Is ditching one's partner the only solution to marital conflict?

First Previous

Page

Frequent Posters

tannvi

@Badtameez_Dil

Trailblazer

+ 5

Posted: 11 years ago

#11

Loved ur post 👍🏼

Beautifully Expressed the Husband-wife relationship...Its about adjustmants..Its about compromises...its about how to make marriage workout..stay together living a Life..when grow older seeing through how long they have come together...

2 days bk when raman see Amma-Appa he tells same he wants to grow older with Ishu...

that how relationship to grow older with each-other ..make things work out nt for whom work out in relationship more who less...its about staying together...no competition is there in marriage...

they will fight with each-other..they use abusive language...they dont talk for days but when husband-wife yearn for each-other than no second thought or third person comes b/w them ...than its about each-other only...

Loved ur post...how much its sais Raman did this Ishu not done this..or Ishu done this raman didnt...like recently when they were yearning for each-other...want to talk...they just a holding each-other in there arms...clear all differences...

As yes they r still in growing the stage where conflicts..differences...fight will happen...how the scope of growing there relationship is there...in all this how they over-come these differences...distances ..do heart to heart talk...& come together make there marriage work-out that is what make there relationship beautiful to watch...

Quote

nb.neha

@nb.neha

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#12

Having said that I would also mention that divorce is not the only situation. Let it be the last resort.

My ques here is what is the pt that can be called as the stepping stone of this last resort? How much is too much? What is too much? M asking so bcoz everytime a woman has a prob she is adviced to give it a try once again ; give a sec chance... n life goes on like this. Only physical harassment is not the only thing. Mental torture also exists.

Quote

Looks like you are new here. Register for free, learn and contribute.

Janaki

@RamKiSeeta

Achiever

+ 6

Posted: 11 years ago

#13

Originally posted by: nb.neha
Having said that I would also mention that divorce is not the only situation. Let it be the last resort.
My ques here is what is the pt that can be called as the stepping stone of this last resort? How much is too much? What is too much? M asking so bcoz everytime a woman has a prob she is adviced to give it a try once again ; give a sec chance... n life goes on like this. Only physical harassment is not the only thing. Mental torture also exists.

I would say the last resort for anyone, man or woman, is when they are no longer able to talk to their partner about their feelings. The moment when that communication is lost between a couple and they are not able to trust their partner, is when the marriage has no hope left. Trust is the biggest determining factor. Every partner should be able to trust their partner. If they cannot, it's better to leave.

Quote

rajkona

@rajkona

Navigator

Posted: 11 years ago

#14

Great post! True, separation is not the only answer. I'm not married, but if I were, it would only be a last resort for me. Which marriage doesn't have arguments?

Quote

Janaki

@RamKiSeeta

Achiever

+ 6

Posted: 11 years ago

#15

Originally posted by: nb.neha

be it a show or real life our society has different rules for men n eomen. These rules have been mentioned by u indirectly. Yes ishita's in laws apologised to her. So she should feel good. My question is if someone is wrong n they apologise what is the big deal here? If ishita was wrong n if she had apologised nobody would ever think look how nice she is that she apologised. Why? Bcoz here its her duty. If raman or her in laws apologise then it's not their duty so one needs to feel grateful to them. Same is the case in the real world.

Another thing mentioned by u is the presidentship. Raman sacrificed it for ishita. Yes no husband does that. True. Even the wife makes lot of sacrifices for her family n for her husband. Wife's sacrifices will never be highlighted the way a man's sacrifices are highlighted.

Why different reactions, diff treatments, diff expectations from the same situation?

Again, I don't think we can generalize this to everyone because every family is different. I totally agree that what you wrote is the case for many women, but there are also many women who are treated extremely well by their in-laws, encouraged to be independent, and are recognized for their sacrifices. There are also women whose family supports them if they say enough is enough. Not every woman is told to give a second chance to an abusive husband. I know divorced women in India whose families were totally supportive of their decision. Who cares what society says if one's family is supportive? So my point is, every family is different. We cannot generalize a problem to every person living in India, just like we do not generalize certain issues with other countries to everyone living there.

In terms of abusive relationships, I think not only women, even men are treated unfairly. We know women who are abused in relationships. How many people know abused men who spoke out? Some people don't even believe men can be abused, which is totally wrong. Not ever man is an abuser, and not ever woman is a victim. Women can also be abusers, men can also be victims, but the problem with our society is that it encourages a woman to speak out, but it does not encourage a man to report abuse at all. Such men are laughed at and ridiculed for not "being a man". There is definitely gender inequality in the treatment of men also when it comes to abuse. In colleges for example, a man who slaps a woman is punished with harassment, but when a woman slaps a man she is applauded. Even if the woman is the harasser or abuser, it is the man who is punished if he tries to protect himself. All gender inequality must be removed, which is easier said than done.