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Hold your hearts an emotional roller coaster ahead!
OS - || For HER ||
"Anika!" He called out as he searched the room.
He frowned and moved towards the pool calling out her name once again.
He stopped in track when he spotted her sitting at the rear end of the pool, against the stoned wall. Her arms were wrapped around her knees and her chin rested on her arms as she stared the the dancing lights over the swaying water on the surface. She seemed lost.
Old memories came back to his head as he made his way towards her. Memories of the first night after their wedding, the imposed wedding! He clearly remembered her tear struck face. His heart ached. He sighed he could not turn back time and correct his mistakes but he could decorate the future. Smiling slightly he walked to her. But, the thought he had come initially with surfaced.
It was about intimacy, the intimacy a husband and wife shared. Anika had been running away from that ever since. Though he knew that she cherished their closeness as much as he did, he could figure out quite obviously that there was something she was apprehensive about, something about taking their relationship to the intimacy bothered her. He had indirectly tried many times to get out her fears, but failed. Therefore he had tried to talk it out, and she had just walked away brushing off his questions with a laugh and joke. And now here she was, somewhere ...LOST...! But, where ?
He sat beside her, she dint bulge. "Anika!" He called out softly. Her arms were immediately around him. Bending her head on his shoulder she sobbed. Her arms held tightly on to him. His heart trotted uneasily, what was wrong?
He quickly held her close, wrapping his arms around her kissing her hair.
"Anika, I m here, all is fine. Mujh pe gussa ho? I m sorry Anika."
She hugged him tightly nodding in a no. After a few minutes she broke apart, staring at him. He caressed her face, worried. "I m sorry Shivaay!" She sobbed.
"You don't have to Anika, in fact its all my fault, I should have waited for you to..." He said in despair.
"Nahi." She said her arms now on his shoulder
He looked at her quizzically, "Do you want to say something. Kuch hai toh Anika, mujhe batao. I m always with you."
She smiled slightly, nodding, but her forehead had lines of worry.
After a few minutes of silence, he assumed she dint want to say anything. Come on let's go. She dint pull back her arms. He looked at her, she showed no sign of . He picked her up and walked in while she held on to him stronger than before.
Both lay sleepless staring at the ceiling. Her arms still held on to his kurta while his were wrapped around her. She was Lost somewhere. While he was at unrest. Sleep was away.
"Shivaay!"
"Hmm" he hummed gently rubbing her arms.
There is something he should know, she told him. He knew that she had been wanting to tell him something, but what that was unknown to him. He glanced at her. He was about to sit up when she prevented him to. Her gaze met his.
She quickly broke the eye lock. He knew she was struggling. He waited patiently.
"Ashram mein...light bahut jaati thii...andhera ho jaata Thaa.Bahut dar lagtaa Thaa, roti thii toh maar khaati thii!"
His heart winced in pain listening to her every word.
"Phir, ek din wo aaya, aur mujhe lekar gaya, matron Se bhi lad liya mere liye."
He stiffened listening carefully.
"Bolaa Thaa light mein leke jaayega, par..
His heart sank as she looked away into space her eyes that were in pain, now in void.
..juth bola Thaa..." She cried. "Usne bahut dard diya, god mein bithaya , mooh band kar diya thaa..chilaa bhi nahi paayi." She cried bitterly, placing her head on his chest.
He froze. His heart had almost stopped it's rhythm. A seizing pain was rising in his chest. Silent tears welled out of his eyes. He held on tightly to her. She had been abused! He was suffocating he couldn't breathe. He wanted to scream, to shout, to kill! Alas not a single muscle moved. After a few minutes he realised she was still crying, bitterly. He pulled her closer, wrapping his arms protectively around her. He wondered how broken she must be. To keep that poisonous truth within her, fighting the harsh truth, suffering for no fault of hers.
He gently started rubbing her arms, soothing her. Saying few nothings. Telling her that everything was fine and no one could trouble her anymore. He was there, FOR HER.
To protect her, to kill for her.
To preserve her dignity, to kill her demons.
To care for her, to kill all evils.
For HER.
Now he knew why she always told him to let the past be buried. Now he knew why she cried at the smallest of things, she couldn't cry when she wanted to.
He wondered how much she was filled with. How much she had fought. She was a wild warrior he knew. She had her weakness, she had her flaws and she had laid it all in front of him. She had bruises to that she had concealed, his from the world and now she had laid that as well in front of him. She had opened up every bit of her heart to him. Her miseries, her joys, her pains, her flaws, her virtues. Everything.
That told him how much she trusted him. He pledged that day to never even in his thoughts to make her regret her decision of trusting him.
"Anika, you will always remain Khidkitod Anika for me. Kuch bhi, kuch bhi, mujhe tumse dhoor nahi kar sakta. I will always be there for you!
Tumhara suraj banke, kabhi chaand banke, to kabhi jugnu banke...WO andhera kabhi tumare zindagi mein nahi lautega. Kabhi. nahi."
He placed a loving kiss on her forehead. She smiled and soon drifted to sleep hugging him. But sleep was away for him.
He kept stroking her head gently. Holding her for his dear life.
After an hour or so, he peeped at her. She had slipped into peaceful slumber. He gently laid her head on the pillow, and tucked her up in the blanket. He placed pillows on either side of her. He looked at her sleeping form and sighed. He turned to the clock, and back to her. Picking up his keys he left the room after ensuring the lamp was lit. He had to deal with the storm within him!
He kept driving, he dint know where he was going or where he wanted to go. He dint know whether he was chasing something or running away from something. Her words pricked his heart. How he wished he was there For HER then! He brought the car to a screeching hault, and got off immediately, he was suffocating. He needed to breathe. The night was dar, silent and breezy. He walked up to edge and looked down from the cliff. He ran his hand through his hair, he felt uneasy. His entire life from the day he had met her ran in front of his eyes.
"Keemat bolo apni...Check Mate, Anika, you lose." He walked away leaving her broken on the road under the pouring sky.
"Sadak ka kuda ho tum!" He spat at her.
"Tum jaisi cheap aurat nahi dehki hai, Jo shaadi se pehle... kitne mein khareeda Daksh ne tumhein?" He spoke with disgust.
"Tum mere naam ka sindoor lagaogi mere naam ka mangalsutra pehnogi,Tum mujhse shaadi karogi, ek din ke liye.Meri patni banogi!" He spoke as he fisted her hair, holding her in his strong grip, his feet on the bed beside her.
"Tum nahi jaanti mein kya kya kar sakta hoon!" He spoke menacingly.
He screamed loudly falling on his knees. He regretted it all, but the regret had just been multiplied. The pain was intolerable. How could he!? He had only added to the pain she had already hidden within her. He had been a beast to her, to the one who had only seen demons. He shouted, like a madman, he hit the ground only hurting himself in the process. "Why?" He screamed looking up at the sky. Why Her? He looked at the sky with blood shot eyes. What had she done to deserve the worst out of the world and him? She had kept saying "Two ruppee kismat" he now understood. He was in immense pain, by just thinking of it all, she had lived through that hell and come out victoriously, with that smiling bright face and ever cheerful manner
He smiled as her smiling face came before his eyes. "Kis mitti ki bani ho tum Anika!?" He whispered, his respect for her increased by multi folds. She had faced the worse and yet never cried about it, but instead spread immense positivity making everyone happy. "I Love You Anika. And will always."
The anger faded, and he picked himself up, something he had learnt from her. He looked up at the sky with a new determination, "throw whatever at us, and we will show you what WE Are!" Before reaching her things would have to face him, her Great Wall Of Shivaay.
He stepped in stealthily, and locked the door. She was sleeping peacefully. He gently replaced the pillow and slipped closer to her. Resting on the weight of his elbow, he gently caressed her forehead, and placed a kiss. Vowing to never let any harm even touch her,and fill her life with endless happiness he fell asleep holding her close in his arms.
She woke up unusually early next morning to find his arms still holding her. She smiled with tears shining in her eyes. She bent over him and kissed his forehead. How Lucky she was to have him! She was steadily moving away when he pulled her back and made her sleep. Hugging her he placed his head in the crook of her neck, still asleep. She simply hugged him back and closed her eyes.
She knew he would always be there For Her.
* * * * * *
"Anika relax, just breathe, don't close your eyes, wait - aloo poori, aloo poori imagine karo, or wait your fav song, no no your favorite movie- acha WO...WO...Gola, the ice sphere...everything will be fine!" He tried calming his wife.
She threw her head back almost giving up on her over worried husband. "Shivaay relax, main theek hoon.! She spoke placing her hand securely around her baby bump.
" I know...dard toh nahi hoga naa doctor?" He enquiried only to receive ridiculous looks from the senior doctor.
"I mean...!" He continued anxiously.
"Shivaay! " she dragged his name holding his arm. He looked over her. "Main. theek.hoon." she said looking straight into his eyes, which were now pools of worry.
"Are you sure?" His voice trailed off, as he gently ran his head over her head.
"Hum dono theek hain!" She whispered smiling admist the tears. Tears of both pain and happiness.
******
"Don't you think we should check on her? Just to be at peace knowing she is fast asleep? " he asked his wife for the third time turning to her side as they slept.
She rolled her eyes," Mr. Papa Singh Oberoi she is fine, she is 16, not 6. Ab aap chup chaap Se so jaiye warna wo aayegi Aapko check karne!"
"Very funny! " he mockingly laughed. "But,.
" Shivaay. " she said sternly that was enough for him.
"Acha waise... "He cleverly moved closer his hand encircling around her.
She grinned, " Shivaay aap ki nautanki mujhe samaj aati hai"
He simpered, and moved still closer and wrapped his legs around her, his lips inching towards her. "Acha hai, saves me of effort." He laughed.
She giggled as he tickled her rubbing his beard over her soft skin.
******
She walked dressed on high waist jeans and a flowy red top. Her gait, implying power just like her father's and her smile winning hearts just like her mother's. She was her parents perfect blend. "Heera!" She heard her name being called. She hesitatingly looked in the direction.
"We are so glad you came."
She smiled, anxiously, "I will leave early, if someone comes to know problem ho jaayegi, and I have no patience for any more Raita!"
Her friends giggled.
"I ve really got to leave, Paa ko pata chal gaya naa toh bahut gussa karenge." Heera decided to leave, she had been apprehensive about coming without permission and now could not even enjoy.
"Acha Shruti upar hai usse bye bol ke jaana." Smiled her friend hugging her.
"Cool." She reached the top of the rear stairs, not finding her friend she was about to return when her way was blocked by three men. She cautiously stepped back, analysing them. They looked drunk, they sang songs approaching her, while she moved back. God! They were three and she was one! Panic triggered within her system. Her mother's words echoed in her ear and soon courage rised. As soon as one man's hand inched towards her she punched him, but her punch landed on his cheek rather than his nose. She cursed and tried giving another blow, it was all misfiring.
She had lost all hope and was dreading what was to come." Oh God! " She had to run. No ! "Oberios never run, they face!" words echoed in her ears. But hell, running was the only way of facing the situation. But how!
"If not the straight way the crooked way!" Exactly what her dad said. She began crying and asking them to let her go as her dad was waiting downstairs. Typically like her mother.
The men started laughing, mocking her. Flipping her hair, she kicked one man and then the other. Pushing the third she sprinted to the rear staircase. She had taken a few steps down when a strong pull, dragged her behind. She yelped.
She was pushed to the wall. She cried in pain. The man approached her giving her a deadly stare. While the other two made their way to her, trapping her . She closed her eyes pushing against the wall as the man's palm approached her chin.
She opened her eyes, when nothing happened.
"Don't you dare." Rang her father's crisp voice, and a blow landed on the man's face. She sighed in relief, tears welling her eyes. She glanced on either side, there they were, her Paa and Chaachu fighting the other two men.
Shivaay quickly got to his daughter's side and took her in a protective high as she sobbed, looking down menacingly at the fallen man, who had dared to think of causing harm to his daughter.
Soon Omkara and Rudra, were by Shivaay's side, caressing Heera's head.
"Are you okay?" Asked a concerned Rudra, looking worried.
"I m okay Chaachu!" She whispered.
"Did they do something?" Asked Omkara angrily.
She simply nodded, "No, Paa!"
Shivaay wasn't ready to let her out of his embrace. She also held on to him. His heart thudding crazily. His life had been at stake. He closed his eyes, trying to calm himself, telling himself all was under control. Breaking the hug he picked up her jacket that had fallen amidst the struggle and handed it back to her. She quickly wore it, not meeting his eyes.
They walked back to the car,after doing the needful formalities. Heera hadnt left Shivaay's side for a minute nor did he let her.The men had been taken into custody and the party had been called off and the police were ordered by the Senior Oberoi to drop the teenagers back home safely and also do the needful the following morning.
Omkara quietly took the driver's seat sensing Rudra's anger. While Shivaay and Heera sat behind, at the seats extremity. Shivaay turned away looking outside. No words were exchanged, each of them were lost in thoughts of their own.
Heera wondered how upset The three of them were. She was a lucky girl who had three daddys. Alas she had disappointed three of them. She slowly glanced sideways at her father, who looked outside. She quickly turned the other way, his silence was more killing than his anger.
While Shivaay was still trying to calm himself. He had promised Anika that he would always protect her and Heera from everything. No matter what he would always be there For HER.
He took in deep breaths. He wondered how would Anika react to the situation. He dint want to be reminded of her past once again. He couldn't afford to see her break once again. No he couldn't.
He feared even thinking of what would have happened if they hadn't reached on time. He gently shifted to Heera side and held her close to his heart. She was startled but hugged him. She felt protected in his embrace. Silent tears rolled down her cheeks.
Shivaay had been experiencing an uneasy feeling, the entire time. After Anika had slept he had slipped out to check on the daughters. He had found Heera missing. He had quickly called Omkara and Rudra, and they had found her leaving in the CCTV footage. Rudra had revealed that there was some party she but she had said she wouldn't attend because Shivaay wouldn't like it. They had quickly tracked her phone down and reached the place.
Omkara pulled up the car in front of their favorite ice cream dhaaba.
"Ic-cream or Kulfis anyone?"
He got blank stares, from the others. He indicated Rudra and he replied.
"I m sorry Papa!" She finally spoke to Shivaay.
'Its alright Heera!" He said placing a kiss on her head. "Kesar Kulfi?" He asked smiling, she nodded in a yes, smiling back.
"Good , its crossed 12, now that cheat day has started, so I will have an ice cream Sunday" Spoke Rudra animatedly, causing the others to giggle.
As the sat on the wodden cots Heera noticed a wound on Omkara's hand. "Paa you are hurt!?"
Immediately, the other two men also turned to look at him.
"Ahh..no thoda saa hai theek ho jaayega. " he tried shrugging it off.
Heera quickly took the cars key from The table, "I 'l bring the first aid box!" Rudra got up immediately to go with her. She frowned looking at him. "I'll be fine Chachu!"
"Of course I know, but I forgot my phone"
She ran a scrutinizing glance at him, making sure he wasn't lying. "Are chalo yaar mere pass nahi hai meri maa, selfie bhi Leni hai naa..chal chal..!" He said turning her and walking away. Omkara and Shivaay smiled looking at them and then turned to each other, they had obviously noticed Rudra's phone in his back pocket.
"Rudra!" They chuckled, shaking their head.
Shivaay's chuckle died down.
Omkara looking at him intently-"Is there a problem Shivaay ? Sab theek hain ab...par tu..?"
"Nothing!" He said turning away. Omkara knew there was something that was still bothering Shivaay. He kept mum as he saw Rudra and Heera scuttling over to them.
"Why are you both running?" Asked a baffled Shivaay.
"I win I win!"
"No I win!"
"You cheated.!"
"No you cheated Chachu!"
"Guys, you both fight , me and Shivaay will have your share."
"No way!" The two screamed in unison. And light laughter filled the atmosphere. Taking away Heera & Rudra's ice cream was like causing World War three.
***
"We are telling no one about this!" Ordered Shivaay as they entered the Mansion.
"Not even Anika!" He turned towards Heera. She nodded.
"I m sorry! I shouldn't have...
" Yes you shouldn't have!" Completed Shivaay in a commanding voice. Omkara gently patted his elder brother's shoulder, hinting him to not be harsh.
"Do you have any idea what could have happened... Jaan chali gayi thii...!" He glared at Heera, his voice shaking.
She looked at him with her teary eyes.
"Heera we have never stopped you from doing what you like, but if we say a NO to something its for your good.." Spoke Omkara calmly, holding the girls hand. She nodded.
"I agree!" Said Rudra simply.
"I m sorry." She cried. " I promise I won't do anything like this again.Pinky. Promise." Omkara and Rudra took her in a group hug but Shivaay turned the other way.
Heera looked at him downhearted.
"Shivaay!" Called Omkara.
"Bhaiya!" Rudra tried gaining Shivaay's attention but Shivaay dint bulge.
Heera walked up to him and stood before him. "I m Sorry!" She spoke whimpering, holding her ears. "Please."
He could stay angry longer. His daughter had said Sorry( and Please). And if she said that, he knew she meant it. He knew she was much like him, she would grope for words to express what she felt. He held her hands, "I just want you to know, tum humaari Jaan ho, if something happens to you..." He couldn't even complete.
Omkara came forward, "Heera, next time you have a confusion, when you don't know what to do, whether to do something or not, simply close your eyes and ask yourself just one question will your parents be happy if you do it, if its a yes then go ahead and do it the right way, if the answer is a No, you have the answer!"
The philosopher with his simple words had brought astounding smiles on the faces of the trio.
Shivaay hugged her, smiling, "Hey, big girls don't cry okay! "
"Exactly," commented Rudra putting a hand around Shivaay's shoulder.
"Thank You, " she whispered switching her glance from one to another. "I have the best daadys of the world. Omkara and Shivaay gently wiped her tears from either side. She giggled lightly.
"Guys let's sleep before the house wakes up!" Chuckled Omkara putting his arm around Heera.
"Thank God, I thought we would have O Jagraata tonight!" Teased Rudra.
"Shut up Rudra. " exclaimed Omkara trying to stretch his hand across to Rudra's head.
"Shhh!" The father-daughter duo silenced the two brothers.
While she disappeared to change, Shivaay walked up to Ahaana's bed and pulled the blanket up her. OmRu smiled at the sight. "Like father like daughter! You used to do the same Om!" Shivaay turned to him.
"...and you used to come and do the same !" Om said pointing at the blanket. Shivaay smiled.
"You knew?"
"Caught you a couple of times , secretly though !" He chuckled silently.
"...and Rudra ...his blanket would be up.." Omkara added,
"...and he down!" Completed Shivaay giving Omkara a silent high-five.
Rudra knotted his brows, pretending to not have heard, "Guys...Shh..she is sleeping." He commanded. With twitched up eyebrows the two looked at him silently laughing.
Once they made sure she was tucked in bed and all okay, they wished her goodnight and left.
They sighed stopping at the diversion of the corridor.
"Don't worry shivaay she will be fine!" Reassured Omkara.
"She is !" Corrected Rudra.
"I know !" Sighed Shivaay.
"Okay then..
Good Night!
Caused I don't want dark circles beneath my eye.
Did that rhyme!!?" Sang Rudra.
The other two chuckled.
"Wait, your room is this way dumbell!"
"I won't be able to sleep, without knowing she is fine...I will sleep on the couch in their room. Don't worry I will disappear before BhaabhiS wake up."
"But Rudra,..."
"Its fine Om , Good Night Rudra!" Wished Shivaay.
Rudra quickly pecked his brothers' cheeks and left.
Shivaay-"You know, how protective he is about them!"
Om-"absolutely...but...I mean he has to have kids of his own too, how long can he live with memories!"
Shivaay-"I know..ever since Bhavya left, he has been broken. He doesn't show it but holds the pain in his heart. Bhavya has made him strong Om, she is a part of him now. I think we should give him some more time."
"How much more, Shivaay? Aren't eight whole years enough. " I know Ahaana and Heera are his daughters as much as ours but..."his voice trailed off and he sighed.
Shivaay patted on his shoulder-"Get some sleep! Its been a long day. Everything will sort out in the end."
Omkara stopped him by his hand. "What is it?"
Shivaay-"What?"
Om-"That's Bothering you! "
Shivaay -"I m okay." He pressed his lips into a smile.
Om-"please. Shivaay. Kuch hai. I can see it and sense it!"
Shivaay sighed. "I..am ...was just scared for her."
Omkara-"is that all?" He just got an affirmative nod.
Shivaay-"I 'll tell you, if I need to. You know right?"
Omkara nodded not half convinced.
"You should tell at least Anika Bhaabhi about it." Asserted Omkara.
"No "came his brother's sharp reply.
" She is her mother, she needs to!" Explained Omkara.
"NO."
"I don't..." Continued Omkara arguing.
"I don't want her to go through what I went through in the past few hours. She has faced too much, I can't give her another bruise to live with" his voice trailed off as his eyes turned moist.
There was a certain pain in Shivaay's voice that Om couldn't fathom. He had been scared too, Heera was in no way less than Ahaana for him, in fact Heera was way closer to the three brothers being the elder one. But a certain ambiguity remained. He realised he had reached his room, contemplating. Sighing he slipped beside his wife. Smiling at her he slipped into slumber.
Shivaay quietly stepped inside, and quickly changing got beside her. As if on cue she turned in sleep and placed her hand on him and snuggled closer to him. He gently stroke her arm, looking at her. "I m sorry Anika, I can't tell you. But, I promise I will always keep my promise. Come what may to the two of you, it will have to face me first. I promise, I will always be there For You, and For HER!
****************
Dedicated to all The Women Out There!
Go Womaniyaa!
****************
Note:-
Whoosh! That went longer ...!
In the last to last week, I had watched about child abuse and what not in a reality show, and then another movie the next day. Not left me shaken. Its so hard for me to even say, about how I felt.
Its so sad that the statistics are so bad about girl child abuse!
I had planned of posting it last week, but see the day today Children's Day! So this children's day let's do the little we can do so that no child is deprived of Childhood. We can start this from our very own home by educating our house helps. A small action and it grows to a better society!
So many have been victims and yet they walk with a smile on their face. Respect, is what I have for them.
I m so grateful that I m so protected where I am, my gratitude shall never be enough.
Let's respect each other as women,
We don't know the journey of the woman right beside us, from where and through what she has been, how many masks has she put on!
Let us respect each other,
Be by each other,
Understand each other,
And stand up for ourselves and each other.
I'm really bad at putting my own thoughts into words, so pardon me for these oddly put words.
Lastly,
Be Strong, Be Courageous,
Respect Yourself and those who are always there for you,
Be You!
"Moon dust in your lungs, Stars in your eyes, You are a child of the cosmos, The ruler of the skies!"
Mr And Mrs Parshuram
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