Chapter 6: Revival
It took forty-five minutes to cajole her sister and get her ready for college. Khushi generally had on and off mood swings which made her bunk classes and laze around at home. On those days she would generally sleep late and also sleep in till noon. But the Khushi Payal was trying to wake up was awake since long time and had her eyes fixed on ceiling. It unnerved Payal to see her sister to be brooding this early in morning and also be extremely quiet. Even when she was being ragged by girls, she hadn't hesitated to go to college and had faced her day with enthusiasm. But brooding Khushi rarely made an appearance and as per Payal, the reason wasn't something silly or juvenile. There was something going on with Khushi and she was trying to avoid it.
When Khushi defiantly ignored Arnav who was trying to catch her eye, Payal chuckled to herself and waved a goodbye to her sister. Khushi seemed to talk nonstop about her classmate, Arnav, a few days earlier and now they were already in argument and ignoring phase.
After that fateful encounter early in morning, Khushi had stuck to her desk for most part of morning classes and she could practically feel Arnav sitting two desks behind her. He was someone she could not ignore and his presence had left a mild signature in the class. She had spaced out in one of the classes and thanked her lucky stars that the professor had not called out on her to answer a question. The class was surprised when neither Arnav nor Khushi picked up the argument bait which was thrown in by their very strict professor. He had advised the class on the presentation techniques for their semester project and had even thrown in an open ended question. Arnav and Khushi dutifully stared at the front without bothering to take the question and argue about it. Their professor had looked mildly disappointed and their class openly stared at them. Their unnatural quietness was affecting class dynamics immensely.
The much awaited apology had come during lunch. She wasn't in a mood to sit with her sister at canteen during lunch. So she had chosen a part of college campus recluse from the probing eyes and gabbing mouths. She had walked away from class without as much a backward glance. The skin on her back had felt the heat of his stares. She knew that he was trying to get a moment alone with her to apologize to her. She had seen his eyes overflowing with guilt when she had seen him at college gates in the morning. But she had ignored him. She wanted him to bake in that guilt and feel the pressure clobbering him from all directions. And after a few hours she felt ashamed of her own actions. She wasn't always this vindictive. She generally punished who she thought wronged her but once the moment of punishment passed, she took them to nearest hotel and bought them a meal. But with Arnav her moral forces were behaving differently. She wished she understood why her reactions changed when it came to Arnav.
She coughed on spicy pickle and a bottle of water conjured in front of her. She stared at the eyes of the owner who nodded and probed her to take the bottle. She nodded back and picked the bottle up and drained three quarters of it. He stared at her when she drank water as if she was parched all her life. Once finished, she handed him the almost empty bottle back to him and gave him a tiny smile. They had spent rest of the lunch period in silence both contemplating on the things which had happened between them for past couple of weeks. He laid down on grass with his palms locked under his head. He smiled a small smile when he felt her lying down next to him. It was one of those moments when companionship made things warmer and brighter around people. A haze set around them and the early afternoon sun shone brightly above them. The smell of grass dazed their senses and honeyed warmth provided serenity. They relaxed in that recluse part of the campus for more than an hour and half and only sighed when they heard the distant sound of hurried feet followed by silence marked end of the lunch hour.
His apology was not verbal and her forgiveness wasn't obvious. They showed it in their actions and both were comfortable with that.
Once finished with lunch, they had gone back to being what they were. The guilt was lifted, the hurt was vanquished and animosity was subdued.
Payal was happy to see that Khushi's spunk was back and her animated hand moves and cinema references were all back in full swing. She had missed this Khushi. It was strange to see her oscillating mood due to a guy. She didn't voice out what she thought her sister was going through. She smiled through her sister antics of teasing one of her classmate by imitating a popular cinema star during afternoon break. She didn't ask her sister about her disappearing act during lunch hour or the reasons for her mood to be lifted presumably during lunch hour. She loved to see her sister smile and laugh gaily and any questions which made her squeamish would drop that smile off her face. Payal joined the fun and stopped thinking about her sister's moodiness.
Khushi's ears had perked up when she had heard droplets of water splattering on the window. She loved rain and monsoon was her favorite season. Coming from a small town which was predominantly a farming community, her affection for rain and the way the community celebrated first rain was altogether a different experience. She was hit by sudden wave of melancholia and traced the pattern of water droplet from the drier side of the window. She knew that Arnav was probably looking at her oddly and wondering why she broke the conversation and was now standing by the window.
It was late in afternoon and most of her peers had left college. She and Arnav were meeting up to discuss more about their project and to decide upon a subject. Keeping their latest peace pact on mind both had walked half way and had shook upon it. During middle of discussion she had observed rain and was thoroughly distracted. Before Arnav could stop her, she walked away from library and to the open courtyard and swirled under the rain. Arnav could only stare at her openly. She told Arnav how farmers of her hometown celebrated something as simple as rain. It gave them hope of season and end to summer heat. She trilled in laughter when she saw him taking tentative steps into open courtyard and finally sat on one of the benches. He refused to swirl and twirl in the rain but he wanted to enjoy the same. And thus the books lay forgotten for the rest of the evening.
Once back home she had hit showers for a warm bath and had swooned when Payal brought her hot tea. She wanted to write first about experiencing first rain of the season in a new city with an acquaintance.
Sunlight captures us in its honeyed belly
Scent of grass sings us an old lullaby
The first rain washes off bad blood
And his dimples catches errant rain drop
A thin curtain of steady rain separates us
And his profile making a watercolor painting
The verse didn't give her the satisfaction she had felt during two times that day. When she had slipped next to Arnav under early afternoon sun, her head become heady with scent of grass and the man next to her and the warmth had made her whole body light. She shivered. She wanted to see what library guy had to say for her last poetry.
I found that missing heartbeat buried in sand at the distant shores. The heat had turned it to glass; fragile and sparkling.
If founders are keepers, then will it make me the owner?
Library_Guy
She didn't know what to make out of his words. She found them alluring and absolutely flirty. Well it wasn't flirty in classical sense but from the words he had shared with her till date, this was the most obviously lighter one. She didn't delve much into the psyche of library guy. She knew if she ventured any close to the way he was thinking, she would be neck deep in trouble. Payal asked her what she was dreaming about. She hadn't shown Payal her works or the comments she had received till date. She wasn't purposefully hiding these virtual interactions with a stranger from her sister. She just wanted to have a bubble of her own where only she and those words existed. She found it hard to explain the need for being like that but only that she wanted something like that. Till she got comfortable with the thought and idea of library guy, she would keep these interactions to herself.
~~~~~oo000oo~~~~~oo000oo~~~~~oo000oo~~~~~oo000oo~~~~~oo000oo~~~~~
His mother had her mouth open when she saw her ever serious son grinning like a maniac and drenched from head to toe. She had fussed around him by pushing him to get changed and towel dried his hair. Arnav was silent all along and she initially thought that he was in one of his moods. But she was surprised to see that he was sporting a barely there smile which had been on his face for quite some time. Her son's mood oscillated between grumpy and happy and of late she was also seeing broodiness and serenity. There was something going on in her son's life and he wasn't sharing. Had she thrown in a small tantrum, he would have confessed to everything he was going through. But she wanted him to feel all those confusions that a guy of his age would feel. Talking to her would mean that he would psychoanalyze every little thing that was happening around him and all the feelings would be dissected and put out on display. She didn't want her son to do that.
When she brought him tea in his room, he was in front of his computer staring down the words displayed. When asked, he simply shook his head. His face had become gentler and his eyes softer. She didn't disturb him in this state but took a mental picture of her son. It was picture of a guy discovering someone with who he could emotionally bond with.
The words he had been staring at had enveloped him in their clutches. He couldn't help but smile at the words of comfort given by a stranger. Though his state of mind had changed drastically from the time when he posted his last post, it still gave him comfort. It thrilled him to know that a person could understand his abstract thoughts and actually reverberate accordingly. That moment he wished he knew who small town girl was. The yearning he felt for her wasn't in romantic sense but in terms of a companionship where he would be most comfortable.
Hold your breath, stiffen your body
Close your eyes clasp your hands and pray
Redemption is only three words away.
Shall I now carry you home?
Smalltown_Girl
She had gently told him to apologize to whatever mistake he had done. He was glad that he didn't have to elaborate further and she had caught on whatever he had initially intended. He found an unknown attraction for this girl who wrote pretty words and gave him words of comfort for free. He wondered perhaps for the first time about identity of the girl. She obviously went to the same college as his. If he wanted to he could perhaps find out very easily. It wouldn't take much time to do a logical deduction and by reading all her entries. But he refrained himself from doing so. She must have had her own reasons for not disclosing her name just like him. He didn't want to take that privacy away from her. Whatever she was in real world didn't matter who she was in this world. In this world she was his companion. He was suddenly hit by memory of a girl swirling in rain and chuckling gaily. The words came down with that memory.
Swirling, twirling, purling, whirling
Footsteps, anklets and puddle of water
A melodious cacophony and
Montage of treasured memory
He smiled at the memory and his words. He ran his fingers on the words which felt like old cousins. He wondered how their project would proceed now as they had finally let the animosity between them run cold.
It bought a smile on his face.
Ye Hai Mohabbatein
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