise, he won’t be able to know he has a chance of spending his life with you if you never let him see it.”

Another thing popped up in my mind. “But I’m pretty sure he agreed to finding a life partner to him. Why would he even want to know that I love him when he wishes to marry that woman?”

“I can’t tell you why he agreed to marry her,” she said slowly, “but I do know that this all is arranged and not something he initiated.”

I stayed silent. Regardless of it being an arranged alliance, Maan had still given his consent. That was more than enough reason for me to not pursue him, in my opinion. Anaya did not share the same view, for she made me promise that I wouldn’t blend in the shadows without trying to bare my heart to the one who resided in it. I promised her I would try. Somewhere deep down, I wanted to give it a try too. When and how I was going to do it was a mystery to myself too.

man i am so so mad at geet....how could she do that.....how could she not tell or show maan how she felt.....he had approached her first before right...why cant she do it now.

also aunty why would she find a girl for him, when she knows their history....cant believe it....

but i am very sad...

want to know maan's pov please ....what is he thinking???

waiting eagerly to know how geet is going to proceed from her...hide away or talk to him...

or is it all a drama for geet and maan to open up to each other!!!!

hmm

57

sad update

geet distance from everyone after knowing maan's family trying to fix his marriage

worried maan ask anaya to find about geet 

geet share her thought with anaya who ask geet ot confess her feeling to maan which geet find very hard

Chapter 57

Fantastic Chapter 

I truly feel sad for Geet 

she wants to stay away from Maan yet at the same time 

she yearns for him 

I'm just hoping that he does not get engaged