|MJHT Drabble : The one with Dia|

The first time I fell in love, it was with my oldest friend, my best friend. He was Mr. Popular in College; the stereotypical jock with the benefit of a soft heart. Of course it was only natural that I fall in love with him.

Maybe, 'love' is a big word. But I liked him. A lot. Or at least I liked the idea of being with him and being the most popular couple in College. I don't really know. I guess I won't be able to ever tell.

You see, I was a diva. It sounds silly to address myself as one but back then, that's what I wore as a badge of honor. I was spoiled and pampered and acted every bit of the pricey person that I was. Growing up the one thing that turned eyeballs was my attitude, and I wore it high. Maybe, things would have been different if mum wasn't estranged or if dad was around more often. But they weren't. And to compensate for it, I was showered with all the material comforts, ergo I grew up to be the shallow, self-centered diva that I was. Now, this isn't me justifying my egotistic self, but it's quite a reason.

My best friend, Samrat Shergill or Sammy, perhaps was the only person for whom I spared a morsel of care apart from my little brother and dad. My "friends"didn't make it to the list. [I wasn't a complete buffoon so as to not discern between flattery and genuine care.]

Anyway, it only made sense that Sammy be the one.

Of course, life had alternate plans, and I am glad that things turned out the way it did.

In the present, at least. I don't think I was as mature back then. Neither did I possess the advantage of hindsight.

So, back in College, I waited for my best friend to make a move. His incessant flirting and excessive pampering could only mean love, isn't it? I couldn't have mistook his affections for me. Perhaps, the most popular guy should be with the most popular girl.

Wrong. Absolutely wrong.

While I waited for him to make a move, he had a roving eye for my cousin dear, goody-two-shoes personified instead. It took me some time to notice his wavering attention but when I did, I was at my vilest point. Jealousy reared its ugly head. And stupidity. I acted like I owned him. I would throw tantrums, taunt him, find ways to intervene in their growing friendship, made my cousin Gunjan feel inferior, etcetra. To summarize, I was the vamp attempting to distance two innocent and good people.

Terrible, I know. But don't hate me yet. Karma did bite back. Sort of.

While I was still reeling with the "love" I harboured for Sammy, a new boy made an appearance.

[No, not Guru. He was just arm-candy for one day.]

Enter Ranvijay! A villainous cliche. Or as I like to call it - heartbreak part 2 [also read: Stage 2 of stupidity].

His wickedness was quite apparent. Sadly, not something the past me noticed. He treated me like the princess I thought I was, so no wonder I swooned in his love.

In brief, he wanted to "use" me initially but as time progressed and I slapped him when he picked on a fight with my dear Sammy [the only moment of clarity I had], he wanted revenge as well. So, what did His Highness, Ranvijay too-cool-for-everybody do? He lured me out in the rain one day and proffered an accommodation in the form of his mansion where I could change my dress. Sweet, if not for what he did the next day.

The next day when he insulted and maligned my character in front of everybody in College as I got down on one knee to accept his proposal of being his girlfriend, it was my rising-from-the-ashes-like-a-phoenix moment. The old Dia died a humiliating death and in her place was a Dia who in that one moment, sobered up; she became more humane, more real, more mature. That's what I needed, that dosage of cruel reality.

Thank God for that.

Because if that hadn't happened, I would have forever been on my high horse. Most importantly, I would have stayed ignorant of Mr. Right.

Once I got rid of my shallow, superficial exterior, it became easier to find love. But love happened with someone I never expected; it was someone I found excruciatingly annoying and pesky. Pretty much how I thought of mosquitoes.

Love became synonymous with...

My semi-friend Benji.

Before all the drama, I viewed Benji as Samrat's sidekick; an extension of him nobody cared for much, least of all me. He was accepted within the clan simply because he was Sammy's friend.

But how the Mighty fall, and fall in love with the irritating sidekick.

Post my heartbreak part 2, he started out as the old Benji but unbeknownst to me, he was slowly becoming more than that. Maybe, it happened the day itself, when he stood up for me even when I never vocalized that he was a friend. Along with others, he stood up for me, and took care of me, and made me laugh when I didn't think I could. In fact, with time he became the funniest person I had ever known, who always made me laugh, made me happy. Insanely so. The Benji of my illusions disintegrated and I saw the real one. The Benji who was the best, most loyal of friends. Who despite all the attention that Samrat garnered, wasn't ever jealous of him. Who was always there for his friends. Who was caring and kind.

This Benji, I fell head over heels in love with. Who didn't fuss over me too much and ratted me out on my bullshit. Who made me feel beautiful but not in an overly cheesy, exaggerated way. Who was first my best friend before being my boyfriend. Who was human and flawed but real. And mine, all mine.

I didn't know back then but he was the only love that mattered. Ever. He loved me, and it was more than enough. It was perfect.

I am not saying he was everything I ever wanted, but he was everything I ever needed. Rather, he bickered with me quite often and had a terrible fashion sense but after a long day, when I was exhausted and drained, coming to him felt like...

~fin.