Incurable Illness....Bravo or Sorry

In this era, when we have progressed so much in technology field, we are still bowing our heads to some of these ill ness.

I lost my father last year due to Cancer, When I wnet home to see him during his treatment, i was never happy. I always felt sadness seeing him suffering.A man who raised his kids on his own, refusing to take over jamindari of his father and always stood up for his principle. Cancer and treatment had made him weak and I always had tears hidden in my eyes. My father was always happy as usual but I could not bring fake smile. my presence I think made him weaker as he could sense my sadness, used to try to cheer me up, by mocking and playing with my kids . He would have been 60 yrs today.

Last week I lost my friend who was 32 yrs and left her spouse and two school going kids. She was undergoing the treatment for last two yrs but full of life. Was laid off from her teaching job due to treatment as she had become very fragile. But yet she she did not let anyone feel sorry for her and started her MS. Just two weeks prior to her death, she rceived her degree.

Now my question is how do youreact with patient that you know have these diesease. I may have been very week in both instances as I refused to visit my friend for almost a year. I only spoke to her on phon. It is hard to see an active person so fragile. I want to keep her active memory in my mind. Because for my father, since I was with him a month before he passed away, so I have that fragile memory more instead of the memory of pleasant days with him. Unfortunately, even my kids remember him that way as they really didnot get much time to spent with him as they were too little then.

Is it possible to be brave with such patients, specially when they are so near and dear 😕 I failed miserably in that 😭. Bravo to those who are able to do that👏

Sorry if I am not making any sense as bit upset 😭

Thanks Pic and tisha. Bravo to you both 👏 👏
Somehow I could not do it. My fake smile was fake. May be because i went just for couple of weeks, that too becuase he was diagnosed. Same with my friend too.
I still feel terrible when i see others father visiting them I know this is mean, but I do 😳 I really envy when parenst or in laws visit some one. 😳
I miss them and as Tisha said, will try to remeber only good things 😊
thanks for sharing your thoughts 😊

Deepest condolences!!

Even though we don't know each other well, will take the liberty to 🤗.Have been to similar situation can relate.And no it's not mean IMHO to ("I still feel terrible when i see others father visiting them I know this is mean, but I do "), can relate 😳

Topic -
Being myself I would bury the pain / sadness deep inside me and make it worth while time with family or friends (God Forbidd), suffering with terminal illness,imagining the impact that my weakness will cause on samney wala. Finally things that are out of control, what can be - realizing this fact would carry on with life.

I rarely post in this section.... but would love to 🤗 you all. I would be totally devastated if I had to deal with something like this, or see a close family member or friend suffer. Sometimes I feel it is better they don't suffer for long, and it is sad especially for everyone around them to deal with it.

I too lost my Dad 3 yrs ago he died of a stroke he was in coma for a week and then passed away. I do pray for him and look back at pics that we have, but then we do remember all the good times we have shared with our loved ones.

Originally posted by: Connie

I rarely post in this section.... but would love to 🤗 you all. I would be totally devastated if I had to deal with something like this, or see a close family member or friend suffer. Sometimes I feel it is better they don't suffer for long, and it is sad especially for everyone around them to deal with it.

I too lost my Dad 3 yrs ago he died of a stroke he was in coma for a week and then passed away. I do pray for him and look back at pics that we have, but then we do remember all the good times we have shared with our loved ones.

awww so sorry to hear that 🤗... I agree with yaa and Tisha.. on good times to be remembered for ever.. 😊

Lata, Anshu, Connie, Tish, DB jaan

At situations like this I am always at loss of words. Here's to all of you

🤗

Lata, sorry about that. Its tough... Sometimes words are not sufficient to express what one feels during such times..

Each one reacts differently..... some strong, some not so strong... but the best thing to do is to live life the best way one can... take the good and the bad and keep smiling, at least it makes life worthwhile.......


My grandmom, living with us, has been aflicted with a form of Alzhimers for the past 7 years... Today, she is almost comatose, so she is spared the agony of seeing herself suffer, but in the initial stages, it was tough. She was the proverbial Iron Lady of our family, the strongest of her siblings, she was the ultimate authority in both her family and my grand dads, she had an overpowering personality and quick thinker... When she started to lose control on her mental faculties, it was such a big blow to her and to our families..... She knew each and every member of the vast family and to see her blink vaguely when her son in law came in front of her was the worst day of our lives... She realised she was going deeper in.... and that struggle to overcoem this deficiency was visible in her face till a couple of years back when the ailment got better of her. Today, to see her, lying in a bed, a mere shadow of her former formidable self is agonising.... and there is nothing that we could do other than provide her with food and love... and its an agonising situation for all of us😭

Sorry to hear about that Lata, dunno what to say, just felt like posting here. May god give you strength to overcome such difficult and emotional moments, bottomline is that you loved them immensly and thats what matters.

Lata, Anshu, Connie, Tish, DB Doll, and Priya: I don't have words to express my thoughts right now....... 🤗 I love you all 🤗

duniya mein kitney ghum hain
mera ghum kitna kum hai

sach.....bahut brave ho tum log 😊