Blast from the Past Thread #26 ** Talk to me ** P 132, Ep 299 - Page 111

Originally posted by: Horizon

Bhavii,

I agree to an extent, although I see Anjali more as ziddi , stubborn, than as weak, If she really wants to do some thing she can.. how she was introduced to us initially. She would bring back Khushi knowing well her brother absolutely cant bear her sight, and even balckmailed Khushi with that 3 lakh contract, She does lover her bro and care for Kh, but did it nevertheless becos she thought it was the right thing to do.
She wouldn't really mind expressing her deepest displeasure at asr- KH sudden wedding. Why I am saying is, she wants to take things the way she LIKES than the the way they ARE...
asr'sis almost a fatherly protectiveness for her.. if she wanted to see what Shyam is.. she would have.. she just wants to be in denial.. enjoyed that..

The lady is spoilt by her brother and every one at home making her ziddi and what not. She was Arnav's weakness and no one in the house went against her making her ziddi and mostly the weak people are more stubborn to hide their weakness.

Was interrupted while typing this, came back to edit.

Agree, asr should have investigated, not just when khushi told him but much earlier to that when shaym told him he didn't love rani sahiba at all. ASR had all the time, money, resources in the world to investigate what all shyam had been doing last few months, years between their hate wedding to Laxmi nagar terrace revelation, he didn't do... he just married her brought her home.. and did nothing...I didn't like that either.. unlike what he did for Sheetal over night later on.
In between the two siblings, where as anjali unfortunately came across as very self absorbed for NOT considering their claim that her husband was her brother's abductor, he was being sacrificial in sacrificing his love for his sister's sake.. he came close to loosing Khushi twice becos of anjali / or her marraige, where as she had complained her brother to be swaying in his marital bliss . i see them poles apart...
and, Anjali needed a full blown proofs to know about her husband . he didn't need any...

But yes, both siblings are stubborn in general.. a royal air in that...

Originally posted by: sohara

episode-292

Arnav gets Shyam out of the house by grabbing his collar. There is a befuddled expression suffuses in Anjali's eyes and she gives her last look at Shaym. The whole family is perplexed, what's happening!

After shutting the door, Arnav begs sorry to Anjali, he knows she is hurt, but he trusts Khushi. He is confident that what Khushi is saying is true.

Anjali totters in her place and finally faints. Arnav runs to catch her and so as the rest of the family.

Anjali's sense comes back in her room. The family enceindres her with tension. Arnav goes close to her, but she looks decadent and wretched, but her inside is convulsing in excruciating pain. Arnav and Khushi both look at each other with bafflement.

Mami tells Anjali to take rest, as the doctor said so. Anjali looks at Arnav with acute pain in her eyes, as if silently asking why you got my husband out of my life without my permission! Arnav's gaze falters ruefully; he wants to talk to Anjali. But nani wants to talk to Arnav first. Whatever happened, because of that there is a question raised in her mind. And she needs the answer from him. Arnav says in constrict voice that he will give the answers of all her questions, but before that he wants to talk to his di.

All goes out and Arnav sits on the bed beside Anajli. Before leaving the room Arnav gives Khushi an assuring nod, as if he is saying her not to worry, he will fix every thing. that's what I missed in his eyes when Shyam was humiliating Khushi.

"di you have to trust me. I could not see you in pain any more. I had to think of you and your unborn baby. di, till today, in every raksha bandhan, I promised to protect you. And today is the time to fulfill all of those promises; that's why I didn't have any other option left but to throw Shyam out from the house. I'm sorry di."

Arnav is in contrition for hurting his beloved did so much. He lies down on her lap, tries to give her some comfort. But Anjali seems just petrified in incisive pain that she even doesn't respond to his words. loved that underlined expression... turned to stone she did seem and in pain cutting into her.

Khushi who was standing outside, beside the door, breaks down completely to see the siblings sinking in an abyss of pain. Her heart slams painfully against her ribcage. She slides down to the floor, must be cursing herself, as she thinks she is reprehensible.

the floodgates opens and Anjali ebbs in the sweet memories of hers with Shyam. How he used to lift her in his arm, fed her, embraced her by saying that her place is in his heart. He brought the cradle for their unborn baby so lovingly. So many memories envelope her mind, how can she forget those!

Nani and mami also are in inexplicable grief. Both are crying remembering Shyam, his social niceties, his cordial behavior, and reverence to elders. He likes almond kheer, what nani used to make for him. Shyam used to give mami gifts and respected her a lot. They just can't believe that such a sweet person can be so vicious or they can't accept the fact that shaym is actually an evil person.

But they shouldn't have any doubt, after how he humiliated khushi in front of the family. No gentle man can behave so heinously with a woman even if she is bad.

Akash is also sitting with a grumpy mood. He is so exasperated on Payal that he doesn't even talk to her.

I can't blame Akash completely as Payal hid such a big thing from him. But how he continued the mental torture on Payal and blamed Khushi was annoying. the whole payal akash thing had so much potential but the writer on this track was inordinately weak, maybe there were many writers and no real direction.

NK espies everybody, the whole house is mourning, the whole ambiance is melancholic and he feels a tug in his heart.

Khushi is till outside Anjali's room, looking derelict. She is crying for the unfortunate thing what just happened because of her.

I felt a pang of pain for this young orphan girl. She has been bearing so much! She just came from near death, but nobody was even asking her or even thanked her for rescuing Arnav from the kidnappers. Arnav should take her to the doctor first, as she had a head injury. I was thinking as Barun was not available for some more days, why they didn't take Khushi to hospital to procrastinate the time!

Inside the room Anjali is recollecting how everything has changed in a moment. Khushi's accusation against Shyam, what Payal just revealed about his engagement with Khushi and next moment Arnav's slap. Silent tears are rolling down from her eyes in excruciating pain. Arnav is holding her hand, lying down on her lap. But anjali is stagnant as if God bereaved her completely. Arnav gets up to see tear in her eyes.

"I want to stay alone, please leave me alone." Anjali says without emotions. Arnav can't understand what to do. and Anjali repeats again,

"Arnav, just leave me alone."

Arnav perturbs to hear his name from Anjali's mouth. She never calls him by his name, always calls him chottey adoringly. In Bengali it says adorer daak.

She stands up and gets Arnav out from the room by holding his hand. Arnav is pleading her not to separate him from her, she has to listen to him, and she just can't do this.

Khushi stands up in embroilment. Akash, mami, Payal, NK, Akash, nani all gathers in front of Anjali's room again. But Anjali is incorrigible and says, she just wants to stay alone. She is not even looking in anybody's eyes. She shuts the door. All start to bang on her closed door.

"Please leave me alone." Anjali cries out.

mami says Anjali bitiya, but no avail, cause Anjali is impervious, she just says, "hume kaha naa, i want nobody. I just want to stay alone."

All prefers to leave her alone. While leaving, nani's look goes to Khushi's crestfallen face. She goes to caresses her. But mami seems harbored so much acrimony against her that she doesn't even want nani to love her.

I wish if mami had a daughter, then she couldn't be so harsh to an innocent girl!

Akash is livid; Payal pleads him to listen to her,

"You have to trust me and Khushi, cause we are telling the truth."

Akash asks her why she didn't tell it before. Payal wants to say, the reason. But Akash is not ready to hear anything,

"Such a big thing, and you didn't tell me"

He leaves with anger.

Payal leaves her thought to pacify her indignant husband, but she just can't evade her thought to support her sister, when she is in pain and anguish; she hugs her with so much love.

I really loved seeing this sisterly bonding growing again. After her marriage it was just lost.

Poor NK just watching everything with heavy heart.

Anjali stands in front of shyam and her portrait, she is crying with enormous pain. she can't accept why all of a sudden her perfect world became so complicated and painful!,

"I can't live without you. rehe nahi payenge apke bina" her voice constricts with so much tears that she even can't utter words from her mouth. She feels completely mortified as her and Shyam's life have taken divergent path.

Anjali is still in denial that Shyam actually deceived her.

By hugging Payal, Khushi tells her that she can't see Arnav and Anjali like this. She can't see them in such state. Copious tears are rolling down from her eyes..

Arnav finally enters in his room, still in his dirty clothes.

Go man, first take shower then think.😆 but he looks so gorgeous in this scene... uff.

He is in compunction. he mutters,

"I hurt di so much! I never wanted her to suffer like this. But it was important to bring this truth to everybody. But I can't see her in this state. I just can't see her like this"

The sad music in the bg makes the air more gloomy.

Oh my man, he pretends to the world that he is heartless, but his heart is just soft and tender like a baby. Oh my bachcha come to me, I'll love you more than Khushi. hello sauten of kkgsr, how goes 😆 arnav has the deepest sweetest strongest and most vulnerable heart as far as i am concerned. so ipk... the dimaag man is really the heart dil man.

Khushi has changed in her pristine white night suit. Clad in white she is looking opalescent. While wiping her hair, her look goes to Arnav, who is standing outside facing the pool. Khushi recollects the horrible event that occurred today, especially Arnav's slap on Shyam for humiliating her. She dithers, recalling Arnav said he trusts her. her heart suffuses with gratitude.

HP brings coffee for Arnav. Khushi takes the tray from his hand and saunters slowly towards the pool. Walking towards the pool, she struggles to shake off a vague disquietude in her heart, which almost felt like guilt. Her hands are quavering in agitation and her heart is thumping to intrude his sanctuary, as she knows very well that he is vulnerable now. A sudden wave of despondency and hesitation hits her, washing away all her courage and energy. Arnav turns back sensing her coming. An uneasy, feelings crackles between them. She keeps the tray on the end table and turns to leave without saying anything. Arnav holds her hand to make her stop. She turns towards him slowly and comes closer with tiny steps. Rabba ve in piano plays in the BG to depict their turbulent mind. Arnav gazes down at her tenderly. There is a soft glow glimmers in his eyes. He keeps his hand on her arm and she just can't control herself any more, crushes on his chest with myriad emotions. She clutches him tight and tears escape from her eyes and rolls down her cheek leaving long shiny tracks in their wake. She cries with all her pent up misery finally finding a release. Arnav also muffles her trembling body in his arms, caressing lovingly. He holds her back with one hand and her head with another. He can feel her pain, her anguish, her turbulence. The reassuring strength of his encircling arms, makes her even more emotional.

"kiyu khwabo mei tere saye " the sad Rabba ve plays in the BG makes the moment more surreal.

Khushi lifts her head from his chest and looks at his caramel pools. Genuine trepidation is flashy from the hazel of her eyes. He also looks at her with eyes swirling with emotions too deep for her. He fondles her beautiful face and caresses her tendril gently as he is so longed to touch her like this. As an intense protective tenderness rushes through his heart, he lifts the fragile doll in his strong arms and strides towards the room. He knows she must be weak and tired after a strenuous vulnerable day. Khushi snakes her arm around his neck, tries to seek comfort in his nearness. Both just stare at each other with eyes full of emotion and myriad love.

Again I am repeating, how perfectly she fits in his arm, as if made for each other. Never saw such perfect looking couple in my life. May be that's why I still can't accept them with any body else. you are so right. they are just so good together... and certainly sanaya's acting is the sparkling when she is bwith barun... tere is jaan in it, not just role. for me, they are the best jodi i have ever seen, even with all the problems of intimacy, etc.

Arnav crosses the threshold of the room carefully and even more carefully he puts her down on the bed as if the porcelain doll will break in mere carelessness.

After putting her down and covering her up with the comforter, he stands up to go back by the pool. He is tired, but his mind is so disturbed that the sleep eluded from his eyes, even after spending horrible two weeks in the hostage.

But Khushi holds his hand to stop him. She also needs him badly by her side. She knows how she spent the last fifteen days, when he left her in the crux of the moment of a terrible misunderstanding.

Khushi clutches his hand and pulls him towards her. He sits down beside her and again caresses her beautiful face and her errant tendril lovingly. He rests his palm on her creamy candent cheek and she holds it with her slender hand. His gentle touch comforts her so much that all her woes relegate to oblivion and drifts her into somnolence,

pause: I also wished if he would've lied down with her, snuggled close to each other. I'm not telling that he had to make love to her where he is terribly upset with his di, but it would be great if he would've spent some time with Khushi too. he was always so hard on himself. everyone had gotten used to depending on him... he had no place to just seek comfort, solace, if he needed... yes, di was there, but he did not like to burden her... and with khushi too, that taking charge thing in him kicked in. he really needed her to pull him down, insist he take a break or something... sohara, a place where arnav can just be himself, be weak too if he feels the need to be... how i wish that was what khushi came to be for him over time... he was always there for her... even when she had decided to leave him, even when she had done a paternity test. strong asr is, but even he needs and deserves a place of sukoon...

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGlt3JByMtI[/YOUTUBE]

credit goes to Sheena

gifs credit goes to tumblr

Originally posted by: aarwen

Episode 294

She was a little lost, worried about di, his health, everything else happening in the house. Even when repeatedly they came in each other's way she did not catch on the hint of a smile appear on his face. Then her eyes found his and she realized he was blocking her way deliberately.

The wind had found a reason to blow happily. The poolside was a joyful witness of her first playful interaction with her husband, after they have been through hell and back together, after he declared he believed her, after a night of torture seeing di in agony and being forced to let her bear it alone.

No, he is not angry with you, and surely when you are in front of him how can he not smile in wonder and that inherent naughty raizadaness that we go completely crazy over. As long as your are with him, every pain is bearable, there is strength and joy in your presence in his life. that was the nub of it as you point out beautifully. and isn't it astonishing how the man with the harsh gaze, inert almost at a level, who never missed a chance to show his indifference or ire or power over her actually segued smoothly to this revelation convincingly? without his own core character falling apart. i mean he is standing by a little dinky pool, doing this almost college boy stuff with his wife and it's clear, seeing her happy is key to his sense of wellbeing and feeling centred... yet, in no way is the image of the brusque wealthy deal maker tycoon damaged. this bit just rises and adds on to that portrait making it even more maddeningly attractive. fantastic, i thought that was in the delineation of the raizada man.

ASR let love come and claim him today. He allowed his heart to feel happy. The sight of her safe and sound, taking care of him, in his room, is enough to give him a moment of respite. And he lets it come to him.

Most probably this lightness, his attention, was least expected by her. It is almost like how Khushi Kumari Gupta would deal with a problem... making jilebis was her way.. Flirting with his wife, is his way.

The smile does return on her face, which he claims is what he wants, but Mr Raizada, in case you did not notice, the smile returned on your face as well.

He gauges her reaction, a playful amused smirk on his lips. His dear jhalli girl, all grown up serious one minute and then transitioning back to the coy, inexperienced, in love, new wife. Flustered because of him, unsure of how to deal with a playful husband. "Wow Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh raizada ko sharmana bhi aata hai.." .. A husky pride in his low tone, that he gets to make her shy.. She is his.. he knows it. And revels in it.

The talkative girl has no words.. But jab tum chup hoti ho tumhari aakhen bolti hai Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada. He moves towards her.. Wonder what he wanted to do? From habit, a dance step that is well practiced by now, she falls in sync, stepping back. Unsettled. You can almost feel the breath leave her in nervous anticipation.

Only this time he does not want her to move back or move away from him. It's high time she stopped going back. She should move forward with him... together. No mincing of words.. No flowery words.. In short simple sentences ASR speaks of what he is ready for.. He is ready to face the future.. with his wife by his side. ha ha he never was good with flowery, that was shyam's forte.

And though she says not one word, her lowered eyes and shy smile tell him all he needs to know. That she is as thrilled as him, and ready to be right next to him, in this wondrous journey of life.

I cheered loudly the first two minutes of 294. And as he blocked her way one last time I declared to myself everyone needs a little teasing and flirting to brighten up their lives.

Wish the lightness had prevailed and persisted for the remaining minutes of the episode. The rest left me disturbed and upset and for once even the suave Mr Sobti could not save it.

On Anjali's anniversary many many episodes ago a fresh young girl had spoken about what a marriage truly meant. She was just a stranger, on contract to serve sweets in the function, yet her words were not interfering, but beautiful and heart warming. Today however the well intentioned caring Khushi came across as a bit preachy to me. She meant no harm, only the very best for her di, but still maybe it was the timing. It irked me. i disliked that whole rushing to anjali's room and giving advice thing. once upon a time, even with all her impulsiveness, khushi was a sensible thinking girl... now she is an achchi bahu... an object. and objects do not think. their words are not their own. they mouth woolly nonsense that they think sounds good. i am afraid khushi is leaving us rapidly and 294 was such a missive of that.

ASR is pragmatic enough to realize di might not want to go to the doctor with him. And without much ado the younger brother steps up to take the responsibility of di. Quite often one doesn't need to talk much with someone you are comfortable around.

Then started the panic of the missing di. Nani was again a little off character, atleast to me it felt that way. Perhaps, her worry for her granddaughter made her lose control. And mamiji was unforgivable and rude towards the Gupta sisters. Though grudgingly, I have to admit she did have a point. It might have helped Anjali more if Khushi had brought mamiji to take care of her.

There was one split second which was profound.. Khushi wants to accompany Arnavji.. And nani stops her.. ASR consoles her with his hand on her shoulder. A subtle but powerful gesture. He is a man of action. No point in arguing and hurting nani in the present state, he knows his wife is sensible enough to stay back, but he also knows it must hurt her. And so in that gesture I saw him support her. Tell her he understood, but he needed her to stay calm and be strong.

Another lady was anything but strong, however. Anjali's decision to kill her unborn child, the very child she has longed to hold in her arms, is not just a symptom of bad writing, but a result of decades of women all over forgetting to live for themselves. We love with all our heart, work with all sincerity, and in the midst of this we tend to forget ourselves. Our worth as individuals is what that gets lost. Sure it is extreme in Anjali, who was brittle from inside. And sure this course of story was uncalled for. Still she has needed validation of her worth in the adoration she thought she received from her husband. And the very things and the very life that was precious to her lost its meaning when she thought she was alone. She was no one alone, and that is the most heart breaking tragedy. i agree with you so much about how we see ourselves. could it also be because a whole culture views us as things? i believe there is some sort of hue and cry in the desh about who can marry "our women"? our women? what, we are someone's property, are we? anjali was in a bad place. there were many ways the writer could have gone with her reaction to extremely difficult stimulus... but that choosing of abortion and then finally killing her child, had to be a man who has no feelings for and really deep inside, no respect for, women that wrote it. he also helped us lose khushi. pity is though, there was a woman heading this project, who proudly called ipk her baby. sad and at one level reprehensible the handling of women and their options in a show as intelligently written otherwise as ipk. somehow it marred the experience very badly for me. i still wonder at times what would have been the tale if khushi were to remain who she was when we met her first or anjali the girl she had seemed to be... flawed, maybe even a bit blind in love but with a stubborn strength in her, even a sense of entitement, that would help her fight this whole thing, find back her life.

The writers could have shown ASR's di a strong woman. Somehow that would have felt more in character with the smiling sophisticated smart woman we met in the beginning of IPK. The woman ASR had called on stage, full of pride and love. But both the children of Ratna Mallik had suffered scars from their parents death. For one it was visible, he wore it almost like a talisman, it propelled him to achieve, to fight for survival. The other hid it behind shrouds of belief in the almighty and goodness of people around her. For the brother, the more people tried to break him, the more he took charge of life refusing to give up. But the sister, she broke down and lost herself when faced with the unthinkable.

By the way, a trivia, and thanks to google I checked this, in Indian law a wife does not need consent from her husband if she decides on an abortion. yeah, make it as easy as possible, because so many girl foetuses to get rid of, what if the man is not available for whatever reasons to give consent. infuriates me... our messed up idea of law and running behind words like equality so we never ever realise how loaded the die is against a whole gender.

Originally posted by: indi52

episode 295

haan, hua hai

yeh sab tumhari vajah se hua hai

jab se tum aai ho tabse...

tum meri zindagi mein ayi hi kyun

main tumse mila hi kyun

sab kuch kitna achha tha

aur sabse important baat

di khush thi

sab tumhari galati hai, khushi

kyunki agar tum nahin aati toh shyam aisi harkat nahin karta

yes, it's happened

everything has happened because of you

from the time you've come, since then...

why did you have to come into my life

why did i have to meet you

everything was so good

and the most important thing

di was happy

everything is your fault, khushi

because if you hadn't come, shyam wouldn't have done what he did


episode 295 has some of my favourite moments of ipk... essentially the vicious tirade by asr, that taking out all his frustrations on khushi. frustrations is a weak word here. today what he saw, he possibly had never ever thought he'd have to. and it absolutely shook him up.

di stood there with a strange instrument, a pair of suture scissors or whatever they are called. he stared blankly at her through the blinds covering the glass door. he had been searching for her frantically. now she was here, but what was she doing with that... his eyes moved down, he saw the tray full of surgical steel and suddenly it dawned on him what exactly he was looking at.

before my eyes, a fabulous actor gave everything he had in him i felt, to make a fairly badly conceived moment work. give it meaning, the right feelings... taking it all the way to something that felt real, plausible. and not melodramatic, which was some feat of acting and direction, given that the basic premise spelt melodrama with a very loud bold capital m.

he looked young, vulnerable, helpless, scared, and at the same time determined to set things right. had he felt like that and looked like that on a night many years ago? the youngest member of his family, yet always the one to take on the mantle of the elder, the one who would keep things together, make it all work.

even his beautiful mother had finally cracked under pressure... but arnav singh raizada was not going to... he wouldn't let himself. i felt terrible watching the scene where a younger brother, someone with no experience of pregnancies, children, prenatal angst, nothing, watching his absolutely beloved sister all set to stab her womb with a lethal instrument and kill her baby. he must have instinctively worried for his di... worried that she might have died... and she might have.

he raged at those who tried to touch her and calm her down, little caring they were medical staff. di was his concern... when she was in this state, only he was allowed to hold her, persuade her, love her... love her like only he loved her. "di main,"di main," he almost whimpered as she screamed and showed her anger at last... she was going to take it out on her child. who would love such a child, a child whose father was not respected by anyone in her family.

on the one hand, anjali's warped thinking left me speechless on the other the fabulous emoting of a brother who loved to much, who cared even more and who just wanted to see his sister safe. he tried to tell her, he was there for her, for her baby, but she jerked away, a violence in her which took him aback, shocked him, maybe even frightened him.

instinct is a funny thing.

two thoughts about anjali.

she chose the man she knew in her gut to be more true, more strong and capable of setting things right. she chose chhotey... not yeh bhi na.

later in her room she almost became his child and asked him like an offspring of a father: make everything alright... you always make everything alright, because you can.

humey kya ho gaya hai, hum dono ko kya ho gaya hai?
what's happened to me, what's happened to the two of us?

sab kuch pehle jaise theek kar do...
make everything the same as before...

tum toh hamesha sab theek kar dete ho.
you make everything alright always.

di... calm down.

chhotey agar tum chahogey na toh sab kuch theek ho sakta hai.
chhotey, if you want, everything can be ok.

there too i could have wept for the young man... strong, honest, loving, kind, who wished he could set her world right again, he'd have done it if he could and ironically it's his folly that on another dark night he had actually believed that he could and had hurt the woman he loved like no other to do just that... somewhere tonight again, the same girl would get it.

but before that, the second point about anjali. while i think it is terrible that such a thing should have been written and believe the writer really did not get women, nor resopected a woman as an individual... still, if i am to assume that is what anjali did... and let's face it, in life people often do pretty bizarre stuff... then in a way i can only connect it back to a temperament picked up at home and a way of dealing with problems which she may have learnt at home too. their mother's suicide was always a bit hard to take for me. if indeed she is the loving kind woman we get hints of, would she have killed herself upon discovering her husband was with another woman at their home on the night of her only daughter, her firstborn's, wedding? so impulsive that behaviour and so thoughtless. if she did indeed do that, and that's what the story held till the end, then this extreme response... a complete breaking in the face of reality... alas was anjali repeating something she had seen before, responding like her mother when faced with ugly reality? otherwise where or how does such a thought even enter the head? she actually went to a doctor and discussed abortion? khushi was interfering, irritating, sanctimonious, but really what she'd said in no way could have provoked that response, unless you were already prone to such overly emotional and destructive behaviour.

kiski wajah se... kisski nazar lag gayi hai
why... because of whom...

anjali implied there was some reason their world was falling apart. as would become her biggest defence i guess, she'd look resolutely away from the truth and blame the stars, nazars, influences, forces negative for all her unhappiness... in her eyes shyam ji had to remain pristine. if that was the tack writers had decided on, i wish they had worked on it well and built a case for anjali's chaotic behaviour instead of never ever developing the theme well, just portraying her as an idiotic waffler. there was a lot of scope for compelling storytelling here i feel, but then i am not the writer of aserial, i don't work on five shows at once, i don't have the pressures these writers had... and yet, i somehow can't help thinking i may have a point here.

i'm really... i 'm really sorry di.

sometimes i cannot believe an actor of this calibre is not required by our television or films and is just away from all screens for nearly two years.

asr was not in the best frame of mind when mami came knocking. and well, one thing led to another and mami was only to happy to let arnav bitwa know it was all phatee sarees's fault. the moment her name was mentioned, his face went alert and of course when he was told khsuhi had actually gone to his sister's room, anger leapt and danced in the all too expressive eyes.

he walked angrily out of his room, something loping, animal in his stance. he found her, caught her arm and yanked her along with him reminding me of all those times he had done it before. this slightly out of control, violent almost way in which he'd drag her, force her to go with him, from that very first meeting... an unkindness in it really and yet today i feel a vulnerability there. as i had the night of the temple. she has no idea of her power over him. and she is somehow today so much a part of his idenetity. the very thought that she, she of all people, might have in any way been responsible for what he saw happening with di today, is almost like he somewhere were responsible.

he was very angry. he wanted answers. and when he hurled her into their room, locked the door and brought her out to the poolside there was still some semblence of control. he was in a bad state, i should have known that control wouldn't last long, this evening was going toward senseless flying vindictive rage... pressure cooker bursting... a dam collapsing and lashing out at all in its path, unmindful of what it destroyed, pent up crazy feelings blasting through a tiny little crack. and the one to face the music had to be the one for whom your breath races, pelts, the one for whom you forget all inhibition and dance. c'est la vie.

the writer knew though, as he often did when it came to asr's responses.

jab sabne tumhe mana kiya tha toh kya zaroorat thi di ke kamre mein jaane ki?
when everyone had asked you not to, then what was the need to go to di's room?

humne toh sirf...
i had only...

to hell with your sirf!
to hell with your only!

he is angry upset but still within control...

unhe lagta hai yeh sab tumhari vajah se hua hai...
they think it's all happened because of you...

she'd been told explicitly not to... he was beginning to push her for an answer, but was he really pausing to hear one... all his feelings seemed to be coagulating, becoming a choking mass, cutting off thinking.

tum phirbhi unse milne chali gayi? why dammit?
you still went to meet her? why dammit?

hume maaf kar dijiye...
forgive me...

she was taken aback... she really had not meant any harm and she apologised because she knew even though she had not meant it to, great harm had come off her action.

tumhare maafi maangne se kuch change nahin hoga!
your apologising won't change a thing!

and then perhaps from him come the words which is the crux of the problem:

tum soch bhi nahin sakti khushi ki maine aaj di ko kis halat mein dekha hai... sirf main janta hoon what i had to do to stop her.
you can't even imagine, khushi, in what condition i saw di today... only i know what i had to do to stop her.

he was so angry, had he been a little less so, would she have taken him in her arms? soothed him? felt his terror? who is there to make you smile, make you feel better arnav singh... those who always take charge i guess pay this price... people forget they are human too, and vulnerable... not always strong.

agar main sirf ek minute late pahuch ta na, toh...
if i were late by even one minute...

he rounds on her again, what was it that you said that she was forced to do this?

khushi starts to answer... perhaps to tell him she had said nothing that could have triggered this.

but he is not listening, he badgers her with the next question

kya zaroorat thi unke paas jaane ki?
what was the need to go to her?

at last khushi gets a chance to say something. kyunki hum bhi di ki utni parwah karte hain jitni aap karte hain... because i too care for her well being as much as you do. okay, that sounds reasonable. but the next sentence: hum bhi di se utna hi pyaar karte hain jitna aap karte hain... i too love di as much as you love her. sorry, khushi, not okay. bad writing... achhi bahufication attack. this unreal stuff, so not needed. that dialogue was the only thing that did not fit this astoundingly real and in its own way beautiful moment of loving.

hume bhi bura lag raha hai ki yeh sab hamari vajah se hua hai...
i also feel bad that all this happened because of me...

she says that and a demon unleashes in him... all the anger all the helplessness the fear terror everything crashes and congeals and a terrible ugly gussa releases... he lets off steam in the most destructive way imaginable... turning on the one he loves the most... the very thought of her in any way being involved with his di's state increasing that anger...

haan, hua hai...

she looks up, sensing a change.

yeh sab tumhari vajah se hua hai...

his voice rises wildly, echoing. something primal in it. the storm that must come before calm can return.

jab se tum aai ho tabse...

he turns away from her, another classic asr posture... and lets it rip... vulnerability turning to ugly vicious anger. she looks on shocked. an unbelievable moment... but here it is.

tum meri zindagi mein ayi hi kyun... main tumse mila hi kyun... sab kuch kitna achha tha... aur sabse important baat... di khush thi.

yes, before khushi came into their life, he had worked almost single handedly to restore stability, unimaginably blighted by the suicide of his parents and the unconscionable usurping of all the property by his uncle.

bikhar gaya tha, those scattering pearls of episode two were always somewhere reminiscent of the scattering of two young people's lives one night, a night meant to be beautiful. and ever since then he'd done all he could to bring life together again, tie it back. he'd asked for no happiness for himself... just for di. he had not believed there could be happiness for him in this bedard world, he had put up his walls, strengthened his ramparts and sealed off all entrances to his heart. and tried to find harmony, meaning, everything, watching his sister being happy.

this happiness of di's was very very important. and now it's gone. he knows why it's gone, but tonight, rational thinking is not going to get much of a chance, emotions are in disarray.

sab tumhari galati hai, khushi...
it is all your fault, khushi...

(as i looked for a title for this take, a beautiful scene came back to me, he in brown suit, she in orange churidar, the morning of the wedding, he'd walked toward her smiling, smitten... so in love with her... and getting ready to tell her. she had sensed him, dakdhakked and floated along on the courtyard as he'd walked toward her on the verandah, parallel to each other, eyes on each other they'd taken those steps, smiling bemused, till the cow ate all her plates... sab aapki galti hai, she'd accused him immediately... it's all your fault. same words, and what a diffrent situation... yet, not really all that different.)

and then he says the words.

kyunki agar tum nahin aati toh shyam aisi harkat nahin karta.
because if you hadn't come, shyam would not have done what he did.

the unkindest words of all. cruel. unthinking, utterly erroneous and emphatically wrong. arnav singh raizada's temper again getting the better of him. unforgivable.

khushi looks up, everything in her falls apart i am sure at that instant. yes, it does.

silence... as the words are allowed to seep in and damage and damage some more. then.

di aaj bhi pehli ki tarah khush hoti
di would be happy today as she was before.

it's the biggest mistake in my life, khushi kumari gupta,
kash main tumse kabhi milahi nahin hota
it's the biggest mistake in my life, khushi kumari gupta,
wish i'd never met you.

khushi sits down by the pool, dazed, stricken, struggling to make some sense of it, hurting horribly and every word plays back.

he walks away and of course goes driving in the dark. the suv, alas now only from stock shots, his ultimate refuge.

and the thoughts roam in him. first the memories of di in that hospital, onto the recurring memory of her wedding and the gunshot. he remembers nani's words, mami's accusations about phatee saree.

and suddenly a completely different memory, he hears his own words... khushi, rona band karo... a beautiful call of the heart... khushi, i love you.

khushi runs and hugs him that very first time, and they are falling among packing cases holding each other, a boundless need, she is protecting him from a thorn, she is falling before his eyes as he struggles to free himself... he is trying to revive her.

a series of memories of the woman whose happiness is equally important to him as di's, maybe even more.

a girl without whom he can't live. and she's the one he has just said all those things to.

perhaps the screaming and the being vicious and the driving has eased his emotions a bit, for at last, there seems to be a return to sanity and his heart. love always finds a way to nudge its way in through everything, even when one is right to be angry. what is this hold over the heart an emotion has, always perplexes me, and amazes. and once it returns to the heart, it seems to almost magically drive the terrible thoughts, acusations, couner accusations, everything, away.

he of course stopped the car as he always does, this time remorse welling in him and an anguish.

dammit.

that one word seemed to say it all. barun sobti took that word to its moment and held it there... an instant became indelible.

i personally felt the voiceover: yeh maine kya kar diya... mujhe abhi ghar jaana hoga, was added later and was unnecessary. what i did like in terms of telling a story, though they were slightly obvious ploys, was the mirroring of actions. him carrying di as he always carries khushi. anjali holding his hand and stopping him from leaving her after he has laid her on the bed, exactly as khushi had. both needing him to be strong. they helped highlight the position of this character vis a vis the two women he loves and the tension that pervades. he can't live without either, nor can they be without him and yet slowly it is beginning to look like he will have to make a choice. i think his conscience made the choice it had to and he was a man of conscience very strong and abiding, but his heart always knew that now someone else has become the most important person in his life.

i love this fight... i am heartless.

pisode 295 from crooner 97 the fight
https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/113435476

Originally posted by: Horizon

Indi,

Compelling take. A powerful episode that was all about him, how he is torn between these two women the impossible choice for him to make. I did think he would have to make choice and Di would be that. but next few episodes did show his choice clearly being Khushi.
The hospital drama didn't sit with me too well. I am a director's viewer.. if the script is bad, overtly deliberately dramatic it wouldn't work for me inspite of commanding performances... a otherwise pious woman trying to abort her fetus and a brother panicking about her.I thought daljeet did very well too. In fact Barun and Daljeet had such great chemistry that almost all of anj- asr scenes worked tremendously well.

The pool side tirade and the remorse immediately what made asr such realistic character thankfully not mahaan.. but his sabse important baath Di khush thi.. sounded jaded to me.. they could have NOT used that sabse important baath.. perhaps their intention was to make him sound jaded.. the panic he had been through minutes ago that made him unaware of everything else.

aww the SUV... a thread is needed to pay tribute and condolences..
@purple, he is very much required by television, being away from it is his choice. one yes from him, I am sure a bee line will be present out side his door..it takes a while and luck to hit the right role and script in films

Originally posted by: indi52

episode 296

some things have a sense of intense familiarity. as though already recorded in your memory. you have been there before, the story in front of your eyes is overlapping with a story within you.

295 and 296 took me to that feeling. love's many faces, not always pretty, love's irrational injustice, love's sweet compelling call, love's supremacy... yes, as la had said, pyaar sabse bada hota hai... it has a hold and a healing in it, it sparks and ignites ultimately, passed all the tum yahan aayi hi kyun, main tum se mila hi kyun, it's the biggest mistake of my life, etc., ones very dhadkane.

filmi i may sound, but there is a power there that supercedes all. and in submiting to that... such perfect syncing with life. saansey.

everything he said when he left was wrong, especially the barb about shyam... unpardonable really.

yet, all of that was wrapped around that feeling that has come to stay in him.

and she was badly terribly hurt. shocked, insulted, anguished. for days everything had been in turmoil in their lives. but there had been the joy of finding each other. loving each other. trusting each other. now this.

i felt her heart break. i felt her intense agony.

and i felt his heart break too and his intense pain.

he had done wrong by saying what he did.

she was behaving not rationally by threatening to leave. she has told us about the sanctity of marriage so memorably. would she leave him because he said unpardonable things... or maybe his lashing out reminded her of the many others ever since the night of the terrace.

a marriage, though, is really forever, the way khushi read it and it is beyond forever the way asr loved her...

this was just the hell of living in reality and being human.

i often think of tagore's shapmochan when i see their dance of anguish.

in the court of indra, it seems, the court musician was in love with the dancer and lost his concentration. indra banished them to earth and said they would meet there again and give each other extreme pain, utter agony and yet love each other... in that will be their redemption...

jao mortey, shekhane dukha paabe, dukkha debe, shei... hobey prayashchitta.

snatches of the oft heard lines come back. i used to thrill to that story. he is born truly ugly but a prince and a great player of the veena. she is a beautiful girl, a princess i think... they have an arranged marriage where he sends only his veena, not a picture. he has fallen in love with her... when she sees him, there is rejection, terrible hurting... and yet in the end, everything resolves itself and love enters the heart... the redemption is done... shapmochan means the erasing of the curse.

even at seven, eight and nine i could feel the pure power of the tale. and perhaps it was a great allegory of life as it's lived where we often wonder about pain and why it is there at all. more importantly it's a delve into the nature of love.

hurt is resident in it i think.

awful egregious hurt even.

must go through fire to find its complete caratage, all 24 of it.

she sat packing her clothes, a tiny forlorn creature on the bed with a little bag. he burst into the room. he knew he had erred terribly. he knew this would not be easy to set right. asr's need for his lover, his woman, his pagal, his chamkili was written all over him and filled every space available.

but she, today passive in her aggression, had erected a cold inert space around her... she had hurt so much, her heart almost closed and it was with rational arguments, even though with tears flowing down her cheek, she blocked his entry into her world.

to his desperate what are you doing... to his pleading you can't go, i won't let you... she gave him such difficult to fight answers.

he was tired, he was drained, he said he had not meant to say those things... he looked so wan, and said, don't do this, not today.

khushi persisted. too badly stung to reconcile, to resolve the pain.

every time she insisted, he grew more desperate. when she said she couldn't bear to hurt anyone, especially him... a world of wretched sad loving passed between two sets of eyes.

sometimes things do get so bad... so quickly.

and no matter what you try... nothing returns to sanity.

arnav singh raizada has never pleaded with anyone to stay back. he has never really sought any joy for himself ever since he has seen his mother die and his own betray him. a dark wall closes around his heart. he wants happiness for his di... even his family. but himself?

but now a shining warm crazy girl with innocent eyes and passionate giving love who pours mango juice in his shoes has thawed the cold, leapt right in with light. in the abyss of an ocean she has spotted a pearl and released it. it shines, it refuses to let darkness gain momentum, it gleams...

and it makes him want to be happy. makes him want something for himself even. makes him want to live. this quiet sad girl with her black canvas bag, packing her stuff. he can't let her go.

main tumhare bina...

he starts saying what he knows to be true now... without you, i can't...

but she won't let him finish such sentences... that might be her undoing.

wonderful direction by arshad khan. a palpable, dense, tense, moment between lovers, both just saying i love you so much, in the middle of all the nasty words and i will leave you. somehow asr's need comes across more. khushi is doing to my mind what many women have done before in a patriarchal set up where women struggle in there own way, she's closed her emotions, toned down her feelings as much as possible and with her bruised dignity is "managing" this whole thing... mainly her agony, that bereft feeling within.

main tumhare bina...

she cuts in but my stomach has already felt his yielding crying need.

humse bardasht nahin hota, arnav ji
i can't bear it, arnav ji...

what is in those eyes of his. how much can a man need a woman.

ki hamari vajah se di taqleef mein hai...
that because of me di is in pain...

the eyes seem to change and say what! what about... and he says aloud the words.

aur main...
and me?

two little words... what about me... a man's need to be loved, to matter, to not be abandoned... not again. he has never asked for anything for himself... today and only with her, he does.

khushi has perhaps brought down the last of those walls. he can again want happiness and speak of his personal need. he doesn't have to be strong man, i can handle it all, he can be vulnerable... that is her gift to him almost.

i can never express the sheer beauty of this moment...

but khushi was too hurt to hear.

and at last, he had to turn to his old friend, his habitual response pattern, anger, to manage the moment.

the contract came up. she was even more hurt. shocked really. after all that they'd been through... how could he... yes, he is a beast indeed... no prince, he.

which again said to me, to khushi the marriage was real now and not a mere contract for six months. in which case, leaving home as first option after your husband has hurt you may not be the best one. but today everything is meant to go haywire... a day of emotions out of control and loving through hurting.

he took all the name calling, he pretended he didn't care, though he did turn away from her as he threatened dire things. and when she had left the room... words pored through him.

sorry mujhe yeh sab kehna pada khushi, lekin tumhe main kaise jaane de sakta hoon... sorry i had to do this, khushi, but how can i let you go...

oh the voice. that break in it, the stress on tumhe, the lost feeling.

but iss contract ke poora hone se pehle main tumhe wapas paa loonga... but before the end of the contract, i'll get you back. look at that acting.

later when she stood sad by the pool and spoke to the stars, he remembered of course that very first time she had told him about her conversation with the stars, healed him... tears seem not far away and both their minds go to the moment that tied them... for six months and for eternity. their wedding. the threats, the signs of lifelong commitment... mangalsutra, sindoor, not just anger and violence.

i am sorry, khushi, mujhe maaf kar do, maine tumhe itna dukh pahunchaya hai, but i will bring you back
tumhe wapas jeetke rahunga
aur apne zindagi ka hissa banoonga hamesha hamesha ke liye.

i am sorry, khushi, forgive me, i've hurt you so much, but i will bring you back, i will win you back and make you apart of my life forever and ever.

i am looking at a doer. a man who would make his destiny, if he has botched it, he will set it right. i have loved this essence of a man taking charge and responsibility of his own life in this character. he makes me ponder free will. why we have it... what are we to do with it... what is our say in our life, what is from somewhere else.

in the morning, the cutest of mistakes. in one simple sentence we know who has become really and truly important. when he finds khushi missing, instantly a fear, a worry... rushes around then walks into di's room and without thinking...

di, aapne khushi ko dekha kya?
di, have you seen khushi?

sabse important baat has a way of finding its way and coming to light.

just two things about the new chapter of khushi's birthday now opening. only ms irani can look so pretty and jhalli in that ghastly pink blue velvet monstrosity. and when he walked in, he was, for once, not looking his usual handsome self... a bit haggard, hair oily, skin dank. but the eyes burned. and i was happy to know, it was not just his good looks that got me. actually, he has been looking a little tired, face puffy since his return.

khushi is trying to be happy, and so, acting corny. she has told nothing to her family.

how dare you, khushi... man is here.

jab main tumse baat kar raha hoon toh meri taraf... when i'm talking to you then look at...

he was beginning to lose his cool again. disproportionate anger, uff i wish they had delved into this trait. why when where how of it.

buaji's revelation has him in shock. then she lands him in a mess: didn't bring a gift?

and again talk starts between two sets of eyes.
you didn't tell me...
why should i ? you hurt me so much.

but 296 was really about the need in a lonely, tough man, who can't do without the love of his life any more. and its most telling moment... aur main?

for months, a song has said asr to me... i didn't even get all the words, what they said or meant, but it was asr. i felt it land perfectly on the two words. made a vm, do take a look.

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGoNrnd_6g4&feature=youtu.be[/YOUTUBE]

mohit chauhan and priya panchal sing, rapping is by tanvi shah and dean sequiera. music is by sachin-jigar and bezubaan is written by mayur puri.

hai jo lahu mera, behta chala
my blood, it just kept flowing
dekho junoon mera, kehta chala
look at my madness (obsession), it kept saying
khaabon ka tha makaan jo dehta chala
it was a house of dreams that kept falling

bezubaan kab se main raha
i have been without a say (tongue) for so long
begunaah sehta main rahaa
innocent (without committing a sin) i've endured so long
bezubaan kab se main raha
i have been without a say (tongue) for so long
begunaah sehta main rahaa
innocent (without committing a sin) i've endured so long

no pains, no fear, no shouts, no beers
i wanna make my life peaceful and cheer
me, you, who wanna live here
so just let me breathe

bezubaan kab se main raha
i have been without a say (tongue) for so long
begunaah sehta main rahaa
innocent (without committing a sin) i've endured so long
bezubaan kab se main raha
i have been without a say (tongue) for so long
begunaah sehta main rahaa
innocent (without committing a sin) i've endured so long

khwab ka tere qissa hoon
i am a chapter in your dream
tera hi toh main hissa hoon
i am part of you really
mujhko na kar yun juda
don't make me separate from you

can anybody tell on me?
no! no!
you better not stop me
you better not flop me
from who i wanna be
it's my destiny
don't mr. stinner
here comes the winner
play on the bass up in the race

no pains, no fear, no shouts, no beers
i wanna make my life peaceful and cheer
me, you, who wanna live here
so just let me breathe

ka ka boom... ka ka boom... ka ka boom
ho...ya!

meri jagah teri nigaahon mein
my place is in your gaze
ho na ho main chala un raahon mein
there or not, i walk those paths
jo ladkhada gaya kahin
if i stumble somewhere
toh aaoge tum hi toh
then you're the one who'll come
thaamoge tum hi toh
you only shall hold me
phir berukhi... kyun hai mujhse
then why this indiffrence to me
kyun aise bhala ho mujhse khafa
why are you angry with me like this

bezubaan kab se main raha
i have been without a say (tongue) for so long
begunaah sehta main rahaa
innocent (without committing a sin) i've endured so long
bezubaan kab se main raha
i have been without a say (tongue) for so long
begunaah sehta main rahaa
innocent (without committing a sin) i've endured so long
...

i edited the song and the sequence varies.

Originally posted by: indi52

hi indu,

thanks.

yes, the abortion was bad writing... and i tried to see if there was anything i could see in it that might be interesting. actually, when i saw it the first time, because i had such a strong hope that ipk would return, i thought there might be some story to the whole abortion angle or whatever... it was all the way melodrama, looking for trp... losing story and character without compunction.

i found daljeet a little predictable. but barun was more the one i felt and responded to. i understood perfectly khushi's sadness, shock, anger... wish they had touched on that. though that threat of leaving home that to that very night from someone who had seemed deep and intelligent in the beginning and who had a most edifying view of marriage... i did not get.

anger and hurt makes us do many things. usually, not right, but often justifiable. i guess if the mahanta was dropped and khushi was shown to be normal, it would have appealed more.

about that di khush thi. yeah, sounded like an old story... though new realities are here in his life. my take: when you go through terrible events at a young age, there are certain things and people you hold onto that restore a sense of stability. di's khushi is all he has cared about till now... to la too he had said, as long as di is happy, that's all that matters.

he perhaps doesn't even know himself, how very important khushi has become to his sense of well being... how much her happiness matters.

yes, he loves her and knows that... but in this panic stricken state, some old, set responses. which is why, the realisation of khushi's significance, her centrality, i enjoyed much when his flashbacks suddenly veered and it was all khushi... his heart calling out... needing her, loving her...

i have gotten over terrible fights myself when i have felt that extra rational, supercede all, call from within.

i wish they had shown khushi's yearning for him just once... would have been perfect. if she could only feel, that yes, he has been terrible... but arnav ji is part of my life... no matter what. if she had once understood, even for di's false sense of khushi, i can't desert him... love is a complex binding thing... we saw asr's love... next season, maybe we'll see khushi's.

and let's do that suv thread, sir.