Chapter 5
Next morning, Anna wakes up early & gets ready for her new mission. As the previous night due to Ghotalas. But today she wil start following Manav & get to know his secret... Thinking this she gets ready & comes out & is welcomed by Liza & Ronnie who were seated on sofa just as she had left them last night.. She was surprised first but after listening to Ronnie she was shocked, as Ronnie was convincing Liza to go at her room & rest for some time as whole night she had sat on the sofa waiting for Anna's answer..
"Nai Ronnie, me idharich baithenga!! Jab tak mere ko mere sawaal ka jawab nai mil jata tab tak idharich baithenga.. Phir chahe mere idharich lifetime baithna pade me baithenga..." Listening Liza saying this Anna was shocked & upset that she had hurt her Bhabhi.
She immediately goes towards Liza & says, "Oh my god !! I don't believe this!! Liza Bhabhi, aap raat bhar yahan baithi rahi kyun ki maine aapko yeh sach nai bataya ki me kal raat bahar kyu gai thi? Thik hai suniye, me kal raat Manav ko dekhke bahar nikali thi.. Jab me sone se pehle khidki band karne gai tab maine Manav ko bahar dekha woh kuch pareshan tha aur kisika intezaar kar raha tha, aur pichle kuch Dino se woh waise bhi ajeeb bartao kar raha hai, toh maine socha me pata karu ki kya baat hai.. Aur waise bhi mujhe lagta hai koi bahut badi baat woh hum sabse chhupa raha hai.. Kal aap NE dekha woh Jo ayi thi, alien, woh Manav se his tarah se baat kar rahi thi isse lagta tha woh dono ek dusre ko bahut achhe se jante hai, pehle bhi mil chuke hai. Kaise?? Yahi sawal ka jawab lene gai thi. Sach me Bhabhi aur kal aapko nai bataya kyunki me aapko pareshan nai karna chahti thi."
"Anna!!", replies Liza, " Tumko kya lagta haye, ki tum humko bolenga nai to humko pata nai chalega ki tum pareshan haye. Mana ki me tumhara maa nai haye, par mere liye tum mera baby haye. Tumko dekhke hi samaj sakta haye ki tum pareshan haye, dukhi haye."
"Liza Bhabhi me janti huu aap mujhse bahut pyaar karti hain. Mujhe aapke pyaar pe koi shak nai hai. Par mera vishwas kijiye me aapko yeah sab sach janne ke baad batana chahti thi.", Anna clarifies.
Then noticing Anna all ready to go out Liza inquires on which Anna tells she is going to Manav's house in name of having morning tea there & she goes. & even Liza & Ronnie go to their room to get ready for the day.
Anna goes to ojhas & she is greeted by ojha uncle taunting Lajjo Aunty on the chai she made & Lajjo Aunty giving back to him.. & in between chandrabhan starts his poem. Hearing the poem Anna realises if she wil stand & watch this her mission wil never succeed. So she makes her presence knows to all. Lajjo Aunty offers her tea & she obliges. Before she can enquire about Manav, he himself enters the house from his workout.
On seeing Manav, Lajjo is shocked. She immediately questions him, " Manav!! Tu baharse kahan se aa raha hai beta, aur tu kaise bahar hai?? Aur thara kamra band kyun hain??"
Manav smiling replies, "Maa!! Pehle to shant ho jao aur ek ek karke puchho.. Thik hai, pehle toh me subah 5:30 baje hi uth gaya tha, me raat ko yahin sofe pe soya tha. Phir me apna workout karne gaya kyunki jabse Papa ne hemant ko kaha tha mujhse kasrat karna sikhe woh roj aata hai mere pass sikhne toh isliye me pehle kar leta huu phir usse sikhata huun. "
Lajjo relaxes. But ojha uncle suddenly remembers sumthing, "Ke ke ke ke ke ke ke ke ke, bol raha hai vibhishan, tu bahar kyun soya tha? Thare kamre me koi taklif hai ke, pankha kharab ho gaya hai ke. Par ghar me toh AC hai Jo raat ko chalu bhi tha? Phir kyun raat ko bahar soya? Bol jhallar!"
Before Manav says sumthing, Ramdulari peeps in, "Jijaji woh Aki hota hai, aki"
Lajjo stops ramdulari, "Ramdulari, tharese kaha tha na Hindi me bol, kyun English boli?"
Ramdulari keeps quiet. All towards Manav for answer, & Manav tells, "Ek min, humare ghar ek mehmaan aaye hain, unhe maineere kamre me rehne diya hai. Pehle me unko utha ke yahan le aaon phir aapke sawaalo ke jawab dunga." Saying this he goes inside. Anna is shocked by this.
& here continues ojha uncle & anuty's taunting cricket & in between chandrabhans poema to entertain. Anna still thinking. In mean time Manav comes out & behind him cums a beautiful girl."Maa, Papa, yeah dekhiye, humari mehmaan, inki mehmaan nawazi me koi kasar nai rehni chahiye. "
The girl goes towards ojha uncle, bows down to take blessings. Then goes to Lajjo , chandrabhan & ramdulari.. All r super shocked as why the girl is taking their blessings.
Ojha uncle is the first one to come out of shock. He starts his ke train, "Ke ke ke ke ke ke ke ke ke ke , ke kar rahi hai jhallar. Mhare jaise nojawan Rajasthan ke pair chhukke usse budha kyun bana rahi hai. "
Before ojha uncle continues his praise, Manav immediately buts in, "Papa, kal raat aapko bataya tha na, Rutu di humare yahan rahengi, meri cousin hain, aur aap rishtey me inke cha-cha lagte hain to aapke pair chhukke aashirwad le rahi hai, maine inko bataya hai, bum insaano me khass karke hum bharatiyon me aisa riwaj hota hai, him apno se bado ke pair chhukke unka aashirwad lete hain. Isliye yeah aap sabke pair chhu rahi hai."
Lajjo justs smiles at the girl blesses her, "Khush raho beta!!" Rutu excitedly hugs her saying, "Thank you, kaki!! Aur aisa aashirwad bhi dijiye ki woh mujhe dekhke muskuraye na ki kal raat ki tarah daate."
Ramdulari butts in, "UK, UK, Uff Kursi, Gud bliss u"
Rutu gets afraid listening this language & immediately goes behind Manav as if trying to protect herself. Manav gets surprised by this as far as he knew His Rutu di was very strong person she doesn't get afraid of anyone apart from that one person, who he doubted to be Vasant Bhaiya. He asks Rutu, "Didi, kya hua? Aap aise kyun mere pichhe aa gai?"
"Manav!! Yeah kaunsi code language hai?? Maine tum insaano ki saari languages download kar li hai, khass karke saari Hindustani bhashayen, jaise, Hindi, Marathi, Sanskrit, gujurati, Punjabi, Bengali, kannad, Telugu, orissi, Hyderabadi, Bihari, assami, konkani, Tamil, marwadi, aur bhi kuch thi jaise Kutchhi, English, prakrut, French, German, Chinese, Japanese..." & the list goes on... Came the reply from Rutu, "Par yeh bhasha maine kabhi nai suni, tune bataya tha Na ki Tim insaano me kaam pe koi code language bhi hoti hai, toh yeh koi code language thi kya?? Yeh mujhe kahin pakad toh nai legi!!! 9 2 11 bachao mujhe!!"
Manav immediately stops her, "Rutu di, dijiye, pehle toh shan't ho jayiye. Yeah koi code language nai hai. Yeh toh mausiji ki khud ki English hai, unhone banai hai, sabka waqt barbad karne ke liye. Aap khamakha ghabra rahi hai." Rutu heaves a sigh of relief & says, "Oh!! Aisa hai, tu sach ke raha hai Na?? Lekin koi aise kaise itni woh woh... Woh kya tha... Haan wahiyaad... Itni wahiyaad bhasha kaise bol sakta hai koi!!"
Hearing this ramdulari gets embarrassed as Lajjo tells her, "Ramdulari, maine kaha tha na thare ko engreji me baat mat karna tu Hindi school me gai thi Na, thareko Hindi aati hai Na, nai aati to thari bhojpuri toh aati hi hai Na thare ko woh bol, tu meherbani engreji mat bol."
Rutu consoles her, "Kaki rehne dijiye, koi baat nai, yeah bhasha mera 9 2 11 to samaj hi gaya hoga na, 17 21 aur 87^2 ko bhi aati hogi na. Me unse sikh lungi. "
Lajjo smiles & tells, "Beta woh tu baad me sikh Lena, pehle chal nashta karne, me abhi thare aur Manav ke liye garan chai aur nashta leke aayi, tab tak tum log tyar home aao. Anna jara chal beta mhare saath. " Anna who had her jaw dropped down til knw quietly went inside with Lajjo. After they get ready & have their breakfast Rutu tells Manav to show her 9211's house as she wanted to meet him. Though Manav isn't sure he shows her the house & walks behind her to Ghotala house.
When Manav & Rutu were having breakfast Ojha uncle runs to Bhatt house. There as usual Bhavana & Bhairavi marry go round was on. He dint listen to Bhavana & ran to wake up Bhadresh who was sleeping on jhulla. He tried hard to wake Bhadresh but couldn't, then thinking sumthing he whispered sumthing in his ears & in a moment Bhadresh was up. & they both run towards Ronnie. Bhavana is just shocked as may what be ojha uncle never fails to listen her complaint on Bhairavi. Though how much ever they taunt & tease each other, but he always considered her as his sister. She realises sumthing is fishy & goes out taking Bhairavi with her.
There she sees, Ronnie was doing his work of cutting woods for furniture. Murlibhai was telling sumthing to him & Bhadresh. & she saw Manav Cuming out of his house with a very beautiful girl & Anna following them in a tow. They were moving towards Ghotala house. & the 3 idiots, Amar Akbar Anthony of their colony also stopped their talks & went to Ghotalas. All going to Ghotalas made Bhavana remember what new antic work Bhairavi did this morning. & even she taking Bhairavi went towards Ghotalas.
At Ghotala house, Vasant was trying to talk with Varsha & Sharad & both were ignoring him, "Varsha!!!! Meri baat toh suno!! Sharad samjha na apni Bhabhi ko!!! Sharad!!! Sharad!!! Achha tum bhi mujhse baat nai kar rahe. Varsha!! Sharad!!! Tum dono mujhse baat nahi karne wale??" Asks Vasant.
Varsha & Sharad reply in unison, "Na hi!! Na hi!! Na hi!!!"
Vasant sighs, "Pakka nahi!! Thik hai ruko, (shouts) Hemant!!! Hemant!!"
Seeing this drama, Rutu is perplexed & happy. Immediately peeps in, "Achha hai tum dono isse baat mat karo, toh mera 9 2 11 mujhse baat karega." & stands there laughing.
Varsha & Sharad run towards her. Varsha & Rutu hug each other tightly. "Meri 17 21 kaisi ho?? Haye human form me kitni mmm dikhti ho.." & sees around to make sure whether new imported English machine isn't there to irritate or scare her.
Varsha excitedly asks, "ETA kaisi ho tum?? Tum yahan kaise? Kal toh tum chalu gai thi na, jab kisine tumhe jhor se daata tha? Phir tum yahan?? Aur kal tum yahan ayi kyu thi? Tumhe pata hai Vasant ne mujhse kaha tumhara yahan rehna tumhare liye khatarnak ho sakta hai. Tumhari sehat bhi kharab ho sakti hai. Isliye Vasant ne tumhe kal wapas chale jane ko kaha tha. Hala ki... "
"Sshhh!!! 17 21 kitna bolti ho tum. Thoda saas bhi le liya karo. Insaan saas lete hai tabhi zinda rehte hain.", saying this ETA/Rutu makes Varsha calm down, " Ab toh me aa gai hu na, aaram se tumhare saare sawaal ke jawab dungi. Pehle mujhe sabse milne toh do."
Saying this she moves a bit aside & Sharad hugs her emotionally. Sharad isn't ready to leave her & was crying in mind, Rutu could feel it. She patted his back lovingly. She broke the hug & calmed him. "Beta!! Chup yeh kya itne bade hoke bache ko tarah ban rahe ho. Chalo chup."
"Etamaa, aap kaisi hain? Aap kal kyun chalo hai is tarah se? Bhale hi Bhaiya ne aapko kaha jane ko lekin me hoon na. Aap mere liye ruk jaate." Complained Sharad.
"Achha Babu, sorry!! Dekh abhi kan pakdu??" replied Rutu. Sharad immediately stops her hands from reaching ears. "Aur yeh kya mujhe ETAma bula rahe ho.. Me kya itni badi lagti huu. Didi bolona mujhe." & Rutu winks saying this.
Sharad smiles but thinks to trouble her. "Arey me aapko didi bulao?? Soch lijiye!!! Agar aap meri didi Hui toh Bhaiya ki.. Be..."
Realizing what Sharad is going to say she stops him, "Nai nai nai nai nai nai nai, didi nai tum didi mat bolna. Tujhe Jo bulana hai bula. Koi baat nai."
Before any of them can speak, Vasant spoke, "Sharad!! Tum isse ETA nai bula sakte. Iske liye musibat khadi ho sakti hai. Iska insaani naam hai Na us naam se bulao. Aur tum, hum yahan insaani roop me hai, humare insaani naam hai. Us naam se bulaogi. Ye 9211,1721 nai bula sakti tum hume yahan pruthvi par. Humare insaani naam hain Vasant, Varsha, Sharad, Hemant, shishir. Us naam se bulao. Hoon?"
Immediately Rutu replies," Hooon"
"Hheeenn" comes the voice from behind. Rutu recognizes the voice & gets frightened. She immediately runs behind Sharad. Hemant walks happily towards his mom.
"Mummy!! Yeh Aunty kaun hain? Yeh Papa ki woh dusre grah ki dost ETA aunty hai kya?" Rutu gets more frightened as Hemant recognized her.
Varsha replies, "Haan beta, yeh ETA aunty hi hai. Tumhare chacha se milne ayi hai yahan."
"Achha?" Questioning, but immediately does, " EEE" and continues, "Namaste Aunty!! Kaisi hain aap??"
"Thik huu beta" stammering replies Rutu.
Varsha asks Hemant, "Hemant beta, tu kahan gaya tha subah subah?"
Hemant replies, "woh mummy, aap Papa se naraz thi Na kisi baat pe. Toh Papa ne mujhse kaha ki me aapke liye yeh cactus ka Phool le aaun. Aapko bahut pasand hain Na. Isliye. Toh me bahar gaya lene. Par mila hi nai mujhe. Toh maine apne nakhun se dekhiye ye banaya hai aapke liye." & he shows a bottle to her.
All wonder, Ronnie speaks, "yeh Varsha ko cactus pasand haye?? Aur yeh Hemant cactus bottle me leke aaya haye?"
Bhairavi replies, "Cactus me se rus nikal na jaye isliye rakha hoga."
Bhavana, "Chakudi, cactus me se rus kaise nikal ta hai?"
"Kyun Baa, hum woh aloevera mese rus nikal te to hain. Aur aap hi toh boli thi us din, Chakudi yeh aloe thoda maine istemal Kia hai. Beta tu bhi laga le abhi warna iska rus nikal jayega."
Before bhavana can say any thing they hear Varsha's voice. "Hemant yeh bottle me kya hai. Yeh toh khushbudar pani lag raha hai?"
"Haan mummy, Khushbu toh aayegi hi na. Yeh woh cake me dalne ka rus hai. Isse essence kehte hain. Yeh khushbu wala hi hota hai." Spoke Hemant.
All got confused listening this except Vasant. But he decided to let Varsha handle Hemant. Coz if she wouldn't understand what Hemant is speaking she wil ask him. & finally she wil talk to him & smiles inwardly.
"Kyaa? " asked Varsha. Sharad started thinking what it might be logically. Finally as no option left looked towards Vasant for help.
Vasant said, "Aae gende, tu cake ka essence kyu laya? Maine tujhe se kya kaha tha? Cactus Phool laa aur Varsha ko de. Yeah Phool hai?"
"Oh! Mere bhole Papa!! Yeah bottle toh dekhiye full hi hai. Puri bhari hai. Pehle woh dukan wale uncle ki bottle puri bhari nai thi. Phir maine unse kaha mujhe jo puri bhari hai woh de. Kyunki papa ne mujhe full lana kaha hai. Toh use uncle ne dekhiye yeh kya diya mujhe. Yeh kate wala. Unhone kaha tumhare papa ne ye mangwaya hoga. Par maine bhi keh diya. Mere papa mummy ko aisa kata thode hi denge. Phir unhone thodi der baad de diya yeh bottle puri bharke. Aur Papa yeh cacrus hi toh hai. Mujhe pata hai aapne bolne me gadbad ki thi. Cake ka tus kuch nai hota. Cake me rus dalta hai. Isliye me le aaya cakerus.", replies Hemant.
" Arey gende, tu koi kaam thik ne kyu nai karta? Hamesha gadbad karta hai.", saying this Varsha starts beating Hemant. But Hemant runs behind Vasant.
Vasant stops Varsha from scolding Hemant. "Varsha!! Ruko!! Dekho bhale hi yeh galat samjha. Par Jo laya hai woh hume kaam bhi toh aa sakta hai. Waise yeh tumhara sabse pasand ka Phool bhi laya hai Na. Aur ye essence tum woh masala cake yani handve me daaldo joh tum abhi bana rahi ho, sambhar ke saath khane ke liye."
All colonywale were shocked on knowing the dish Varsha is preparing.
Mean time, Liza & Lajjo come to Ghotalas knowing all are there & take Bhavana along with them to market. After Bhavana leaves even Bhairavi goes at her house. Rutu remembers sumthing & says, "Hey Manav, chal hum chalte hain. "
Manav surprised, "Kahan Rutu di?"
"Arey market, mujhe woh thodi shopping karni hai." Replied Rutu.
Anna was sure that Manav would refuse as he hated going shopping with girls. He sumtimes forcefully goes if Lajjo Aunty asks as he can't refuse her anything.
Manav says, "Thik hai Rutu di, chahiye. Abhi nikalte hain toh jaldi wapis aa sakenge."
Sharad gets excited, "Haan Haan chalo, me chalunga apni Godma ke saath unhe shopping karwane. Mujhe ladikiyon ki choice bhi pata hai. "
Rutu asks, "Godma!! Mera naam rakha hai tune? Sunne me toh bahut mmm lagta hai.
Par iska matlab kya hai? Raaste me chalte chalte bata. Chalo Manav, Sharad jaldi chalo. Vasant me Sharad ko leke jaa rahi huu haan apne saath."
Vasant joins hands, bows down & says,"Haan leke jao Haan. Tum bhi jao." He thinks it's better he wil get a chance to pacify Varsha alone & Sharad wil get sum time to spend with Rutu. & When sharad isn't around it wil be easy for him to pacify Varsha. As she would talk to him when there wil be no one with whom she can talk. But for that he also needs to send Hemant & others out. As Hemant being around currently would be difficult for him.
Sharad before going sees Varsha as if asking permission from her. She smiles at him. He then looks towards Vasant & realises he is thinking sumthing. He immediately decides to read his mind. But before he could do Rutu hit him on his head lovingly & drags him out.
Anna thinks sumthing & says, "Ronnie bhaiya, me apni friend Vanita ke saath bahar jaa rahi huu." Ronnie nods his head & tells her to go safely.
Vasant says to hemant, "Ae gende, jaa Teri Bhairavi didi akeli hogi abhi, usse company de. "
Hemant immediately does, "Heeen" & runs towards Bhairavi's house.
Bhadresh, Ronnie, & murlidhar were there still & murlidhar started his orders of snacks, "Ghotali jara chai nashte ka kuch bandobast karo, hiheen" saying this he was about to sit on sofa but before that Vasant spoke, "Ojha uncle aapke aur baki sab ke liye nashta Bhairavi bana rahi hai. Toh aap log wahan jayiye. Phir uska banaya nashta waste ho jayega." But the 3 idiots weren't ready to move so he picked them up with his superpower & left them outside Bhairavi's house & said, "wahan jayiye Haan" & goes inside his house & closes the door.
Varsha glares Vasant but Vasant smiles mischievously at her. It was as if both were talking with their eyes. Varsha turned her face to go inside but Vasant rolled towards her & stopped her. "Varsha meri baat toh suno!! Varsha!!" But Varsha won't listen. She moved ahead & Vasant behind her. & This goes on.
While going to market Bhavana was telling them what all happened at Ghotalas. & start thinking that a girl from some other planet loves Vasant & Varsha was happy seeing her, plus she fought with Vasant for her. They decide to have a talk with Varsha & warn her to keep Rutu away from Vasant as they feared she would separate both Vasant-Varsha. & also ask why is Vasant acting as if he hates Rutu. They reach market & start their favorite bargaining & arguing abt quality with vendors.
A person in the market who was purchasing sumthing saw these ladies, & decided to move other side so they won't see him. He moves to other side of market. There he overhears 2 persons who were talking sumthing of his interest.
" Aae Bhai kya soch raha hai?"
"Kal raat wali item ke baare me soch raha hu re. Kya mast chikna maal thi."
"Aae pagal, tereko ladki ke alawa aur kuch nai sujta kya? Woh item jiski wajah se humko boss ka itna maar pada tha. Saara chori ke dhandhe ka waat lag gaya aur tu uske khayal me baitha hai?"
"Aae pagal tu hai, me us item ki baat nai kar raha, me toh woh kal raat ko chamkile ye bade gubaare me jo aayi aur phir thodi hi der me chalo gai hava me uski baat kar raha hai."
"Achha, itni door se tereko, woh dikh gai thi?"
"Haan Bhai, chikna maal aapun ko nai dikhega toh aur kisiko dikhega."
Saying this both started laughing loudly. The person overhearing them was first excited, then happy, then confused, & now super angry.
He immediately goes to some jungle where there is a old fort where there is a laboratary setup for experiment. There is a person in white coat, experimenting sumthing. This person comes in hurriedly & says, "Ek khabar hai, kal raat woh yahan ayi thi, lekin usne usse wapas bhej diya, aur woh chalo gai."
"Kya bol rahe ho? Sachme? Lekin woh chalo gai? Sachme? Yeh me nai man sakta. Woh toh kitni ziddi hai. Aur woh usse chod kar chalo gai. Yeh to naamumkin lagta hai."
"Haan, woh toh hai, par usne usse gusse se jane kaha hoga to woh chali gai hogi."
"Ab phirse usse yahan bulane ka bandobast karna hoga."
"Haan, aur mujhe those woh paise do abhi un dono aadmi ko paise ki lalach deke le aata huu. Unko zarurat padegi. Aur woh chor uchake lagte hai to paise dikhakar kaam ban jayega. Dawai ki zarurat nai padegi."
He goes taking money with him & meets those theives & promise them of more money & takes them. Thieves follows the man in greed, not knowing that this man wil b end of them. As after getting their work done they wil be killed brutally.
End of Chapter 5 
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