Let's eradicate RAPE - Pg13- Rape within Family & Solution

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debbie

@Debbiee

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

Dear Readers,

Here is a thread I open to know your opinion on "How to prevent rape!?". Please send your input in form of a solution rather than opposing others. Your opnion is valuable for me. As some of you know that I am in a process of editing and publish my FF "The Curse of DAMINI" as a book; I would like to put this subject there as something the protagonist would discuss with journalists.

MY OPINION

Of course there should be strong laws to control rape. However it's my belief; no law alone can eradicate rapes from this world forever. As long as we humans live under the sun, rapes would keep on happening.

Forcing the female counterpart in sex is inherent to males; be man or animal. Men have a greater interest in multiple sexual partners and a greater willingness to mate without commitment. Rape, as Science suggests, is one of the many behaviours resulting from these evolved differences in male and female sexuality.

So is it possible to control a behaviour which is inherent in a human being? There is no problem in this world without solution.

As a child I read that once upon a time in India we had a tenure called 'Ram Rajya' where there was no murder, no robbery and absolutely no rape. An era when Sita was kidnapped, rapes might be occuring then as well; however during 'Ram Rajya' it did not happen. So what was different in that kind of society which we lack today?

The key is to find out the root cause of the incidents and act proactively. If you study the background of the rapists you would know that most of them were poor, uneducated and lead a loveless life. Saying so I am not justifying their act; however I am trying to find out a positive, proactive solution.

It's my belief. If there is no hunger, there is no snatching of food.

If everyone is happy prosperous, nobody would rob.

If everyone is happy, morally educated, and prosperous and stable in life no one would rape.

Strong laws are to remain. However the key of every problem is overall prosperity, education, good upbringing, love & affection and peace of mind.

SOLUTIONS THAT I PROPOSE

1. Changes are needed in each sphere of life. A minimum education should be mandatory for everyone and education should not be limited to a degree only. Certain amount of social service should be part of the curriculum. People should learn respecting women.

2. Mothers should play vital role of inculcating good habits as well as respect for women in children. If a boy watches his mother being abused by her father and elders every day, how he would learn to respect women? If a mother teaches her daughter not to protest against ill-treatment where else she would learn it from?

3. Punishment is a reactive approach. Even if the culprit is hanged till death; what a father would get who has lost his daughter in rape and murder? Also it's not always possible to prove a rape. The law should also protect the innocent.

The basic aim should be how a man would not will to commit rape out of his own, rather than under the fear of some punishment. Because as soon as the fear of is gone; the basic nature would come back.

I strongly believe that this could stop totally, if it did not occur then, then why now?

Edited by Debbiee - 11 years ago

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SPuja

@SPuja

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

First of all - animals rarely indulge in forced sex - it is not an inherent part of being male. In my view, rape and prostitution are sociological issues - it is not related to biology. Therefore, such behaviour can be controlled.

The family is starting point for all values. Gender equality should start from family - outside influence cannot make any impact unless gender equality is achieved at family level. The boys have to be taught to respect girls/women just like they teach girls to be submissive, to do household work etc.

Punishment is a necessary evil till the society changes - since it is impossible to achieve a perfect society - punishment has to be there to deal with the people breaking the law. Even if death penalty cannot bring back the victim - at least it will instill some fear in criminals and if even then they do crime - at least they cannot get away with it.

In Ram rajya - may be there was no rape - but still the women were not equal to men, otherwise Sita vanvas would not have happened.

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debbie

@Debbiee

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

Originally posted by: SPuja
First of all - animals rarely indulge in forced sex - it is not an inherent part of being male. In my view, rape and prostitution are sociological issues - it is not related to biology. Therefore, such behaviour can be controlled.
The family is starting point for all values. Gender equality should start from family - outside influence cannot make any impact unless gender equality is achieved at family level. The boys have to be taught to respect girls/women just like they teach girls to be submissive, to do household work etc.

Punishment is a necessary evil till the society changes - since it is impossible to achieve a perfect society - punishment has to be there to deal with the people breaking the law. Even if death penalty cannot bring back the victim - at least it will instill some fear in criminals and if even then they do crime - at least they cannot get away with it.

In Ram rajya - may be there was no rape - but still the women were not equal to men, otherwise Sita vanvas would not have happened.

SPuja, animal do rape. You can google this theory. For example here is a link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sociobiological_theories_of_rape . Forcing females for sex is inherent in a male.

I often wondered, how to prevent rape proactively. In U.K. where the british laws are strongest and there is not much social pressure on women to conceal rape; still this crime happens heavily. Hence I again wonder, would punishment alone would be enough to prevent rape?

When you google, you would find many links telling you how not to be raped. What prevention you have to keep in mind. However nobody talks how to make it not happen ever.

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SPuja

@SPuja

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

I have read that article - coercive sex is not equal to rape because we do not understand animal language and behaviour completely and also not all animals display such acts. I bet such articles are being written mainly by male writers/researchers - in my view - defending male atrocities against females is inherent nature of human males. So, we have theories on why male has to rape, why male has to be promiscuous etc.

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debbie

@Debbiee

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

Originally posted by: SPuja
I have read that article - coercive sex is not equal to rape because we do not understand animal language and behaviour completely and also not all animals display such acts. I bet such articles are being written mainly by male writers/researchers - in my view - defending male atrocities against females is inherent nature of human males. So, we have theories on why male has to rape, why male has to be promiscuous etc.

Valid point Spuja. I am not an expert in that area to challenge this theory. However during writing that chapter in my FF, I came across many such articles based on this theory.

Also I have observed that men are sexually more active than females. Not only in India, but abroad as well men pursue women; well mostly. Good or bad intentions, it's men mostly who are proactive in this area 😆

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BarbieGurl

@BarbieGurl

Explorer

Posted: 11 years ago

Theres a survey 90% of rape victims knew their attackers.
Most rapes r done by relatives, friends, boyfriends, colleagues...only 10% rapes r by creepy men kidnapping an unsuspecting victim.
How r women supposed to prevent rape whn the curlpit is a known trusted person ??
Rape is not abt lust or sex...its abt control.
Rapes happen everywhere even in gulf countries.
Only way to control rape is to raise men properly.Instead of telling girls how to prevent rape better tell men not to rape...
till we hav a mysogonist patrichal society rapes will happen...no. matter whatever preventive actions we take.

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debbie

@Debbiee

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

Originally posted by: BarbieGurl
Theres a survey 90% of rape victims knew their attackers.
Most rapes r done by relatives, friends, boyfriends, colleagues...only 10% rapes r by creepy men kidnapping an unsuspecting victim.
How r women supposed to prevent rape whn the curlpit is a known trusted person ??
Rape is not abt lust or sex...its abt control.
Rapes happen everywhere even in gulf countries.
Only way to control rape is to raise men properly.Instead of telling girls how to prevent rape better tell men not to rape...

Good suggestion Barbie; even after going through many sites I also found this is the only way to prevent this. Mothers alone should teach boys to respect women.

Again we are discussing how to prevent pro-actively. I am not discussing how not to get raped. Many sites advise us already on the same.

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SPuja

@SPuja

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

Originally posted by: Debbiee

Valid point Spuja. I am not an expert in that area to challenge this theory. However during writing that chapter in my FF, I came across many such articles based on this theory.

Also I have observed that men are sexually more active than females. Not only in India, but abroad as well men pursue women; well mostly. Good or bad intentions, it's men mostly who are proactive in this area 😆

Men being active in this area is a different thing. Perhaps women are conditioned to suppress their feelings in this area or perhaps women know that there is much more to life than this particular aspect.

We don't have to be an expert to see through all this.

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BarbieGurl

@BarbieGurl

Explorer

Posted: 11 years ago

Originally posted by: Debbiee

Valid point Spuja. I am not an expert in that area to challenge this theory. However during writing that chapter in my FF, I came across many such articles based on this theory.

Also I have observed that men are sexually more active than females. Not only in India, but abroad as well men pursue women; well mostly. Good or bad intentions, it's men mostly who are proactive in this area😆

men r sexually more active becoz its result of centuries of conditioning...feminism is barely 50 yrs old...wait for few more centuries women will overtake men in sexuality just like is all other fields ;-)
I knw of several cases where older women exploited younger teenage boys coz they had power to control them.Men n women r no different...they can be equally good or bad based on conditioning