poetic thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Stunner Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 10 years ago
#1
Dear Friends,
This one is for Vidya. For her indomitable spirit in cheering us all up and for NEVER giving up on NR, inspite of NB. 😆

Sweetie, I wish this was better, but I realised, I am out of touch. Already.

Still, hope you will like it.

😃


...

The JOURNEY

'Cutting chai, cutting chai' the kids clamoured in unison as the AC bus sped across the highway, on their way to Karan's guest house in Karjat. They were already running late, courtesy the goons who had waylaid them some time back, in hope of finding some valuables on the passengers.

Now that the issue had been solved and the 4 goons behind bars, courtesy the local police station, the good mood returned and the kids resumed their game of Antakshari.

The others also joined them, trying their best to bring back normalcy to the otherwise upsetting situation.

Ragini waited for Nachiket to return to his seat, but he was busy chatting away with the Driver, trying to put him at ease. After all, there were long distances to be driven. As Nachiket settled down in the driver's cabin, Ragini closed her eyes, disappointment washing over her.

She struggled to control her disappointment and was surprised to realise how strong her feelings were for him, even after everything that had happened over the years.

'Saab', she could hear Sunny Tai addressing Nachiket. 'The kids want to stop for cutting chai ... what with this nice onset of monsoons. We will take maximum half an hour, Saab'

Ragini couldn't hear what the response was from inside the Cabin; but she could sense the bus slowing down after ten minutes or so. She was the last to alight from the bus, and she smiled at the excited banter of the kids around her, as they made way towards a busy tea stall. It had rained in this part of the country some time back, and the smell of the wet earth intoxicated her mind. She looked all around, and the different shades of green, in a fast approaching noon light, seemed to breathe life in all inanimate objects around them,it seemed.

She breathed in deeply, as Aagham and Suhaani joined her, talking nineteen to the dozen.

The helper at the stall greeted them and instantly cleared two narrow wooden benches for the party to sit, as they busied themselves with their order of tea and toasts.

Her heart constricted as she realised that Nachiket was not around with them - she spied him standing by the bus, stretching out. She knew well how sitting for long distances irked him.

The stall owner came out and handed the glass of tea to all. Ragini, seated in the furthermost bench, away from the stall, towards the road twirled her glass of tea around. The warmth of the freshly prepared tea, seeping through the confines of the glass, warmed her otherwise cold palms. She sensed Dr Aman waving at her, trying to catch her eyes; but she was in no mood to chatter away - she needed her own time to ruminate and decide.

This journey seemed to be the last straw for her - it would either break her or make her.

Ragini was sure of that.


...


Sunny Tai walked upto Nachiket and asked chirpily

'Saab, aapko cutting chai nahi chahiye? Everybody is having a gala time. Look'

Nachiket looked back at the stall. Aagham was forcing his Mother to eat something, while Suhaani held Ragini by her shoulder. Dr Aman was busy clapping away.

His eyes darkened and he looked away.

'I prefer coffee to tea, Sunny Tai. You know that very well. Or have you forgotten as well?', he said as his eyes returned to the tea stall.

Sunny Tai looked down at the ground. She replied slowly

'There is coffee here as well. It's not that great, but maybe you would like it, at least it would warm you up.'

Nachiket nodded his head in negation. He asked

'Do we have enough water bottles in the bus? The driver was saying that we would need at least another hour and half to reach the Farmhouse, and that we couldn't stop anywhere else.'

'Saab, we only have 2 bottles of water left', Sunny Tai replied.

'Ok, I will go get some more bottles of water from that shop the other side of the road. There's a Bisleri hoarding, I see. And maybe, a few packs of juices, in case they have any. I will return in ten minutes. Hope you all will be ready by then.'

He started walking away ... his eyes fixed on the lights shining from the other store, situated a bit ahead.


...


'He is walking away' Ragini thought, as she watched him cross the road, swinging his arms to work out the imaginary kinks, it seemed. Her mind was in a complete mess; she was failing in this battle between her head and heart, this time. She took a deep breath and stared after him - as dusk settled in albeit reluctantly, aided by the monsoon clouds hovering over them.

The glass of tea had by now turned into a tasteless cold churn of brewed tea, milk and sugar - she looked out into the rapidly approaching dark, thinking of the direction her life seemed to be taking right now.

It seemed as if her heart and mind were both united this time in their mission, but she did not know how to control the present, not any more.

She spied him sitting in front of the other store, waiting for something. A few minutes later, the store keeper came out and handed him a big package containing water bottles it seemed, all neatly packed, to ensure easy travelling.

As he paid the store owner and stood up, a tot from the other table toddled over to him, bumping against his legs. She watched as Nachiket picked up the kid, twirled her around once, and then hugged her lovingly. He then walked over to the parents, seated in the next table, and tried handing over the kid to them. But the kid seemed to be in no such mood. Ragini's face curved into a small smile as she witnessed Nachiket patting the baby's back, and then walking around the store couple of times, as the kid spouted spit bubbles at him, while trying unsuccessfully to reach his phone kept in his shirt pocket.

This was how it was with Nishi, Ragini thought. The adoring Father and His Princess.

As much as she wanted, she could not tear her eyes away from the scene that was unfolding in front of her. At a distance, though. Her eyes misted over, as she could almost sense a much freer Nachiket, as he swung the child around.

At that very moment, he looked up towards the tea stall. He seemed to know. To sense that Ragini was looking out at him, from the other side of the road. Each seemed to know that these deep emotions would exist only for each other and nobody else would ever come in between, though their differences had kind of crippled their existences.

As if on cue, he returned the kid to the parents, and picking the package up, he started walking towards the bus.

Depositing the package with Sunny Tai, Nachiket boarded the bus and settled down at the Driver's Cabin once again. The others boarded the bus one by one, excited about the remaining part of their journey.

Ragini was the last to board the bus. As she bent forward to close the door, the bus started, causing her to nearly lose her grasp on the handle for once. In a split second, Nachiket was beside her, pulling her up above the steps carefully, yet protectively. He then closed the door of the bus behind them, all the while holding her closely in his arm.

As she searched for words to thank him, he looked deep down in to her eyes and muttered sadly

'I wish they could take better care of you. But then, neither did I ... maybe THIS is a good thing'

In a precious moment, Ragini felt the warmth of his love leave her, and she was left standing near the Driver's Cabin all bereft and cold.

As she made her way to her seat, her heart constricted in pain, as she recognised the unrecognisable truth of their lives - he would never stop loving her, but he would never come back to her now. He has accepted the inevitable. She knew Nachiket, he never believed in messing with other's lives. And this was what he was doing exactly.

Letting his love set her free

Letting her be happy

Gifting her that elusive freedom, that only lovers could do.


'But do you want it, Ragini?' Naani's voice broke through the veils of her thoughts as slowly sat down next to Ragini.

'Have you never loved him? Ever?' Naani asked once again.

Seated away from the others, Ragini broke down in the arms of the one woman who loved both of them unconditionally. The woman who herself was not in her full senses, due to her illness, but who definitely was sensible enough to recognise true love when she saw it. And realised it.

'I don't know what to do Naani. It's too late. I wish I could tell him ...'

Naani patted her back affectionately, as Ragini cried some more.

The Bus sped along the highway, towards its destination - clueless of the hidden tears and heartbreaks on board.



FINITO

Edited by poetic - 10 years ago

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Vidya.CV thumbnail
10th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#2
Rachna meaning "creative work or design".

Edited by Vidya_Bng - 10 years ago
RaginiJoshi thumbnail
10th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#3
Me third!
*Unres*

Wow di! Emotional kar diya😳 You make me search my dictionary every time you write! This one was a beautiful flow of emotions.. Less dialogues.. More emotions..And you described all those in such a way that it was felt deeply..as if I am in their place. The way Ragini observed him and the flow of emotions following his each and every action; I could really feel it. You made me realize how much I love them😳 His affection for that kid and Ragini relating it to the love he shared with Nishi, that was the best! I loved it how she gave in to Naani. She understands her better, always.

Beautiful!
Edited by RaginiJoshi - 10 years ago
metoyou thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail Networker 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#4
You should have put a disclaimer: read at your own risk and keep the tissue box next to you.

Rula diya yaar ...
This is such a deep, intense and sad journey. I feel so so so bad for NeiRa
I loved the way you emphasized more on Ragini's feeling and brought out her emotions. Their unbroken love is so so so beautiful yet so so so painful. The last scene was really emotional, the way Ragini broke down in her mother's arms 😒
This was beautiful. Thank you so much! Feels good to read your work 😳

You have not lost the touch at all dear. There are many good writers but great ones are hard to find and you are definitely one of those rare ones 😳
metoyou thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail Networker 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#5
Okay something went wrong...edited my comment 😊
NeiRaFreak thumbnail
10th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#6
Rachna ... Thank You 😳 this is like a soothing balm ... really... don't know what to say , am speechless ... but yes this is beautiful ...
and this part and dialogue "I wish they could take better care of you. But then, neither did I ... maybe THIS is a good thing" clouded my vision ...

You are simply a beautiful beautiful writer and am out of words to praise this piece of yours ... a big THANK YOU dear for writing this 😳


sun29 thumbnail
18th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 10 years ago
#7


this is absolutely a beautiful piece..if only if only we could see such sensitivity..the whole time i imagined RR and PK enacting this scene...if only they would focus on ragini's feelings for once ,other than the many nonsensical scenes...

thank you so much rachna for such a heartwarming scenario..ragini has to take that step towards him now...she send him away...she needs to bring him back...he is as heartbroken as she is ...if she masks it behind a cold existence ,he masks it behind his anger and bitterness...
EtherealRati thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail + 5
Posted: 10 years ago
#8
Awwwe that was reallyyy sweett...loved reading it .
poetic thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Stunner Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 10 years ago
#9

Originally posted by: RaginiJoshi

Me third!

*Unres*

Wow di! Emotional kar diya😳 You make me search my dictionary every time you write! This one was a beautiful flow of emotions.. Less dialogues.. More emotions..And you described all those in such a way that it was felt deeply..as if I am in their place. The way Ragini observed him and the flow of emotions following his each and every action; I could really feel it. You made me realize how much I love them😳 His affection for that kid and Ragini relating it to the love he shared with Nishi, that was the best! I loved it how she gave in to Naani. She understands her better, always.

Beautiful!


Thanks Ragini. 😊
Writing after a long time - the heartbreak is getting to me.

Super Naani is a NR camper, all the way. The fact that she loves both N and R is very important, given that she probably realises that these two would only be happy with each other.

What surprises me is that we already see NR fighting and bickering, or romancing. It's almost like being a pendulum swinging from one extent to another, forgetting that there are moments in between as well.

I so wish we could have seen their internal contemplations as well ... that is just starkly missing from the entire Show. No depth in emotions. Sad, but true !
poetic thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Stunner Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 10 years ago
#10

Originally posted by: metoyou

You should have put a disclaimer: read at your own risk and keep the tissue box next to you.


Rula diya yaar ...
This is such a deep, intense and sad journey. I feel so so so bad for NeiRa
I loved the way you emphasized more on Ragini's feeling and brought out her emotions. Their unbroken love is so so so beautiful yet so so so painful. The last scene was really emotional, the way Ragini broke down in her mother's arms 😒
This was beautiful. Thank you so much! Feels good to read your work 😳

You have not lost the touch at all dear. There are many good writers but great ones are hard to find and you are definitely one of those rare ones 😳


LOL about the Disclaimer 😆. Only Nb's shows should have them, something like - You have to donate part of your organs while in the process of watching this Show

Actually, I didn't start this to emphasise on Ragini's emotions at all; it just happened. That's how any normal human being would react, under these dire circumstances. we hardly see anything from Ragini's side, though we know how badly she misses him, as well. The Antakshari was a subtle hint.

It was Super Naani in whose arms she cried, not the useless Thepla Ben's. 😕
Edited by poetic - 10 years ago

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