CHAPTER 1: The Theory of Soulmates
Twinkle often wondered why they ever had to learn about colors. They couldn't see them anyway. Well not until they met their soul mates anyway. But yet the Indian Educational Board insisted that all 6th graders had to learn about colors and their meaning.
Red, it signified love and anger.
"Ma'am lekin how can red be for both love and anger. Woh dono opposite emotions hai na?" An 11 year old Twinkle asked her teacher.
The question wasn't much appreciated. And Twinkle was rudely asked to study the material provided and not to be philosophical.
Twinkle resigned asking their teacher anything. She would just have to resort to asking Kunj, her best friend. She only hopes his teacher was better than hers, at least then he could teach her later.
Later when they return from school and Kunj habitually comes over to her house to do their homework, Twinkle asks him the question that had been haunting her the whole day. "Kunj, tu ne aaj colors ke baare mein padha?"
"Haan."
"Toh Kunj, red dono pyaar aur gusse ke liye kaise ho sakta hai?"
Kunj puts his math homework to a halt. Twinkle wasn't going to let him finish in peace if he didn't answer her. Plus he loves her questions anyway, they were always so interesting and beyond what was ever thought in their textbooks. He bites the rubber end of his pencil, in thought for a few minutes. "Dekh love aur anger dono bahut strong emotions hai, issliye shayad dono ke liye red hai."
"Par phir bhi Kunj." she sighed. "Dono opposite emotions hai na?"
"Lekin dono passion ko represent karte hai na? Sooch Anger bhi ek passionate emotion hai, aur love bhi!"
Twinkle nodded her head slowly, the point being understood. "Toh teacher ne aisa kyu nahi kaha? Aiviye mujhe daant diya!"
Kunj laughs at her for a good while, she always gets in to trouble for her questions. But she was just being curious, it was a good thing. He failed to understand why the teachers didn't like that. "Acha bas, abhi tu bhi apna homework complete kar."
They were two word problems away from completing their maths homework when another question struck the curious cat. "Kunj humme colors kabhi dekhegey?"
"Jab humme apne soul mates milegey, pagli. Aur tu toh yeh jaanti hai!"
"Haan par kab? Humme apne soul mates kab milegey?"
"Twinkle! Jab time aayega, tabhi hum apne soul mates se milegey. Pakka! Ab please ab tu apna homework complete kar."
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Another day, another homework session and another bout of questions. "Kunj? Kya hum sab ke soul mates hote hai?"
"Haan, maa toh aisa hi kehti hai."
"Par agar duniya mein odd number of log ho toh? Phir toh ek banda humesha akela hi hoga na!"
Kunj hums in thought, he never thought of it that way. Twinkle had a point. Of course the world wouldn't always have even number of people. Death and birth were in perpetual occurrence. He tells her, that he doesn't know the answer to that.
"Chalo Maa se poochte hai?" He tells, jumping up, and pushing her English book away.
"Par Homework?"
Twinkle doesn't listen, she grabs his hand and pulls him away from the table. He relents, it isn't the first time he was pulled away from his school work anyway. Plus this was a chance to learn something new, so why not?
They find Leela in the kitchen, chopping up some veggies. "Maa, we have a question."
"Haan, poocho."
"Maa, kya duniya mein har kisi ke pass ek soul mate hota hai? Par dekho agar duniya mein odd number of log ho toh?" Twinkle started to rapidly fire question after question.
The smile that Leela had, falters a bit. There were harsh truths about soul mates and she wasn't sure she wanted to share them with Twinkle and Kunj just yet. They wouldn't understand.
She easily distracts them, tempting them with her delicacies, and it works. The question was avoided for the time being.
But the question could only be avoided for so long before, Twinkle made her way to Leela's room in the dead of the night. "Ma?" she places a gentle hand against her mother's shoulder. "Ma?"
It stirs Leela awake. "Kya hua putar, sab theek toh hai na?" concerns drips through her voice.
Twinkle buries herself under the duvet next to her mother, and hugs her close. Twinkle wasn't stupid, she was a grown up now, she was eleven years old and she understood that Leela avoided the question earlier. "Maa? Kya sab ka soul mate hota hai?"
"Putar tu yeh kyu pooch rehi hai?" Leela sighs.
"Bas yuhi. Batao na, kya sab ka soul mate hota hai?"
Twinkle was relentless. And she was stubborn and she was curious. And Leela really wouldn't blame her. Questions like these were bound to come up one time or another. Leela hoped it would be another time. "Nahi puttar, har kisi ka soul mate nahi hota."
"Kyu ma?"
"Pata nahi, puttar. Yeh sirf rab jaanta hai."
"Toh jin logo ka soul mate nahi hota, unhe kabhi colours nahi dekhai denge?" Twinkle asks horrified. How could the lord be so cruel to deny someone two beautiful things, the love of a soulmate and the beauty of colors? Frankly she couldn't wait to find her soulmate so that she could see the colors that people always praise about.
"Nahi puttar, unhe kabhi rang nahi dekhayi dete."
Twinkle tightens her grip on Leela and a few tears escape her eyes. It wasn't because she feared about her own fate, whether she was destined for a mate or not, but she was desponded about the ones who never could see the colors.
They fall silent for a while but not asleep. "Maa, rango wali duniya kitni khoobsurat hai?"
"Bahut khoobsurat hai, puttar. Bahut se bhi bahut."
"Kya aapko abhi bhi rang nazar aate hai?"
"Nahi puttar. Ab nahi." Leela passes Twinkle a sad smile. "Tere papa ke jaane ke baad, saare rang halke hone lage, dhundle hone lage aur phir thode saalo ke baad bilkul udd gaye."
"Aisa kyu maa?"
"Bas, jab kissi ka soul mate yeh duniya se chale jaate hai, toh woh saath mein, apne mate ko diye huye rang bhi saath mein le jaate hai." It still pained Leela, the lack of colors in her life, the lack of love. She wished that Twinkle's father was yet with them.
But that was life, not everyone got everything but some losses were greater than others. Sadly, life must go on. But she had Twinkle now and that was enough.
"I am sorry, Maa." She kisses Leela on her cheek, and the mother reciprocates by placing one on the daughter's forehead.
It was one of those nights were they slept in each other's embrace.
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It was in 10th grade, when the Education System required for them to study The Theory of Soul Mates'.
It excited Twinkle immensely, a whole subject on Soulmates! It would be fun and she could ace the subject too. Kunj failed to understand her enthusiasm. He pulled her cheeks and called her Jhalli'.
It wasn't fun.
It was heartbreaking. And Kunj often found Twinkle crying over the textbook of The Theory of Soulmates'.
"Twinkle! Tu ro kyu rahi hai?" Kunj asks. They were just supposed to be doing Homework, he doesn't understand why she is getting emotional?
She gives him a list. A) Not everyone had a soulmate. B) People only get to see colors after the first touch of their soulmates after the age of eighteen. C) The colors slowly vanished after the death of a soulmate or after the death of love amidst the lovers.
He calls her stupid for crying over what is the way of the world. This was something no one could change and there was no use crying over something set in stone, dyed in the very fabric of the universe.
She doesn't stop crying, so he gets her chocolates just like he did every time she would cry. "Jhalli kahi ki. Chal ab homework kar." He smiles and mumbles something about him spending all his pocket money on her itself.
That night Twinkle wishes that Kunj be her soulmate.
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His eighteenth birthday was quite uneventful according to Twinkle. She touched him multiple times during the day but he was yet wasn't Iridescent.
"Iridescent?" Kunj chuckles. They were sitting in his room, unwrapping all the present he had received for the day.
"Haan, agar you meet your soulmate you are Iridescent. Otherwise nahi."
Iridescent. Kunj liked the way she put it.
"Well at least humme humare kapde color coordinate nahi karne padte. Usha aunty humsha se kapdo ke colors coordination ko le kar complain karti rehti hai."
Kunj agrees. She had a point. Life was easy so far.
Later that night she meekly asked her mother why Kunj hadn't been colored yet. Leela with her tongue in her cheek answered, "Shayad uski soulmate ab tak atthaara saal ki nahi hui ho."
"Dono soulmates ko atthaara saal ka hona zaroori hai?"
The answer was yes.
Twinkle was more eager for her birthday that year than any other birthday.
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"Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday to you!" It's just like every year. Leela and Kunj waking her up in the morning with a song and a single Vanilla cupcake to share. She hugs her mother first, barely. She jumps into Kunj's arm with more enthusiasm than he was ready for. He stumbles back a bit, regains his balances first before wrapping his arms around her. He automatically places his lips by her forehead, planting a chaste kiss there. "Happy Birthday Siyappa Queen."
She punches him in the shoulders but not as hard as she usually does. Instead she was staring at their hands intently. She purses her lips in slight disappointment. She was uncolored.
She looks at Leela for guidance. The latter assures her to be patient.
"Maa aur kitna sabr? Mujhe pakka pakka pata hai, Kunj hi mera soulmate hai."
Leela swallows the lump in her throat. "Puttar abhi toh tera birthday baaki hai. Aur aisi baato ko time lagta hai."
"Maaa..." she begins to whine again only to have her mouth stuffed with a paratha.
Of course Twinkle shared everything with Leela and this little crush of hers on Kunj was barely a secret among them. It was the opposite of a secret in fact, where Twinkle had let Leela know on multiple occasions that she wished Kunj was her mate. It was meant to be according to her. Leela wished so too.
Amidst birthday celebrations and a strong faith, Twinkle lets the thought of being iridescent escape her. It will happen when it happens, a new temporary motto.
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"Toh...nervous?" She asks him. They were lounging in his room, watching Men in Black for the fourth time.
"Thoda. Tu?"
"BAHUT!" She exclaims loudly, putting the movie on pause. "How can you not be nervous?! Thode hi din mein humme pata chalega ki hum dono NYU mein accepted huye hai bhi ke nahi. Aur main toh bahut se bahut nervous hoon." She pops a few popped corn in her mouth before continuing again. "Agar tumhe NYU mein admission nahi mila aur mujhe mila toh?! Aur agar mujhe nahi mila aur tumhe mila toh?!"
"Aisa nahi hoga pagal. Be positive."
"Mujhe tumhare bina NYU nahi jaana!" she states her biggest fear, him leaving her behind. And then eventually life would happened and he would forget her. And that is why she is hell bent on making sure that she stays with him as much as possible. She wasn't insecure, no, that wasn't it. She was merely-Okay perhaps she was insecure. How could she not be when he was so perfect in all aspects of life while she was just another Jhalli', a Siyappa Queen he so often called her.
And she thinks about this topic a lot, dreams up scenarios where she would have to be left behind, where she would be of little importance in his life. And it scares her. But she tries to coat it all under a mask of childishness, in desperate hopes that if she didn't change herself at all and that if she remained childish like this than he wouldn't change either. And if he didn't change than he wouldn't realize that she wasn't good enough for him.
So far being childish worked pretty well.
And yet she found herself wishing on a wishing star that she was more than just a friend to him.
A soul mate, perhaps.
TO BE CONTINUED...
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