My family is slipping away from me

leavesandwaves thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 10 years ago
#1
My family slipping away from me.

No Ganga, it is your perception.

Jagya loves and respects you and trusts you. He only expects all the three things from you. He does not demand but he wants you to do so voluntarily. You love him and you also respect him but you should trust him more. You want the same things from him, same attention from him. But he is now middleaged and middleaged people face a crisis and they are not what they were when they were in the early stages of marriage. You are also middleaged and you are not accepting him fully the way you accepted him once.

Your sons love you and they want you to understand their compulsions and weaknesses. With Abhi, you have to be more strict, with Mannu you have to be less strict. They are growing and they are becoming individuals in their own right. One day they will leave their nest and fly away due to career compulsions or marriage. They may still stay with you but they will have their own lives and priorities. You will always be there for them and they will always be there for you.

You cannot own anyone except yourself. You can only form relationships. Build them and nurture them.

Created

Last reply

Replies

94

Views

7.6k

Users

22

Likes

383

Frequent Posters

GoodDoc_2105 thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Visit Streak 180 Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 10 years ago
#2
Family is indeed slipping away from her because she herself lost grip on her life.
Her husband does love and respect her and trust her.But he in his way did contribute to some of the insecurities she has right now like that constant comparison with his previous wives.She could have stopped that instead she chose to deal it in an aggressive way and that aggravated the problem.
Abhi needs times and understanding Mannu needs to be trusted more.
Abhi and Mannu - they are children and what they are facing right now are nothing insolveable.
All these things just seem to drive her into her comfort zone protective shell or escaping from reality.

She instead of facing these problems head on slipping away into her comfort zone which is work.

If she continues to slip into her shell and away from reality to escape from these problems her family will definitely slip away from her because she let that happen.


Shinya thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#3
@leaves, nice post...😆
the way she walks around with a long face singing.. koi lauta de mere beete hue din... nobody can explain anything to her. She is best left alone to find her own solution.
RTee thumbnail
21st Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail Commentator Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#4
In a joint family, when everybody is busy in their own lives doing their own thing one can either
- participate in other people's conversations by showing interest in those activities,
- get them interested in yours through active two-way interaction and constant sharing of events in your life
- or build one's own life and stop feeling left-out if one does not become the centre of attention.

Sharing and involvement is the key.

Ganga needs to start sharing more and getting others involved in her life, in the things that interest her.

This is Ganga's house. She should stop feeling like a guest in her own house.
GoodDoc_2105 thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Visit Streak 180 Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 10 years ago
#5
Ganga troubles some of them are not imagined but real problems specially wit her husband and children but her approach is what is the bigger problem.
Lonliness and feeling alienated from the rest is a problem which is created by herself.

She is living in her own home, surrounded by her own family as her husband by her side she got a career still she feels sorry for her self?

Why does she not look around in her own home?There are two other women who had to rebuild their lives after they have been blown apart and they still have something positive to look forward to in the worlds they have created for themselves.

Anandi's life shattered she lost her husband and within few months she lost her baby and she lost the family she was displaced from her own home which she made for herself after marriage now she is living in a place which she doesn't consider her own home What does she have now? Why don't we see her sitting and crying and feeling sorry for herself?

Dsa she spent most of her life as widow with no husband by her side to help her bring up her children she did everything on her own. When she realised her kids are grown up and have their own lives and they don;t need her she got herself educated and now she puts her energy and time for the benefit of the people who need help.

Compared to these two women doesn't Ganga have much more in life?
Manahil1 thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Explorer Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#6
This is no middle age life crisis The fact is Jagya loves her a lot even now Everything was fair and fine between them until she did not utter that nonsense to him and hurt him so much , abused his love for her Thats when he turned serious and sad and he even told her that That is the thing which is hurting him even now then how it became middle age life crisis ? How a person is suppose to react after getting such blames on him even when he has given so much love to her and given so many assurances to her she means to world to him and he is so happy he can move on from his past and have her in his life ? Ganga honest;y has no logic no reason to be insecure
and this total wrong to say he in his way hascontributed in her insecurities by his constant comparisons to his previous wives What?Hello when he was constantly comparing her to his previous wives Can the ones who are blaming him tell ? He repeated her own words what she herself used to say Anandi and dr sahab are my role models but i am not like them will consider my self fortunate if i become like them She says its perfect he said same she became insecure and he is here blamed he contributed her insecurities by constantly comparing her to his previous wives ?How fair is this to blame him ?

Ganga is my favorite but this is utterly wrong and illogical to say he contributed in her insecurities by his constant comparisons to his wives He never compared her with his previous wives He never did any wrong

He has given her enough assurances she means world to him and he is so happy he can move on from his past and call her a blessing in his life

She heard him telling Anandi on that terrace how lucky he is to have Ganga in his life so?

He has never involved Anandi in his personal life she did Why she was calling his ex wife and share her pain with her when she had complications in her pregnancy?

Why she called his ex wife to take her suggestion how to bring shyam lal's truth in front of him

Why she brought Anandi ji and her sorrow in their conversation when he was praising her and encouraging her to become a doctor but she compared herself to Anandi and said my happiness looks too less to me in front of Anandi ji's sorrow How many times he cried in front of her after Shiv's death bechari Anandi but she brought Anandi ji and her misery in their conversations a few times even when he did not mention Anandi anywhere ?

so how fair is that of her to label him as character dheela ?and people are finding fault with her he contributed in her insecurities?please Watch serial then blame others

He has not even kept Anandi in house He said nothing in this whether Anandi should stay or not in BH but he did ask from Ganga he does not want her especially her to be hurt in this anyway She assured him holding his hand she trusts him so she has no problem with Anandi's stay here She knows everything about him and Anandi because he has hid nothing from her He asked i know you have always trusted me and also know you have great respect for Anandi in your heart but still this is sensitive situation I don't want anyone to be hurt even unintenionally unknowingly ESPECIALLY YOU.. she assured him she will not have any problems and believe me Dadisaa's decision is complete right we all will live like a family He did not say a word to Anandi to stay in BH It was Dadisaa and Ganga then how fair is that of her blame him like this and be insecure and we blame Jagya for it He contributed in her insecurities by his constant comparisons to his previous wives ? Dadisaa used to do that Jagya here did not compare her with Anandi he repeated her own words what she used to say


No she has no logic no reason to be insecure and blame him like that


Jagya's enemies too know if they want to destroy him give him most painful death destroy his Ganga because Ganga is his biggest strength and biggest weakness too and this is why LPS kidnapped Ganga and wanted to kill her and Jagya saved Ganga risking his own life Ready to die for her yet she blames him like this She acts insecure ... So wrong ... so unjustified , very big injustice she did with him

and he still loves her and still trusts her but he is hurt he is deeply hurt and why he should not be He has given everything to Ganga He can die for her Take her death on him and he showed that He has proved his love for her again and again .but she has forgotten all that and blames him like this then how hurt he would be

but she does not realize she needs to heal him She does not realize he needs his same Ganga who was understanding to him , he needs her love and care She needs to realize they need a new beginning She needs to realize right now she needs to make him feel all loved She hurt him emotionally she needs to heal him too but all she is doing is wallowing in self pity waiting for miracle he forgets all that otherwise she gets tensed everything is slipped out of my hands

Jagya does not need to prove anything to her Time to time he has proved she is more precious to him over his life He told her he was stuck in his past but happy he could move on from it because of that he could meet her she is a blessing in his life so she has no reason to blame him like that and be insecure She is responsible for her own insecurities and his sadness too and time for her rectify her mistake and prove to him she loves him a lot and ashamed of what she spoke Time for her to take him along with her to new beginning
Edited by _Manahil_ - 10 years ago
BeautyBabe thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail Engager Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#7
How this has become middle age life crisis when here he have a husband who has been wounded at his heart by his wife whom he loves more than his life and he has proved that to her so many times and she put unfair blames on him insulting him and his love for her All that he gave to her in a minute ? That one moment indeed went above 1000 moments He even told what is pain is still in his heart what is disturbing him still and he is fair enough to think like this The injury she gave to him it became soar in all these 5 years that took his smile away from him and she has done nothing to show him she is ashamed of what she spoke and neither make him feel she loves him a lot , she respects him she trusts him

Jagya still loves her a lot , trusts her , respects her but what she has done to show him she is sorry for her for those blames She was wrong unfair to him All she told him can't you forget that? Such blames by a loved one how much hurting they are does she realize it if she does that than come on rectify but she is sulking in sadness thinking everything is slipping our of my hands He does not need me anymore

Really she has no logic no sense to behave like this All i can understand she has lost it The real Ganga in her is lost somewhere and she needs to face her real self

She had no sense to blame Jagya like that the way she did

She hurt him so bad Her blames on Jagya were complete nonsense She had no reason to blame him like that No right . Jagya has given so many assurances to her she is his world , his life and that he is so happy he could move on from his past which includes Anandi and Gauri both and meet her He not only said but he proved

How can she think he will back away from his responsibility towards her when even when she was his beneficiary no matter it became risking to his life , no matter he has to bear scoldings of his mother still he helped her and completed her responsibility making her stand on her feet and get rid of Ratan

What she does not know about him He told her everything She even knows the time she met him he was struggling to move on from his past He married her confessing his love to her and that marrying her made him face a lot much anger from his family They wanted him to leave her Dadisaa clearly asked Ganga to leave from his life He said where Ganga will stay i will stay there too Dadisaa asked him then you have to leave from here Hospital is not yours either He was disowned by his family He was pained deeply pained Tears could not stop flowing down from his eyes but he held her hand and asked her not to leave him Everyone left him if she too did he will break down completely

She was one for sake of his happiness asking him he can go back to his family she will never complain to him He can get everything back the family has problem with her not with him but he was no We will make family accept us both

How can Ganga forget all this and doubt his love for her . ?

How many times he told her what place she holds in his life In their SR he told her my life was like a lonely boat in a fast flowing river No direction , neither knew where I have to go , what I have to do then you came to my life I got a direction to my life I got a purpose to live and later I realized you are the only one with whom I want to live all my life You are God 's answer to my prayers

How can Ganga forget all this Seeing his love and respect for her she used to say to him I pray to God he makes you my life partner in each birth of mine so how can she doubt his love for her

He has always been a good husband to her Never did any wrong to her never any injustice Told her she is his life He is so happy to have her in his life He was stuck in his past but so happy he could move on from it because that brought her in his life She is his prayer that God listened nothing is precious to him not even his life


Even his enemies know if you want to destroy him destroy Ganga then how can Ganga misunderstand him and be insecure ?

How can Ganga forget this is same man who was alright if he cannot have his own child because it will be risking to her life He only wants her to be with him as his life partner He can live without his own child but she took risk with her life thinking of only happiness of Dadisaa and give her great grand son from her blood line but Jagya was so hurt at it and he did not sleep even one night with patience All he was worried for her if anything to happened to her he will be devastated He cried for her , prayed for her life She is not unaware of that seriously she doubted this man's love for her ?

He did not keep Anandi in Badi Haveli it was Dadisaa who brought her now and Jagya asked from Ganga about her feelings if Anandi stayed in Badi Haveli She asked him how much you trust me He said more than myself She said i have same trust on you Jagya said i know you have always trusted me and i also know you have great respect for Anandi but still this is sensitive situation i dont want anyone to be hurt even unknowingly unintentionally especially you Ganga held his hand and assured him trust me i have no such problem , will never have Trust me Dadisaa's decision was absolutely right to bring Anandi here We all will live like a family and when Dadisaa was convincing Anandi to stay in Badi Haveli Jagya kept quiet He did not say a word whether she should stay here or not He said nothing He never asked Anandi to stay here but yes Ganga did assure Anandi from her side she has no problem with her stay in BH then how can she blame Jagya like this ? seriously it was so unfair of her to put these blames on Jagya

Anandi has been coming to Badi Haveli even before too and she used to push her leg in Jagya's life lecturing him It was Jagya who used to be irritated when Anandi used to lecture him but Ganga never took wrong meaning from it for Anandi It was Gauri who said that Anandi talks to Jagya like this she still has some right on him Ganga never said that

On that terrace she listened to what they were talking Jagya telling Anandi how lucky he is to have Ganga in his life

She heard Jagya firmly telling Subhadra when she was asking him Anandi ko dekh tumharay dil mein kuch kuch hota hai He said yes kuch kuch hota hai but that kuch kuch is my respect for her for whatever she has done for me in my life I only have respect in my heart for her nothing more than how can Ganga doubt him ?

Ganga is the one who agreed to Shivani's request and made a protesting Jagya agree too who was only protesting for her sake He does not want her to be in pain but she made him agree to hide their marriage from Gauri until she does not get well Ganga gave Jagya her kasam not to tell Gauri anything before time and Gauri she used every tactic to attract Jagya back to her but Ganga never for once was insecure that Jagya will be lured by Gauri and go back to her Such strong trust and faith she has on their relationship she did not misunderstand the situation when Gauri fell down and Jagya held her to stop her from falling down and Gauri's arms were around him and she was romantically eyeing Jagya Ganga came and she saw that Jagya tried to explain to her He said i know you always trusted me still i owe this to tell you actually... Ganga put her hand on his mouth telling him no need to give any kind of explanation i know you if i say i trust you than i mean it i can read your honesty and love for me in your eyes . Ganga did not even for once let any insecurity creep in her heart seeing Gauri's acts to have Jagya back in her life but what was in her heart she said in her monologue to devi maa that everyone is caught in a tight situation now Gauri has taken it to wrong side she has started expecting Dr sahab back to her but she does not know he has gone too far away from her and cannot go back to her Please get her well soon and let everyone come out of this difficult situation . This is Ganga and this is her faith on her relationship but suddenly she went bonkers now ?

and what wrong Jagya has done that she put that blames on him and became insecure ? He never involved Anandi in his personal life if he took his opinion in family matters than whats wrong in it ? Didnt Ganga herself said Anandi is part of their family now ? and Ganga herself has involved Anandi in their personal life Jagya never did Ganga called Anandi when she had complications in pregnancy and shared her pain with Anandi She called Anandi to take her suggestion how to bring shyam lal's truth in front of Jagya Ganga is the one who agreed to Dadisaa's decision to keep Anandi in Badi Haveli Jagya did not say a word in it

Ganga brought Anandi into their discussions a lot many times How many times after Shiv's death Jagya cried in front of Ganga about poor Anandi? Not for once but yes she brought Anandi in their conversations and her misery Just like when Jagya was praising and encouraging her to be a doctor she brought Anandi in their conversation and compared herself to Anandi telling Jagya i don't know i should be happy or not i find my success so less something to cheer about in front being sorrowful at Anandi ji's misery ? Did Jagya ask Ganga not to celebrate your success and be sad for Anandi ? No she herself said that Ganga herself brought Anandi in conversations even when Jagya did not mention her anywhere yet she is now minding him even talking to Anandi ? and putting blames on him

?

And this is utterly wrong to say he contributed in her insecurities by her constant comparisons to his wives Constant comparisons i don;t know which constant comparisons people are talking about when before leap Ganga was herself comparing herself to Anandi Anandi's pain and her happiness It was Dadisaa who constantly compared her In that scene what wrong he said ? He repeated Ganga's own words of considering Anandi her role model what she herself was saying to Subhadra i have learnt a lot from Anandi i am not like her but i try to follow what she taught me Dr sahab and Anandi ji both are my role models so what wrong Jagya said she minded so much ? when she herself calls Anandi and Jagya both her role models ?

Really she blamed him of trying to take advantage of shiv's death and become Anandi;s trying to get rid of her when he saved from her LPS kidnapping risking his own life Telling LPS you have enmity me kill me but leave my Ganga . He protected her like a shield in front of LPS trying to target her with bullet she was asking him to get away but he did not move This was all after Shiv's death ?

Ganga had no logic no reason to blame Jagya when he has never done any wrong to her Have always been a great husband to her and she hurt him so bad by putting such blames on him and then when he reminded her of that what has been hurting to all these 5 years and still hurts It has left such mark on his heart that he cannot remove it then why she does not try to heal him ? Of course that was so hurting to him In one moment Ganga has insulted his all his love for her She needs to show him she is ashamed of what she spoke He needs her love She is the one who made him believe in his goodness suddenly she put him so down then she needs to pick him up again He needs her love , faith and trust He needs his same Ganga back who made him smile and today she took his smile herself by unfairly blaming him He needs her but no she is still in misunderstanding and end up thinking seems like he does not need her anymore My family is slipping away from me I don't know what has happened to her Seems like after getting more educated and qualified she has lost her marbles


The Ganga i have defended 2 years and fought for her on this forum Today i have no defense for her All i feel sorry for Jagya The woman who taught him to breath again today hurted him so bad and she is in constant misunderstandings


and cvs have butchered Ganga's character so much She is not the Ganga post leap and sorry her so called real problems are no real but butchering of her character Ganga has faced no less in life than Anandi or Dadisaa before Jagya came in her life and changed her life She never wallowed in self pity even then the way she is now probably they are doing it only make Anandi more mahaan than her


Ganga is not the Ganga she was before I want old Ganga back



Edited by kikyo - 10 years ago
goofyCat thumbnail
12th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail Commentator Level 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#8

Originally posted by: RTee

In a joint family, when everybody is busy in their own lives doing their own thing one can either

- participate in other people's conversations by showing interest in those activities,
- get them interested in yours through active two-way interaction and constant sharing of events in your life
- or build one's own life and stop feeling left-out if one does not become the centre of attention.

Sharing and involvement is the key.



This reminds me of how Shiv and Anandi were perfectly dissolved in the big household of Shekhars simultaneously having their own small world with just two of them and their sunny boy

PS: sorry for the out of topic post but couldn't help remembering them reading this description
Edited by russhmeSS - 10 years ago
GoodDoc_2105 thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Visit Streak 180 Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 10 years ago
#9

Originally posted by: russhmeSS



This reminds me of how Shiv and Anandi were perfectly dissolved in the big household of Shekhars simultaneously having their own small world with just two of them and their sunny boy

PS: sorry for the out of topic post but couldn't help remembering them reading this description

Such beautiful marriage and family life they showed through Anandi and Shiv.
They too had their busy careers and large family which required their time and a kid who had special needs which had to be taken care of .
Their relationship grew from strength to strength with each family problem they encountered or a problem faced on work front.
How well they ironed out the difference of opinions they had
So all problems can't be attributed to just busy professional life.
RainbowKitty thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 10 years ago
#10
This is no middle age life crisis Ganga is simply butchered by our mahaan cvs probably people rightly predicted They are not going to show Dadisaa was wrong in tangling everyone life's in a mess by keeping Anandi in house and Anandi of course can never be wrong anywhere for them but they will make Ganga go bonkers and start hitting her innocent husband same they did She is behaving too different than how she was before leap in not so different situations Everything was same but then she was sane now total insane and cvs have no logical explanation for it Why sudden change in her behavior and that too so much Can a person change so much ? 😲

People are rightly saying Ganga needs to take inspiration from other two great souls in house Poor them lost so much and still have not lost grip on their life Ganga has everything yet she is wallowing in self pity Finally i understood what is cvs agenda here Thank you for this explanation 😛

I am not talking like a blind fan but this is a fact Ganga 's character is so behaving so different from leap

Ganga ... suddenly becomes insecure and put cheap blames on her husband That husband who has given her countless assurances she is his life and above all for him Why she got insecure now ? This he was constantly comparing to her with Anandi is pure assumption In that FB scene what they showed he only said what she herself used to say He only cited Anandi's example whom she herself calls her role model and she was making issue of why you bring Anandi in conversation ummm Ganga then why you yourself used to bring Anandi in conversations when he does not mention her anywhere and call her sometimes about your problems People have mentioned those scenes here i don't need to repeat? So suddenly why she acted insecure and end up putting this big blame on Jagya What did he do? he did not even keep Anandi in house and asked her again and again he does not want her to be hurt especially her hurt anyway in this so she forgot about all this ? She had memory loss? Suffered amnesia what happened to her ?She was accusing him he is trying to get rid of her really ? Shocked Probably she forgot not too long ago he saved her risking his life and that was after Shiv's death Probably Ganga forgot that too thats why she blamed him Ganga is suffering from memory loss i believe Cvs great logic otherwise how can she forget everything and only blame ?


Cvs want to make us believe this is same Ganga who agreed to shivani's request and giving Jagya her kasam not to open his mouth to Gauri until she does not get well She never got insecure then with Gauri's all acts to have Jagya back She never for once thought he will leave her and go back to Gauri She did not misunderstand that situation which kikyo has mentioned Gauri falling down Jagya has to hold her and Ganga came when Jagya tried to explain she put hand on his mouth no i know you if i say i trust you then i do I mean it and she was 100 percent true not only saying to make him feel better but she understood he can never think of Gauri that way

Here she is making issue of him taking name of Anandi He even mentioned so that what makes you have long face when i talk to Anandi you have problems with Anandi

Wah cvs what real writings Characters suddenly go opposite of what they were before

Ganga was living in a joint family before too how she was sharing everything that she needs to learn how things work in joint family ?She needs to share ? taking interest in activities How she was living in joint family before ? She always lived in joint family Singhs No? How she managed then that cannot manage now ? May be people can explain this too because JaGan solved so many family problems ?

Jagya his busy life is nothing new for Ganga She managed so well in past now she is making issue of such small things then how she managed in the past He was doing double duty before leap and they did show this track How Jagya got very busy after he became MLA so he would get less time to spend with her and she never nagged and complained She would wait for him at home after returning from work and share everything with him Thats why JaGan most of the scenes are night time They were professional couple To share all their days happenings the problems they face , their great experiences in day , family problems night time and their bed room is the place for them and Ganga would use that so now Ganga suddenly became nagging and complaining types over such small things you did not attend my call i wanted to tell you i got praised at hospital Really?

Cvs think we are bunch of fools They twist a character anytime they want and make her total opposite of what she a month ago For cvs 11 years must have gone for us its only a month Hello cvs ?
Edited by Hina- - 10 years ago

Related Topics

Top

Stay Connected with IndiaForums!

Be the first to know about the latest news, updates, and exclusive content.

Add to Home Screen!

Install this web app on your iPhone for the best experience. It's easy, just tap and then "Add to Home Screen".