hi i am new to writing thus this is my very first, please note that the writing in italics is the writing in the diary and it begin post the param track. and please like if you want a PM and comment if you deem worthy and now without further adew...
I came to this house as alone a mother for my darling Ruhi, but as I realized I am also a bahu to this house I happily accepted my role, but why then must I awake and cry, why did I have to be taken from this house in order for my own family and husband to realize that I was honest and bared no wrong intentions for Paramet, I accepted him and honored him as Bala jiju yet when I opened up to him he thought as I was asking for sexual attention. Simi, still holds a grudge although she doesn't say so I cam very well see the distaste in her eyes. Yes, Raman cleared my name and brought me back but did I truly break this house? Am I responsible for Simi's hurt? Did I break my own husbands home? Muragun please give me some answers.
I closed my eyes and tried to stop the tears that were falling, this whole day I couldn't shake away the emotions and questions that I have been trying to avoid for the past week since Raman brought me back home, I was able to avoid them as I was lost in work through the week but one can only do so much house work on a Sunday without attracting the families attention. the whole day I couldn't shake the thoughts away and now I think I finally got them out.
This diary, its always been with me since amma gave it, with me at every step the sorrows and joys. its my only companion it probably knows me better then I myself, its me all me.
the Tears weren't stopping and the thoughts weren't leaving.
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"ji Mr. Mital we will definitely try to make it to all the functions' answered Raman to yet another call for an entire wedding, why don't people call me to just the last function so I can say that I am busy for that day, how do you deny all the functions.
' Please do Raman we will await your arrival and please do bring your wife' '
'um Ya Sure, see you then'
Finally Raman thought I am home, aaj ka pora din was too busy, aur ab ye, he turned off the phone and headed for his room, to tell Ishita, they were probably just go to 2 functions max, can't take anymore.
As Raman entered he was welcomed by Ishits engrossed in a her Diary, this wasn't an odd site anymore, at first he was usually taken back that ye Jansi ke Rani was writing in a diary which is taken as an act to calm people not her, plus agar ye utna likte hai jitna bolte hai to ye novel like jaye.
Raman often saw this diary in her hands yet afterwards it is as though it disappears, never again to be seen, but today this diary of hers wasn't only encapturing her words but rather her tears also, for as she wrote tears dripped down, onto the pages and wove their way into the pages forever.
never before had I questioned her for what she wrote, but yet when he saw her now it was as a question which he desperatly wanted an answer, for surly the Param incident isn't bothering her, for he would have noticed in the past week. what was it whats bothering her?
Raman left the room and returned some time later, Ishita was now asleep and as expected the diary was nowhere to be seen. Raman made his way to bed and for hours tried to find rest but tonight it was as sleep had lost its appeal.
hours later as raman still attempted to sleep he was interuptted by an urgent mumur coming from the couch, Raman got up and made his way claiming ' ye Jansi ke Rani ko need me been shanti nahi, abhi bi lecture de ri hogi',
as Raman reached forward he heard her say, ' Don't touch me, Help , Raman , Amma!"
In a desperate attempt to help her, Raman reached out to awake, but as he touched her Ishita shoved Raman back fractically and awoke.
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tears were streaming down her eyes and as her eyes met Ramans, she recollected herself and made a desperate attempt to fix herself before him.
'Ra...Ra..Raman app'
Raman them got up and left the room
'what did I just do, what just happened' thought Ishita, Raman then returned with a glass of water, and offered it to her, after she drank it he again left with the empty glass. Ishita settled back into her blanket just as Raman returned.
Raman went to her and offered her a hand to which Ishita offered a confused look
'tum kuch asi hi nahi kar sakti,' Said Raman
Ishita then accepted his hand and was brought to bed and tucked in by Raman. though Ishita was trmendously confused she did not want to question him, for she was afraid she may be told of what occurred to which she rather leave alone.
Raman then left and slept on the couch, and for the rest of the night sleep did not make a permenant entery rather left her continously.
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Raman was tremendouly greatful for Ishitas lack of questions and restraint, for he was still in a void as to what he just witnessed.
Ishita called out for him and he was unable to help her, she called to him before her own amma, and he let her be humiliated before the family. he not only owed her an apology but had to make her come out of the trauma.
Raman too was left with thoughts then sleep for the remainder of the night.
PRECAP; "Raman gifta Ishita"
Part 2: http://www.india-forums.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=4092274&TPN=2
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