In the defense of Mala..

Beauceant thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#1

From what I have seen in my quick glance of the posts today, the majority seems to be against Mala- what she did and what she represents. Mostly repeating what I said in reply to another post, but I just thought Mala deserved a thread in her defense😆

Here are some of the grievances against this lady-

1. Leaving her husband- She probably has not got a divorce from Dilsher and so in an adulteress.

Mala has not till now been shown to be the kind of woman who just leaves her husband of almost 10 years, just because the grass seemed greener on the other side. And Dilsher is far far from being an ideal husband. Although a large part of his bitterness towards beautiful women is post Mala ditching him, ha most likely did have a complex even before. He is a lame, not very good looking man, who is married to a very beautiful woman. In such marriages its quite common for the person with the inferiority complex to take it out on the partner. The relationship between Mala and Dilsher was strained with or without Tejawat.
I dont think her leaving Dilsher requires much defense at all, except the moral outrage, for which all I can say is I applaud her courage for daring to get out of a relationship that was harming her.

2. Leaving her son- The grave and unpardonable offence.

Stated in plain words it does appear so. But before condemning her lets see some facts before us-

Is there anything to say she was an unloving mother before she left? NO. On the contrary even after she left, even with all the poisonous words from Mohini and Dilsher, the child Rudra had faith in her, her love for him.

Did she just leave him to Dilsher's mercies? Even before she left with the man she loved, she mae sure her son was acceptable to him and its hinted she came back for him. What were the circumstances that prevented her from doing this- whether accidental or intentional (on the part of Thakur or Mohini) is yet to be revealed.

All this does not absolve her of her deeds but attempts to look at the intentions behind the actions.

Now, why would a woman do such a thing.

That is for the future track to explore, but I surely hope they dont spoil it by showing Mala as a grasping conniving woman who just left in search of greener pastures.

From what we have seen of her, as the benevolent thakurain for the villagers, as the thakurain maasa for Paro, as a friend to Paro's mother, in the memories of Rudra- she is not a bad person, but a victim of her circumstances. Just what drove her to take such a drastic measure, there are so many possibilities. Life with Dilsher would not be easy as it is, add dear Mohini to the equation to create misunderstandings and conflicts and lack of support from any side- it is a miserable life for a woman. Into this picture enters the Thakur- who at that time appears all that is perfect to her- loving,caring, kind to everyone, willing to rescue her and her son. Is it so much of a crime for a woman to try and hold onto the one hope she has? To look for a better life for herself and her son, away from a torturing family.

Most of us would not think twice before criticizing the ever crying bahus in various shows who put up with all kinds of cruelty from MILs, husbands and go on shedding tears at alarming rates but never daring to take a step away from it.. In a way isn't that what Mala has done? She was a bad judge of character when it came to Tejawat but is that so much of a crime to hold against her.

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tttttt1 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#2
i am a minority here lol
i will repost what i posted somewhere else
let me start be saying yes a mom is always very protective ,and multiple examples of woman tolerating everything because of their kids , but is it right to expect a woman to be in a relationship cos she is a mother ,
what if dilsher was a excessive , possessive husband or abusive , so i res my comments
about rudra , yes he is hurt , leaving her child is wrong , i thought she came back to take him (danveer's words)
failed relationships have repercussions children face it the most , but is it right to expect people to continue in the relationship cos of that
i think a better way is to handle the failed relationship better , not let the children feel or lose trust

as much as mala failed here , dilsher failed in a bigger way , because he burdened rudra with his hatred too

Zeeliciousxo thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#3
Knowing all that Rudra went through as a child, and even goes through today, I cannot sympathize with her. Perhaps I can sympathize with the wife who felt she had no choice but to run away, but there is no way I can sympathize with the mother. Why did she not take her son with her when she ran away?? Would that have been so difficult to do?? If Dilsher was a mean and terrible person, why did she only think of her own escape? Why did she not take her son with her, so he could escape as well?? If he was a terrible husband he was most likely a crappy father as well. Why not spare Rudra from him? Yes it's hinted that she came back for Rudra, but it seems that she came back for him more because she missed him than because she wanted to save him from Dilsher's clutches as well.

We don't really know the story so I guess I can't really ask all these questions yet, but no matter what the story turns out to be, I will bang my head against the wall if Paro supports Mala instead of Rudra. All Rudra needs is support, if Paro cannot even give him this in such a sensitive period, then I don't even know what to say. Yes Paro sees Mala as her mother but she is married to Rudra, a husband and wife are a team, and she claims to love Rudra more than anything, so even if she doesn't agree with him, as his wife she should support him and stand by him. I want to see Paro angry at Mala, angry for what Mala put Rudra through because she (Paro) feels Rudra's pain like it's her own and she can't take it.

P.S. I wonder if the precap is another dream 😕 Because in the segments we saw today Rudra and Paro are romancing in the bedroom, eating together, packing together, falling on their bed together...how do they go back to acting that way after such a huge truth is revealed to Paro? 😆Shouldn't Paro have like a million questions to ask Rudra...they can literally use an entire episode to just show Paro's reactions and questions to Rudra...😛 But they seem to be rushing everything...so hopefully the precap is real.
Edited by Zeeliciousxo - 11 years ago
Beauceant thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#4

Originally posted by: ttt1

i am a minority here lol

i will repost what i posted somewhere else
let me start be saying yes a mom is always very protective ,and multiple examples of woman tolerating everything because of their kids , but is it right to expect a woman to be in a relationship cos she is a mother ,
what if dilsher was a excessive , possessive husband or abusive , so i res my comments
about rudra , yes he is hurt , leaving her child is wrong , i thought she came back to take him (danveer's words)
failed relationships have repercussions children face it the most , but is it right to expect people to continue in the relationship cos of that
i think a better way is to handle the failed relationship better , not let the children feel or lose trust

as much as mala failed here , dilsher failed in a bigger way , because he burdened rudra with his hatred too


Exactly my point.. Sometimes mental torment can be a lot lot worse than physical. Considering what Dilsher did to Rudra in the past 15 years, I think he is very much capable of being a tormenting husband.

She stayed on for quite a long time, and that must be for her son's sake. Dilsher who now seems much reformed must be asked what his reformed self now thinks of Mala's deeds.. If he is truly trying to change he should be able to look at Mala too in a different angle.

Definitely a minority.. I felt bad for the judgmental attitude towards Mala. How can one just label her a bad mother without the barest facts..
Edited by Msfrootie - 11 years ago
Beauceant thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: Zeeliciousxo

Knowing all that Rudra went through as a child, and even goes through today, I cannot sympathize with her. Perhaps I can sympathize with the wife who felt she had no choice but to run away, but there is no way I can sympathize with the mother. Why did she not take her son with her when she ran away?? Would that have been so difficult to do?? If Dilsher was a mean and terrible person, why did she only think of her own escape? Why did she not take her son with her, so he could escape as well?? If he was a terrible husband he was most likely a crappy father as well. Why not spare Rudra from him? Yes it's hinted that she came back for Rudra, but it seems that she came back for him more because she missed him than because she wanted to save him from Dilsher's clutches as well.


We don't really know the story so I guess I can't really ask all these questions yet, but no matter what the story turns out to be, I will bang my head against the wall if Paro supports Mala instead of Rudra. All Rudra needs is support, if Paro cannot even give him this in such a sensitive period, then I don't even know what to say. Yes Paro sees Mala as her mother but she is married to Rudra, a husband and wife are a team, and she claims to love Rudra more than anything, so even if she doesn't agree with him, as his wife she should support him and stand by him. I want to see Paro angry at Mala, angry for what Mala put Rudra through because she (Paro) feels Rudra's pain like it's her own and she can't take it.

P.S. I wonder if the precap is another dream 😕 Because in the segments we saw today Rudra and Paro are romancing in the bedroom, eating together, packing together, falling on their bed together...how do they go back to acting that way after such a huge truth is revealed to Paro? 😆Shouldn't Paro have like a million questions to ask Rudra...they can literally use an entire episode to just show Paro's reactions and questions to Rudra...😛 But they seem to be rushing everything...so hopefully the precap is real.


I think its a little early to label her a bad mother.. Before she left Rudra remembers her as a loving caring mother, but he does not have anything fond to remember of his father, even as he lay on his death bed.. Even after she leaves him, despite all the brain washing from Dilsher and Mohini the child in Rudra remembers her with love and hope. It is as he grows and as the bitterness of Dilsher rubs off on him that he starts hating her.. Now, Rudra is justified in his response, I dont dispute that.

Why she did not take him along the first time, is yet a mystery. It could have been merely circumstancial or may be Thakursa was pretening all along that he was ok with her son. This is quite a clinchingg point where the maa track stands right?

I do agree she could have done more.. Even when Paro was thrown out of the village by thakur it was just said Mala was not informed.. Makes me wonder if this lady is all good intentions and no action..😆

I think Paro will be highly conflicted and may take a neutral stance. She knows the extent of Rudra's pain and the recent confession about mistrusting him makes it unlikley she would outright take Mala's side. But she has always had difficulty in believing bad things about anyone (even Laila) so her not giving the benefit of doubt to her Thakurain maasa is unlikely. As you said her place is beside RUdra and Mala is the one who has to make the explanations- which Laila and Thakur seem to be facilitaing..😕

Yeah the speed is rather a bit much.. Mostly i need to watch twice to make sense of all that happened😆
They do tend to leave the depths of emotions unexplored in this break neck pace.. For an intensly emotional saga like RR, that's rather bad..The Laila jealousy track could have been muchmore emotional with little less of facial twitching..
Pretty much in the same state of confusion as you are.. But would such huge revelations be dreams??
Edited by Msfrootie - 11 years ago
tttttt1 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#6

Originally posted by: Msfrootie


Exactly my point.. Sometimes mental torment can be a lot lot worse than physical. Considering what Dilsher did to Rudra in the past 15 years, I think he is very much capable of being a tormenting husband.

She stayed on for quite a long time, and that must be for her son's sake. Dilsher who now seems much reformed must be asked what his reformed self now thinks of Mala's deeds.. If he is truly trying to change he should be able to look at Mala too in a different angle.

i dont thing mala is intended to be negative character she was shown being a mother to paro , but she should have checked on her son thats true
but we dont know whether she tried to
lets see how they take it forward
dilsher i find him the most interesting character of the lot
he was clearly wrong, he made his son what he is today
all the hatred , anger , but on the other hand he wants to correct it , he still trusts , he trusted paro when there was evidence against her
he gave his wife her due respect by making her a part of rudra;s wedding , by giving paro her saree , i think that was partly repentance
that man doesnt hate his wife now , past is yet to be seen , i think we have only seen the repentance track of dilsher not his darker side , except some parts in the beginning
Edited by tttttt1 - 11 years ago
Snoowfall thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#7
i am sure when the truth of why she left comes out it would be bigger reason...expect the unexpected that is our show...so not passing any judgement unless i see what was her side of the story...
and coming to Dilshe, i felt he failed Rudra in a bigger way...but never too late to correct your mistakes right? lets see what they have in store for us...
Edited by Snoowfall - 11 years ago
Beauceant thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#8

Originally posted by: ttt1

i dont thing mala is intended to be negative character she was shown being a mother to paro , but she should have checked on her son thats true
but we dont know whether she tried to
lets see how they take it forward
dilsher i find him the most interesting character of the lot
he was clearly wrong, he made his son what he is today
all the hatred , anger , but on the other hand he wants to correct it , he still trusts , he trusted paro when there was evidence against her
he gave his wife her due respect by making her a part of rudra;s wedding , by giving paro her saree , i think that was partly repentance
that man doesnt hate his wife now , past is yet to be seen , i think we have only seen the repentance track of dilsher not his darker side , except some parts in the beginning


@ red- Yeah the bangles and the saree could be his way of repentance.. Frankly his decided trust and support for Paro needs a little clarification, considering all he's said and done till then..

Dilsher's past and his response to the return of Mala (imminent now) will be interesting to watch.. The creatives have tried to maintain both him and Mala as more positive than negative characters, I want to see how/if they maintain it further in the track.. And not spoil it up like the Laila track making her the evil one..
Beauceant thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#9

Originally posted by: Snoowfall

i am sure when the truth of why she left comes out it would be bigger reason...expect the unexpected that is our show...so not passing any judgement unless i see what was her side of the story...

and coming to Dilshe, i felt he failed Rudra in a bigger way...but never too late to correct your mistakes right? lets see what they have in store for us...


Seeing how they dealt with the Laila track, I fear they ll just sacrifice Thakursa- make him utterly evil and Mala the victim and Dilsher an innocent bystander. I do hope they do more than that.. Its easy to put all blame on Thakur like all blame went to Laila in the earlier episodes.. Fervently hoping for something better in this one,,


tttttt1 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#10

Originally posted by: Msfrootie


Seeing how they dealt with the Laila track, I fear they ll just sacrifice Thakursa- make him utterly evil and Mala the victim and Dilsher an innocent bystander. I do hope they do more than that.. Its easy to put all blame on Thakur like all blame went to Laila in the earlier episodes.. Fervently hoping for something better in this one,,


word!
laila i dont know what they made her into , a murderer , a criminal and now a traitor , only so that rudra can escape any guilt of having a relationship with her and move on without even informing her

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