Tera Hi Bas Hona Chahoon SaHil OS

11 PM

"Uff Allah Miya peh gaya panga!" Sanam groaned as the bedsheet looked crooked despite her fixing it for the umpteenth time! Her Badi Ammi always said she had gone after her father... Prim, proper and a neat freak! Asad Ahmed Khan... If he had been alive he would have been one of the most important men in her life. She had heard all about him and her mother Zoya Farooqi from Badi Ammi. They say a father is the first man in a girl's life! From what she had heard, he was such a dignified and disciplined man. Such men are rare these days. Men tend to be brash, rude... Badtameez! Those words immediately flashed an image through her head and reminded her of the one person she wished would stop plaguing her thoughts as somehow everything she thought of came back to him! In a negative way of course! She could never think of the Jallad Jin in a loving way. Loving yuck! Her choice of words horrified Sanam. All the brainless girls in Bhopal might find him hot but unfortunately for the Nawab his wife was least interested! Wife! Sanam sighed and sat on his... No their bed! So much had changed so quickly! But one thing remained the same... The Jallad Jin! A few times she had hoped he would change as she found glimpses of a nice person within him but she was wrong! Insaniyat, mohabbat aur izzat jaise alfaazon ke saat unka koi rishta nahin hai. He may love his Ammi and sisters but beyond that he viewed women as different hobbies. Depending on his mood he would pick out a new one. The thought of him being her husband made her realize what a big mess she had gotten into. But as Asma said 'whatever happens... happens for the best'. Sanam got up and took one last glance at the bed. It still looked wrong... Just like her life and she could do nothing to fix it. It didn't matter anyway. Not that she would get any sleep. A bitter laugh escaped her throat. But the Jallad Jin... Oh boy he was gonna sleep like a baby! Without any worry on his mind! He never bothered about anyone's feelings anyway, especially hers! Not when she made him the cake, not when she was shivering from cold at night and not even when his loving ex finace insulted her! Sanam blinked back tears. Why did she care! If she doesn't matter to him why should she care... Sanam didnt know why but a part of her expected something... From him... She just didn't know why! It was like a false hope! He had saved her life twice but had never viewed her as equal! Every opportunity he found he put her down. Yet his glances and stares made her feel aware of herself... Of being a woman! A strange unsettling yet pleasing feeling sat in the pit of her stomach everytime he looked and would make her heart beat faster. Maybe she just didn't like the way he stares at her. Thats it! When Rehan looks at her things seem normal. The Jallad Jin just has a way of making her uncomfortable! His issue with wearing less clothes... Showing of his abs... Talking with a husky tone for no reason... Giving her burning looks with those intensely drowning eyes... Sanam gasped mortified at where her thoughts were taking her! She took a deep breath and wiped her face. She got up when she heard the door close! Great think of the devil and the devil appears. No wonder she cant sleep well at night! Not wanting to get into an argument she quickly went to her side of the bed and laid down facing away from him as he had instructed her. Not that she wanted to see his face anyway! The thought of him sleeping in the same vicinity as her was scary enough and she didn't need a reminder that he was on the same bed. Sanam sighed and closed her eyes trying to catch up on a week's worth of sleep.

When Aahil walked into the room he had seen Sanam in deep thought. Recalling her words about how her life was completely destroyed because of him and his birthday, he was sure she was thinking back to her good days and what her life had become now. He had seen her laughing and enjoying as girls her age do with Rehan. Around him she was always angry and scornful. His heart ached a little thinking of the happiness that he was depriving her of. She could have lived the perfect life without him. He was truly a devil! He had sucked her into his scarred life and made sure every ounce of happiness was gone from her life. Aahil felt a sting in his eye as tears threatened to appear and guilt inside his heart to make it worse. He tried to ignore it. But then his Ammi's words rang his hears defeaning all other thoughts. She had married him for money only. She could have had the perfect life with Rehan but she choose him... No his money, Aahil thought bitterly. Not wanting to disturb her he walked in slowly but somehow she had felt his presence. He sighed inwardly. He had failed to give her even a few moments of peace. He contemplated going outside but she had already walked to her side of the bed. It felt so strange. The same girl who evoked such strong feelings inside of him was so close yet she was definitely not his! But a part of him was glad she stayed away tonight. Aahil still had a difficult time controlling his emotions around her. Every fight would end up with him hurting her feelings and her walking away in tears. The same tears that broke his heart. It made him realize that he had nothing to offer her but pain. She didnt care for him yet she had gotten him a cake for his birthday when those who cared or said they did had forgotten. Aahil knew he was wrong in accusing her but a part of him was still seeking answers to his questions. Her lips claimed to hate him while her eyes though holding anger, also displayed disappointment and something more. He could not figure her out. Aahil changed out of his work clothes and took a quick shower. He had a long day at work and the past couple of days, especially his birthday had been unpleasant. He still could not understand how his Ammi and Rehan forgot his birthday. Things had changed so much post the nikah. Its as if everyone had their own agenda but his feelings no longer mattered. But did they even matter in the first place? Aahil reprimanded himself for such thoughts. Of course his Ammi loved him more than anything! She probably had forgotten in the hassle behind the wedding and property papers. Ammi wanted to secure the future of her children and she was absolutely correct in doing so. He was just overreacting. Aahil felt fatique take over. He rested his head on his side of the pillow and pulled up the covers. He just wanted to sleep away these feelings and wake up to a fresh day. The night seemed long already.

3 AM

Sanam slowly opened her eyes. It could not possibly be morning yet. She heard voices behind her. Badi Ammi is probably doing prayers and Haya is sitting on the porch doing her embriodery work as she loves to each morning. Had she woken up too early? Were they still asleep? But then who was mumbling. It definitely sounded like a male voice. Suddenly Sanam's eyes adjusted in the dark room and she realized where she was. Her throat felt dry. It was still her reality and she was still Choti Begum of Bhopal, a title she would happily give away to the first person asking. Badi Ammi and Haya were far away from her. Sanam controlled herself as the barely audible mumbling got a bit louder. Along with this, she had to remind herself of who the man sleeping next to her was. She was sure he was dreaming... about a girl or maybe many girls. Sanam tried to close her eyes and get back to sleep. But now the movement besides her as well as the mumbling grew louder. Yesterday he accused her of tossing and turning and look whose doing that now. Abhi dikhati hoon! She turned on the light and looked to her right. Suddenly her anger changed to worry. Something was wrong! She tried to silence her growing heartbeats and tried to listen to what he was saying. "Please dont hit me. Maine jan buj kar nahi giraya apka glass. Please bahut dard hota hai. Aaj ke liye maaf kardijiye please." Aahil murmured in his sleep. There were creased on his forehead and he look as if he was in pain. Must be a bad dream, Sanam thought. She was scared to go near in case he woke up but tried to reassure him. "Koi nahi hain yaha aapko koi nahi marega. I promise calm down..." But now tears were coming down the side of his eyes. Sanam hovered her hand over his forehead but stopped. Did she have the right to? Flashes of their nikah came to her mind. Even if he didnt accept their relationship... And neither did she it doesn't change the truth. She was his wife and above all a human being! She could not see him suffer like this and do nothing at all to help, Sanam thought determinedly and slowly carressed his forehead but he was too disturbed. He kept on turning and wincing in pain. She was wondering if she should call someone when he suddenly wrapped his arms around her and curled into her lap. She was too shocked to move. "Please tell him not to hit me. Yeh galti dobara nahin hoga mujhse. Bohot dar lagta hai unse... Please mujhe yaha se dur le jao... Main aur dard nahin seh sakta please plea...se". His voice was choking up and was barely audible. Sanam's instincts told her this was much more than an imaginative nightmare. His tears were not stopping. Sanam felt her heart sink. His words... Something felt wrong. Sanam felt a lump form her throat as his warm tears fell on her hand. She tried to remove it but he held on tighter as if he was scared she would leave him alone to get hurt. Sanam didnt even have the heart move it a second time. She felt her own tears trickle down her face. For once she felt his pain. At this moment all their fights, his harsh words, her strong retorts meant nothing. She just knew he needed her. She took her free hand and slowly caressed his hair. "Shh mere hoti hui aapko koi nahi mar sakta. Mai use dur bhaga dungi... Aap so jao. Dekhna sab theek ho jayega..." She started to feel him relax. She felt her own worry lessen. She didnt know how long she had sat there waiting for the moment to pass. She thanked Allah that her words soothed him and thing were a bit more normal. Sanam felt guilt stab her. He didnt sleep peacefully. Atleast she rarely got nightmares especially such powerful ones and if even if she did holding on to Badi Ammi and Haya always made her feel safe. Aahil didnt even have Begum Sahiba around during his growing years. His sisters and Rehan were younger and Khala Khalu could not think past eating let along supporting and being there for him. Sanam recalled her words about him not being loved and looked at the man sleeping peacefully on her lap. He may have sound countless things to hurt her but no one deserved to be left alone. Sanam wiped her tears and calmed herself. She was very lucky! No matter what her family was always there for her. Even if she missed her parents, Badi Ammi and Haya made up for it with their unconditional love. But Aahil did not have that luxury. But tonight her words and touch made a difference! Without knowing she had become a part of him and he in turn become a part of her. Sanam felt a strange pull towards him... Almost the need to shield and heal him. Now no matter what happens in the morning, Sanam would not deny that somewhere hidden inside this arrogant ruthless man lies a hurt child... One who wants to be protected and loved. Sanam doesnt know if he is capable of loving back but the fact that he wants to be loved touched her. It was a start. She doesnt know if she can provide him with that love considering he hates her... But from now on she would try to be more careful and less hurtful with her words. If not heal... She would try not to reopen the wounds that are already present.

Sehri Time

The alarm for sehri buzzed as Sanam was just about to go back to a deeper state of sleep. She rubbed her eyes and looked at Aahil next to her. He seemed to be much more comfortable. So much that Sanam did not feel like waking him up. She turned on her lamp. In the dim light she could see him breathing steadily in his sleep. A few locks of his hair had fell on his forhead and eyes. He looked so harmless and gentle in his sleep. The creases were gone and he looked relaxed. She had to admit he looked innocent almost cute? Sanam shook of her silly thoughts and got up to pray. As she was moving off the bed she heard a voice behind her say, "cant you even get up without waking up the whole town! How many times have I told you that while staying in my room you cannot disturb me! Your lucky its sehri time and I have to be up anyway!" For once Sanam did not minds his words. Instead a small smile appeared on her lips and she rushed to the bathroom before he could see her. Thank you Allah Miya! Things are definitely back to normal, she thought!

"Latif theek naam diya hai Mohatarma Duffer!" Aahil whined and got up. As much as waking up so early was painful, Aahil surprisingly felt relaxed. Its was if after a long time he had a peaceful sleep at night. Perhaps he was too tired earlier and thats why he slept well. In fact he could hardly remember what he did before sleeping. He felt fresh and refreshed. But for some odd reason he had felt as if she had touched him... his forehead... In a loving and caring way? After that night he could not forget how she felt... Her arms wrapped around him. Her touch brings about a sense of belonging. Which might be misplaced since he means nothing but trouble in her life. But still tonight he felt the same peaceful feeling he did while hugging her. Maybe he dreamt her touch and sleeping so close to her must be making him imagine whats not there and will never be! Aahil rolled his eyes. He felt stupid to think she would come that close to him. He knew if she had the option she would walk away at the first chance. She herself said it on their wedding night. Just the thought made him feel hollow so he shrugged off the thought. He was feeling good after a long time and he didn't want to ruin the feeling. Though he is probably the main reason for all her troubles, Aahil hoped that one day if not give her happiness... he would be able to take away all her pain!

So basically this was all about Sanam realizing Aahil has more to him that what he shows and how both internally wish to get rid of each other's pain not knowing that this can be done if they accept that they love each other and start openly caring. Both of them would be able to give the other love, care and happiness and essentially complete each other. The OS is inspired from Tera Hi Bas Hona Chahoon. I love this song from Haunted and I feel this song suits SaHil perfectly! They r each others destiny because no matter how much they fight... Their hearts beat for each other :) Most of the song describes Aahil's feelings... After watching the new video I feel those four lines suit Sanam alot! I wrote this OS in 45 minutes so its certainly not my best work! The title doesn't fit exactly but the song inspired me to write this. Still i hope u guys liked it :) plz feel free to comment n give suggestions. I hope to write much better OSs with more intense n emotional connect n even fun ones. This is just the start! Since I love SaHil so much I will try to make more posts n b active! There is a request for another OS n I will work on it as soon as i find the right scenario. Its the one where SaHil r caught in an unavoidable intimate situation and Aahil shies away first thus Sanam realizes the respect he has for her. If anyone has any scenarios in mind plz lmk n I will use that as a starting point! Anyway hope u enjoyed reading n plz do comment if u liked it! Also if anyone makes vms plz do make one on this song with SaHil! Once u hear the lyrics u will c why it fits them! Everyone here whose OS I have read r amazing so I hope my small effort will b noticed and appreciated :) Thanks for reading! Another thing I live in the US so sehri is around 3:30ish so I have no idea when it is in India so plz forgive me if the timing is not exact lol Thanks again!