FF : Tere Mere Darmiyaan LAST PART pg-87 dt.10.10.14 - Page 16

Chapter 4

" RUK JAA..NAHINN." dutta snarled like a wounded beast. His hands fist and his legs kicked restlessly. Suddenly he raised his arm as if to stop somebody then dropped it in defeat. He clenched his teeth and his back bowed as though the bed was on fire beneath him. He was writhing in pain and thrashing violently. Torment and agony twisted his face. He jerked awake and bolted upright.

A dream only a dream.

But it had been so real. His body was drenched with sweat despite the cold. He sprang from the bed gulping for breath. He stood at the center of the room. His heart pounded loudly inside his chest. He held his head in his hands as slowly reality closed in around him.

Nakusha stared horrified at dutta's retreating back as he left the room in a hurry. She had barely drifted off to sleep when his loud cries had woken her up. He'd been groaning in pain and kicking the bed relentlessly. She'd wanted to wake him up from his nightmare but feared getting close to him thinking that he might strike her unknowingly in his dream. And that's exactly what happened when she tried to shake him, he shoved her hand with so much force that she lost balance and fell on the floor.

Covering her mouth with her hand she breathed hard as her heart thudded violently in shock. Her eyes refused to believe that they had actually witnessed his dark and battered side.

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Surrounded by dense darkness he tried to adjust his vision to see. With the winter setting in he was supposed to be extra cautious while driving but he wasn't. He could have avoided going out but at that very moment he only wished to run away. Anything familiar wouldn't appease him. Memories flashed in his mind like film chips. Everything was clear and fresh in his thoughts as if it all happened just yesterday. Had someone else been in his place he would have driven slower or perhaps would not have driven at all at this hour of the night, fearing to meet with an accident or even getting killed. To make matters worse, PV was very hilly and steep. However none of these fears crossed his mind. He was simply anxious to get out of this place. The anger building inside him demanded release as he seldom withheld his temper.The dense mist totally consumed his mind and body. His mind couldn't stop itself from playing events of his past. The past that haunted him. The past that never let him rest in peace. He scrunched his nose and gripped the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles turned white. When he loved her so much then why did she leave him? How could she be that insensitive? Why wasn't she with him? Did his love mean nothing to her? He slammed his fist hard against the closed window. Oh, God he missed her, he missed her from the very depths of his now shattered heart!

Without caring to slow down the speed, he drove down the hill and wasn't feeling eerie about this idea not even when he took a sharp turn and his black sedan skidded off the slippery road. He managed to keep control of the wheel when the car slid and swerved all over the place. It was extremely dangerous, not only he could go off the hill but also another car could come around in the other direction. After all it was a blind corner. But he enjoyed living on the edge. Putting his life at stake and then combating all the risks around, thrilled him. After veering sharply for the last time he took one hard left turn and instead of falling off the hill he ended up jolting the car against a tree. The maneuver caused him to snap forward and sit there for a few moments in silence. He curled his fingers firmly around the wheel as his heart thudded loudly. Oddly the whole incident soothed his alarming nerves.

The place that he was so eager to reach was visible in the distance, so he decided to walk over there. It was on the outskirts of PV , where nobody knew him as dutta bhau. He was no longer the owner and caretaker of PV. He was not responsible to anyone for his actions and could afford to be himself without bothering of what people thought of him.

He pushed the wooden door hard and entered the pub. It wasn't an ordinary pub. It was a place where one could drink his heart out and also beat the living daylights out of someone in front of a huge screaming crowd. The atmosphere was electrifying. Raunchy music blared in one corner. High voltage bulbs hung from the ceiling. And clouds of cigarette smoke filled the air. Drunkards sitting around slammed their beer mugs on the table in enjoyment while watching fighters thrash each other black and blue. Considering the complete absence of rules and safety equipments these were bloody dangerous fights. At a time when top fighters tend to display their skills only in huge closed circuited arenas, these battles were fought in virtual secrecy behind closed doors.

Dutta grabbed a beer bottle from a table as he walked passed it and drained almost half of it in one go. The bitter liquid burned his throat as it went down. The crowd was cheering for him and waiting impatiently to see their top fighter in action once again. He sat down on a chair and stared at the huge iron made cage where fights took place, replacing the boxing or fighting rings. At a time when thousands of rupees rode on the outcome of such matches, dutta was of another sort who didn't compete for money instead for more personal and passionate reasons.

The crowd that was till now only roaring for him changed sides slightly when Maleshwar Anna came to the scene. He was tall, square shouldered and strong limbed. He had a broad face, solid jaw, prominent chin and was dutta's fiercest opponent. Although he never won against dutta but always succeeded to give him a tough fight. He glared at dutta wickedly while deciding to do some pull ups before beating the hell out of him. He looked up at the metal bar, it was probably more than seven feet off the ground. He rubbed his hands then hopped up and gripped the bar. Finding a place between his hands he started to pull himself up and as he came down he pushed in an arc away from the bar, then swung back up, pulling the bar under his chin. He managed thirty pull ups then dropped to the ground panting and shaking his arms. Dutta openly smirked at him and took the last sip of his beer. Then tossed the empty bottle aside. It shattered into small pieces.

The bell rung announcing the start of the match. Dutta stood up. He took off his loosely hung watch, slipped it inside his black kurta then pealed off the kurta and dropped it on the chair. He was equally tall but leaner and not muscular when compared to his opponent. He rotated his shoulders then tilted his head to both sides a few times before getting into that huge cage through a small door. The referee blew the whistle and brought both dutta and anna together. The referee in these kinds of fights were there only for namesake. More than often the referee got shoved aside if he intervened beyond the liking of the fighters.

Anna sniggered as he taped his hands. Just once, just once he wanted to knock down dutta and thrash him to the pulp. The referee blew the whistle one more time before backing away and the whole crowd erupted in excitement. Both dutta and anna began circling each other. Anna's eyes were spitting venom and he spat," dutta, aaj tu nahin bachega."

Dutta shook his head, he was amused by Anna's level of confidence.

" itni jaldi bhool gaya, yaad nahin pichli baar tujhe ..kutte ki tarah peeta tha." Dutta retorted through gritted teeth.

As expected, his words ended up wounding Anna's ego just the way he wanted. Anna bared his teeth and grabbed dutta by his vest and pushed him up against the wall of the cage. With his face merely inches from Anna's, dutta looked enraged as his gaze travelled from anna's hands that were gripping his vest to anna's face. Dutta flared his nostrils and curled his fingers around anna's wrists attempting to free himself. Anna clenched his jaws and kicked dutta in the shin. Dutta grunted but didn't loosen his grip around anna's wrists. Anna's arms were flexed tight in anger as he smirked at dutta who didn't move a muscle. Dutta was glaring at anna, breathing hard and until now completely in control. Anna looked at dutta up and down and sniggered again. The crowd banged their beer mugs on the table and roared," ANNA ..ANNA".

Anna took a step back, released dutta and turned his back on him. Dutta knew his strategy and allowed anna to take the first shot. And he wasn't disappointed. Anna grabbed him by his shoulder, pulled him around to face him and punched dutta, square in the jaw. Blood spattered from the corner of dutta's mouth and forehead as he hit the ground hard. His fingers slowly felt the corner of his mouth that was bleeding. He stared at the drops of blood on his finger tips. This was what he wanted. Pain and blood. Pain inflicted on himself was the only way that helped him to deal with the chaos of his past as though he deserved to be pained and punished. However pain when inflicted on others gave him a sense of satisfaction and victory as though he succeeded in bringing the world down to his feet. And blood awakened the sleeping beast inside him. Blood triggered the predator, the conqueror inside him who demanded to see his opponent biting the dust.

Dutta wiped the blood dripping from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand. Anger coursed through his veins and his eyes were blood shot as he stood up and growled.

"ANNA"

For a moment, people who were roaring went silent. And then dutta punched anna twice, once in the nose and then in the gut, sending him to the ground. Anna should have remained there but he didn't and got back up, swinging. Dutta curled his fingers in a tight fist once again and attacked him with another right hook to the jaw, then gripped anna by his shoulders and pulled him down against his knee, right to the gut and threw him to the muddy ground one more time. The spectators clapped, whistled and began cheering again, this time " DUTTA DUTTA" echoed around.

Dutta fuming in rage and panting heavily, pointed at Anna gesturing him to stay down and dare not get up. But anna was a tough competitor who refused to bow down instead he was on his feet again, this time more shaky. He rubbed his stomach and lunched for dutta , fists flew but dutta crouched and caught him around his torso and slammed him hard against the wall before pushing him down the ground. Anna wheezed, coughed and winced in pain. The referee whistled to stop the fight as it was getting ugly. He attempted to pull back dutta and declare him the winner but dutta wasn't finished yet. He ignored the whistle and pushed the referee aside. Then fisted anna's vest, pulled him up and started punching his face left and right. Every blow calmed dutta's adrenaline and anger running through him.

The referee knew that dutta was strong, he could really hurt someone, in fact he could kill someone, hence he intervened once again and tried to pull him away from anna. Dutta punched his opponent one last time, knocking him out completely. Bleeding anna fell back in defeat, his ribs were bruised probably even broken.

Sweat oozed from every pore of dutta's body drenching his hair and vest completely. His muscles ached but didn't hurt, he reveled in the pain as a sense of triumph swept his whole being. The rowdy spectators stood up, whistled and clapped for him. However his arrogance didn't permit him to lift his arm in acknowledgement. Kicking the small gate he stepped out of the cage, picked up his kurta and slung it over his shoulder. The manager immediately came up to him with the money that he'd won. Like always dutta raised his hand and stopped him. He didn't come here to fill his pockets with bundle of notes. What he derived from these fights only he knew, it was something beyond money and adulation. Something that couldn't be expressed in words. Lost in his thoughts, he grabbed another bottle of beer, poured it down his throat and left the place.

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A damned bird chirped near his ear. The sound made his head hurt. He cautiously opened his eyes. Sunlight stabbed his pupils. He groaned and attempted to angle an arm over his face. Squinting against the brightness he struggled to focus . He was lying on the back seat of his sedan. He stared stupidly at the rear passenger window and found the bird that had awakened him, perched at the edge of the lowered glass. The constant chirping of it exploded inside his head. " HATT '". He caught his head in his hands. The events of the previous night flashed before him. So much had happened and so much had changed in one single night.

He took out the watch from his kurta, glanced at it while slipping it back on his hand. It was time to go home. He pulled the kurta down his head and then with a splitting headache he crawled over the front seat to drive home.

He recalled nakusha's fear stricken face after getting a glimpse of his dark past. He pursed his lips in frustration. He didn't want her to witness it. In fact he didn't wish to share this dreaded side of him with anybody. It was his life and nobody was allowed to be part of it. She must be having several questions running in her mind but he didn't have the answers or perhaps he had the answers but wasn't willing to give them away. He'd told her in explicit words they weren't a normal married couple, they were strangers and would remain so...forever!

Thanks for reading

Rose