Part 14 B
"The reason I didn't want you to get pregnant was because... because..." I said, struggling to find the words to explain the situation to her.
"Because?" she asked softly, looking at me with wide eyes.
"Because after the complications of your first pregnancy, the doctor said, if you become pregnant again... that... that there are high chances of you losing your life," I managed to get out.
She looked at me with a shocked expression, and I felt my heart drop just by watching the heartbreak take over her features.
Her expression clearly conveyed her heartbreak and pain.
I wanted to do something to make it better
I wanted to hold her tight and tell her I loved her so much, and that none of that would matter, because we could adopt or find another method to conceive.
We wouldn't need to resort to pregnancy.
However, the damage had already been done. Geet is already pregnant.
"Geet ... I'm sorry," I apologized as fresh tears invaded her eyes.
My hand touched her shoulder softly, but Geet unlocked the door and got out of the car.
I got out of the car too and followed her as she walked into the hospital, in a trance she was walking in a zombie-like manner, like nothing mattered.
She wasn't watching for traffic, and if I wasn't with her, I was afraid that she might have gotten run over by now.
I followed her into the hospital and all the way to the reception.
"I - I n - I need to see a gynecologist," she said to the receptionist.
"I - I'm pregnant, and there are com - complications."
The receptionist directed us to the gynecologist's office, and we waited outside in the waiting room until it was our turn.
"Geet, talk to me," I said to her, as we were waiting in the waiting area, sitting next to each other.
She just looked ahead and ignored me.
I touched her hand softly, but she removed it from my grip and stood up, before she started to pace back and forth in the waiting room.
I decided to give her some time
I didn't even know the extent of her medical condition.
After the meeting with the gynecologist, I was hoping we would have more information... perhaps everything would be okay, and the pregnancy would not be a threat to anyone.
After all, it had been over five years since the complication had been brought up maybe there was a ray of hope somewhere.
When we entered the gynecologist's office, I explained to the gynecologist the situation.
Geet was pregnant, and over five years ago, Geet was told she shouldn't be pregnant due to the complications from her first pregnancy posing as a possible threat to her life in her succeeding pregnancies.
The gynecologist performed some tests on Geet and said that the report would be out in a couple of hours, and she asked us to wait in the waiting room, until they were out.
The whole time, Geet hadn't said a word.
Geet continued to pretend that I didn't exist, and I didn't even try to speak to her
I knew she didn't even want to acknowledge me right now.
How could I blame her? She had just received such a huge shock.
Three hours later, the gynecologist called us back in.
"Alright Mr. and Mrs. Khurana," she said,
"I have examined your reports, and I have to tell you that if you don't abort the fetus by the end of the week... the risks attached to following through with this pregnancy will grow exponentially. Right now the fetus is small, we are barely six weeks into the pregnancy.
If the fetus is aborted now, Geet will be okay just take extra precautions for next time. However, if we wait, then the chances of hemorrhage or death will increase significantly.
It will be almost certain that the pregnancy will not work out there is over a 85 percent chance that Geet will not make it through the pregnancy, and neither will the child.
So, my advice is to abort, but the decision is ultimately up to the two of you."
I looked at Geet, as if it was obvious what we would need to do if the child wouldn't make it anyways, it made more sense to terminate the pregnancy.
"I refuse to abort my baby," Geet then said firmly,
"Even if there is less than a 0.01 percent chance, I will take the chance and I will go through with my pregnancy, even if it kills me."
I glared at her she was insane, and didn't know what she was saying.
"Doctor, please make an appointment for an abortion," I said firmly.
"We are going to terminate this pregnancy."
"It's my body," Geet said loudly.
"And I will not allow you guys to touch it.
Stay away. This is my body, this is my baby, and this is my life.
You aren't allowed to make any of these decisions for me."
She looked at me directly in the eye before she angrily said her next few words.
"I will put a restraining order if I have to Maan, so do not even come near me.
I don't trust you," she snapped.
Then tears filled her eyes, and she covered her mouth with her hand and ran out of the room.
My heart shattered into a million pieces at her harsh words
I cared about her so much. I couldn't lose her.
I loved her too much. I could die, but I couldn't let her die.
"Geet," I called out, and ran outside into the hallway, but she had already disappeared.
One whole week passed, and I didn't see Geet again.
I went crazy looking for her I went to the police station to file a missing person report, but they weren't of much help.
They said if she was an adult and left of her own will, there was not much they could do.
Even if they did find her, and she told them to leave, they would need to listen.
I was not only heartbroken and anxious, but I was also famished hungry to see My Geet again.
I felt like I was dying a slow, painful death when she disappeared.
I didn't even know when she would be coming back to me.
I didn't even know if I'd see her again.
One week later, I heard the front door open, and I bolted downstairs to see who came.
A smile lit up my face as I saw Geet .
I ran up to her and hugged her tightly, her face pressed against my chest.
She was perhaps pressed so tightly against my chest that she couldn't breathe, but I just wanted her to be with me I couldn't have her leave.
She grabbed my arms and pushed me off her.
"Don't touch me," she said sternly.
"Where did you go?" I asked her, cupping her face with my hands, not listening to her.
"Maan I'm going to leave again if you don't listen to me," she snapped.
I let go of her and looked at her, feeling hurt.
It was okay though at least Geet was safe in front of me.
"I'm here because I went to another doctor," she explained to me.
"The other doctor told me that I could give birth to a baby, and there is a higher chance of me dying, but my baby being safe."
I looked at her with shock she came back here just to tell me this?
"Sit down," I said to her, but she shook her head.
"No," she said seriously,
"I'm going to have my baby Maan... and I came to tell you,
that when I die or if I die, then the baby is your responsibility.
You have to take care of my baby and be a good father.
You may not have been a good husband, but I hope I can expect you to at least be a good father."
I didn't know what to say to her , perhaps I had been shot by multiple bullets, or even strangled, but I couldn't even form any words.
"Yes or no?" she asked impatiently.
"Geet ..." I said softly, finally finding my voice again. "Come here."
I held the top of her arms and tried to pull her towards me again just so I could hug her, but she remained stiff.
"Yes or no?" she asked again.
"No," I responded simply. "I will accept our baby only if you're here with the baby...
if you're not here, then neither will I be."
She glared at me like she didn't believe me.
"Look Maan , you can tell me all the mushy words and all the lies you want, but from now on, I'm not going to believe any of it," she snapped angrily.
"I know you don't love me as much as you claim you do... I know if I die, you'll live. So don't try to twist this around.
You have to accept this baby... that's final."
"I'm not " I started, but she interrupted me.
"Don't talk to me," she said seriously.
"I don't even want to look at you anymore, but I'm just tolerating you for my baby."
Then she turned around and started to walk out of the door, but I grabbed her wrist to stop her.
"You're staying here," I said to her, "And that's an order."
"You can't order me," she said, struggling to free her wrist from my grip,
but I was holding on too tightly.
"You have no choice but to listen," I ordered and started to pull her towards our bedroom.
I closed the door to our bedroom and Geet sat down on our bed, tears falling down her cheeks.
She was having a hard time I knew that.
I wanted to support her, but she had to understand that I wasn't against her. I truly loved her.
I wasn't pretending to love her.
"Maan I don't want to even look at you for another moment.
I feel disgusted to look at you seeing you makes me want to run away!" she yelled.
I fell to my knees on the floor in front of her and took both of her hands in mine as I caressed her knuckles softly.
"I know you are angry Geet . I am sorry for everyth-" I started, but was cut off by her.
"It's your fault Maan how do you feel knowing that it's only because of you I'm going to die?" she screamed.
"If you had told me the truth I wouldn't have stopped taking the pills but no, as usual you resort to lying!"
I felt like I got punched in the gut she was right. It was all my fault.
I kept the truth from her. Why had I gone and listened to her mother when she knew nothing about our relationship why have I caused this to My Geet
"I don't want you to die," I mumbled.
"I don't want to die either!" she yelled, tears streaming down her cheeks.
"Maan, I wanted to spend a lot of time with you...
I wanted to be in your arms, explore places with you.
I wanted to just love you! But what have you done?
You haven't just cut my life short, you've cut our life short!"
I squeezed her hands painfully.
"Geet, if I could take all the pain and sorrow off of your shoulders and carry your burden, I will.
If I could die, knowing that you will continue to live, I will.
I would die just to bring one smile to your face," I confessed to her, my heart aching with pain.
"Really?" she asked with disbelief.
"Really Maan ? I don't believe you
you're too cowardly to tell me the truth, how can you be brave enough to face death for the girl you constantly lie to!"
"I didn't tell you because you were depressed...
I didn't want you to fall further into depression," I told her truthfully.
"I don't care why you did what you did," she snapped.
"All I know is that it is your fault we are stuck here right now."
"I love you Geet ," I told her and brought her hands up to my lips.
She yanked her hands away and looked at me, as she hoarsely said her next few words.
"Because only a lover can commit a murder?" she asked sarcastically.
"Murder?" I asked her, feeling myself choke.
"If this isn't murder, then what is it Maan ?" she asked me hoarsely, her lips quivering.
"I give you permission to murder me then," I told her sincerely.
"If you consider this murder, I give you full permission to take my life."
"You will die a horrible death Maan ," she cursed, with full intensity - meaning every word she said.
"You will die everyday, because you have to witness me dying right in front of you.
And that is your punishment."
The next few days passed with Geet hardly speaking a word to me, and I just left her alone.
I didn't try to speak to her either, because annoying her or upsetting her was the last thing I wanted to do.
At night, while we'd sleep next to each other, our bodies would feel like they were miles away.
Then one day, a few days later, I heard Geet sobbing softly in the middle of the night. My eyes opened instinctively and I turned around to touch her shoulder. Her back was faced to me.
She turned around and climbed on my chest, her tears soaking my skin.
"I don't want to fight anymore," she sobbed. "I just want to be with you."
Then she held on to me much more tightly as she cried some more.
I stroked her hair.
"We won't fight anymore," I mumbled in response.
"We'll only be together. That's all nothing more, nothing less."
Her grip on me tightened it was like she was a small child who was scared of her mother leaving her.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
"I'm sorry for yelling.
I'm sorry for accusing you.
Let's just forget it all and live happily... please...
I don't know how much time there is."
I caressed her back as tears invaded my eyes.
"Don't talk like that," I said to her softly.
"We will be happy together. You and our baby will be okay."
She looked up at me with hope.
"Promise?" she asked me.
"I promise," I whispered to her softly and kissed the top of her head.
Then she relaxed in my arms and fell asleep quickly, and I smiled, happy to have Geet in my arms once more, after what felt like forever.
Now I only hoped, that we had forever to spend like this as well
363