Jalal pleads, Jodha refuses, and Jalal goes without Jodha!

Friends, there's only one thing I can say about the Jodha Akbar serial right now. It seems to be going almost exactly on the lines of the movie. Whether this is a good thing or a bad thing is what all of us need to work out. If it goes according to the movie, at least we know what next steps to expect. On the other hand if it goes like the movie there are too many in-between steps to happen before they can reconcile and before Jodha decides to go to Agra on their own, so the separation track may extend longer.

If on the other hand, the serial only looks as if it is going on the lines of the movie, but in fact Ekta gives it her own peculiar twists at the climactic stages, then we are back to not knowing anything about what's going to happen. A whole lot of new things can cascade upon us and we may well see Jodha back in Agra at the same speed that Jalal made his way to Amer! In short anything is possible, so we'd better be prepared for the worst and hope for the best.

My friend Jyoti warned me not so long ago that they may make this part of the serial a replica of the movie so that they can stretch this separation track at least till the middle of May to get over the worst TRP erosions of the IPL season. I was personally not sure of that timing, and I thought it would be more likely that the articles we saw (which said Ekta and her team were planning the consummation scenes for end April and beginning of May) may be a more correct timing indication. Anyway, now, as of today, I am in a state of not knowing with certainty what to expect next and in how much time.

But my hunch is that in the next week or two the whole thing between Jalal and Jodha should be reconciled and Jodha may be back in Agra and the Shehnaaz ki raaz track may start. I base this assumption on a prediction that I've formed in my own mind and have shared with you here. My prediction could be wrong entirely, but at least it give me positive hope so I am clinging on to it.

Like most predictions mine too is just a piece of wishful thinking rather than a certainty. But let me see how many of you agree with my prediction, how many disagree, and what other predictions possibilities come from all of you. Let's at least spend the weekend in happier anticipation than in negative moping!

Before I make my comments on the episode, as usual I want to just recap what happened yesterday. There is one scene I thought I would detail ... the last dialogue of Jodha and Jalal on the terrace of the Amer Palace where she refuses to go with him to Agra and he says goodbye.

I thought this scene was important because it gave me a sanket that both of them have reached that farthest point of separation in their lives. It can't get worse than this. That itself seems like a blessing to me, because I now feel that things will return from that brink and the reconciliation phase can start in earnest. Sometimes in life it seems as if things have to get worse before they better, and yesterday I thought I saw that "worst" point that can now give me hopes for the "better" to start.

Here's what happened yesterday ...

The episode started from where the previous one left off. Jalal was telling Jodha at the end of the swordfight that "All is fair in love and war" and Jodha was walking away in a huff. But just then Mainavati and Bharmal who were watching all this from the terrace of the Palace started putting their own interpretations on what Jalal was trying to do to woo back the recalcitrant Jodha. Mainavati explained to Bharmal that they both were obviously in love with each other. But sometimes it happens that one needs more time than the other to come around. Jalal was doing his utmost to win back Jodha and her trust. Mainavati believed that the times were changing and soon enough Jodha would succumb. Or at least that was the pacification she gave Bharmal ... and even Bharmal seemed to be eventually convinced about it.

At Agra, meanwhile, Hamida was following the secretive Maham through the jungle towards the entrance of the surang. But again, just like Javeeda had once lost the trail, Hamida too seemed to lose Maham somewhere in the undergrowth of the forest ... for Hamida could not see the concealed surang entrance through which Maham went. "I must get out here fast" Hamida thought, so she had to abandon her search at that point. Those of us who were wishing Hamida would get to the bottom of Maham's mysterious behaviour have to wait longer!

At Amer again, a feast of sorts was being served to Jalal, all part of the Gangaur ceremony. Jalal ate with gusto after the family had offered prayers, and he prayed in his Mughal style at the table while Bharmal and family prayed in the Hindu style. As was the usual way in those days the men ate first while the ladies supervised their eating.

Jodha showed a lot of care and concern about Jalal when he was eating - admonishing a daasi to get him water and some sherbet - as she knew he could not eat theeka food, without his eyes watering. But such care and concern for him was also on the other hand accompanied by angry looks at him whenever he glanced her way, so it was clear that Jodha had neither lost her care for him nor her anger. She seemed to be fully in that in-between territory of having a soft corner for him as well as indignant anger.

Jodha's mother played her "reverse psychology" card again, by saying to Jodha first "Why don't you also sit by him to see that he eats well?" but then she herself seemed to amend her advice by saying "Oh, no, I forgot, you're angry with him. Then don't sit by him, keep your distance!"Mainavati was happy to see her ploy working for directly contrary feelings flitted on Jodha's face to whatever she said.

After lunch was over, Dadisa told Jalal that one more rasam had to be gone through and this one would be real fun. From among several ladies wearing similar clothes and with their ghunghats fully covering their faces and dancing, he had to be able to pick out his Jodha! "Piece of cake" Jalal thought to himself and he said "I can recognise Jodha with my eyes closed!". Jodha in true double-minded form first said to her mother "I refuse to play this game!". Mainavati again went back to her successful "reverse psychlogy" formula. She said "Oh, yes, I remember that you are angry with your husband and don't want any part in all this. Fine, then you don't play this game. In any case you may lose and that would be insufferable. Remember how badly he has hurt your heart." Jodha bristled visibly and again became all contrary. "No, mother" she told Mainavati, "he hurt me but not intentionally, I assure you, and actually he's an okay person. And who says I will lose. I will play to win!" Mainavati was again thrilled to see her chaal working so well, and along with Dadidsa who was watching all this, she had a hearty laugh at the way she was able to manipulate Jodha's double-mindedness.

Mainavati then summoned a beautiful traditional dress for Jodha to wear and thought to herself "May Ambe Ma be with you" as she explained to Dadisa about Jodha's dichotomy "She loves him but she doesn't seem to be able to surmount her anger yet!"

At Agra, in the mean time, something very interesting was happening. Atga was supervising the process of going through the accounts in detail, when suddenly a man named Ahtmaad Khan requested to meet him. When this man was led in, he turned out to be the broker who normally supplied khwaja seras to the Palace. But Ahtmaad Khan had a strange story to tell Atga. He had brought with him the real Dilawar Khan, the tenth of the ten khwaja seras that had been shortlisted for employ at the Palace when the recruitment drive was taking place. Atga knew that Sujamal has sneaked into the Palace instead of this Dilawar Khan, assuming Dilawar's name, but Atga did not know how this wasachieved, and what Ahtmaad Khan told him rang some alarm bells.

It appeared that the real Dilawar had entreated Mahamanga that his clothes and paraphernalia had been robbed by the impostor (Sujamal) to enter the Palace as a khwaja sera ... but all this was not only known to Mahamanga but she also actively connived at it. She dismissed the real Dilawar and allowed the fake Dilawar to take his place, fully knowing that the switch was happening. She also passed the fake Dilawar without physical tests, and then throughout his stay at the Palace Maham knew that she had a fake Dilawar (a man and not a khwaja sera at all), roaming the harem with ease.

Maham knew everything about Sujamal's entry into the Palace and had deliberately let it happen! Atga bristled at this news and said it would all be brought to Jalal's notice the minute Jalal returned.

At Amer again, Jalal was asked by Dadisa to start his game of picking Jodha from among the five dancers dancing in the central courtyard. Jalal went to the centre of the courtyard and soon was reasonably sure of his Jodha. He caught her hand, and then lifted her ghunghat to show that he knew it was her. He had picked correctly. Jodha looked at him with a mixture of sullenness and anger even as he explained with a cheerful smile that her bracelet had given her away. It was a bracelet that he had gifted her.

But no sooner had his face shown his triumph than Jodha, in an extremely ill-dignified and insulting way, snatched her hand from his and run away in the presence of all who were there for the games. Jalal was mortified by this insult and Bharmal started profusely apologising for his daughter s ungraceful behaviour. But Jalal tried to make light of it by saying "I think she didn't like the way I caught her hand in front of everybody. Let me go and talk to her alone".

As Jodha ran from him, he hastened towards her across the terrace of the buildings and eventually caught up with her, holding her roughly. He then let her hands free and said "Now what I have done wrong again this time? What are you punishing me for? As a husband I just caught your hand, and was that so unbearable that you pulled away? In front of everyone at your maayka, you have made me look foolish! You don't like me touching you, right? OK, so I get it, I won't touch you again or hold your hand. And if you don't even like my presence in front of you, I'll go away as far as I can. I know that I have done great wrong to you, but I am also very mortified that I did this and I am trying to make amends. Despite being the Shahenshah of the Hindustan I have searched from pillar to post myself to find you and say sorry. I left my Palace, my work, my people just to find you ... and you are not even trying to level with me? And remember the big part even you played in starting all this feud between us, for you hid the truth from me, didn't you? My mistake was that I fell for a "galat faimi" and yet even after I asked you about this secretiveness so many times, you never told me. What was I to think?"

"I tried to meet you and tell you many times, but your anger was always in the way. I even came to meet you but was told by Mahamanga that you would not see me." Jodha replied, with a few tears beginning to fill her eyes.

"Wah, I couldn't meet you once and for that you are so angry? You tried just once. And yet here I am trying repeatedly over the last weeks to say I am sorry but what of that? I have gone from Agra to Amer, Amer to Mathura, and again Mathura to Amer just to find you and ask for forgiveness, and in between I even let blood flow from wounds on my body and yet I didn't let go of finding you and asking for forgiveness. I left Agra with a promise to my mother that I would go back with you, and I gave little Rahim that same promise too. But I have lost. So what difference does it make to you that the Emperor of Hindustan couldn't keep his word, or that a son couldn't keep his word to his mother? At least let me be happy that your izzat and guroor has won. I give up my own guroor and stand here in front of you with folded hands and ask again for you will forgive me and come back with me to Agra ..."

"Nahin" said a mulish Jodha. "The one with whom I took my wedding vows gave me nothing of those promises. The one who held my hand for the saat pheres let go of my hand. The one who should have protected my "maan" himself insulted me. You called me a "charithraheen"? At your whim you sent me out of your house and now at your whim you are asking me to go back? Now I will return to Agra and you only when my mind is ready to let me go."

"So this is your last decision?" said Jalal gritting his teeth in frustration and deep anger. " Now you listen to my last decision. I am going back to Agra now. You may insult me but I cannot insult the word I have given to my mother. My Sultanate and people need me back at the helm and I am going back to them. Khuda Hafees, and take care of yourself!"

And with that Jalal went away from her leaving her extremely emotionally charged and blinking away the tears of despondency that were threatening to flood her face.

In the precap we see Jalal has reached Agra and is getting an earful from his mother "Tell me your answer" she says "After all these days away, is this all the answer you can give me to dash my hopes?" Jalal looks at his mother's face bleakly, like a man who has nothing more to say to calm her. Here in Amer, there is a repeat of the same thing. Mainavati is scolding a wooden-looking Jodha "Anything I ask all you say is you don't want it and don't have the mind for it. For the last five days you have been sitting in your room like a piece of furniture and have not even eaten a thing? What is it with you?"

My comments on the episode:

Friends, okay, I at least am beginning to get what ails Jodha. I think I now know what her problem is. Let me see how many of you agree with me, or if your views are different.

I must confess that for the last two days I have been unable to fathom her fully. First she was all numb and like an automaton when she first got to know that Jalal was very wounded and she raised all our hackles by showing no sympathy for him. Then after that, all she was showing was a dichotomy of feelings. She had care and concern for Jalal, that her mother described as love for him, and yet she was so filled with anger that she couldn't look in his eyes or countenance any plea from him for forgiveness. So what were we to make of that?

I kept asking myself "What does Jodha want from Jalal? Why was his every request for forgiveness being constantly thrown back in his face? What was Jodha still angry about (despite caring for his welfare every now and again)?. When he winced with pain, she did too, she felt his every hurt, she anticipated and made sure he got every comfort he needed ... but why couldn't she then tolerate his pleas for forgiveness?"

Most importantly, I asked myself "Why was his "Sorry" making her even angrier than when he accused her of infidelity? Was his "Sorry" not what she wanted? What then did she want from him if not his "Sorry"? What was the psychology ruling Jodha's mind regarding his manner of apology? What was trapping her in a state of suspense between caring and loving on the one side and anger and disgust with him on the other, and why was this disgust so acute whenever he tried to apologise? What had he failed to read in her recalcitrance at forgiving him? Had he -and we- missed some clue she had given us, as to what was making her livid that he was not correctly apologising?"

The penny finally dropped for me when they stood on that terrace talking in this goodbye episode.

At first she said the usual things to him. She said "I tried to tell you but I didn't have access to you. You who had held my hand at my wedding pheras let go of me? You didn't care about our wedding vachans and admonished me to go away from your life, just like that. You even called me a "charitraheen"?" When she said all this it was still sounding to me like she had exactly sounded before and I continued to see nothing new in these accusations of him and her explanations that this was the reason she was angry. If I were Jalal, it still would not have made any new sense because she was starting by just repeating that same opening script again and again and point-blank refusing to forgive him.

But then came out the grand truth.

It was something she had said before also, but we - and Jalal - had not paid especial heed to it. But today it was unmistakeable as she said her last sentence to him. The real reason for her anger came through finally ... verbalised by her in no uncertain terms. She said "Whenever you choose, you send me away, and whenever you choose, you call me back. I will come back only when I feel like coming to Agra and not because of anything you say!"

As I repeatedly saw this scene, I could see not only these words fall out of her mouth with a new clarity inher own mind, but did you all notice the expression on her face as she said this last sentence? She was looking relieved to be saying it out herself!

There was a big sense of "owning herself" behind those words. She had articulated finally that she was feeling trapped in a relationship where he was calling all the shots. He was being the puppeteer and she was feeling like the puppet on strings. He pulled this way, she had to shake this way. He pulled that way, and she had to shake that way.She had had enough. Even now he accused her and she had to take it. And then he apologised and she had to take it. Was nothing ever to be because she wanted it? Was she not even at liberty to choose to accept his apology of her own free will and was he wanting her to accept his apology because he drew the rules and not she?

There was a huge telltale clue that we all missed earlier ...

If you all remember, in that letter she had left for him before going away from Agra, she had written so clearly the same things. She was trying to tell him the same thing. She said "Right from the beginning you decided everything. You decided to hate me, and then you decided to like me. You decided I was wrong and then you decided I was right. You blamed me for the miscarriage and then you absolved me of it. Don't I count as a human being with my own feelings. Am I just somebody dancing to your whims and fancies? Doesn't my "astitva" count for anything? "

In short she was saying "Am I piece of furniture without feelings and wishes of my own? Am I forever trapped in a situation where I must dance to your tune? Am I supposed to be remorseful for your accusations and then grateful now for your apologies? Do you even dictate how I should accept your apologies? Does nothing ever happen because it is of my free will? THIS TIME I WILL COME BACK ONLY WHEN I CHOOSE!"

That folks, feels unmistakeably to me as the real crux of the issue for her. It is not even that he hurt her feelings or called her "charithra" to account. As she told Mainavati at the lunch table today, even Jodha did not really take all that accusation, suspicion or doubts or name-calling to heart. She told her mother, "He is not bad at heart. He has no ill-intentions. It all happened because of a "galat faimi"." So its obvious Jodha does not hate him for doing all those things to her.

But what irks her is the manner of his apology. He apologises fully expecting that his wishes to be forgiven will be honoured by her. He demands her acceptance of his apology. He demonstrates with his apology and his expectations of being forgiven that he rules the direction and tone of their relationship. It is not a relationship of equals if she does not have any part to play of her own free will. She wants to forgive him from her own volition not because he says she must. She wants the initiative to be hers. She wants to feel equal in the relationship and not like a puppet on a string, no matter how much he loves her and she loves him back. She wanted her autonomy, even for the acceptance of his apology!

Notice one very important thing folks ...

... she did not say I will never come back to Agra or to you. But she did say in not so many words "I will come back ... but of my own choosing, of my own free will, of my own autonomous decision. Not because you are expecting me to accept your apology and I have to dance according to the tune you play. If I come it should be because I want to, because I want to accept your apology and not because you expect or want me to. I'll come of my own free will, and it will be at a time and way of my choosing."

Folks, I think I finally got the message, and I hope Jalal has some space and time to get it also.

This girl Jodha is tired of being bidden to do this and do that. She is tired of being spoken to like she has no independent brains. She is an intelligent human being and wants that recognised. She has her own feelings and wants them recognised. She wants an equal status in their relationship and she wants no longer to be treated as a puppet on string. But it has taken so much for even her to be articulating exactly what ails her. She couldn't find the words all this while to make her real needs understood. And he - like us - didn't hear her well enough the last time she said this to him in that goodbye paigam. She did try to explain this but none of us and Jalal too never got that as the crux of the problem.

Jodha will be fine with Jalal if she goes on her own to him, and not because he is holding the strings and asking her to follow his will! Jalal needs to realise that it is not his apology she is unprepared to accept, it is the control of the relationship and its direction that she wants to be on an equal footing.

How many of you think I have got it right? I am dying to know your views!

My prediction for what may happen now ...

I think Jalal will go back to Agra (as shown in the precap) and his mother will be displeased. Here Jodha will be feeling all lost and miserable too (as we see again in the precap).

Meanwhile the unmasking of Maham is going to start happening alomost immediately with the Dilawar Khan story being told by Atga to Jalal. Parallelly, Hamida may also unearth this Maham's surang mystery and discover the plot to give Adham the Delhi takht. And Atga on the other side may get more clues of Adham's embezzlement of the treasury money. I also think there could be this dhakka paigam revelation by Rahim which adds to Maham's exposure.

All this may point out to Jalal a sinister plot by the two bad eggs Maham and Adham, and feeling very miffed with Maham, Jalal may banish her to Delhi (as Abhay says) or he may be at least contemplating it. Maybe he has got enough dope on Maham to banish her but not quite enough financial proof yet on Adham to do something drastic to him. Meanwhile as in the movie maybe Jalal also abolishes the Yathri tax and thus the public are of a mind to entitle him as Akbar.

With all this happening almost simultaneously, perhaps Jodha may herself realise that things are different now and she misses him and she has made her reasons for pushing him away clear. She could go to Agra herself with Shehnaaz in tow. Or it could be that Jalal himself returns to Amer to fetch her, having a new understanding of why Jodha ws negating his apologies.

He may say "I am sorry for the way I was trying to apologise. I was giving you no room to apply your own free will to things and I was holding the reins of the relationship too close to me. I want us to be partners and friends and not a puppeteer and a puppet." And that may be music to her ears! And thus she may accompany him to Agra whereupon the story of Shehnaaz may start in full earnest!

How long will all this take. I am hoping that the unravelling of Maham should not take more than a week, and maybe in the second week, Jalal will fetch Jodha back from Amer? That's my wishful thinking!

mansi, i am happy that she did not go with jalal..she needed that time for herself to realize her love for him and as you mentioned she will go when she feels like that could also mean that if she goes back she will go back as his wife whole heartedly and not because she has to go out of kartavya jaap..i hope that whenever she goes back i want to see my kajri in jodha and not the jodha jodha!

Great post Mansi,

Originally posted by: mandyg

mansi, i am happy that she did not go with jalal..she needed that time for herself to realize her love for him and as you mentioned she will go when she feels like that could also mean that if she goes back she will go back as his wife whole heartedly and not because she has to go out of kartavya jaap..i hope that whenever she goes back i want to see my kajri in jodha and not the jodha jodha!

Spoiler pics already give away she will be in Agra by next week. Jalal will continue to tease her why she came back, but she will refute to admit anything. MM's truth will come out. Jalal will be heartbroken thus leading to consumation. Shaguni Bai will dance in the red outfit saying that the story has turned, and now they have become one soul. There u go..All spoilers.

The Final Battle! A letter to the Shehenshah.

(Mansi, this post was a response to your Thursday post primarily😊 , thought would sooth your grieved heart and also save us from a hike in coconut price! But by the time I posted this, your Friday post is out and here you go with my post coming in here. Though I have factored in Friday episode, pl bear with for anything that you find redundant now or if you have your answers already pl feel free to ignore this post. I am yet to read your post - will do it shortly. And the length, am known for this now, but still to let you know wanted to do some justice when putting my points across.)

Friends: This is now posted as a separate thread as advised by some friends. See you there.

I have been watching the last few days of your life and what you have been undergoing. I suppose, unknowingly you have given a call for "The Final Battle", a battle that is very much yours. But true to your character, you will win this battle as well. Here, is my victory tilak on your forehead, a victory that is yours for sure.

And if you wonder, how I am so sure of your victory - is it the faith in your sword, intelligence or MA's counsel? Well, this time, I would say it is the faith in the weapon you are wielding. While, you have said that you have lost battles before, which I still look at only as a stepping stone and the due victory still in that sense, still taking it as defeat so far, today you can be confident that it is Advantage Jalal.

Because, today you have the powerful weapon called love' and you also know how to wield it without any inhibition. You are comfortable with it and also realize it as your true power. And, for a change, your beloved is defenseless. The very love with which she won everyone all these days, is now waiting to defeat her.

A word of caution though... wield your weapon smartly!

Let me share with you some thoughts and you could decide (taking guidance from CVs) on your next course. For this, first, I would like to take you back to the days when Bakshi Bano broke your trust. How were you feeling then? Let us not get into the details of what she did or how she did, was she justified (given her love for Sherrifuddin) or not etc. etc. The scope of the discussion is only w.r.t. your emotions post the incident. Your heart was broken, you felt totally betrayed. Someone you would have trusted all your life has done this unthinkable right? And it was such an unbearable punishment both for her and you. Still, you stuck to it. Though you may argue on the grounds of being just (which seem compromised in the case of Adham and MA), my question here is that the intent of being just alone the reason or the hurt caused to you, a brother, a reason as well, if you want me to put it that way? And how were you those days - during the court case and even post that? Bakshi pleaded mercy, even Jodha, the directly affected party here had forgiven her and pleaded for her mercy. Were you in a mental frame to discuss the matter with anyone, be it Bakshi herself or anyone else? You were sulking and sulking by the day. It had wiped out all traces of smile from your face those days, you were badly affected. You could not bear to be let down by someone so very dear and trusted upon. You could not even bear a lie from Ruqaiyya (Harem election lie) and ofcourse, Jodha's hiding of the secret from you, meaning, she not trusting you, ate into you every moment. You could not carry on with your kingly duties, you lost your sleep and were heartbroken to be let down on your faith that she has faith in you. I understand what exactly you had gone through then Jalal, its perfect and in place, every bit of your emotion. I think even to be told that you are hated by your beloved is bearable compared to being let down on trust. And then your resultant outburst on the night and the throwing away of your very life. I could feel your pain very much, it was such a tough moment for you. And I suppose it was more a tough moment for you, when you realized the truth, for which you could not forgive yourself. It has been eating into you more than when the secret was withheld from you and you would be at peace only when you are forgiven for this big sin of yours. Again, I perfectly appreciate what you are going through now. I also, appreciate your earnest effort towards this and win back your love. As I said above, end of this, victory is written as yours! And I am happy about it.

Now, coming back to the battle on hand, everyone is aware of your intelligence and war prep. You go the extent of going in disguise to assess the enemy's strengths and weakness. You do such a detailed study of your enemy. You strategize smartly and every move is executed to perfection for that lasting victory. When the prep is done well, it is like battle half won already as you know and why you do also. So, in the current battle you are being engaged, I would like to understand what is your strategy, what prep work have you done and how much have you have understood to win your battle (contextually)? And what is it you are exactly looking to win over here?

I can hear you saying saaf saaf bataayiye. I may not be doing just that, but I am willing to present the case in front of you for your decision.

If the goal of this battle is to win your wife's love - then let me tell you that you will never achieve this. I know you are stunned to hear this. But, my simple question to you is, how can something that is already won, be won over again? Whenever you are saying that I will win her love (be it to Abul Mali or your self talk), you seem to be contradicting yourself, who have seen, experienced and said that Jodha loves you and cares for you. Does this then mean the battle is over, meaning nothing to be fought about? Well, not quite so, as you have only love now and there is something else which still remains to be won and as you would have guessed, her Trust. And this is battle for which I put the tilak on you.

And what is that she is not trusting? Your love? Is she not able to see feelings and relate to your outpour, or even the desperate search for her? Hers is a broken heart gripped by insecurity and fear, as I see. And her reaction and external responses are a product or those to hide these. In the process of loosing your trust on her, you have lost her trust very much. (My data point for her above state would be her soul talk on the showdown night, talk to Krishna, plea to Jalal on the banks of the lake. There is a concern that Jodha does not self talk, but when she does I am not sure how many are willing to listen to her!) The insight that I get from the quoted data points is that she knows the extent to which he loves her, but her heart is broken now as her trust is broken, the very trust which is the basis and which blossomed into love later and this is broken by the one whom she loves (night self-talk in palace), and secondly, that she is not sure that there might not be a repeat (refer outpour to her Krishna) of this repeat. She has taken a tough decision and is unwilling to be in this situation yet again - she pleaded to be let alone (near lake), she refuses to be treated this way anyway anymore - by the whim and fancy of Jalal (she is tired of this - outpour to Krishna). Well Jalal, you might not be aware of these talks, but you need to know this for sure, you need to understand why she is unwilling to forgive you though, importantly, when she loves you so much, you need to get to the root of the problem if you want it solved.

Coming back, when this is the situation on hand, how is it being resolved by you now? By saying that you love her, cannot live without her, forgive you and return to Agra. Do any of these statements of yours address the core issue stated above? So, summarily, are you solving the right issue is the question I would like to ask you? Are your actions directed to win what needs to be won?

You may also want to take notice of the fact that these are repetitive and consider if there could be any other factors contributing to these repeat issues between you both (when many a time you accuse each other still when the other denies a role to it)! All these days you both were only forgiving each other's mistakes because of your love for the other, which you are seeking now also, but did you realize that you both have not been forgetting those? The outburst by you both stands proof to this statement? And, is there an understanding and mutual respect for what each other value, be it your self-esteem or Mughal Saltanat esteem and likewise vachan etc for her? Please think about it.

Now, I would like to place few other data points in your presence for you to ponder. You are now concluding her reaction to be from her bloated ego. I do not want to get into an argument on whether she has ego or not. I just have few questions to you. Did her letter give an impression of ego (atleast you did not react that way) or did it give that impression when she went into the lake at Mathura or did she give this impression while pleading to be left alone (near the lake)? She also cooked for you at Mathura and willingly made the lep for you (Bharmal was not there then) - did you see any signs of ego then? Or is it that you are only seeing this reaction at Amer? So, even if we take that she has an ego now and hence her reaction at Amer, based on the above two pointers, could it be that she developed this ego now? And if so, what could be the reason?

Let us park this for a moment here and go back to Bakshi Bano with which we started this discussion. So, Jalal, w.r.t. Bakshi your trust was broken and you were devastated now. And when people were trying to take the topic, you did not encourage nor did you talk it out with anyone, you had wanted your space and time to reconcile. Suppose in this mental frame of yours, let us say, Bakshi went on pressuring you to forgive you, how would you have reacted? Or if HB and all others took Bakshi's side and were pressurizing you directly or indirectly to forgive her, how would you have reacted? (Bakshi's case was later taken up by when she was pregnant). And worse case, without understanding the depth of your wound and your state, not being sensitive, if you were engaged in such conversation as teasing and action that net-net amounts to mockery of your feelings (though not intentional), how would you have reacted? And after all this, if you are told that you are high on your ego?????? which someone swears to break it also? Tell me, what exactly would you have done in this situation? Revolted? But, here again, there is a catch that your hands are tied. You are emotionally blackmailed. You are hit at your weakest point and you are pushed to put your values before emotions, while being claimed that it is fair to do so in love and war. Net-net you are pushed to do what you do not want to and yet named egoistic. How will you behave in such a situation?

I am sure by now you have understood what I want to say. And, Jodha is deeply in love with you and she sees that she is vulnerable on that count. You may want to recollect that she asked to turn your face away when applying the lep and later when you lost balance and she held you, her eyes revealed a lot (if one believes in eye reading, I know you do that). That is what she herself is fighting against, her own emotions. Her intellect tells her to keep away, but her mind refuses to pull away.

Her own words that she has still not forgiven you - does it not indicate that she would? And that she has not closed the doors for good?? She first has to reconcile it for herself. She needs the time and space just as you needed then for Bakshi's incident. And I am sure you are able to understand the magnitude of the situation now in comparison to Bakshi's. Then what to say? What caused it, who caused it and who all are responsible for it is beyond the point and the discussion here. The fact of the matter is - that which is not to be said has been said.

Heart is not a toy to be used and thrown by one's whims and fancy (like you might have been used to toys at Harem). I am not essentially saying you are this bad, but what I am trying to point out is that it does not work like that of a heart surgery, where it gets torn, then stitched immediately and then, ready for the next tear. Even here, it has to recover back completely, before it is actually even ready for the next tear! So don't you think that her torn heart first needs to recuperate? But the heart can recuperate not just by not taxing it, but also giving the required medicine. So, do you think instead of going to the medicine (for yourself - sword scene), you could be the soothing and strengthening medicine for this grave injury of your beloved wife and help her to recuperate? I agree that she could have treated you better in public, but you were graceful enough still not to hold it against her.

Well, you may argue that you tried talking to her (though am not sure what you would have talked if given a chance - maybe forgive you, how desperately you searched for her and request her to come back to Agra?). Before that did you assess if she is in a mental frame to talk. You did not want to talk either during Bakshi's case. So, what to do then is your question right? My answer is you could try to do what your wife did then. She asked you to forgive, when she saw that it was not working, she tried to rationalize, but did not push you beyond a point. She presented her case and left it for it to work on you. Later, when there was a good case on hand (Bakshi s pregnancy) she took it up emphatically. So, give your beloved time to reconcile, then as she settles down talk and clarify things, then win her trust back by your act. Please note that talking will only clarify, but action will only convince. But talking is also needed to sustain the conviction. You guys need to bare your chest to each other. But at the right time please.

Hope you would have realized that by your current action you are bruising her more and making her more aggressive. By the way did you notice that she is not wearing green dress these days - any message? You may want to think about it?

So, end of the day it does not matter whether she is at Agra or Amer, these need to fall in line. But it matters whether you are at Amer or Agra, as it is only from Agra that your action can be seen. And for the action to be seen, maybe she has to be in Agra?? I give it to you for holding her weak point (HB) and pushing her to go to Agra, if this can be achieved. I also would like to say that there is not much of risk from MA or Ruk now as I see. Ofcourse, if you hold on to the ego' conclusion, you are vulnerable and this card could be played on you- alert! Resolve to yourself, that you will not succumb to any such and be steadfast in your goal of winning Jodha back. You resolved earlier too that you will not allow silence between the both of you (Kajri days), but it lacked implementation. So, when you resolve, resolve for good.

And importantly, even if she is it at Agra, remember that she has to come to you. This time make her come to you. Stay true to your words to Abdul, that she will come to you. This is what will work in the long run too. I remember sharing this with my friend Radhika sometime back that you have to wait for her to return, decision hers. And you, ofcourse, know that this is well done by your gentle and effective act as well. And if required give the required shock too to jolt her up and bring her to reality, else she just sulks away (you saying that you are going back to Agra to your people is a good step in this direction, am sure it will work on her. Only when pushed to the edge, people really act and with such dertermination. She will feel the force of you in her now). She would also need the right company who can help her through this rough time, make her see things in the right perspective etc., I only hope Shehnaaz will play in here. And, I wish you also get some good buddy out there who would help you see things and enable you on your important role here, for your eternal love life to kick off. Though I wish that buddy to be Jodha itself, given the state of affairs now, Jodha herself needs help. This love is a new experience to her also just as for you, and she is struggling herself with it, again just as you with the inability to understand the other and the resultant conclusion of each other. But I do place my hope in that given time Jodha could introspect, understand her areas of improvement as well and handle things better. But some kind of reassurance from you is very much required though for the new journey to kick start. She is not even opening up because of the lack of it. Now, here again, just do not give a vachan that you will trust her eternally, though she loves vachan. Your action should speak instead. And remember, it has always been your act, that has won her faith and thereby the resultant love for you. And this whole thing may take some time as you see, but worth all the wait for sure! And while I say all this, Jodha very much has her bit to do as well (it is a letter to you and so her role is not elaborated). She has to accept the fact that she loves you way too much to be cut from you, but at the same time be clear on how the relationship should move forward, not giving room for any more strain in future. She has her homework to do. It is the sustained effort of both that could see this through. And the fact that she has said that she will come to you when she feels so (ready), clearly points out her intention to return and the big first step taken in this direction.

Some quotes that may inspire you:

To win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill.

The best victory is when the opponent surrenders of its own accord

Best wishes! May you be victorious!

Caution: When you return to Agra, you may be in yet another situation where you will be at cross roads to trust HB or MA. It is not easy for you to doubt MA, how can it be possible for anyone who is told that one's parent is a traitor to oneself? But nevertheless, you need to face it. Maybe, yet another instance of a life being at stake shaking you up, could bring the truth in front you. Also, Ruks might have fallen in love with you too in this period of separation!!!!

(In my view, this separation track is very much needed and should not be rushed through.)

This post is dedicated to to you Mansi, a consistent brilliant writer. This post, ofcourse, is also dedicated to you dear Jalal - you guessed it right on the font colour.

i realy wish dat u stand correct here Mansi bt if dat is the case den i'll realy want the CVs to make her speak out all these wen Hypervati asks her or wen she is all alone wondering wat is wrng...
coz till nw she remained numd+dumb...coz evrytym we r not supposed to speculate things on our own yardey shud realy convey dat to us thru their creativity...
i also want her to return as Jallu's wife nd nt Hypervati's KARTAVYAPURN RAJVANSHI HONHAAR AMERI PRINCESS😡which she is till nw😆...m fade up of the kartavya vachans...
bt fr dat shadi k fere i disagree wid her nd i hv my own reasons too😆😉
anywys thnx to ur post atleast we can stay +ve😆

Yes. It does look like She accepted his apology, BUT would like to go back when her mind is a bit clearer. She does not want to be treated as a commodity but flesh and blood.

@Kaana... Beautiful piece ! U should make a separate post!

Mansi lovely post