J.E.A.L.O.U.S. Series of 7 OS (LAST part updated) - Page 5

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sukriti11196 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#41

Originally posted by: niranjanastar

l-lavender

beautiful DESCRIPTION!
wow sweety u rocked and surprised me as usual !
u have brilliantly penned down the story and it's very good
to read ur work!
and ur last part was to lovely and thanks for making on sanyus p.o.v.
just loved each and every little thing in ur story!
keep on writing dear u r rally talented!
and something is different in ur story !
it is not usual type and i'm eagerly waiting for ur future works!

p.s a bouquet of roses with sorry for not regularly commenting!
a box of chocolates for ur sweet work!
a room of snacks all u wish for ur pm!

always with love
#niru


was looking for your comment on the last update...
and i was like...one is missing..
why why why..
and now here you are...
thank you for commenting yet again...

P.S - i love chocolates and flowers..thank you😆😆
sukriti11196 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#42

Originally posted by: Prachijainn

RES!

WILL UNRES 2MORROW WITH DESCRIPTION OF EACH PART
OHK?!
---------edited---------
Sukriti!!! (right na)😊
First of all this J.E.A.L.O.U.S. concept is really awesome!!!👏

Part 1 JADE

First I thought it was about Sandhir but it was Vardhan and Neharika
But never my mind
The way u have described Neharika's eyes is so damn PERFECT!!!😊
It was short but a sweet one👏

Part 2 ENGINEERING
The way u have described Randhi's POV is very good
I really loved these lines

And slowly and steadily these small arguments, these ego clashes, this bantering, the competitions, these challenges have become a part of my life,
and day without all this is like
Food without spice,
Me without my punching bag and
she without her god-knows-what-filled Handbag

I am really angry on myself because I didn't read this J.E.A.L.O.U.S. OS before😡
And yes this engineering is really IMP in Sandhir's life😊
I completely agree with you on this point😊

Part 3 ABNEGATION (Randhir's POV)

OMG!!!
This is really a unique OS!!!
The question-answering thing between Randhir and his mind was just AWESOME!!!👏👏
This part is very fav. part of mine
I just loved each and every line of it

Part 4 ABNEGATION (Sanyukta's POV)

The way u have defined Sandhir's POV is so FANTASTIC!!!👏👏
Nobody has described it in this manner
And this unique style of urs is VERRRY GOOD!!!👏👏
The best lines from this part were
His presence if not physically but verbally is important to her...
Their fights are like oil to machine..,
Their bickering is part of her daily routine now...,

Part 5 LAVENDER

Now I am a BIG FAN of urs😊
The way u have used this L for Lavender is sooo UNIQUE and perfect
Even I agree with this POV
Randhir should not have doubted Sanyuka!


PS:Extremely sorry to reply this late
I was out of town
So couldn't reply


First of all welcome aboard...🤗

and as for late reply..don't worry
am glad that you at least did...

now this is the longest comment i have ever had..
so thank you so much..
I had an avid smile through out reading this...

comments always feel special..
even if one line...
and yes from now on looking forward
to your comments..😊😊.

P.S - yup it's SUKRITI..and i guess your's PRACHI???


Prachijainn thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#43

Originally posted by: sukriti11196


First of all welcome aboard...🤗

and as for late reply..don't worry
am glad that you at least did...

now this is the longest comment i have ever had..
so thank you so much..
I had an avid smile through out reading this...

comments always feel special..
even if one line...
and yes from now on looking forward
to your comments..😊😊.

P.S - yup it's SUKRITI..and i guess your's PRACHI???



Will be waiting for ur update
Yes it's Prachi!

Your very big fan!
Prachi

Edited by Prachijainn - 11 years ago
sukriti11196 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#44
Hello to all!!!
Before starting the OS i would just like to thank all those who liked the
L-Lavender part and
a special thanks to those few people who even commented
and this chapter is dedicated to all those
especially Prachijaan, who took the out the time to write such a long comment with her
favorites of each chapter

Its this support which keeps the writer going, thank you and without any further delay
I present you the fifth installment of the J.E.A.L.O.U.S

ONCOMING

He adjusted his bow, little there and umm Perfect, he thought with a satisfied smile.

Dressed up in a black charcoal tuxedo, with white shirt that gave away a glimpse of his muscular body.

He was truly looking nothing less than a Greek God today, a man dressed to impress to be accurate.

Even he admitted to himself, that he looked good, BUT
when has he not, he thought with his proud smirk.

C'mon lover boy, we're getting late
Hold your breath, coming and with one final glance,
he took a deep breath and now was all ready to reach
his destination where now his life was waiting for him.

She was looking beautiful, eternal to be precise,
with her sequined gown, pearl earrings and a sparkling headgear
with her hair open and tiny fringes teasing her,
just the way his fingers did, she thought with a shy smile.

The glow on her face could easily be made out, even when a tinge of nervousness was still persisting.

He finally reached his destination, the beautiful St.Lovish church
and got down all ready to make her his,
not that she wasn't but now she would be his,
OFFICIALLY and with ALL RIGHTS RESERVED for him.

He now finally stood in front of the priest, and then she came.

She entered all poised and calm, but was a bundle of nerves inside,
and with her first step the air changed, she instantly looked up
only to meet the owner of molten chocolate orbs and
she relaxed and smiled.

She walked towards him and even if he was standing still, she knew he has walked with her whenever she needed him.

He saw her walking towards him and even if she was walking he knew she had always stood up
for him, by him and for them.

And now they stood in front of each other, and said the words that changed their relationship,
I DO, they both said together with full blown smiles,
claiming all rights on each other.

And that's when the beginning sweet yet spicy journey of

RANDHIR and SAYUNKTA SHEKHAWAT's

married life was marked.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N - I hope you liked this one,I wanted Randhir and Sayunkta to marry in christian style
so here it is
I hope you enjoyed and yes it was an out and out SANDHIR !!!!

and yes ONCOMING means moving towards you (depicted in the last paras)

Thank you for reading

Cheerios

P.S - positive criticism is welcome, so are LIKES and COMMENTS...(please)😃😃

P.P.S - buddy me for PMs if you wish to of course

Edited by sukriti11196 - 11 years ago
unishaz thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#45
awesome dear.. Love it.. thanks for pm..
Prachijainn thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#46
RES!
As I saw ur update first I reserved it
You dedicated this chapter to meee!
OMG I am really overwhelmed!
Res again!
Reading right now
----------edited-------

It was short but very sweet😊👏
The way you have described each and every thing is sooo AMAZING!!!👏
You really have a style of your own!
Even I wanted to see Sandhir's marriage in church and here I get it😳
Thank u for showing their marriage in christian style!😊

Update real soon
PS: Thanx for the dedication Sukruti and also for the pm😊
Edited by Prachijainn - 11 years ago
TashaForever thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#47
Wow! This is the first time I came across this fic and my god!
Sukriti! Im damn impressed! The way you have penned the stuff... awesome xD
And what a creative concept!
kudos to you!
keep writing dear, am waiting for more updates :D
Marriage ...Hmmm seems intriguing xP
~Tanya
PrussianBlue thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#48
Hey Sukriti! I'm sorry I couldn't read and comment on the earlier parts because I was busy preparing for my entrances! I had typed out a really long comment, but my stupid internet stopped working and all the matter got lost! After reading both parts of Abnegation, Lavender and Oncoming, all I can say is that your brains are brilliant! I love the spectrum of emotions that you put the characters and us through! Portrayed brilliantly! Great going, Sukriti! Hats off!
Only one suggestion! Try and increase the use of punctuation, so the story looks more presentable and the reader doesn't have any difficulty in understanding the flow of the story!

Always,
Arushi
TeekhiMishti thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#49
Hello sukriti.
Firstly I am really sorry I couldn't comment earlier I was really busy with my college and exams.
You have done a commendable job with this dear. The concept is so different and refreshing. Its a treat to read. I love the idea of jealous.
I want to specifically The first shot you started with vardhan and niharika had my heart skip a beat I was so happy reading that. There truly isn't much written on them even I wanted to read. So thank you for that.
All the other stories have been equally great you have showed the feelings and the emotions to perfection even though using less words. My favorite for sure is abnegation it showed both their dil ka haal and was penned down to perfection.
And the lavender showed the essence of the story jealousy and its consequences beautifully written.
but oncoming was the one which made me the happiest :) wow. so they are finally one. awesome it was.
one complaint I have though is why do you write so short? try writing a bit longer buddy ;) but never the less you do wonders in evne your short write ups.
It was a real good read sukriti :) Waiting for the the next one :)
love,
ari :)
sukriti11196 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#50

Originally posted by: Prachijainn

RES!

As I saw ur update first I reserved it
You dedicated this chapter to meee!
OMG I am really overwhelmed!
Res again!
Reading right now
----------edited-------

It was short but very sweet😊👏
The way you have described each and every thing is sooo AMAZING!!!👏
You really have a style of your own!
Even I wanted to see Sandhir's marriage in church and here I get it😳
Thank u for showing their marriage in christian style!😊

Update real soon
PS: Thanx for the dedication Sukriti and also for the pm😊


Thank you for the comment...
will work on the length definitely...
its like everyone is actually complaining...😛😛😆
will work for sure...

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