Romantic Fantasizing

Finally it has arrived - romantic love. The love that Tellywood and almost all of IF fan fictions promote as the only kind of love.

Romantic love is wonderful, easy, and so uncomplicated. It is what keeps IF alive and its members happy. The feelings and spontaneous awareness that goes through the hero and/or heroine that we are one; made for each other. You are perfect and will provide most or all of my wants, needs, and desires. I can give and receive love effortlessly.

The hero and heroine think about each other constantly, make much eye contact, and are very affectionate to one another. Passion and expression of romance come often. The hero/heroine is living in a state of near-bliss and infatuation. There is a feeling that "we will never disagree" and somehow fate or forces larger than themselves have brought them together.

On one hand, we have Veer whose subliminal feelings for Pakhi have bubbled forth and are tormenting his conscious mind. And on the other, we have Pakhi whose brain has been fed with feelings for Anshuman since childhood affirm herself to be the Dhola-Maroo heroine.

Veer is romantically fantasizing while Pakhi is living the illusion that been instilled in her since childhood!

IMO - both Veer and Pakhi are going through the stages of love in reverse order. By this I mean, normally romantic love is the first blush of love until reality sets in and they see the other close up with their personal habits and foibles. It is then that the couple learns how to deal with very real differences, how to deal with conflict, and how to integrate being an independent person as well as someone in an intimate relationship. Both and Veer and Pakhi dealt with reality first - learning about each other's strengths and shortcomings and learning to trust and work together as buddies.

In fact, Veer and Pakhi have gone beyoun reality and actually reached the final stage of love - which is acceptance. A high level of warmth is present between them. They know each other and know what to expect. They accept what they are getting from the other. They work together as a team to stay connected and also maintain their own identities. They support and balance each other. They know how to provide a healthy and fulfilling life to their kids.

But both of them had believed themselves to be martyr's in love. Veer lived in the illusion that he only loved Kiriti and Pakhi that she only loves Anshuman.

Now Veer is becoming aware of his romatic fantasizing while Pakhi is living in delusion. She is afraid to step out of the boundaries entrenched deep within her psyche since childhood.

Well, if the media are to be believed, Jiji is going to zap Pakhi out of her funk.

P,S. What is it with Lavanya? - When her mother (Anuja) was around she did not care two cents about Anshuman - now she wants Pakhi to stay true to her dead brother. That woman through out the serial has been flaky and shifty!!!

Honestly tho, I feel like there's needs to be more time shown, in order to show Pakhi believably falling in love with Veer. For Veer, I think its a bit simpler to fall in love, because its been years since he last saw/ heard from Kirti. First off, she got married and he decided to live alone. Then she's been dead for a couple of years. He's had time to grieve and move on. I don't think Pakhi has been given that same time. She's been strong for Ayan, strong for the Rathore Empire, strong for Anshuman as she wants to fulfill his dream. Personally, I'd like to see Pakhi finally deeply grieve for Anshuman and have a lot of time to reflect before she falls in love with Veer.

I don't think that Pakhi is necessarily living in illusion. At this point in time, it would be extremely unrealistic if they showed her falling for Veer. Pakhi had over 22(?) years to love Anshuman. She's only known Veer for what 6(?) months? Of course she'll think she can't fall in love with anyone but Anshuman for now. She'll come to the realization of love for Veer much later.

As for Lavanya, idk. I think part of the reason why she clung on to her mother and Aryaman so much, was that she was trying to compensate for Anshuman. Remember, Anshuman had been Lavanya's only constant family for a long, long time. For a long time, the two only had each other as their mother had left a long time ago and presumably their father wasn't one to show much emotion. When he left, the only "biological" immediate family, with whom she had any sort of childhood connect to, was Anuja. So obviously she was drawn to Anuja. She didn't want to lose Anuja, thus she agreed to subscribe to Anuja's ideas + plans. She didn't really care about Aryaman I think. But later on she realized that Girish was also her family and she made the conscious decision to let go of her childhood connect and focus on her present. I think at her core, she's a lot like Anshuman: needy and insecure. And those two traits drive many of her decisions (including the ridiculous ones).

As for Lavenya I understand that she wants to cling to her brother but I found it little difficult to understand her logic that Ansuman lives through Pakhi and Pakhi is keeping him alive. Surely Ansuman lives through Aayan more than Pakhi

And I also agree that she probably thinks the worst of him because she does not want to consider the best of him. But its working in his favour because he continually proves himself to be good.

As for Lavanya, although she irritates the hell out of me sometimes, I find her really interesting. She's clinging on to Pakhi because of that comment Jiji made, about Pakhi no longer being theirs. Pakhi was Lavanya's sister-in-law first. And now she's probably feeling like she's not only being kicked out of Pakhi's life, but also out of Anshuman's memories associated with Pakhi. Lavanya said that for the first time, her maternal home did not feel like home. Even after Anshuman's death, that home still felt like hers and had Anshuman's memories. But now, she's being kicked out and feeling insecure. Anshuman does live on in Ayan more than Pakhi, but Pakhi is the one who has chances of being pulled away from Lavanya's family (as Pakhi is married into another family now and not necessarily her bhabhi anymore either). So her insecurity is causing her to cling on to Pakhi. Idk, that's what I thought.

Thank you for sharing your views. Anasuya thank you for the beautiful CAP.

I am sorry I cannot reply individually because I am pressed for time.

I must say - I like the different perspective and the thoughts of all contribute to a better idea of what it is that Pakhi, Lavanya, and Veer are undergoing.

Personalities are complex and individual emotions have several shades - no one person can grasp it all, we can but try. So I thank you all for sharing your viewpoints

What does the phrase Dhola Maro mean please? Sorry my Hindi is not that good😳