Did abhimanyu birla really fight hard for his love? - Page 4

Originally posted by: Antara_302

I can give you several real life examples of how society's insistence on rituals and marriage ends up in overall disaster for everyone:

1. A few years ago, my cousin was supposed to get married to a doctor who backtracked from marriage a day before. He was being forced to marry but he chose at the last moment to be with his love instead. The funny thing is not only the groom's family but the bride's family had an idea that the guy was unhappy. He had told my cousin that he had a gf he broke up with and was getting married for his family. But they still chose to proceed in the rishta and ended up getting jilted. My uncle was obsessed with getting a doctor damad was partly the reason for this mishap (eerie similarity I know). The families were also rushing through the rituals incase the groom gets cold feet, which he did. (Another eerie similarity I know)

It was sad but really not the end of the world for my cousin. Everyone in the family agreed to not talk about it ever and it was forgotten just like that. She got an even better rishta 1 or 2 years later another doctor but this time they proceeded cautiously and with everyone's free will. They got themselves a happy marriage with 2 kids now. Now granted my cousin is no Aarohi but an Akshara irl who just abides by the family it might be her good karma didn't have to get humiliated about her lies in front of society. So being a good person does pay off at the end of the day.

Many more juicy stories I have from that side of family but will post them in relevant posts if needed.

Did your cousin get his lover back? Just asking out of curiosity...

Loved knowing about this...i want to know more such juicy stories as I come from a marwari family and in my society if something like that happens they would go after the guy... And it would be a big humilation as my community is filled with gossip aunties... They don't leave a good bride even.... They just need reason to gossip...so something like this is big deal

But I'm sure it happens in real life like you've pointed out . Want to know some more..

Well I am a Bengali and I guess we are a bit more open-minded about girl's rights and wishes (I have felt it too). We tend to move away from such discussion rather quickly especially if the girl is career oriented. People tell her to focus there. In my cousin's case she got her MBA after getting jilted but she was always inclined to be a homemaker.

You might have misunderstood the story:

My cousin never had a bf. She was getting into an arranged marriage with a guy who had a gf (or ex). Whatever the status he was clearly not over her. She was a non Bengali I think. The grapevines tell me he ended up convincing his family to let them (him and his gf) get married.

Originally posted by: Antara_302

Well I am a Bengali and I guess we are a bit more open-minded about girl's rights and wishes (I have felt it too). We tend to move away from such discussion rather quickly especially if the girl is career oriented. People tell her to focus there. In my cousin's case she got her MBA after getting jilted but she was always inclined to be a homemaker.

You might have misunderstood the story:

My cousin never had a bf. She was getting into an arranged marriage with a guy who had a gf (or ex). Whatever the status he was clearly not over her. She was a non Bengali I think. The grapevines tell me he ended up convincing his family to let them (him and his gf) get married.

No no I didn't misunderstand...i understood you're talking about the guy only...that he has gf .. good to know he got back with his lover...

Yes I agree..Bengalis are very lenient with this thing...they are ok even with daughters not getting married but in my community it's a big deal ..daughter not getting married is a big deal... I live in Bengal so i know the stark difference between Bengalis and marwari ..good that u PPL aree open minded

Loved having this discussion with u. . it's good to know that u ain't only criticized for having diff opinions but someone actually tried to explain their point...

@madhuri

I agree with most of what you said except the disregarding AR's feeling part. He might have hurt the family but definitely not AR. She was well aware of his intentions and he gave her every chance to back out.

The bringing rishta part which is highlighted so much was act that was done only after AR agreed to this stupid conditional marriage. He brought the rishta only after she approved of all his conditions. So she is equally responsible for embarrassing her own family. If anything she embarrassed them more by getting into such an alliance with lies and manipulations.

The family I agree was hurt no doubt. But they were also shown the fault in their own offspring i.e Aarohi and her lies and manipulations.

So instead of dwelling on it they chose to do what was better for involved parties i.e get Akshara and Abhimanyu married. We should applaud that and not blame them for it. This is a positive thing that is being promoted.

Originally posted by: Susi26

As per initial plot the story revolved around 3 characters.. but I guess as the viewers have gone crazy about #Abhira, the makers might have diverted the focus to Abhira and dumped Aarohi’s character. Now, let’s forget what all happened in the past. Let’s forget about the logistics. Abhira have come so far, and so should we. I’m interested to see what they gonna show post wedding. I hope to see something different like their struggle in building up their relationships with each other and with the rest of the family members.. Doctor marrying a non doctor sounds very odd, there will be lot of problems because of lack of understanding. So I want to see how they handle all these. If the makers still continue to show Abhira’s romance rather than their realistic lifestyle, I’m done with this show. We have seen enough of it,

U actually penned out my thoughts so well. We have already pointed out Abhimanyu's and Akshara's mistakes umpteen number of times and bashed them. Even the writers and actors must have forgotten the initial tracks by now. 😅 Instead of focusing on their past mistakes again and again and again let's look forward to the events post marriage keeping our logical brain in freezer because obviously after marriage also there won't be anything logical and practical in the show. 😂🤣

@born

I understand your POV much better now that i know your background. I was always confused by your opinions on several posts. I have a few marwari friends but they didn't face such pressure to be married (a little not a lot). I guess their families were exception.

Believe me we Bengali are all not doodh ka dhula progressives. Mom's side of family is filled with many such get hitched immediately to the first rishta kinda people. But luckily they also learnt from their mistakes. My dad's side and parents are more forward thinking so I keep respectful distance from mom's side and they don't bother me so much either.

But thanks for clarifying the reason for your disdain towards Abhira wedding progression. Now a lot of your posts make sense. But tbh shouldn't you applaud this forward thinking where the families are able to move forward from their blind prestige and are focusing on the kid's happiness instead. This is a welcome change right- they are looking at sweet future rather than dwelling on bitter past.

Originally posted by: Antara_302

@madhuri

I agree with most of what you said except the disregarding AR's feeling part. He might have hurt the family but definitely not AR. She was well aware of his intentions and he gave her every chance to back out.

The bringing rishta part which is highlighted so much was act that was done only after AR agreed to this stupid conditional marriage. He brought the rishta only after she approved of all his conditions. So she is equally responsible for embarrassing her own family. If anything she embarrassed them more by getting into such an alliance with lies and manipulations.

The family I agree was hurt no doubt. But they were also shown the fault in their own offspring i.e Aarohi and her lies and manipulations.

So instead of dwelling on it they chose to do what was better for involved parties i.e get Akshara and Abhimanyu married. We should applaud that and not blame them for it. This is a positive thing that is being promoted.

Originally posted by: maduri12

arohi only accepted de marriage cuz he brought it in de first place. off course she knew exactly wat she waz getting herself in 2. not only did he make it clear wid hiz words but he made it clear wid hiz actions 2. he did not even luk at her lolz. but wat me iz saying iz tat shaadi iz a big deal. wen u bring a rishta, tat is bound 2 raize hopez in a perzon. maybe not 2day or 2morrow, but maybe luv can grow over time. mayb thingz can change if u spend a lot of tyme wid tat perzon. tat is de nature of marriage. marriage meanz u will spend ur entire lyfe wid tat person. y do peeps engage in arranged marriage even wen dey dont love tat person? cuz they know that wid time, thingz will change. here, arohi knew tat abhi iz in luv wid her sister nd she waz so wrong 4 agreeing. me dont deny tat. but, abhi did make a mockery out of both sisterz feelingz. nd he waz wrong 2 leave her at the mandap 2 like tat. 4 any1 2 b left at the alter no matter how evil de r iz sad. de thing iz tat we all dislike aarohi so much tat sometimez me feelz tat we refuse 2 accept tat wrong thingz have happened wid her 2. u mentioned in ur previous post tat thingz r not alwayz black or white basically nd me agreez wid u. de thing iz that just cuz aarohi waz entirely wrong doez not mean tat abhi did not do wrong wid her 2. in termz of de family, me completely agreez wid u.

and in india marriage is not just about two individuals but also between two families....as aarohi was liked by birlas especially ab's parents..harsh was impressed by aarohi..its natural to have hopes from marriage......she wold atleast by respected as abhi's wife by others in his family n in front of society..so marriage does raise expectations

Originally posted by: borntorule12

and in india marriage is not just about two individuals but also between two families....as aarohi was liked by birlas especially ab's parents..harsh was impressed by aarohi..its natural to have hopes from marriage......she wold atleast by respected as abhi's wife by others in his family n in front of society..so marriage does raise expectations

Originally posted by: Antara_302

Well I am a Bengali and I guess we are a bit more open-minded about girl's rights and wishes (I have felt it too). We tend to move away from such discussion rather quickly especially if the girl is career oriented. People tell her to focus there. In my cousin's case she got her MBA after getting jilted but she was always inclined to be a homemaker.

You might have misunderstood the story:

My cousin never had a bf. She was getting into an arranged marriage with a guy who had a gf (or ex). Whatever the status he was clearly not over her. She was a non Bengali I think. The grapevines tell me he ended up convincing his family to let them (him and his gf) get married.

Yes i realize the reason there are clashes in this forum is because we dont have any idea where people are coming from. Our family values, experiences, mindset make us all different. At the end people should be like you to be respectful and keep your point... abusing is not ok and have seen abuse in this forum