HARRY POTTER FAN-FIC---CONT. FROM BOOK 6 - Page 2

Originally posted by: PixieDust91

I agree with what Rashmi said. That was a good suggestion. I have a few more suggestions.

1) Add some literary devices(similes, metaphors, alliterations, hyperbole). It makes it flow by smoothly and adds some interest.

2) Go a little slower. Harry leaves the house in the first two lines of your fanfic. Try adding some more in.

3) Make your chapters a little longer. Readers get more attatched to longer chapters and stories.

Other than that, you have a great story going! Update soon!

THANKS 4 THE ADVISE PIXIE DUST--IT IS JUST THAT I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH TIME. I DO THIS JUST TO ENTERTAIN YOU GUYS A BIT. I HAVE 2 OTHER FAN-FICS AND I HAVE SO MUCH HW LOAD. I WILL TRY MY BEST TO DO ALL THAT. I KNOW MY CHAPS ARE A BIT TO SMALL. EVENTUALLY, VERYTHING WILL FALL IN PLACE---BY THE WAY

I ONLY UPDATE MY FAN-FIC IN THE FAN-FIC SECTION, SOO IF YOU WANT TO READ IT PLEASE CLICK ON THE FAN FICTIONS LINK.

LUV,
K+K

Harry is shocked to see the Weasley's house in shambles.

 

"Mr. Wealsey, Mrs. Weasley, Bill, Charlie, Fred, George, Ron, Ginny??" he shouts. "Where are all of you?"

 

Suddenly Harry hears a distinct pop by the fireplace. He turns around to see himself face-to-face with Kreacher.

 

"What are you doing here?"

 

"Master, Kreacher is here to inform you something?"

 

"How am I supposed to know if you are lying?" Harry croaks at him.

 

"Even though, Kreacher hates you and rather serve the Malfoy's, I will tell you?" Kreacher talks sarcastically.

 

"WHAT DO YOU WANT TO TELLL ME NOW, AFTER I HAVE SEEN ALL THIS?" Harry yells at Kreacher.

 

"Mr. Potter, the Weasley's have gone into hiding, from He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named!"

 

"WHAT??? I am Voldemorts enemy, not anyone else!"

 

Kreacher flinches at the name.

 

"Where are they?"

 

"I mustn't tell you, I have been forbidden."

 

"KREACHER, TELL ME WHERE THEY ARE BEFORE I STRANGLE YOU!"

 

"OK, Kreacher will lead Master to the Weasley's"

You're a great writer! Plz continue soon!! 😛

Originally posted by: achal

You're a great writer! Plz continue soon!! 😛

thanks!

HI GUYS!

I AM VERY SORRY TO DISSAPOINT YOU BUT NOW, I WILL CONT. THE STORY IN GAPS. I HAVE A BIG LOAD OF HW AND I WILL TRY TO FIND TIME. BUT PLEASE FORGIVE ME IF I DON'T CONT. FOR THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS. I KNOW HOW MUCH YOU GUYS ARE LOOKING FORWARD FOR THE NEXT PART BUY MY HW LOAD IS REALLY A LOT. PLEASE FORGIVE ME.

LUV,

K+K