Posted:
As a survivor of abuse myself, I want to apologize to other victims as well that we COULD NOT make this forum a safe space for you, and for me.
1) Lack of Trigger Warnings on post, many of us do not want to click a post that advocates a love story between an abuser and the abused. Many of us have been told to get over it, whether it's a brother, a father figure or a spouse, to love them again, to not go blab our mouths because it will bring down the family and separate them. And imagine watching that as a victim of abuse, seeing something you literally went through playing back to you, imagine the memories and feelings that can trigger.
SO PLEASE, everyone here please put TW in your thread. Eg. TW for discussion of violence/abuse
2) Lack of support from fellow women in the 21st century; so many women here want a love story between Samrat and Urmi, because Samrat is good looking. Please look beyond the actor (even if he is playing his character well) to see what you are supporting. Where is the solidarity between sisters in humanity? You owe it to others to be sensitive because you don't know who may be standing there, crying and cringing inside because everything your comments bring up. Are we unaware of all that happens everyday to us and women and can no longer empathize?!?
3) Lack of support from older figures. The drama has done this one so well, good to know that no one and now that disgusting thauji also does not support Urmi. Instead people think just get over it. HOW DOES ONE GET OVER ABUSE?! Please let me know, because many of us victims never do.
4) VICTIM BLAMING- PLEASE PLEASE STOP THIS. A lot of members are like Urmi needs to stand up for herself, why is she so weak? So if the victim was just stronger, then abuse would not happen? I don't know if its a lack of education of basic sociology and psychological concepts, but women are SOCIALIZED to shut up, to take and take, look at Urmi's grandma and mom, they are taught from when they were young to just take whatever their husband throws at them, it becomes engrained in their mind. You think years of psychological conditioning is easy to break?
Other things like Urmi should make Samrat change, or not do certain things to piss him off. IT IS NEVER, AND I REPEAT NEVER the fault of a victim to change someone else, that is not her onus. IT IS THE ABUSERS. She can ignore him for the rest of her life. DO NOT DEEM ON TO OTHERS WHAT YOU THINK THEY SHOULD DO. You are not the one who can tell victims of abuse to how they can seek reconciliation, we know how to do it ourselves, we understand trajectories of abuse are different among different people.
That is all.
Mannat Har Khushi Paane Ki
Mahadev And Sons
Cricket
