Posted:
I know the entire forum is flooded with yesterday's confession and you guys are probably tired to see me coming up with yet another Shivay-confession post but I swear, I had refrained myself from making any post until I realized that I won't be able to work with a sane mind if I do not say these few things about yesterday's episode.
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"Sunogi na? Forward maath karna kyunki jo saab main bolne wala hoon, important hai..."
My heart skipped a few beats at the desperation he showed in his eyes... desperate to let her know how much this bitter sweet journey means to him. Desperation to be assured that she is able to see through his heart, because what if his words fall short to express what he wanted to pour out? Desperation to let her know how insanely her existence in his life mean to him...
"Tumne notice kiya? Main bina cringe kiye gobar bol raha hoon... gobar gobar gobar gobar gobar..."
🤣
I have never seen anyone being so proud of themselves for being able to say gobar without making a face..HUGE accomplishment😆
On a serious note though, did you guys notice how beautifully he has blended into Anika? He's been literally using her dictionary with all the "michmichi...gobar..and tadi" repetition within one line , that too when she's not even infront of him, and he looks so nonchalant about the terms and so confident with his speech. He's not Pinky's "all the relationships in this world is a deal" beta, not the successful business tycoon who has to think twice about his reputation before speaking, not the naam-khoon-khandan layered man, not the "rock hard with multiple baggage" Shivay anymore...He is just Anika's Shivay now...His nonchalant attitude says nothing BUT that!
"Kya kuch karna pada hai tumhare liye, haan anika?"
When you love a person to the point where your own life doesn't matter to you anymore, the gravity of the endearment becomes so strong that it pulls you inward with such force and leave you in an incomprehensible phase where even you don't even realize to what extent you can and have gone for her, until you actually sit back and play those incidents on a loop. And it will nothing but make you question yourself, "how did I even gotten myself to fall so hard for you?!"
Yesterday when I saw him going over the flashback and ask what he had done for her, his emotions, his eyes and his body language nothing but screamed all that (^). The beauty and the magnitude of the moment gave me goosebumps...
"Toot tum rahi thi na Anika...Lekin bikhar main raha tha..."
Did anyone else feel like a much needed loop had been closed through this confession? That day when he had given her the cheque, I only saw hatred in his eyes for her, a ferocious competitiveness that he has to be ahead of her no matter what! Yes he had kept looking on the rare view mirror at how she broke down on the street, but I for one, never felt that it had struck him with such power at that time that just the mare glance of her breaking down had him splintering into fragments inside... What a beautiful confession!
"Main chahraha tha ki tum utho and fight back karo...utho and fight back"
I don't know about others, but one thing has been assured to me by this line, that whatever challenge he had thrown upon her in the past, a tiny part of his heart always hoped AND made sure that she has the power to stand up and fight back...May be it was too insignificant to be even aware of but it was always there. And so, that day in the rain when he had given her the cheque and she had broken down, never attempting to get up with the confidence to fight the battle, no wonder it had triggered such fear inside him and he wanted her to fight with him, regardless of the fact that he had always been a man who loves winning, by hook or by crook.
"You made me the luckiest man Anika...I feel like the luckiest man in this world today".
I wish I had the power to stop the world and pull him out of the screen and hug him until I feel myself calmed down...because at this point, I felt like I was going insane with the overwhelming emotions that had started to pile up inside me since he had started talking. I just couldn't take it anymore...he just transformed from being all smiley and happy to so serious because the beauty of the reality that she had indeed blessed his life with her existence and made him the luckiest man was so inordinate...so overwhelming..so massive..and so powerful!
"You know pehli bar jab tum meri baho mein giri thi, pehli bar mujhe tumhe khone ka daar tha,..bata nahi kyun aisa laga ki agar main tumhe kho diya to kcu garbar ho jaye ga..dunya sahi nahi lage gi...First time I felt for someone outside my family and it was you!"
Let me also make a confession: This was my FAVORITE confession of the day. Nothing can ever beat that! I just couldn't digest the fact that he had felt something as powerful as this during a stage when their relationship didn't even get to blossom properly. He was the SSO with so many baggage and layers, who wanted something totally different from what Anika wants from the world, their priorities were chalk and cheese to each other, he couldn't even stand her, and yet he felt such heavily-built sentiment seeing her unconscious in his arms...
These small building blocks have led him to reach a point where now, he can't stand a single tear in her eyes and he feels like his breathing with all its royalty halts when she's not around him! Gawd, the beauty of his journey man...I just can't seem to find proper words to describe what magnitude his confession has dared to strike my heart with!
"tumne hamesha ek biwi hone ki sare farz nibhaye...ek bahu hone ki sare farz nibhaye...kabhi apna haq nahi manga..kabhi aapna haq nahi jataya"
While he was confident that probably the only woman who's capable of doing all that, regardless of all the obstacle she had to face due to his mom and in a way, him as well, is her, he seemed to still couldn't comprehend how immensely selfless this woman could be and what a heart she must own that she accomplished every single role with flying colors! And his eyes and tone nothing but screamed his significant respect and pride of this woman he feels blessed to claim as his!
And then finally, "Insaan ko tumse pyaar na ho to kya ho yaar?!"
You know when we are asked to write a persuasive essay in our English class and we first state what we think is right and then in the body paragraphs, we start throwing in all the facts and evidence and quotes to support our thesis and then finally conclude that yes, that is exactly why I support what I support? After running through all the flashbacks, I felt just that when he finally said that what else is he supposed to do other than loving her (after what she has done FOR him and TO him)
That desperation again reflects in his eyes to make her aware that she left him with no choice but to love her to an extent even he is unable to comprehend...
Hands down, this is the most mesmerizing confession in the history of Ishqbaaaz as well as Indian Television that will have its aftereffect last till god knows how long! I'm literally in awe to find the right words for the scene! IB writer, producer directer, Nakuul Mehta and Surbhi Chandna, you guys are the winner for me...My belief that IB is the most deserving of all the awards they have been fetching thus far, got only stronger after yesterday's episode.
Love,
Mushfika
Mushfika
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Anupamaa
