Dealing with unwelcome attention @rithvik_RD in Asian Age More: http://www.asianage.com/people/unwelcome-attention-830 ...
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Unwelcome attention
Female fans get away with untoward behaviour towards male actors that wouldn't be considered acceptable if the genders were reversed
To say that Sherlock star Benedict Cumberbatch has a dedicated female fan following would be a bit of an understatement. Countless gifs "immortalising" his every move, websites set up by Cumberb****es (what female fans of the actor call themselves, though he has repeatedly said he finds the term offensive), posts dissecting his images there's nothing fans won't do to express their adoration for the actor. And Cumberbatch has managed to deal with the attention with grace.
But even he was taken aback when a female audience member at the recently-concluded Toronto International Film Festival (where the actor was promoting his film The Imitation Game, on the life of World War II cryptographer Alan Turing) asked him, "Benedict... you're really quite yummy. Would I be able to feast on your yumminess?" The actor blushed, but managed to deflect the odd comment with a humorous remark.
With the video of the incident shared on social networking sites, several commentators observed that had a male fan asked a similar question to Benedict's co-star Keira Knightley (who was also seated next to him on the podium), he would undoubtedly have been escorted out of the room.
The incident highlights that while male actors also do face a certain amount of objectification, with female fans sometimes crossing the line, there simply isn't the same amount of censure. While ideas like, "He's a man, he's sure to enjoy the attention" are often used to explain away why an actor shouldn't be bothered by unwarranted female attention, there is also the perception that the objectification of men simply isn't as insidious or serious a problem as that of women in the industry.
So it is that when Varun Dhawan's shirt was ripped off by some overzealous female fans while promoting Main Tera Hero, not much was made of the incident. Other actors we spoke to also disclosed that there are times when they've dealt with requests from female fans that they don't know how to respond to.
TV actor Nakuul Mehta, who plays Adi in the popular show Pyaar Ka Dard Hai, recounts how a middle-aged woman visitor to the sets went beyond the usual greet-and-hug routine and tried to kiss him. "The wet, sloppy kiss landed very close to my lips! I was too taken aback at what had happened to react. A minute later, she introduced me to her husband and other family members, who had also accompanied her. I could hardly process what was going on," says Nakuul, who tied the knot in 2012.
Nakuul says he usually uses humour to deal with such situations, and prefers to laugh off moments when fan behaviour crosses a line. His contemporary Rithvik Dhanjani says he also uses a similar approach when dealing with untoward attention. Rithvik, who rose to popularity with shows like Pyaar Ki Ek Kahaani, Pavitra Rishta, MTV Fanaah, Jhalak Dikhhlaa Ja and Nach Baliye, was approached by a group of girls at a concert for a photograph. "I happily obliged. Later, one of the girls cheekily asked if she could kiss me. Shocked, I laughed it off and moved on," he says.
Receiving proposals of marriage from female fans is also commonplace. Model Amit Ranjan, who is a regular on the ramp at the Lakme Fashion Week, admits to having received such attention. He tells us how, when he was attending a college festival in Delhi, an 18-year-old student kept staring at him and approached him for a picture. A few minurtes later, she asked Amit to marry her! "I have heard requests like Can I touch your hair?' and Can I take a picture with you?'," says Amit, laughing. "But this was the first time I was faced with a proposal. I hid my shock and laughed it off."
TV star Aamir Ali too had a female fan writing him letters that proposed marriage. She even outlined plans to elope with him, if he consented. "I didn't take it seriously till the letters and calls became frequent. I had to stop taking her calls to send across the right message. Eventually, it stopped," the actor says. Aamir is thankful that social networking sites have made it easier to connect with his fans. "You can respond to them and they get to see the real me, and that makes my life simpler," he says.
Despite being occasionally shocked by fans' behaviour, most actors say they try to take it in good spirit. "A lot of times the intention isn't wrong. They are just overwhelmed and don't know how to express it. If at all, they cross the line, I keep my response tongue-in-cheek without being rude," says Nakuul Mehta, and adds, "Abroad, fans end up being a lot more invasive and even tap your backside for attention!"
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