MayRa/ShivJen DT #35 "Hum ek doosre ke dil mein rehte hai" - Page 102

Originally posted by: Armu4eva

Guys🤗🤗

You all are fighters.... Queens.. Love you all❤️

All that love right back at ya!! ♥️♥️♥️

Originally posted by: tournesol

This entire DT ships RuRa

Imagine Shivin and Paras coming to know they are shipped 🤣

I am sure they know. The CVs know. They are intentionally making Rura canon.

They are even feeding the conspiracy theorists. Akkha din Rudra kehta hai----mein sab janta hoon and all the fans go gaga ke Rudra khiladi hai and all that 😆

Originally posted by: stormborn

I am sure they know. The CVs know. They are intentionally making Rura canon.

They are even feeding the conspiracy theorists. Akkha din Rudra kehta hai----mein sab janta hoon and all the fans go gaga ke Rudra khiladi hai and all that 😆

I will be the first to go gaga...🤣

Originally posted by: stormborn

Yah dear I understand. The stories I told you in previous comments were where I didn't fall prey and ignored the games.

But the biggest mind gamer I have met was my first or rather only love. He was just like the tailor-made guy with whatever I wanted in a guy. Even ironically it started when in a spin the bottle game---I was asked what kind of guy I wanted and I told the criterias I had even before meeting him. And all my friends screamed omg that's exactly him. Coincidentally he reached there at the same time and it was a awkward but sweet situation.

Anyway, lots of flirting, indirect proposal from him, his proposal from his friends, mind games later----I proposed him. His answer was-----Why are you being so serious ?

So for that long time (years), every gesture and everything from him was just joke/game(we were not committed but he always acted as if we were a couple and rumours were spread even in the circles I didn't know. It was complicated and I was naive and young i.e. stupid.)

I had a hard time moving on but when I did, I moved on completely.

I think-----not stalking his online profiles helps. I mean Not entering any of his profiles even once and not getting any updates from his life.

Trying to forget does more harm than help. Just cut yourself some slack, give yourself time, accept wholeheartedly that he would have been wrong for you in the long term (which is true as per his behavior) and don't lose belief in love 🤗

Sorry for such a loooonngggg comment 😳

Okay I don’t normally cuss but just insert the choicest words for him here..

I can’t imagine your pain because mine at least claimed to love me and we fell apart for nothing but yours makes me so mad.

I wish guys realize that girls aren’t their freaking toys and they can’t dispassionately throw them away when they’re bored.

I had deactivated my accounts on social after the break up because the need to stalk him used to be worse than Antara’s.. and I knew I’d collapse if I don’t step away.

That acceptance hasn’t come yet tbh because somewhere the sickest part of me wishes that he comes back (I know.. it’s shameful but that’s why I kinda get where Anu is coming from I guess)

Oh the SRK fan in me is ridiculously romantic and still believes my “palat” moment will happen 😂

Please don’t be!! I think we all need moments to vent.

Originally posted by: Gurmeet4Drashti

Okay I don’t normally cuss but just insert the choicest words for him here..

I can’t imagine your pain because mine at least claimed to love me and we fell apart for nothing but yours makes me so mad.

I wish guys realize that girls aren’t their freaking toys and they can’t dispassionately throw them away when they’re bored.

I had deactivated my accounts on social after the break up because the need to stalk him used to be worse than Antara’s.. and I knew I’d collapse if I don’t step away.

That acceptance hasn’t come yet tbh because somewhere the sickest part of me wishes that he comes back (I know.. it’s shameful but that’s why I kinda get where Anu is coming from I guess)

Oh the SRK fan in me is ridiculously romantic and still believes my “palat” moment will happen 😂

Please don’t be!! I think we all need moments to vent.

thanks 🤗

I didn't get how he manipulated even others into his games. He even befriended my bestie's crush (a mind gamer as well) and repeatedly lied to us about it. They diagonally played with us-----her crush tried to lure me to him and he tried to lure my bestie to the crush. The whole fiasco was full of lies but still I guess that challenge somehow attracted me. And also the moments you talked about (eg: If I were upset, he would do anything to make me smile. If someone insults me, he would make that person's day hell. He had 102 fever but I unknowingly asked him to stay and he didn't leave until I left and suffered silently because of the fever. We used to teasingly fight, and whenever somehow I made him bleed, he would lie that it was wounded from before and I was not at fault, so that I don't feel bad.) I can go on but should stop now.

I can't believe how 100% of it could be acting. So may be it was, may be it wasn't. But you guys were right-----may be some stuffs about these guys are genuine and relationships with these guys are like roller coasters of emotions. Whenever that roller-coaster is atop, it feels heavenly and that makes the moving on so hard. The hope to have those moments again refuses to be wiped out completely. Usually a closure helps. But getting a closure is not as easy as it sounds. I hope you get over it soon and next time find someone who genuinely possesses the traits you thought this guy did.

Originally posted by: tournesol

This entire DT ships RuRa

Imagine Shivin and Paras coming to know they are shipped 🤣

Someone needs to tell them 🤣

Originally posted by: stormborn

thanks 🤗

I didn't get how he manipulated even others into his games. He even befriended my bestie's crush (a mind gamer as well) and repeatedly lied to us about it. They diagonally played with us-----her crush tried to lure me to him and he tried to lure my bestie to the crush. The whole fiasco was full of lies but still I guess that challenge somehow attracted me. And also the moments you talked about (eg: If I were upset, he would do anything to make me smile. If someone insults me, he would make that person's day hell. He had 102 fever but I unknowingly asked him to stay and he didn't leave until I left and suffered silently because of the fever. We used to teasingly fight, and whenever somehow I made him bleed, he would lie that it was wounded from before and I was not at fault, so that I don't feel bad.) I can go on but should stop now.

I can't believe how 100% of it could be acting. So may be it was, may be it wasn't. But you guys were right-----may be some stuffs about these guys are genuine and relationships with these guys are like roller coasters of emotions. Whenever that roller-coaster is atop, it feels heavenly and that makes the moving on so hard. The hope to have those moments again refuse to wipe out completely. Usually a closure helps. But getting a closure is not as easy as it sounds. I hope you get over it soon and next time find someone who genuinely possesses the traits you thought this guy did.

Oh my god. That just sounds horrible. How is your friend doing??

EXACTLY!! There were a million instances in those 6 months of wooing which felt extremely genuine and THOSE moments led me to fall for him hook, line and sinker.

Staying back for me when he didn’t have to, was the one I cherished the most because it showed that I was important for him?

@bold: I think you have articulated my feelings.

Where and how do you get that closure?? Those lapses where I miss him so much, are so out of the blue that I want to call him up and scream or just cry.

It’s not like I consciously think of him.. he just pops in my head in the most random instances even while I’m in the midst of something and I’ve no option but to regroup and do everything to suppress the thought..

Originally posted by: Gurmeet4Drashti

Oh my god. That just sounds horrible. How is your friend doing??

EXACTLY!! There were a million instances in those 6 months of wooing which felt extremely genuine and THOSE moments led me to fall for him hook, line and sinker.

Staying back for me when he didn’t have to, was the one I cherished the most because it showed that I was important for him?

@bold: I think you have articulated my feelings.

Where and how do you get that closure?? Those lapses where I miss him so much, are so out of the blue that I want to call him up and scream or just cry.

It’s not like I consciously think of him.. he just pops in my head in the most random instances even while I’m in the midst of something and I’ve no option but to regroup and do everything to suppress the thought..

This incident is from years ago. My friend is now happily married. So is the guy. I am not in contact with either of them. I don't even think about him and even though I am talking about him, I am not feeling anything about him---not even hatred or anger.

bold: My closure came gradually in multiple steps but if I have to use one word----It came from my self-worth (or rather the wholehearted acceptance that I deserve respect).

At the first I wrote a lot of things. but to think----closure can't be that long. So editing:

it's basically accepting 3 facts wholeheartedly-----

1) Even if he is a good guy and comes back, even then it should be a no because we are wrong for each other. A guy who confuses me now will confuse me the whole life. That's not the life I want or deserve.

2) Respect is the most important. Period.

3) He doesn't give a fcuk about me. (may be to my looks or humor or some other x factor got him entertained, but not a damn about the human ME. If he did, he wouldn't hamper the peace of my mind like that.)

-----Accepting these (took time and lots of self reflection) and realizing wholeheartedly that I deserve better was the closure for me.This realization still works in my favor and helped me to dodge some other vicious bullets as well.

Originally posted by: Gurmeet4Drashti

Oh my god. That just sounds horrible. How is your friend doing??

EXACTLY!! There were a million instances in those 6 months of wooing which felt extremely genuine and THOSE moments led me to fall for him hook, line and sinker.

Staying back for me when he didn’t have to, was the one I cherished the most because it showed that I was important for him?

@bold: I think you have articulated my feelings.

Where and how do you get that closure?? Those lapses where I miss him so much, are so out of the blue that I want to call him up and scream or just cry.

It’s not like I consciously think of him.. he just pops in my head in the most random instances even while I’m in the midst of something and I’ve no option but to regroup and do everything to suppress the thought..

I can tell you one thing-----trying-to-forget is actually remembering. When you are saying to yourself----I won't think about him, you are basically taking his name in your mind.

Whenever the thoughts pop up, let yourself flow. Just try not to make any new memories. Believe it or not, even memories are finite. When it pops, let it flow, when it's done, get back to work. Don't strain or guilt trip yourself over it.

Most importantly----cut yourself some slack and give yourself all the time you need. The closure itself will walk and come to you.

Originally posted by: stormborn

This incident is from years ago. My friend is now happily married. So is the guy. I am not in contact with either of them. I don't even think about him and even though I am talking about him, I am not feeling anything about him---not even hatred or anger.

bold: My closure came gradually in multiple steps but if I have to use one word----It came from my self-respect.

I was tired of the lies (insult to my brains) and tired of the rumors (insult to my image).

I am usually a person who has always been very less emotional and driven by logic and practicality. I seldom talked to people, usually concentrated on studies and my own inner world.

But somehow I got into that shit and became somewhat a different person. I knew I was being lied to, he teased and flirted with me all the time which were something I would never approve of someone else to do, still I kept enduring all that. But still I was getting tired of the games and lies and then I proposed. I could handle a rejection or friendzone. But the 'why so serious' had me stunned ! That meant he admitted to everything and unapologetically accepted that everything was a joke to him. That was the moment I lost my respect for him and decided not to cross his shadow again. But he didn't let me. He kept attacking my vulnerable side in social NWs. In a friend's wedding, he made everyone lie about him coming, then he came and started post-proposal manipulation 2.0..But this time it didn't affect me as such. May be the old 'me' started to get back. I avoided and he kept indirect manipulation aka the 'joke' alive. It was painful but my indifference was increasing. After a time those started to overshadow the moments and memories that hold me down. Plus I had entered professional life and got quite busy.

Once even he pretended to lose direction so that I had to walk with him through the street alone and may be manipulate even more or something. I pretended to call my dad's non-functioning phone the whole time and didn't talk to him. That time I had 90% moved on.

In the meantime, I came to know that his marriage was fixed which he had hidden to all our common friends (I told you m good at online stalking. I found his fiancee's profile.)

We met for the last time in a group gathering after that (He walked beside me, stopped me from going home and still didn't tell me about the marriage). That day after bidding him goodbye, I realised 2 things----1) that was the final goodbye 2) My feelings for him were blank. I had moved on completely.

After that I have had normal crushes, no relationship, healthy habits and I am busy building my career.

Now my friends come to me whenever they are confused and need to detect a mind-gamer....because I have become a pro in that. 😆

You know what.. at certain times we should really give in to out gut feelings.. they never lie. Trust me.. they never lie!!! Especially when someone is playing with your emotions.

Par ye obvious baat hai that we ignore some of these gut signals that our body and mind sends you especially about guys like these..

Puraani baton ko bhool jao. Concentrate on your career. Kyonki vahi humare kaam aane vala hai aage jaake (agar kisike saath mile ya na mile)