Originally posted by: zaroonkashaf
This was an interesting read for sure. I'm not sure I agree with everything but can't help but dig how you articulated your thoughts.
I'll start with my views on mental health first. As someone who struggles with mental health issues, as someone who has loved ones who struggle with mental health issues, it's obviosuly a subject that is extremely close to my heart.
I think it's very unfair to club all Sushant's fans in a box and claim or insinuate that they have the views they do because they aren't as well informed about mental health in general. I think some of us aren't just informed because we are interested in reading about it but it's also a knowledge that comes from our own very personal experiences.
The whole conversation on mental health when it comes to this case has been full of contradictions and double standard. Mental health doesn't exist in a vacuum, even folks who have a history of mental illness in their families will testify to the fact that more often than not the triggers are external. You can be predisposed to it due to biological factors but it can still be exacerbated by your environment or by events in your life.
Now let's come to the environment part of things. Sushant was a part of an industry that is toxic to say the least. There are factors here that one can not brush aside. Neptoism exists! It has existed for a very long time and it continues to. This is not to state that this was a factor here but this is to state that one can't brush it under the carpet as the struggle of an outsider will be very different from one who is not. Not everyone can cope up with the pressure that comes with being an outsider. I'm stating this not because I believe this was a vital factor here, I'm stating this from the point of view of how it can impact anyone's mental health.
There's also a need within this industry to box people within labels. If you don't fit the mould they have made for you or a mould that they are used to, you will be tagged as the "odd" one out. This is what Sushant experienced to a very large degree. He was someone who couldn't fit the cliched moulds of this industry and often found himself being ridiculed in some way or the other by the same industry.
The toxicity within this industry is also due to the culture of blind items and bullying that happens in the form of blind items. I wish more focus was given to how much this can impact people's mental health. I have seen various people argue here that so many people face it. Okay....so? Just because so many face it, it doesn't make it right. Not everyone is build the same way. Not everyone's brain is wired the same way. Not everyone has a thick skin to put up with the kind of malicious crap that was written about Sushant for years. It's ironic to see some people talk about mental while absolutely sidelining everything or every factor that could have impacted his mental health.
Since we are talking about environment, I'd like to also talk about abusive or toxic relationships. This is something that hasn't even received a modicum of attention by the media that is so interested in talking about mental health. An abusive relationship can destroy even the most "sound" minds. Everything that his family has stated points towards a relationship where he was being emotionally and mentally abused. Unfortunately we live in a society where abuse isn't taken as seriously, esp when it is emotional and mental in nature. When women who have been the victims of such abuse find it hard to get justice, it's no surprise that even those who consider themseleves "woke" or "liberal" aren't even willing to grasp, forget accept, that men too can be victims of abuse and deserve justice.
One last thing when it comes to the topic of mental health. Words like bipolar disorder, depression, schizophrenia have been thrown around left, right and centre. I remember it hadn't even been a couple of hours after Sushant's passing that some within the industry had already diagnosed him as someone who was struggling with "schizophrenia". Please know that nobody here is helping the cause of mental health by throwing out these words so causally. There are plenty of people in the mental health community who struggle in silence and it's precisely because of this reason. One is increasing the stigma around some of these mental disorders by throwing these terms out there so nonchalantly.
There is another aspect of this that has only increased the stigma around mental health and it is the way the media and some people have covered it or commented on it. A therapist who has probably had a couple of sessions with Sushant is put on air and she makes certain declarations. This is hailed by many who claim to care about the cause mental health. Please stop condoning therapists and psychiatrists who can't abide by the basic ethics here. Nobody is helping the cause of mental health by condoning those who breach client confidentiality. You can not get rid of the taboos that exist in our society if you on one hand are condoning all this while on the other claiming you care about the cause.
I'll now address the misogyny part of things here along with the media trial. Are we as a society misogynistic? Absolutely. There's no doubt about that. But I fail to see what does patriarchy have to do with this particular case. It's ironic to see an industry talk about patriarchy with regards to this issue. This is an industry where majority of the stuff they produce is full is misogyny. This is an industry where folks like Salman Khan are worshipped by the same people who are now posting nursery rhymes. This is an industry where the male superstars who are in their 50s are still starring opposite women who are in their 20s while the female actors who are in their 50s are given roles of mothers and bhabhis. This is an industry where the same people who are now talking about patriarchy were not so long back supporting the likes of Hirani and Sajid Khan. The less said the better when it comes how convenient their take is on "patriarchy".
Now coming to what Rhea has faced with regards to the media. Rhea filed a petition in the SC talking about a media trial. It's just amusing to see some people run with what she said without once questioning the part that she has played in supporting a media trial. She has released videos, texts, notes that pertain to her dead ex boyfriend. She has maligned his family, esp his sisters in the same media. She has given interviews where she has spewed one lie after the other. So she has used the same media as a platform to do exactly what she is apparently against. Yet nobody has raised their voice against her own double standard. Nobody raised their voice when vile things were said about his sisters and his family. Hell nobody raised their voice when Sushant was being maligned by her. So that tells you a little about the hypocisy of those who claim they are against media trials.
Now coming to the bit about drugs and weed consumption. I have seen quite a few state what is the big deal about smoking weed. Everyone does it. I'm not someone who will judge anyone for their lifestyle choices. There are plenty who do weed because it makes then calm. Many do it because it has been prescibed to them. Some do it just because they dig it. All good. Now here is the question for folks who claim it is not a big deal. If it is not a big deal then how can someome who has at least been doing it since 2017 claim that they have never done weed or drugs in their life. Rhea claimed that. She didn't just stop there. She went a bit further and dragged her dead ex boyfriend in it. She claimed she only procured it for him and has never done it in her life. Anyone with a modicum of common sense will see how blatant a lie it is. These are her chats. Her words. Some of them go all the way back to 2017. She had no issues blaming someone for it who is not even here to defend himself. Let's play devil's advocate here. So Sushant was such an "addict" that he didn't know where to source stuff for himself but someone who has never done drugs or weed in her life knew a whole host of dealers....lol. I mean come on. Since when did feminism become about not owning up to your shit. Had the genders here been reversed and had a guy blamed his dead ex girlfriend for his own habits, he would have been dragged through the mud. There is another point I'd like to make here, she and her brother haven't just been arrested for consuming weed. If I'm not wrong the charges also state they were dealing in it which pretty much means they were making profit off it.
Now comes the larger conversation on drugs being made legal, I'm not sure if I agree there. I think making weed legal makes sense but if one is talking about hard drugs then I don't quite agree. We are living in a country where millions are below the poverty line. There aren't medical facilities for basic issues, forget rehabilitation centres for addicts . It is very easy to state some of these things but we are not all wired the same way. Some of us have addictive personalities. And if access to hard drugs becomes easy, it will be very easy for those folks to get addicted to it. Not everyone has a supportive system behind them. Not everyone can afford to get themselves admitted in a rehab. Not everyone has enough knowledge about what it even means to be addicted so making hard drugs legal would only lead to further problems. The healthcare infrastructure is on the verge of collapse in this country, now imagine adding this to it.
Damn, you wrote so well. Spot on.
Exactly that Rhea has also used the same media which people are bashing right now in support of her .
Anupamaa
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