Raman after his encounter with Bala

Ever since Ishita came back, all Raman sees is that she left. from Bala and his conversation, what i saw is that he is so consumed with the fact that Ishita stayed away, he has forgotten what he said to her. he spends seven years ridden with guilt and the minute he sees her again, he forgets what he did, and is in so much anger and jealousy it takes Bala to remind him of his own words. And now he is clinging onto that anger, even after the glimpse of the real Raman we see for a second. otherwise he truly has to face what he did himself. now i think he is being a bit cowardly. he's sticking to 'ishita left me' so he doesn't have to think about the why right now. anger is easier right now than the world of pain he is delaying to let himself feel for what he himself did. its human, vulnerable raman putting his defences up.

This is Raman in denial. Now that Ishita is alive, he can't continue to just fester in guilt, he has to face the fact he drove the woman he loves to leave him. The idea that Shagun left him because of greed, and the fact that he wasn't good enough for her starkly contrasts the idea that Ishita left because she wasn't good enough for him. Bala reminds Raman this and we see the iron wall he casts around everyone fall for a second. But then, how can he even think to redeem himself. And how does he face the fact that he too became one of the many people to question Ishita for something she has now power over, the fact she cannot carry a child.

So the defences that dropped come right back. Because Raman will die a thousand deaths over and over every day knowing that Ishita left everything for him. If he does this, then he is the one that separated Adi and pihu from their mother, and not Ishita. That would be too much for Raman to handle, so as always, Raman finds the solution in anger and isolation.

If he is to blame for all this, how can he face Ishita. The woman he loves madly, truly, deeply. So yet again the coping mechanism is anger. Because if it's not anger, and it's pain, and he falls to the floor, what if she doesn't still come back to him?

What if he was wrong, and now Mani truly is the better man. No, the woman Raman loves obsessively becoming Mani's because Raman failed. Another truth he would have to face. So anger will allow Raman to mask all these fears and all this guilt, and keep the heart wrenching pain and anguish that comes with Raman being the culprit at bay.

Raman is an incredibly vulnerable, sensitive soul. And these qualities, society dictates, especially Asian culture, are not the workings of the Indian alpha male. But we cannot deny our Raman is like this. He is. But he is now using the guise of an Indian alpha male to keep all the hurt and anguish of being the one that destroyed his life himself at bay.

That is why we are only seeing glimpses of Ishita's Raman. This 'beast' on our screens is Raman trying excruciatingly hard not to face the bitter truth.that If Ishita was wrong by staying away, then a certain someone pushed her that way too.

Great minds think alike? 😆

He said all that almost today..when he said tumhaari ishima saat saal pehle marr chuki hai adi..main nahi jaanta yeh aurat kaun hai.😊...his denial in capital letters...😆

More later

Ok, here is my take.

I kind of disagree that raman has forgotten his own doings because it is overshadowed by his anger. The very first glimpse we saw of the real raman bhalla post the leap was in the drunken scene with adi , where he hurts his hand. There he very clearly was guilty..guilty if his own deeds..because he never said that they left me..he clearly says 'I lost the 2 people I loved tjhe most..I am what you call, a loser'.

So deep within he certainly knows and has been guilty of his doings for all these years. Cut again to the jail scene..where he screams at ishita saying, there i was dying every minute in guilt of your death and here you v were alive and didn't bother to inform even.

So again, he knows his fault but then couple of factors have made him stoic and like you rightly sa I d the 'alpha male' who maskd his pain behind his anger...

The most important of those is his insecurity with mani being around. Yes , mani was WV always a threat to him and when he now feels ..whatever the status of b ishita's and Mani's relationship, it's a fact she chose to be with him all these years..in hiding..alive..all things the ishita he knew would never have donr...makes him doubly insecure and defensive and his wal k s have hone further up..it's Mani's presence which makes him uncomfortable to tjhe point of wanting to bury all the grey aspects of their relationship and put up a ' I don't give a damn about you ' facade..it's more like ..' she didn't bother about what I went through. She didn't even bother about how the kids were doing..this isn't my ishita. This is a new ishita...someone I don't recognize. .someone who is not selfless and giving but someone who speaks Mani's language...and thrrein lies tjhe catch..that's the crux of why the walls have gone higher up.. and the offence has gone to extreme leveks of giving hurt...inckuding trying to give her the same hurt , she is giving him...hence shagun and marriage to shagun😉

You are spot on when you say raman bhalla is more sensitive and vulnerable n most male characters on telly. .I would go a step ahead and say he is more sensitive and vulnerable than ishita in this equation . And that's why his defenses are extreme, self destruction and even far more juvenile😛.

The scene with bAla was poignant. When bala spoke of tjhe difference between the 'betrayal' by both women, he paused. It was the real raman bhalla agaim...he pondered, and for fleeting seconds tjhe facade fell. He was more than clear about his hurt in that scene where he saud who is this woman you are talking about. . She didn't even care to ask if I was dead or alive, or how her kids were doing , ...so he is still saying that aloud..no this woman isn't the ishita i know. She can't be..my ishita would never do this. ..

Yes ..it is a fact that ishita thinks tjhe sane too..this isn't my raman... the guy I knew would nev r hurt me this way or the way he did 7 yrs back...

But both need to see the mirror. .bit for that .. at least for raman. . Tjhe mani factor has to be v resolved for good...that is the biggest hurdue towards any progress he will make towards accepting that indeed it's his ishita who is back for good. ..

Till then denial and anger it is...and hence more self destruction😛🥱

Sorry for rambling. .hope i made sense😆

I just voice what I feel, thank you 😊

I shall wait...

Loved ur analysis 😳

Specially this part. The woman he is crazy about and loves so so so much, how will he face her once he accepts it.

But I know when he breaks down that too will be only in front of her.

I really hope the cvs give us one scene of both of them letting that guard drop once the truth and whatever is all out and just having that breakdown. It's needed so badly 😭

Divan will make us cry and how 😳 they are so so good with scenes that high on emotions.

Plz cvs 😭

I'm definitely not saying it's healthy. I'm saying this is how Raman is coping. Raman is a sum of extremes because of his sensitivity. I actually do think Raman and Ishita are toxic, but I also think they are a part of each other. They literally feel pain when they hurt the other. It's an all consuming, messy, relationship. It is far from healthy. But it also means these two people can and will only love each other.