Memories in The Way
note: A random day in the life of Aarya
*
He was doing it again.
Aarti enters their bedroom to change, but then her step falters at the sight of Yash standing with a picture of Arpita in his hand. She recognizes the frame and her hope dashed again at the sight. She hesitated, then thought better and slowly exit; she chooses to go to the children room and wait there for she didn't know how long. It was the anniversary of her death and the date always brings sorrow to him. He will grow quieter with moments of long silence as if he was reminiscing their time. She never pries; this was a topic they never really talked about because of the tangle emotions behind it; his sense of deep loss and her insecurities about it. She dares not ask for fear of hurting him so when the time comes she let him be and gives him space. Once the date passed, he would be back to his old self as if nothing has happened. Hearing the children chatters, Aarti enters the space that has become a play room with toys, bookshelf and other games; with the birth of Aayu, who was now three, they have decided to separate them and redecorate two new rooms to their wishes. Despite this, they always seemed to congregate in the old room out of habit, at least for Ansh and Aayu was into mimicking big brother; Ansh was only too happy to take him under his wing. Aarti believe that her children like to be in each other company; Yash would smirk that it was for the games but she was sticking to that happy thought.
"Mama, you're back, already", Palak said surprise
"Yes babies, can I join you", Aarti replies
"Of course Mama, but you know that we are not babies anymore", Ansh said
Aarti falsely pout, "you don't want to be my babies anymore?"
"Offo, Mama, it's not that, but we are growing up and Aayu is the baby now", Aayu giggle at the mention of his name, going to his Mama.
"Well, in that case, I'll only kiss and hug my little darling boy", she said kneeling down to Aayu and showering him with kisses; he laughs in delight.
"Mama, I will always be your baby, can I get a huggy kiss too", Payal asks her arms on Aarti neck.
"Of course, my sweet angel", Aarti said and from the corner of her eyes, she saw Ansh and Palak looking at each other's torn between maintaining a grown-up attitude and wanting to be hugged by their Mama. She decides to help them, "my two young babies are sweet, but I would be so happy if their elders' siblings would make this sacrifice and help Mama from the little one attack, I can't get up".
"Hum, ok Mama, but just because we want to help you", Ansh said to which Palak eagerly agrees.
Aarti found herself engulfed in pairs of arms, lips kissing her and hand tickling her. She laughs out loud with sheer pleasure of sincere emotion. Thank god for her children. They have been her saving grace when time was difficult, uncertain and confusing.
"Okay, okay, enough, I thought you were helping me up", she said trying to get back up. She finally managed to sit on the armchair, the girls on each side, Aayu in her lap and Ansh in the seat facing them.
"So what are you guys doing here, are you done with your homework", Aarti asks looking at Palak and Ansh
"No, but we came here to pick up some books and stayed", Palak answers knowing they were in trouble
"You got distracted. Kids, you know the room is not allowed until school work is done", Aarti scolds
"I know Mama, but papa was not coming and he usually helps with math problems", Ansh defended
"That's not an excuse Ansh, if papa is busy I can help you with your homework. So, next time call or wait for me, okay. I don't want to have to repeat myself understand"
"Yes Mama", Ansh and Palak respond
"Mama; why haven't you changed your clothes", Palak asks a moment later
"What do you mean, Palak"
"You said you were going to change your clothes, because Aayu spill his milk on you"
"Oh, yes, hum, I'll do it later. It's almost dry anyway", Aarti brushes off her clothes in discomfort
"Is Papa still in the room with Arpita-Ma picture", Palak said
"Palak? How do you know that?" Aarti asks caught off guard
"I saw him, Mama", she answers
"Oh, huh he is just cleaning his stuff"
"Mama, I know its Arpita-Ma anniversary of when she left and papa get really sad", she adds quietly her eyes looking at the floor.
Aarti observes her daughter closely, Palak was sometimes too mature for her age. She had that in common with Ansh and that's probably why they get along so well. She has been affected as much as Yash when she lost her mother and for a long time, she carried the guilt of thinking it was her fault. Aarti heart had hurt at first then rejoiced when she was able to break through the strong wall Palak put up to shield herself. Aarti put her hand on her chin and gently turn her face toward her, "do you miss her baby", she softly asks.
Palak stiffened, then shrugs her shoulder, "I don't know", she said lowering her head down again, her feet swinging, a sign of distress. Aarti understood that she was sparing her feeling in her own way. The other kids were silently listening,
"Palak, you won't hurt me if you miss her. She is your Mama too", Aarti said to reassure her.
"Sometimes I talk to the picture you gave me"
"I am glad and if you want to talk to me about Arpita-ma, I am here", Aarti said
"Mama, it doesn't mean I don't love you", Palak said
"I know princess and I am grateful", Aarti comforts her
"I am glad you are here Mama and Ansh Bhayia too. It's better this way", Palak said
Aarti felt her heart warmed and tears filled her eyes, "thank you, baby, I am also glad to be here with all of you. I am the luckiest mother to have such wonderful children".
Palak turns to look at Aarti, "and Papa too, Mama. He likes it"
Aarti gasps, leave it to kids to get to the heart of the matter. She suddenly felt lighter. Indeed, she was married to a wonderful man, had great kids and a good life; so he needed to retreat and reminisce on lost memories, that was fine because loving someone meant also allowing them to be.
"I am so proud of you, children and I love you. Now let's go finish your homework, you two".
In Aarya Bedroom
Yash had put back the picture in the drawer after a lengthy conversation with Arpita. He senses someone earlier, but when he turns around, he didn't see anyone. He really didn't want to hurt or confuse Aarti with his confession to Arpita. He doesn't do it often, but at the anniversary he feels the need to talk to her; not in a nostalgic, heart-wrenching way like in the beginning, but as a sweet memory in honor of her having birthed him, two wonderful children.
Flashback earlier
"Hello my darling, hope you are well. It's been a long time since we talked. Are you well? Silly question, of course you are well. Although, you would have been fine here too. I know HE has plans but it's sometimes very difficult to keep the faith; don't worry I haven't turn miscreant and always trust in HIM. The children are fine; they are thriving under great care. You would be proud of our girls, Arpita, so loving and well behave. Don't get me wrong, they also have their moments, but that's okay, they are building their character. As for me its work and family. You know me, I can get consumed with work but I have been told in no uncertain words to better managed my time or miss out on my family. I know that of course, but I guess I needed reminder despite, ...despite swearing after you left to never be neglectful again and I am trying to not fail. Ma, Pa, Pankaj, Vidhi, Prateek are ok too."
A silent moment
"I am avoiding it, aren't I. Aarti. My wife. I don't know why Arpita, but I wanted to tell you that I am happy. Happier than I have been in years after your loss. She is sweet, wonderful with the kids and we now have two sons. I never told you this but I behaved poorly when we were first married but then I thought I was betraying you. That was stupid, I know that know but I used to think that you owe it to your first love to remain faithful forever. How nave of me; we were so young. I love her Arpita, like a mature man can love a woman, deeply and passionately. I am not asking for permission, but you have been a good part of my life and gave me two beautiful girls, I don't want to you to become a distant memory. Although, you don't have to worry about that with the girls, Aarti make sure they remember you. I am rambling, I know, but soon we will celebrate out fifth anniversary and I am happy and I hope you are too. I have to let you rest now Arpita, thank you for having been in my life".
End Flashback
*
Today is our fifth-year wedding anniversary, coincidentally close to the dreaded reminiscence of Arpita time. She can't believe she was married to Yash, for five years now and every one of those years has been memorable, to say the least. From the unknown to trying to conform to the Scindhia way, the hurtful rejection from him, to the unexpected pregnancy, to love and going back to work. It has been eventful, Aarti reflects. She was coming from a meeting with a client when someone grabs her hand and pulls her toward her bedroom. Out of surprise, she wasn't able to utter a word or called out a halt and found herself thoroughly being kissed.
"Where have you been?", Yash demands after releasing her
"Hum, to work", Aarti answers still flustered
"But you took so long", Yash protests
"Yash, you are not making sense", Aarti pointed out
"I was waiting for you", he said
"Why? did something happened to the kids, Ma, Bauji...", Aarti asks panicking
"No, nothing like that, the kids are fine and so is everybody else", Yash cuts her off
"Then what?" she asks annoyed, "you scared me"
"I just miss you"
"Oh", she simply said
"Where were you last night", he demands
"With the kids, I was helping them with their homework and then putting them to bed. The girls wanted me to stay a little longer and we just fell asleep", she explained.
Yash stares at her intensely, "you saw me talking to Arpita. That why you did not come back to bed"
"You didn't come to me either", she shot back, hurt
"I know and I am sorry", he softly said
"Hum, huh, it's okay, I understand"
"What?"
"You ... you needed to remember and celebrate her memories"
"I did", he confirms
Aarti felt her heart pierce even though she did understand. After all, her girls put things in perspective. Palak talks about her time with her Arpita-Ma and all the thing they did together and how sad she was when she was suddenly gone. But now bagwan has gave her another Mama and she loves that because they can play dress up, kissy kissy and help with school parties or have birthday parties. Payal who was also lying down on her chest and was, as usual her sweet silent self, but every time she was near Aarti she felt the need to touch her; she did not remember Arpita but she felt the loss nonetheless. Aarti didn't mind because she understands loss and her love, for her girls, was indisputable and she would do anything for them.
"Aarti?", Yash called
Aarti re-focus on Yash, "she was your first love", she states matter of fact
"Yes, she was", he agrees
"I am fine, Yash. You don't need to worry about me, I am fine with it"
"I know you are, but I want to explain"
"You don't have to", she said
"Please, bear with me". Yash walks her to the couch and sat facing each other. "First, I want you to know that I love you very much, you are my wife and there is no doubt in my mind that I will love you forever"
"You said that about Arpita. You don't need to reassure me by saying this", she said remembering past turmoil.
"I know I did", he answers
"So what was yesterday", Aarti asks
"I guess it was sort of a goodbye. I was very young when we got married and had she not died we would probably still be together", seeing Aarti flinch, "I am not saying that to hurt you, but I am a dutiful son. I don't rebel, follow parents' wishes, basically my life was set. So, when they arranged our union, I fully committed and swore to her that she will always be my one and only"
"And now", Aarti whispers
"And now, I needed to sort out my guilt"
"Because you love me", Aarti said
"Yes, well no, ...".
"Which is it?", Aarti demands, starting to get annoyed
"I wanted to apologize for betraying her"
"I see." Aarti said coldly
"Aahh, that's not what I meant, I am not doing this well", he said frustrated
Aarti stood up, now angry, "you got that right, Yash. I will remove my betrayer face from you. I thought we were past that. I don't need this. You lied to me when you said you loved me, you just want me to stay and take care of the children. You don't have to worry about that, I love the girls and I will never leave them physically or emotionally unlike their father who ignored them in his griefs".
"I did not", Yash yells, getting angry too
"Didn't you? You abandoned them to Vidhi and Ma refused to celebrate their birthdays and punished them for the loss of their mother. Why did you think Palak resist love for so long because she thought she was the reason her mother was gone and was punishing herself out of guilt?"
"I didn't...", he started
"...know; of course, not, you were too wrapped up in your pain to notice anything, you selfish, self-centered man", Aarti shouts at him
"I am not. I took care of them, you're the one who manipulated their feelings by impersonating Arpita"
"And you humiliated me and apparently never forgave me; I see that now. Well, I am not trying to be her; I may have been misguided in my intention, but I was trying to help a hurt little girl. Can you say the same?"
"How dare you, I lost my wife", he shouts
"Oh I know, but you are not the one who has exclusivity on hurt. I am done; done being treated this way, done walking on eggshell around you every time the topic of saint Arpita comes up. Now deal with that", she defiantly said
"You're not her", Yash shot back furious at Aarti accusations
Aarti was wounded by the unfair remark, "yes at least you got that right" she shots back and left the room furious.
Yash remains motionless, baffle, wondering what has just happened with Aarti. He meant to tell her that he didn't need Arpita picture anymore, but the conversation took on another meaning and totally off track. One thing was sure; she was a spitfire when she was mad and not afraid to say her mind. Has he unknowingly blame his girls for the loss; worse put Arpita so high on a pedestal that he was about to ruin his current relationship.
*
Aarti was fuming, she needed to get out and scream her rage. How dare he diminished her to Arpita. The woman ghost was still around and did she complain; no. So, what more did he want from her?
"Ouch", Vidhi said when Aarti bump into her and almost fell.
"Oh, sorry Vidhi", Aarti apologizes helping her to regain her balance and one look at Aarti angry face, "what's wrong", Vidhi asks
"What else, Arpita", Aarti shot back
"Ah"
"Ah, Ah, that's all you have to say"
"I thought this was resolved", Vidhi replies back
"So did I", she involuntary shouts
"Let's go outside, you need to let it out", Vidhi orders
"I am fine", she grumbles
"Of course", Vidhi replied, pushing Aarti toward the front door, not giving her a choice. Once outside, she beckons Aarti to scream her heart out, which she did.
"Better?"
"Maybe", Aarti said
"What did he do?"
"Reminisce in from of her portrait again", Aarti said dejected
"And that bothers you?", Vidhi asks
"No, of course not, well only a little, but the girls' kind of help me put things in perspective the other day; she is part of their life and I have learned to accept that. I fell asleep with the girls yesterday, not to avoid him, but they needed to talk about the time with their Mama. Today, when I get home from work, he unceremoniously dragged me to our room, thoroughly kissed me", to which Vidhi raise an eyebrow smirking, "no need to smirk because it went downhill from there when he started explaining that he was apologizing to his great love, Arpita, like I needed that".
"And what did you do?"
"Hum, I told him to choose; her or me, I think"
"You think?"
"Among other things," Aarti continued
Vidhi laughs, "good for you, I was wondering when you were going to lose patience"
Aarti eyed her in surprise, "look I love Arpita and she made Yash happy, but now you are his wife and the mother of his children. He spent a lot of time trying to come to terms with the loss. Now he needs to be more considerate of your feeling"
"The girls need to keep a memory of their mother; I am fine with that. I have not interfered whenever the anniversary of her death come; I haven't complained, so why is he twisting the knife in".
"Aarti, you know Yash, is it possible that he jumbles his thoughts", Vidhi asks
"How so, I mean he didn't denied missing her and worse he's feeling guilty about his feeling for me", Aarti said sadly
"Think about it, remember when he tried to confess that he loved you, he ended up drunk and incoherent; what about when you were pregnant, despite wanting you he thought again that you wouldn't want that and messed up"
"But we are passed that"
"Yes, and that is why I am sure he misspoke"
Aarti thoughts for a moment, "you think so?" she asks hopefully
"I know so. He is so used to you understanding things he keeps inside that maybe he thought this time too, you'll understand the words not said"
"That is not fair, I have feelings too", Aarti sulks
"True, you are also jealous"
"Vidhi!! I am not", Aarti denied
"Are so"
"Ok, maybe a little, but that is so petty", Aarti said a little ashamed
"She is gone and you are here", Vidhi blurt out
"That's harsh"
"Don't be coy, true nonetheless. And you want Yash undivided attention"
"Is that wrong?", she asks in a small voice
"Of course not. Go talk to him"
"Now? No maybe tomorrow. Let him stew for tonight", Aarti decides
"Again? After last night"
"Well, it's not like he missed me since I woke up in the kids' rooms. So yes"
"Aarti, that is childish, but I suppose you know what you are doing", Vidhi sighs
"I love you Vidhi", she said hugging her
"Right, you children are such a handful", she teases
"That is why we need guidance from our mature and wonderful more experience elders"
"Buttering me, shame on you. Now come on, let's go prepare the guest room and you'll need some clothes to sleep in, since I suppose you won't go back to your room", to which Aarti laughs mischievously, feeling much lighter.
*
Meanwhile, Yash was pacing in frustration in his room
"What did you do now? Why can I enjoy my wife little brother", Pankaj asks deadpan having come to his brother's bedroom.
"Why do you ask?" Yash asks suspiciously
"Because your wife and mine are in pow wow about something, and usually it means you did something to Aarti", Pankaj sighs
"I did not", Pankaj raises one eyebrow waiting, "okay, maybe I did involuntarily hurt her and led her to believe that I was still in love with Arpita"
Pankaj shook his head in dismay, "oh Yash, again"
"I swear Pankaj, it's not that. It's a misunderstanding. I was just trying to explain why I was talking to her picture"
"Do you miss her"
"Yes, but not like you think"
"Do you still love her"
"No, yes, it's complicated"
"So which is it? Are we back to Yash pinning for Arpita again", Pankaj asks
"No, of course not", Yash denied
"Then what?"
"I am happy, Pankaj"
"So, what's the problem"
"Truly happy"
"Ah"
"Yes"
"Do you need my help to translate your words", Pankaj teases
"Bhayia, please, respectfully, leave it to the expert", Prateek said entering the room, having caught the last part of the discussion
"Not you too", Yash groans
"Bhayia, did you forget who got you together with Aarti. Had I left it to you, I will still be chasing after Pari to convince her that I am not putting off the proposal, but my dear Bhayia was still dragging his feet at the mention of marriage".
"It's not a joke Chote", Yash scolds
"I am very serious", Prateek said, "now tell love guru, what did you do to my gundee bhabhi", he mocks
"Nothing"
"Right, that's why she storms off straight into Vidhi bhabhi and venting outside like she wants to rip someone's head off", he smirks
"Oh, okay," Yash gave up, sitting back in the chair, he closes his eyes for a moment, "she misunderstood me".
"Explain, please", Prateek said
"Well, I... I was just..."
"He was talking to Arpita, again", Pankaj cuts through the hesitation
"Oh, Bhayia, why?"
"It was the anniversary of her death; I was just paying respect to her memory. She was a good wife, bore me two children and deserve better than to be forgotten", Yash explained.
"No one is asking you to forget her, but why didn't you ask Bhabhi to help you with arranging the prayers' ceremony", Prateek asks
"I didn't think she would want to, she usually let me by myself to reflect", Yash answers
"Yash, did you think, that maybe she didn't want to intrude", Pankaj said
"Or that she was waiting for a sign from you that you needed her during that time", Prateek adds, "Bhayia, my gundee bhabhi takes care of everybody, make sure that we are all alright, looks after Ma & Bauji, help Vidhi and guide Pari. You know that she keeps Arpita memories alive for the girls, mostly Palak who missed her the most. It means that she is not threatened or hurt by that unless you make her feel that way"
"I was not trying to exclude her"
"Didn't you?" Pankaj asks, "Yash when Arpita was brutally taken from you, we all missed her and I know you came to care and loved her but you act like you were the only one who lost her; Ma was in pain and Vidhi lost a sister too, Yash"
Yash looked stricken, "I'm sorry"
"I am not looking for an excuse or saying this to hurt you, Yash, you have suffered a huge lost and if it was Vidhi, I don't know what I would have done, All I am saying is that you need to fully let Aarti in, it will not diminish the feeling you had for Arpita".
"Bhayia, remember when she helps me when I couldn't talk to you about Pari wanting to work and lied to you. You would have been furious and dismissed me for weeks had it not been for Aarti Bhabhi. She doesn't need big words or shiny things; she just need you"
"I need her too", Yash said
"Well then, go tell her, Vidhi probably calmed her down by now", Pankaj smiles
"She gets so incensed when crossed or angered", Yash smiles fondly
"Don't I know it, I remember the bat threat to this day", Prateek shuddered
"She's magnificent when angry, a poem does not do her justice, I need to find something grand", Yash murmurs to himself
Pankaj and Prateek exchange a look ", hum Bhayia, how about simple and no mushy poem, nor grand gesture this time"
"What are you saying", Yash said
"Simple, Bhayia, simple", Prateek reiterates shaking his head and making a pleading gesture with his hands together.
*
The next morning
Yash woke up angry. The more he thought about it, the angrier he got. How dare Aarti abandoned the marital bed. Again. Having found no sleep, tossing and turning all night did not put him in the best of mood. He took a shower annoyed, got dress angrily and by the time he got to breakfast he was fuming. And here she was, fresh as a daisy, serenely serving the food like nothing was wrong. She was his wife and should not have deserted the marital bed. Yash irately ate his breakfast, frustrated by her behavior, but also trying to remain civil in front of his parents. He notices a look between Ma and Vidhi; were they mocking him, Aargh. Why was he the bad guy; he did not leave the conjugal room. And she was still not talking to him aside from the formal hello Yash. He got no sweet smile, light loving touch or special treats. After a moment, she sat in her seat near him and continued to ignore him, under the pretense of feeding the kids. He had enough of this lack of respect. He stood up.
"I have to go, Bauji are you coming", Yash asks aggravated
"But...", SP started to say that he was not scheduled early at the office today when Gayatri subtly stop him with her foot
"Ji, don't forget you have to pick up the package for me from Ramuji sir. And please you two, drop the kids to school. I need the second car and driver today for the Pooja preparation.
"Hum, oh, okay. Then let's go Yash. Bachoo come on, let's go", Bauji calls
"Okay. Bye Mama, bye everybody", they said. After the shuffling and ruffling of picking lunch and school bags, silence filled the room when they left.
"Aarti", Gayatri calls
"Yes, Mumiji"
"What have you done to my son", Gayatri seriously inquiries with a hint of a grin
"Nothing, Mumiji, I swear", Aarti quickly answers
"Well, at least, Bauji, will be driving or I fear he might step on someone with the fume coming out of his ears".
Aarti blushes, "I..I..."
"I am sure you are in your right beta, but there is more than one way to catch a fly"
"Mumiji!?"
"What, I was young once", she continues seriously, to which Vidhi laughs heartily, Pankaj and Prateek, groans considering this too much information also quickly left for their respective occupations, besides listening to their mother supposed sex life was definitely not part of the deal. "So as I was saying, running away won't solve the problem, bahu"
"I know, Mumiji, I was just so angry and didn't think", Aarti confesses
"Didn't you", Gayatri rose an eye
"He is so frustrating sometimes Ma"
"I am sure he is. Aarti, this time used to be a very difficult time for him; he would withdraw to the point of depression but it's no longer the case. Now the girls, especially Palak, can talk about Arpita without guilt, Yash has come out of his shell and it's all because of you", Gayatri explains
"I didn't want to intrude during his reminiscing", Aarti finally said
"And why not?"
"It's his time with Arpita. I understand that"
"Your husband need you, my child"
"I hear you, Mumiji"
"So no more sleeping in the guest room, at the very least he should have been the one there", Gayatri smirks
"Mumiji!!!", Aarti calls shocked
"Who says that woman have to be the one to always make the sacrifice. I count on you Aarti, before he destroyed all my plates with is anger", Gayatri said, showing the dent in his plate and leaving the two bahus' alone at the table.
"Oh", Aarti exclaims
Vidhi was still laughing
"You; stop laughing at me, I am so embarrassed now"
"You should have seen your face when she mentioned the fly. She did bore and raised three healthy sons you know"
"Yeah, I gather that"
"So what's the plan"
"I guess soothe Mr. handsome ego now. Did you see how he was seething? I thought for a minute that he was going to burn a hole in me"
"Lack of sleep and unfulfilled desire will do that to anyone"
Aarti laughs, "I need to do some planning"
*
Early evening
Yash arrived later than usual. He has calmed down and was carrying a bouquet of red roses. After taking the time to think, he realized that he needed to take the cease-fire step toward his wife. He imagines the scene after offering her the flowers; her eyes would brighten in pleasure, then she'll tease him a little and jump on him to thank him and that's when he'll grab her, passionately kiss her and properly service her. His body was already tingling with pleasure. He enters their bedroom sure to find her there; she wanted to punish him the past nights, but surely she was back today, right. He enters the room only to find it dark the night light on but with no sign of Aarti; he calls her but got no answer. He could taste the disappointment. Now what. He stood there for a minute before going to his desk and setting his briefcase before carefully putting down the bouquet.
"Looking for me, jaan", he heard behind him and whirl around almost falling over at the sight of his beautiful wife in a see-through black and silver lace lingerie just above her knees, enhancing her figure.
"Like what you see?" She said seeing his mesmerized look
He shook his head up and down; Aarti reaches for the bouquet, lightly brushing him and felt him shivers, "is that for me?" Again, he shook his head
"Cat got your tongue Yash"
He shook left to right
"You are allowed to speak, you know," she teases
"You look so beautiful", he whispers
"I hope so because it took some work to attain this results," she said, showing her body up and down with her hand, in a teasing tone.
Yash put his hand forward, but Aarti softly slapped him away, "not yet Yash. Let's have dinner. It's set in the balcony". 'Dinner, what dinner, how can she think about dinner, I just want to jump her', Yash thought
Aarti smiles knowingly, "now let's get you comfortable, I got some clothes out for you. She took his hand and brought him to the dressing, motioning him to remove his suits. He complies while Aarti was raising his body temperature by helping him take off his clothes, her hands sliding along his body. He didn't even bother to hide his desire when he changes into his kurta, leaving the top open to taunt her.
"Well, I see someone is starving", Aarti said
'She did not just say that, did she. Then it's soon going to be heaven', Yash happily thought
"Come on Yashji, the food will be cold, I timed it perfectly for your arrival", 'Ugh, I'll so get my revenge', he winces
They went to the balcony; Yash still being led by Aarti.
"Have a seat, jaan"
Yash sat, taking in the decorated surrounding and lovely table setting, "It's lovely", he said
"I am glad you like it", Aarti replies lighting a mood lamp.
"Here have some, rice, and vegetable", Aarti passed him the various plates and they start eating.
"What about the kids", Yash asks
"They are fine, they sent their kisses and good night"
"So no kids tonight, just my wife and me"
"Do you need to see them; this can be arranged"
"No, not at all", he quickly replies and sent a silent prayer, 'forgive me bachoo, but Mama has plans for me, tonight'
"So how was your day", she asks getting back to a light conversation
Seriously? She wants to make small talk, okay, I'll play, "uneventful, business as usual", Yash answers
"Really, a bird told me you were brilliant today with the Mehta project"
"How did you hear about it, ah from Chote, he was in the meeting for the catering aspects"
"No", Aarti denied
"Then who", he said surprised
"That's not important, Yash"
Yash frown, "do you think I spy on you", Aarti taunts seductively
"Hum, no, no why would you"
"Why would I indeed; are you afraid I'll discover something I shouldn't", she smirks
"No, of course not, I have nothing to hide", Yash quickly denied
She laughs, "relax, I am joking. I would not do that. It just so happens that one of the businessmen around the table is an old friend of mine. He was impressed and knowing that we are married called me and mentioned that the deal was sealed".
"I wasn't doubting you", Yash defends himself
"Liar", she teases
"Okay, you had me there. I am sorry"
"No need", she smiles
"I am saying sorry for the past few days and my behavior. I know I hurt you're with my withdrawal"
"I accept your apologies", Aarti said
Silence
"So you wanted to tell me something yesterday", Aarti grew serious
"I do, but please not now. I will but tonight please let me savor my wife"
"Really, are you sure?" she insists knowing what it meant
"Yes, I want her to know that I need her and only her", he states
"I am here, all you had to do was ask", she tells him
"I am asking now", he said
"Then show me", she whispers
He slowly rises, pushes a button to set the balcony to privacy mode. Tonight, he wanted her under the bright light of the moon, reflecting on her skin. He steps behind her and start massaging her shoulder, then bent to kiss her neck. He felt her shivers and could see her breast poking out from arousal. He reaches to caress them. Aarti moans in pleasure, the friction of the silk underneath was exciting her. "You taunt me all evening with your full breasts, your slender figure", his hand reaching down to caress her legs, "your tantalizing back, deliberately swinging those hips, punishing me", "Yash...", she whispers lost in the sensations, "I am throbbing with needs", he murmurs in her ears, hands going to her treasure part to further excite her, "I am dying to make you crazy as much as you made me tonight". He slows his movement, brought her up and thoroughly kiss her, caressing her all over. He wanted to torture her for denying him the past few nights, but turnabout was fair play, she suddenly grabs him, he stumbles a little and she pushes him back on the chair and sat on him, working the tempo. "It was always my show, jaan", she whispers, tonight you are servicing me", he didn't care anymore and let her undue him until they reach their peak, both struggling but failing to remain on the chair.
Afterward, they lay on a soft mattress satisfied and exhausted
"You made me lose my mind," Yash said satisfied
"I did, indeed", she said gleefully
He laughs, "I will surrender anytime you want me to", he concedes
"Good, because I am no longer giving you a choice. You tend to drift away too much, I am here, your children need you and no more excluding me from your life, even the part you think I won't like to hear or be hurt by", she said seriously.
"Okay, I am sorry", Yash apologizes remorseful
"You better be, I was blushing through Ma lecture this morning, because of your childish moodiness", she rolls her eyes up
"What do you mean, childish, childish!! You abandoned the marital bed"
"Oh please don't exaggerate. And I didn't see you come for me. Just confess that you were happy to get your space and reminisce about Arpita"
"I was not", he disagreed
"Oh I am sure you were"
Yash pinned her down and kiss her again until they needed to breathe.
"That is still not denying the truth", she said breathlessly
"Ugh, you are relentless. If you must know I missed you, wanted you. It turns out I can no longer properly sleep without you by my side; happy", he glares
Aarti beamed, "Yes, very. But why do you make it so difficult for me to love you"
Yash reflects a moment, "truth be told, I am the luckiest man and I don't understand why".
"Why not"
"I got a second chance, and you are the most wonderful woman I do not deserve, but I will never let you go. I just needed to come to terms with promises I made to her and couldn't keep them"
Aarti beamed, wanting to bask in his words and body again, but knew that it was time for confession, "talk to me".
"At first, we were strangers, secretly I thought we were too young to get married, but our parents knew better and I follow what both families had planned. After all, Pankaj got an arrange marriage and he and Vidhi have made it work. So, I was apprehensive at first and then I realize that Arpita was too with the expectation from her parents. It actually helps us to break the ice and we became friends, afraid of the future, but determined to fulfill our duty. She was the perfect bahu, gave me two children by the time we were 25 and fit my life in a way that didn't really disturb it. I was content and loved her like I thought I was supposed to. I didn't question it, but I knew that something was missing but didn't know what. After Payal, I could see signs of Arpita needing more but I turn a blind eye, convince that our life was perfect as is", Aarti rubs his chest in comfort. "But it's never is, isn't it", he told her with sorrow in his voice.
"No, it never is", Aarti agrees
"We started having small disagreements; I couldn't understand why she was showing signs of discontent, after all, I was providing what was needed, she was fulfilling her part, or so I thought. I didn't know it at the time, but she wanted to expand outside of the household life. I am not saying she wanted to leave, but she tried to get me to listen. You know how I can be when I won't listen and she paid the ultimate price", he ends in anguish
"Yash, it wasn't your fault"
"Yes, it was, had I listened she would have had confidence in me that I would support her with her wishes. I learned later that she got a call during that fateful drive coming back to pick up the cake for Palak, she was probably over excited and not fully focus and did not see the truck coming on top of rain", Yash had tears in his eyes.
"It's not your fault", Aarti comforts him again
"It was. I was inflexible. She was a wonderful listener and wanted to help all children who didn't have the same chance as ours. I discovered that she submitted a job request to council trouble children, she had a psychology degree. She obviously couldn't talk to me and did it in secret"
Aarti hugs him, "Oh Yash, I am so sorry, it was destiny, we don't always understand it, but bagwan has plans for us"
"Maybe, but she left forever thinking I didn't want to encourage her or worse did not love her enough to do so. I was broken when I lost her but there was also guilt I couldn't admit. And it's easier to build a shrine thinking that was going to balance the thinks I couldn't do while she was alive".
"So you went on a repenting path"
"Yes and made everyone around me miserable. My family and you most of all"
"Yash from what I saw and been told, she would have made you understand eventually, she wasn't meek. She loved you, it shows in her manners and eyes"
"Prateek showed you the tapes?"
"Yes..., I didn't mean to intrude, but I wanted to understand how one person could convey such devotion. I am sorry if I step my bound, but I needed to understand and see where I fit. I guess I was a little jealous too", she adds ashamed by the admission.
"It's ok, I understand. I was closed off, making it very difficult for you to settle in. You went to a stranger's house, saddle with two kids and ordered to raise them, fit Ma ways with no help from me,"
"Yes", Aarti answers relieved that he understood.
"We were not as passionate as you and I; but I did love and respect her, Aarti"
"I know, you don't have to justify anything, I understand, believe me, I do."
"But she left first and therefore broke her vows, albeit unintentionally, but I was also angry"
"It's a normal reaction when the person you love leaves you unexpectedly, it can destroy and make you question everything"
Yash turns to face her, looking into her eyes, "I love you Aarti. I really do, you took hold of my heart and wouldn't let go. I was just paying my respects to Arpita. She gave me two beautiful girls and she will always be part of my memories, but I swear, I wasn't regretting loving you. I just thought she needed to know that her girls were happy too. I swear I will never again..."
"Don't...", she said, putting a finger on his lips to stop him, "it's not a contest Yash and you don't have to swear unrealistic promises. She was part of your life, you loved her and you cannot act like she never existed because that would mean denying my babies girls. Like Prashant, he gave me Ansh; that I cannot regret despite everything he put me through. It does hurt, worse because you were still in love, whereas I was just negligible quantity.
"Don't, don't say that again. You are not that, you are a woman devoted to her family, respectful of her elders and so loving to her children especially the one she didn't bear. I forbid you to diminish my wonderful Aarti", Yash finished seriously
"Okay baba, sorry I was just making a point".
"Well then do better, you were precious then and even more today, it's Prashant lost for being blind, the fool", Yash said
"Would you like to listen to my point or continue to lecture me"
"Depends, did my point, registered in your head?"
"It did", she smiles
He intensely stares at her, looking for doubt or self-deprecation like she was used to doing. No matter; it may take a lifetime but she'll get there under his care and worship. "Go on"
"I propose this, let's not swear impossible promises, let's just tried to always be truthful with each other, be there for one another in good and bad time and raise our children in our traditions and values".
"That's a good proposal", Yash agrees; how could he think that she would not understand. He has been selfish and self-centered; she also lost a love and knew the throes of that pain.
Aarti stood up and went to retrieve a package by the size of it, one could guess the form, but not the content, "here, that's for you. Happy anniversary", Aarti said
"A gift for me?" Yash stood up delighted
"It's nothing big, but for the man who has everything, I thought you'll like it, hopefully" she said nervously
"No doubts, I'll love it", he said going to kiss her
"You haven't even opened it", she laughs less tense
"I am not worried. It's you, you know me very well". He tears the wrapping paper, then opened the box and reach for the painting. It was a painting of the children having fun with their father under the watchful eyes of both their Mama.
Yash eyes tears, "how did you manage to have them keep it a secret", he said moved after a moment
Aarti smiles, "that's my secret jaan. I may need it in the future for other gifts or else"
"You blackmail them with their favorite candies, rights", he guessed
"I am not telling. So, do you like it?", she asks again
"I love it. It's the most wonderful gift that you could have given me"
"She was a good woman whose life got cut short and she has her place here"
Yash carefully put the painting on his desk. He was still amazed and went back to hug his wife. "Thank you. And happy anniversary too". He finally got hold of his emotion "So what are your plan tomorrow?", he asks
"The usual routine, children, work, house chores"
"Cancel them"
"Yash, you know I can't"
Yash started to kiss her again, wanting her again, "yes, you can. Did you think that the flowers were my only, forgive me gesture?"
"Hum yes"
"Oh ye of little faith. As you said earlier, it's our fifth anniversary and it will be part two of the celebration"
"So that's why you let me run the show"
"Are you kidding, you appear all sexy and tantalizing, render me speechless, what's a guy to do, but ravish his wife"
Aarti laughs, "You could have said something"
"Hum, I was told yesterday, no actually strongly advise to make it simple and be considerate of your feelings"
"Pankaj and Prateek are smart men", she agrees
"Hey, you are supposed to praise me, your husband"
"Right, sorry, jaan ", she grabs him, "wasn't that praise enough earlier?" she mocks
"Huh... phew...of course, but I am only a guy, we need to hear it many times for it to register"
"You are such a con man"
"So meet me at noon tomorrow", he said panting under her care
"For what?"
"You'll see", he mumbles
"Yash, you better not leave me stranded somewhere", she warns
"Hum, he moans, you have my jewel in your hand, I'll promise everything", he relents
"Oh, okay, do your worst", Aarti gave up
"I will", and kisses her to get back to their world of sensation and pleasure.
*
At dinner table
"Are Yash and Aarti out?" Bauji asks
"No", Gayatri answers
"Aren't they joining us, for dinner", Bauji demands again
"Dadaji, Mama said not to disturb her and papa because they have to talk, but it's been a long time, so maybe they still talking and papa is still in trouble", Ansh replies innocently.
The people around the table snorts, Vidhi smiles in her napkin, Pankaj smirks, while Prateek wink at Paridhi, Gayatri Ma did not dare meet her children eyes for fear of laughing out loud.
"It's because of Arpita-Ma anniversary, papa made Mama a little sad and now he is kissing Mama to say sorry, but it's taking so long now. Do you think Mama won't forgive Papa? She has too or Papa will be grunting again", Palak said
"Kids, Papa and Mama are fine. Now finish eating your food, it will be bed time soon and tonight Pari and I will put you to bed"
"Ok Chachu", Ansh said
"Are you preparing for when your baby comes Chachi", Palak asks
"Yes, princess"
"I want Paridhi Chachi to tuck me in", Payal demands
"I am hurt, rejected by a woman", Prateek falsely complains
"Stop your comedy Prat. I would love to, baby", to which Payal beams
"Well, I suppose, I won't have to be forcefully sent to the office tomorrow since someone will be in a good mood, assuming he gets out of his room", Bauji said with a mild tone.
At his word, they could no longer resist it and broke into laughter. Had they been there, Aarti would be dismayed at the teasing and furiously blushing, whereas Yash would be please with a dope smile and take it in stride.
Yes, life at the Scindhia Mansion was noisy, loud, meddlesome, unpredictable at time, but never dull or lacking care and love, precious memories being collected for the future generation.
The End
PS: will correct grammar and spellings mistakes in time.
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