A teacher - student romantic relationship! Why negative opinions? - Page 7

Originally posted by: Nomadic_Vibe

To play devil's advocate the student teacher relation taboo is in Indian context. Culturally Guru Shishya relationship is considered pious and pure in our culture. It is unconditional and sacred without negative emotions. While a romantic relationship have many aspects and relationships which can have different shades like lust jealousy etc which are considered negative emotions. Sexual context of the relationship between a teacher and student is frowned upon. Especially if the teacher has a track record of abusing his position of power. We have countless examples of Uni and school professor sexually abusing or blackmailing female students. It's about what we call "his nazar". If its a one off relationship I don't mind of. But if he has a track record of such predatory behavior of abusing his position then it its ethically and morally wrong even if the relationship is consenting. I have seen three real life examples of such relationships. One is a family member with an age gap of 10 years with a marriage of 20 years and now are divorced where my uncle was her English Professor and young handsome man of 29. Another example is of my UG class mate falling for our Endo Prof who was 14 years her senior and had quite a bad reputation with female students so we were skeptical that he is taking her advantage. We all say we shouldn't judge but truth is we do. The third is of another UG student getting married to our Ortho PG prof with 8 year age gap but after her graduation and in an arrange marriage set up. One was of a UG Male class mate getting caught with a 12 year seniors female profession in a compromising position. Parents also usually find it hard to accept such relationships even if it is pure due to sheer cliff one has to cross to be together. There are always allegations of bias, favoritism, abuse of power, coercion etc.

Well penned by you, dear. 👏

The only teacher - student relationship I liked in ITV was in a decade old SabTv show Left Right Left between Captain Rajveer and Cadet Naina. ❤️ There, age difference b/w them was 5 years and their love story didn’t have a good ending as Rajveer character died. 😒

Now, in our show, I’m liking Shaurya Anokhi love story with all its elements. 😄

Originally posted by: Swetha-Sai

Well penned by you, dear. 👏

The only teacher - student relationship I liked in ITV was in a decade old SabTv show Left Right Left between Captain Rajveer and Cadet Naina. ❤️ There, age difference b/w them was 5 years and their love story didn’t have a good ending as Rajveer character died. 😒

Now, in our show, I’m liking Shaurya Anokhi love story with all its elements. 😄

I have been a silent reader so far and I am not a regular watcher either but I found this thread very interesting.

I am not the biggest fan of Shaurya and Anokhi's story, not because of the teacher- student thing but because I don't see how an Anokhi could ever fall for a Shaurya. That aside, those people finding their relationship problematic (who mind you are two ADULTS, 20 and 29) will be the likes to find Ezra and Aria from PLL 'cute' and 'swoonworthy' and there Aria was all of 16 when she dated a 24 year old Ezra.

I am currently in university and I have found countless young 20 something professors extremely hot but I wouldn't get into a relationship with them. I think it would be great if Anokhi and Shaurya do fall for each other now but actually start something once she's graduated. Think about it, not just from the guru-shishya or right-wrong lens but what all Anokhi will have to endure if people got to know of their relationship. She's so smart but then people will think Shaurya is partial towards her etc. To avoid all this, it's better if they hold off on being actual boyfriend and girlfriend until they are no longer student and teacher.

I agree with all of you who have pointed out how manhandling and physical abuse are glorified in the name of 'passion' and 'sizzling chemistry'. If Anokhi and Shaurya are two CONSENTING adults, then I don't see what's the harm. I think those who do have an issue with this are the dhoom tana TRP aunties who love to see a bebas bechaari who has all autonomy snatched away from her and is thrown into a relationship with somebody she barely knows.

Once they're out of this college set up where there is a very obvious unequal power dynamic between them, they can truly explore a wholesome relationship.

Originally posted by: RaarA

Exactly that's where problem lies.

We as audience mostly watch toxic stories. More than some realistic stories we like it where FL is bechari abla Naari.

Most of the audience don't like to watch strong female leads like swadheenta Ramakrishnan or Suman of EDKV.

But all are gaga over Gopi bahu. There has been shoes which were quite progressive. But ofcourse they were shut down because of low viewership.

Yes this! Swadheenta Ramakrishnan is my all time favourite FL. She always stood for what she believed in and didn't do rona dhona and tyag for her husband and family. I would also add Sai Joshi from GHKPM. That show is hella toxic and I stopped watching it recently because it just elevates my BP but Sai is a firebrand. She didn't follow the doormat-after-marriage-FL trope.

Originally posted by: Nomadic_Vibe

Girls I'll be very honest I used to be suckered for those MCP toxic heros too in my teens growing up because I read Mills and Boon and watched TV where this was considered "intense" and "passionate". Alpha male who are Tall Dark and Handsome were considered to be the dreamy bachelor who were also Casonova Bad boys. That's how my idea of Romance and passion was constructed but as and when I grew up I realized how wrong I have been all these years. My relationship expectations and behavior of men changed and so did my expectations of ITV ML. I am damn sure like the 90s Romance of creepy stalking is over and evolved in few years we will have well written ML on ITV too. I am quite positive.

Thank you for this! I must admit, I was a sucker for these stories as well till I was about 15-16 and it was majorly ITV which made me think this is the ideal love story. I was having a similar discussion with somebody else on another forum about this. You and I were lucky that we got out of this mentality but there are countless girls out there who long for a boyfriend/husband like Arnav Singh Raizada or Shivaay or Rudraksh Khurana, etc. ITV's impact is huge and they are just ruining the minds of young girls. This constant goody two shoes nature of FLs also sends out the message that girls aren't allowed to make mistakes, always think of others, etc. But sadly, ITV is just going backwards and showing no signs of any progression.

Originally posted by: I-Am-SherLOCKED

Thank you for this! I must admit, I was a sucker for these stories as well till I was about 15-16 and it was majorly ITV which made me think this is the ideal love story. I was having a similar discussion with somebody else on another forum about this. You and I were lucky that we got out of this mentality but there are countless girls out there who long for a boyfriend/husband like Arnav Singh Raizada or Shivaay or Rudraksh Khurana, etc. ITV's impact is huge and they are just ruining the minds of young girls. This constant goody two shoes nature of FLs also sends out the message that girls aren't allowed to make mistakes, always think of others, etc. But sadly, ITV is just going backwards and showing no signs of any progression.

Originally posted by: I-Am-SherLOCKED

Thank you for this! I must admit, I was a sucker for these stories as well till I was about 15-16 and it was majorly ITV which made me think this is the ideal love story. I was having a similar discussion with somebody else on another forum about this. You and I were lucky that we got out of this mentality but there are countless girls out there who long for a boyfriend/husband like Arnav Singh Raizada or Shivaay or Rudraksh Khurana, etc. ITV's impact is huge and they are just ruining the minds of young girls. This constant goody two shoes nature of FLs also sends out the message that girls aren't allowed to make mistakes, always think of others, etc. But sadly, ITV is just going backwards and showing no signs of any progression.

Same here. I used love those angry young man persona when I was a like 15-16 yr old. But as I grew up and realized what sort of behavior is unacceptable for me, I accepted that ITV men (characters) are exactly the kind of men I should avoid.

These shows actually create a sterotype that 'Men misbehave/harass the woman they like' and try to imply that it is okay because its their version on 'Love'

I am horrified about this because so many young girls watch these shows and form an impression about such ideologies. And TBH, as a grown up whenever my parents approach me with the topic of my marriage somewhere down the line, my worst fear is that I might end up with someone like the men in these shows coz I am definitely no goodie goodie like the women (who are definitely wrong to tolerate such behavior)

Makes me wonder why do men change after falling in love? So, if they don't fall in love, will he continue to manhandle/misbehave with the FL..?

Brb - Since I have been one who is not in favour of the romantic relations between student and teacher and being in education myself... I have a few things to add. 😛

Originally posted by: I-Am-SherLOCKED

I have been a silent reader so far and I am not a regular watcher either but I found this thread very interesting.

I am not the biggest fan of Shaurya and Anokhi's story, not because of the teacher- student thing but because I don't see how an Anokhi could ever fall for a Shaurya. That aside, those people finding their relationship problematic (who mind you are two ADULTS, 20 and 29) will be the likes to find Ezra and Aria from PLL 'cute' and 'swoonworthy' and there Aria was all of 16 when she dated a 24 year old Ezra.

I am currently in university and I have found countless young 20 something professors extremely hot but I wouldn't get into a relationship with them. I think it would be great if Anokhi and Shaurya do fall for each other now but actually start something once she's graduated. Think about it, not just from the guru-shishya or right-wrong lens but what all Anokhi will have to endure if people got to know of their relationship. She's so smart but then people will think Shaurya is partial towards her etc. To avoid all this, it's better if they hold off on being actual boyfriend and girlfriend until they are no longer student and teacher.

I agree with all of you who have pointed out how manhandling and physical abuse are glorified in the name of 'passion' and 'sizzling chemistry'. If Anokhi and Shaurya are two CONSENTING adults, then I don't see what's the harm. I think those who do have an issue with this are the dhoom tana TRP aunties who love to see a bebas bechaari who has all autonomy snatched away from her and is thrown into a relationship with somebody she barely knows.

Once they're out of this college set up where there is a very obvious unequal power dynamic between them, they can truly explore a wholesome relationship.

An interesting perspective!

Though for me ,shaurya falling for her is a bit questionable! Might be convincing for me that a student falls for a teacher!

After college? I like this perspective. Maybe i have read it in a novel this kind of situation.

But i dont mind even if they start relation before because even if they do afterwards, it will be under benefits taken by teacher! So yeah, we cant remove this point!

Originally posted by: AliChase

I agree with people here. Majority of the problem lies with the viewers who want to watch things that are downright abusive and creepy.

There is no idea of an intense romance that isn't abusive in ITV. So, when there is a general difference in this idea, the majority of the audience doesn't want to see it. Nowhere in ITV can we see a constant strong FL. She comes across as strong, confident, and someone who stands for herself only to become a doormat after she is married to the ML.

Just a thought. Maybe the viewers who are enjoying toxicity are the ones who have facing troubles themselves and want to see someone else going through worse. That's why when someone even tries to come up with progressive thought series, it doesn't catch much attention.

What is intense romance ?