Deepika Padukone: I can't be in volatile relationships

Actor Deepika Padukone says she will never be in a situation where she has to fight for her man. Ever again.

You've been on a roll. What was that one moment of epiphany for you as an actor?

It's been more on a personal level. A phase of my life that I went through a couple of years ago, broke me down and enlightened me too. It was about growing up, like Imtiaz Ali says through 'Rockstar.' But I don't like to talk about it. There's been a lot of self-discovery, a lot of learning, a lot of heartbreak included. Learning also came from the kind of films that I did and the kind of people I worked with.

All three films you did this year showed different forms of love. What is the love that you believe in? Have you been in a live-in relationship?

I've not been in a live-in relationship. But I've been exposed to various kinds of equations that can exist between people. When I came from Bangalore, it was black and white. Over the years, I've realised that there's more to what we see on a day-to-day basis. There are all kinds of relationships, all kinds of equations. I may not personally endorse them but I've begun to accept and understand that it's all okay. I'm nobody to judge the equations, however strange they may be. But at the same time, I go back to my home and live in the traditional way in which I've been brought up. I'll only move in with my husband. There's no question of a live-in relationship.



What if your man loved another woman?

Firstly, I'd try and avoid that situation. I wouldn't settle for that because I'm someone who needs to be loved and nurtured. I need my man to be mine.

You've never been in a situation where your man is in love with someone else and you had to fight to get him back?

I've been in that situation and for that very reason I wouldn't want to be in such a situation again. The relationship didn't work out for whatever reasons. But I need my man to be mine. I need attention from him. I need to be loved. I need to be nurtured. I also need peace and stability in my relationships. I can't be in volatile relationships.

Do you possess the same resilience as Mastani?

Yeah, I do. I do. That's why I could identify and relate to her. Feelings of destruction and pain are processed internally. She was not just a warrior by profession. She was also a warrior from within.

The passion between Ranbir Kapoor and you is palpable. Is it difficult to portray chemistry with an ex-lover?

It's not something that's crossed my mind while on set, 'Oh! I have had a personal equation with someone, and so now how is that going to translate'. I believe chemistry is based on the trust between two performers. What actually works is something intangible - being extremely comfortable in each other's presence.

Listen to songs from Deepika Padukone's films on Gaana.com

Is the comfort level similar with Ranveer Singh?

I guess so. I'd like to believe I have that with all my co-stars.

With whom do you believe you share the best onscreen chemistry?

How I can I choose? It's like asking you to choose between your father and mother or between your son and daughter. You can't.

Recently, Ranveer mentioned in an interview that you believed your chemistry was better with Ranbir while his was better with Anushka...

(Giggles) It was a joke. It was a conversation about something else, which was never meant to leak. But it did, and now I have to answer all these stupid questions. They are both very special for me. I can't choose one over the other.

Does working with an ex-boyfriend bring back certain feelings?

It doesn't give you a sense of deja vu but there's definitely a sense of familiarity. The smell, the presence, the physical comfort, there's a sense of familiarity. You know this soul, you know this person. You know everything. You know every beat. There is familiarity in that sense.

Ranveer must be really secure for you to be working with an ex?

Is he secure? You have to ask him. How secure or insecure is my boyfriend? I can't answer that question on his behalf. It would be unfair. But what I will definitely say is that I'm going to take a bit of credit for that. I also make it easier by being honest about my feelings for all the people in my life, good, bad, past and present. I'm very, very clear and honest that this is how it is. I make the relationship easier if at all.

Is it tough to live on your own with so much going on around you?

It's tough. Last night I realised a simple thing. I woke up coughing badly and I missed my mother. If she was there, she'd have come out of her room, slept with me or made sure I had the medicine. The more I work, the more I miss these little things. It's tough running a home.

Katrina Kaif gave an interview, which when read between the lines, suggested that she's not comfortable with the equation that Ranbir and you share...

I don't read between the lines. I take people at face value.

- Jitesh Pillaai