New to the forum Question abt Babita as a mom

Hi everyone. I am a longtime lurker and posting this topic for the first time since it is bothering me a bit.

How good is Babita as a mom? Today when when was talking to Minnie about new clothes for her wedding and Minnie said that she hasn't bought anything for herself, Babita just nonchalantly made a perfunctory protest before starting with her own feelings. Almost every mom I have seen buys clothes for her children first during festivals and functions. Even when daughter get married and move away from home moms still think of gifts for the daughters before she buys gifts for herself. And here Minnie who is all of 17 is arranging the whole wedding for her mom and Babita doesn't even think of buying new clothes for her? She is a career woman, earns handsomely and yet doesn't even bother to think about buying her daughter a new set of clothes?

Come to think of it..was it ever shown that Babita is indulging and spoiling her daughter as most moms do? Buy her a camera, for instance, when she knows how much Minnie loves photography. On the contrary she returned the jewelry to Beeji when it rightfully belonged to Minnie.

I don't mean to bash Babita but maybe the CVs have done a poor job in showing the protective, indulgent maternal side of babita. Maybe HS wasn't so wrong when he told her 'Beti pe thoora dyan do'

I think writers are neglecting that aspect of Babita in showing Minnie as sacrificing.. I understand your point...today I also felt weird about babita accepting so easily that her daughter is wearing old clothes in her wedding..

I understand what you mean buy I think the writers are also saying that Babita should enjoy these moments and be just a woman, a bride, without having to worry about being a mother in some moments. Especially since Minnie is a grown up and can take care of herself

mini already has a camera given by HS

And HS already has a asked mini to select a dhayin sa lehnga so im sure mini must have selected for wedding. i think it was just for the roka & chunri function which involved only family hat mini wanted to wear old clothes

i for that matter hate it if i have to wear a dress only once and not use it again. its a waste i feel

Originally posted by: inlieu

I understand what you mean buy I think the writers are also saying that Babita should enjoy these moments and be just a woman, a bride, without having to worry about being a mother in some moments. Especially since Minnie is a grown up and can take care of herself

They don’t have to show her neglecting her duties as a mother to enjoy the moments as a bride/woman. I too thought this about how they fail to show babita as a proper mother in her attempt to show her female emancipation. By babitas own words she keeps referring to mini as a child, yet she’s only a “child” when it comes to babita herself claiming to know better about a situation. The very same child is arranging the wedding for eg. I don’t like how babita interchanges treating mini as friend and equal and child. When it seems to benefit babita (eg when she’s arranging her salary at the factory or arranging meetings for her for the business) then she’s very much an equal but when it comes to babita wanting her orders to be followed then mini is a child.

I have often wondered how they’ve created a character such a mini with her growing up in the household that she did. Who has she learned from to be this way? Is it really all on her own because she is not like babita or anyone else in khurana household.

I do wish they’d show babita being a better mother. She’s actually a better daughter in law, even post divorce than she is a parent. This is my personal opinion

Originally posted by: riti4u

I think writers are neglecting that aspect of Babita in showing Minnie as sacrificing.. I understand your point...today I also felt weird about babita accepting so easily that her daughter is wearing old clothes in her wedding..

So did I. As much as it’s babitas day, when a mother and daughter are a part of a wedding, they usually make a big fuss about what each other is going to wear! How babita can accept her daughter wearing old clothes at her wedding I have no idea. One thing is for sure, mini would never let ANYONE (be it babita, hs, or her grandparents) wear old clothes at her wedding.

I hope in babitas emancipation, it doesn’t end up being mini ending up bitter and resentful with all the sacrificing she’s doing. I kinda got a glimpse of it the other day when she was telling babita about the alimony etc. I didn’t realise she was holding all of that resentment over the incident.

Even during the camera incident, Babita knew Mini loved photography. So when she started earning money, she could have bought a camera for her. When HS bought it, Babita reacted because she thought HS is trying to get her by bribing Mini. Which means she was thinking about herself, her situation rather than thinking that Mini does deserve a camera. This is how the CVs presented it. I am just stating what CVs have already shown. Perhaps the CVs have something in mind about Babita's complexes which they will deal with after marriage. Mini is just 17. She should be enjoying her life rather than babysitting her mother all the time. A thought that Babita seldom thinks. I have two kids. I It will break my heart if I see them spending their childhood to be my guardian. Childhood or bachpan baar baar nahin aata. Kids should be allowed to be kids. It is the parent's responsibility.

Having said that, I think CVs do have something in mind about Babita's complexes. They gave some hints in the HS - Mini scene today. I really want to know Ashok Babita's initial years of marriage. The solution to the future may lie in her past. Just like HS said today...whatever is there needs to come out first...

Originally posted by: naq5

mini already has a camera given by HS

And HS already has a asked mini to select a dhayin sa lehnga so im sure mini must have selected for wedding. i think it was just for the roka & chunri function which involved only family hat mini wanted to wear old clothes

i for that matter hate it if i have to wear a dress only once and not use it again. its a waste i feel

If she's planning on wearing that once worn suit for the smaller functions, then I'm fine. But she better have gotten something new for the wedding proper. 😳

I'm gonna put this question out there since I'm drawing a blank now: What has Babita ever done for Minnie?

We have seen Minnie continuously make all the sacrifices, and be her guiding support, but when has Babita ever done the same for her?

The one moment that comes to mind is when Babes stood up for Minnie at the Gulabo ice cream parlor when they had newly shifted. But other than that, nothing really comes to mind.

Originally posted by: asmaanixx

I'm gonna put this question out there since I'm drawing a blank now: What has Babita ever done for Minnie?

We have seen Minnie continuously make all the sacrifices, and be her guiding support, but when has Babita ever done the same for her?

The one moment that comes to mind is when Babes stood up for Minnie at the Gulabo ice cream parlor when they had newly shifted. But other than that, nothing really comes to mind.

When Babita told off Meeta when Meeta was accusing Minni of becoming poisonous (you had never seen Babita stood her ground until that time) . When Babita supported Minni against the khuranas when she said she wanted to change her last name. When Babita tried to re-connect Minni to her fathers side of the family when she realized that because of her, Minni has lost contact and relationship with those people. When Babita understood Minni's mental health situation and inspite of having a different outlook, went to the doctor to discuss Minni's situation when many times parents don't even take the whole mental health issues positively. When Babita fought with that interviewer when Minni's interview portions were not shown. When Babita understood Minni and Mickey's friendship after her fight with Minni, inspite having social conditioning of "log kya kahenge". When Babita felt unworthy of a mother when Minni sacrificed her admission to get Babita the shoes. When Babita was not ready to accept her feelings for HS because of how Minni would react or if Minni would accept it.